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BasilNotes
[28745083]
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# Statistics
Favourites: 282; Deviations: 45; Watchers: 22
Watching: 16; Pageviews: 7234; Comments Made: 502; Friends: 16
# Comments
Comments: 180
Ruby: The joys of being an only child.
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nani: i want to run a porn shop!
femnomicon: OVER MY DEAD BODY
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NomiRandy: And trust me she's a book she can't die.
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Nani: dadddddy! you are supposed to cover me!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
NomiRandy: I'm not sleeping on the couch again.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Fem!Lee: Don't tease or you'll be sleeping on the couch too mister.
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Biffy: i could overpower you, yknow?
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Fem!Lee: Hmm let's see who ends up on top tonight love.
Ruby: Ewwww.
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randy: i got the same thing with my parents here
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Ruby: have you ever walked into them doing it in the kitchen?
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Randy: worse, i found some...evidence in the sink
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Ruby: if they're anything like my parents. Stay away from fruits and string cheese
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Randy:...oh my god, dont remind me
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Randy: Yeah, i go for her. CHildhood friend and got a nice round bottom
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(Preparing for Party)
Butler: Excuse me, Miss Masters, I just want to double-check the menu. Meat balls, cocktail franks, cheese puffs -- is there some reason you don't want your family to handle silverware?
Vanessa: Darling, don't you know? If it's on a toothpick, it's not fattening.
Ruby: Oh Yeah, my Aunt Brandy uses two like chopsticks. She looks like a very heavily made-up praying mantis.
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Charmcaster: I don't understand why you need to steal fairy-godmother's wands. I mean, with all your power.
(Lady Despair chuckles, and reaches over as she's sitting on the floor to sort through wands; and grabs a glass with a bubbling, sizzling, smoking green liquid in it.)
Lady Despair: It isn't enough to simply control the power of Dark Magic. No, to be Truly effective and Monstrously Evil, one needs to control the power of WHITE magic as well. Now see, every living soul in the world has some....some Desperate wish some....secret desire, that they think will improve their miserable lives. With all these, 'goodie-goodie' sticks off the street, and me absorbing their powers. They'll all have to come to me!
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Judge: Miss Masters, I hereby sentence you and Chaz to spend ONE WEEK in a SLUM Motel, to learn the error of BOTH your ways.
Vanessa: (Stands up) Wait a minute...you want ME to spend a WEEK alone with HIM!!?? (points at Chaz incredulously)
Judge: (pleased smile) That's right.
Vanessa: (frightened) But there are BUGS there....AND THEY'LL THINK CHAZ IS THEIR LEADER!!!!
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Vlad Masters: All right, it's a pre-nup.
Vanessa: WADDER! WADLER!! I WALOOWED MY ONGUE!! U WALLOWED MY WONGUE!! *Water, water! I swallowed my tongue. I swallowed my tongue!*
Vlad: Sweetheart, sweetheart just stay calm. My lawyer thought it was important due to my family's estates.
Vanessa: Did you think that just because I sacrificed five years of my life to raise your children so you could go off and achieve criminal financial success that I was gonna hire some barracuda lawyer to take everything you've got so I can retire in the Riviera and go blond!!? Who thinks of such things
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No problem it's an amazing picture.
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Lee: Don't torture yourself, Biffy. That's MY job.
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Vanessa: Same story, girl meets boy, girl loses boy, girl can't remember her address so cab just circles, circles and circles.
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Ma'am are you going to be able to pay this.
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Lee: Vanessa, you promised the Cab Drive a 67 Dollar tip?!?
Vanessa: No, I promised him a $6-$7 Dollar tip! When are these people gonna learn English before coming to America? I'd have less trouble getting around Ecuador!
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Vanessa: No, no, no you can't leave! We've been in this line for two freaking hours! (Vanessa points violently at the clock on the wall and it suddenly explodes)
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Ruby: I was just going pee. Plus it's the DMV. It's full of lines.
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Howard: Well, seeing her blow up that clock sorta made me NOT need to pee anymore...
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Ruby: A girls gotta do what a girls gotta do.
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Kimmie: [about Vanessa] She thinks you're a killer. She even thought you were trying to kill me.
Biffy: Oh, I wouldn't even dream of touching you, like any other normal man.
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Spider-Man: If I was a lesser super hero, I would say something lame like- "Your shows been canceled." But that's not me.
Vanessa: The fact that you thought of it is a cause for concern.
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(Going into the Sorcerer's prison)
Vanessa: It looks like Beetlejuice threw up!
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(Ruby explains why she was kicked out of her Psychology class)
Ruby: I don't know what happened! One moment I was sitting there talking about my assignment and the next I was... trying to unzip his pants with my teeth!
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The Sorcerer has infected the gang with 'THE SEVEN DEADLY SINS!!' Thou, it's really a demon that serves him that's infected them all, and Ruby has been infected by 'LUST.'
Ruby: Luckily I realized what I was doing before I... eww.
Howard: Cunningham, when I told you to charm the pants off of your professor I didn't mean that literally!
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Vanessa: "So, the doctor asks me, 'Do you have any questions?' 'Yes,' I said, 'I have. What position will I be in having this baby?'"
Lee: (cracks a grin)
Vanessa: "And he says, 'The same position as you were when you conceived it!'"
Lee: (giggles)
Vanessa: Oh, for two weeks I thought I was gonna have to stick my legs out the fucking car window again!
Lee: OH!! O.O (falls to floor in laughter)
(Vanessa joins Lee on the floor laughing)
"BEEP BEEP! Mind your horn, you!"
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(So Vanessa goes on a diet…)
- Vanessa: Time for today's sensible meal. (goes into Kitchen where Howard, Ruby, Lee and Biffy are helping to bake cakes and stuff, and V, barely makes it pass them to open the fridge and look inside) Where's my tuna quiche? (Howard looks nervous and stops putting icing on cake.) You heard me! I said where is my tuna quiche? I get five ounces of solid food a day and I want my tuna quiche!
- Howard: You mean that little pie?
- Vanessa: Little pie? Little PIE!?
- Howard: I wanted a snack.
- Vanessa: SNACK!!!!!!?
- Howard: I thought it was a little fishy.
- Vanessa: (Grabs Howard and shakes him.) You ate my sensible meal! You ATE my sensible meal!
- (Ruby, Biffy and Lee rush over to V, Biffy pulling her off Howard and Lee prying Howard loose from the Witch's hands.)
- Ruby: AUNT VANESSA! Stop!
- Biffy: V, you are out of control.
- Vanessa: Oh God, Howard, honey, I'm sorry. What did I just do?
- Howard: (Grabs Vanessa and shakes her) This!
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(Vanessa and Biffy are trapped in an elevator in pitch black.)
Biffy: It's gonna' be okay, Miss Masters. What are you doing?
Vanessa: I'm looking for the emergency phone!
Biffy: That's... not... it...
Vanessa: Oh. Well then, I'd better stop talking into it.
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