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BasilNotes
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# Statistics
Favourites: 282; Deviations: 45; Watchers: 22
Watching: 16; Pageviews: 7234; Comments Made: 502; Friends: 16
# Comments
Comments: 180
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Vanessa: For a second there, I thought I was holding a firemen's hose.
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I'll figure it out at one point. XD
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They hear a loud noise coming from the kitchen. Cut to the kitchen. Ruby is there covered in pieces of watermelon. Lee, Biffy and Howard walk in.
Lee: Ruby?
Howard: Uh, okay, was it a demon?
Ruby: No, it was watermelon!
Biffy: Pussycat, why did you vanquish watermelon?
Ruby: I didn't vanquish watermelon. I threw it up in the air and I tried to freeze it and it exploded.
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Vanessa: you flicked your hands to early. Try again.Â
Lee & Biffy: NOO
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(When Biffy's hacking experiment causes the power to go out on the hottest day of the year)
Biffy: Well, at least the neighbors don't know we're responsible for it...
Guy:Â THEÂ GOLDSTEINSÂ DID THS!!
 (We hear the sounds of a growing Lynch Mob outdoors)
Ruby:Â God, where'd they get the torches and the pitchforks so fast?
Lee:Â Shut up, and put your weight against the door. They're coming in!!
 (They brace themselves against the door as it shuts, but begins to tremble under the force of angry neighbors pounding on it, their pitchforks scratching at the door. Their hands trying to force themselves through the crack in the door, but Taz slaps them sharply with his tail.)
Vanessa: (back against the door, and sneering at Biffy) Well, Desert Fox... Well, Desert Fox, where will you lead us now?
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Seems like something that would happen.
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fav.me/d7zk5qa Vanessa and Aqualad from Young Justice
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www.youtube.com/watch?v=NJaZmP…  A Wendigo is what Vanessa is turning into.
at 0:40
Caline: SHOOT!!
I CAN'T!!
Jaime: Just shoot and pray you hit the right one!!
(Roy aims and shoots, but the red flare instead of hitting V, suddenly stops as she holds up her claws, and everything, except Jaime and Caline are frozen. And the kiss marks on them starts to glow.)
Jaime: Oh my God. She froze it! She froze everything!
Caline: Sorceress of time, remember? We're immune due to her kiss and protection. (She grabs Miss Martian by the shoulder, causing her to unfreeze) Megan!
What happened?
Jaime: (points to Wendigo-V) That one is my Aunt, so the other one is the one who Klarion sicked on her to curse her.
So?
Jaime: So, use your powers to do something!!
9Miss Martian reaches out and telekinetically hurls the flare into the heart of the original Wendigo, it strikes her and time unfreezes as the beast howls in beast voice and screams in female voice, before bursting into dust.)
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She's got a long wooden spoon. XD
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ROFL>
************
Vanessa: I can't remember why I have this....(imagines herself using the wooden spoon to stir the cauldron) Oh! Right.
***********
Ruby: better than a longwooden dildo.
Vanessa: Right, WHO THE HELL HAS A WOODEN DILDO!?
Ruby: Old Timey gold digging travelers heading west in hopes of striking gold?
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Oh my gosh. 
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celestialrainfall.deviantart.c… The best description of Vanessa is usually "Crazy". But here she clears up a misconception
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Please pardon my language but holy schite
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Right? Be sure to leave a comment, celestia needs the attention, and some commissioners.
**********
"I haven't even hit UNSTABLE yet, you'll KNOW when I hit CRAZY, the WORLD will know, and then, there's INSANE> Scared yet?"
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(On the Flume ride)
Bash: Hey! Where's SHE going??
Howard: Sorry everyone! She'll be back shortly! She just needs to fix her bikini top!
Bash: Huh, those knockers are serious! Can't make fun on that
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Do you mind if I use this if I ever get to this chapter?
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Not at all, Riotrebel actually wrote it. so, copy and paste it to her, not that she'd remember. And She'll giv you permission.
**************
"Yes!" Ruby prods a finger into his chest, "You broke down my door, ridiculed my name, and now you’ve puked all over my floor!"
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Ok
******
Howard: Cunningham is so oblivious.Â
Bash: Bash will make her not so obvious by punching all the shoobs! *punches Howard* that's one down.Â
Howard: I hate you.Â
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(In house full of 'Stuffed-Animals' but instead of 'Toys' their Taxidermy animals, Howard is freaking out and running around but Vanessa seems amused by it all)
Vanessa: Hey, Howard, get this guys card! I was thinking cremation, but if he can make this old bat look good, imagine what he can do for me!
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Hey, she slammed herself, it happens.
*************
Howard: GAAAH!! Miss Masters, help me get out of here!!
Vanessa: I a minute, I'm having a staring contest with this owl. (she looks into the eyes of a stuffed owl.)
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Vanessa your poor soul the owl will eat your soul.
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Vanessa: Did you pick up Ruby´s present from Mr. Ping?
Kimmie:Â No. I spent the entire day driving around Greenwich Conneticut looking for that damn jewelery store.
Vanessa: Oh, did I say "Greenwich Conneticut"? I meant Greenwich Village.
Kimmie: That´s ten minutes away, you nitwit!
Vanessa: Then you´d better hurry before they close.
Kimmie: This is ridiculous, I don't why that stupid store doesn´t deliver. (she leaves the house)
Vanessa: (looking at the present which was in her pocket) Oh, they do. I wonder if I can catch her (She walks very slowly towards the door, opens it, and in a very low voice says) Miss McAddams, oh, Miss McAaaaaaadams. (shrugs and shut door)
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Vanessa: I have delved most deeply into the dark and greasy heart of the Ilwrath. And what do you suppose I found there? Well, I had found a torpid, vile, malign, odious, spiteful spirit. Right, no surprises there. What did surprise me though, was what I saw when I regressed into their past lives! It turns out that in their last lives, the Ilwrath were all shining beings of pure light and blissful love. They had reached the pinnacle of spiritual evolution and could go no further.
They were perfection.
Vanessa: And then, somehow they got just a tiny bit better and WHAM, they were all of a sudden totally evil. Wouldn't you know it, get too perfect and you wrap right around to evil. That is why I strive to be perfect, but always do little bad and annoying things to keep from ending up like the Ilwrath.
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(Explaining why there's a fence keeping Cam out of his own hosue.)
Lee: Brandy said and I quote, "If he prefers to spend weeks, months on end at that flesh pit he calls a spa, than with his wife and friends. Then I don't want his Ass anywhere NEAR ME!" End quote.
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(On learning that Serpent lost Ruby, and explains it'll end good. With him, Biffy behind him, and Vanessa standing next to the family's aquarium.)
Serpent: I heard you can drop them off a hundred miles away, and they'll sniff their way home.
Vanessa: Oh, Li Silly, mixed up, possibly minutes to live, Li. I think your confusing Ruby.....WITH A DOG!!!!
(Biffy grabs Serpent by the neck, and dunks his head into the aquarium, legs kicking and arms flailing.)Â
Biffy: WE'RE TALKING ABOUT MY DAUGHTER!!! (pulls Li out of the water, and starts shaking him by his neck.) AND IF YOU PREFER KEEPING THOSE LIMBS, APPENDAGES AND ORIFICES EXACTLY WHERE THEY ARE, YOU'LL FIND HER, PRONTO!!
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Abbey: Oh, Lee, this is terrible. You have been robbed of the most basic sense of security. You know, no matter what else is happening, at the very least I know that when I come home at night you are you, Ty is Ty, and V, if she’s taken her medication is my Great Aunt.
Lee: I don’t know what’s real anymore. When I think of the things I’ve told Biffy –the things he’s told me, the things we’ve told each other, things we’ve said in a restaurant, things we’ve said on our way to a restaurant, things we’ve said on the way home—
Ty: The two of you shared! We get it!
Lee: But who was I sharing with? If you say something to somebody who isn’t really who he is, have you actually said anything or not? And if he’s heard it as someone he really isn’t, has anything you’ve said actually been heard?
Vanessa: *shakes herself alert* Sorry, I wasn’t listening.
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Holgar: Oh,Holfar don’t mind. He's a very patient person. I being to once waited two whole weeks for a sty to go away. Every night, Holgar close his eyes and He'd picture it getting smaller and smaller. And one morning Holgar woke up and it was gone.
(Vanessa is shown leaning against the refrigerator with eyes shut.. Finally noticing her,Lee begins to look worried).
Lee: V, you okay?
Vanessa: (Still with her eyes closed) I’m fine. I’m just trying to make Holgar go away.
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Holgar: Now Friend Lee now how Holgar's friend Mary Jan von Helfenphfelfer felt.
Brandy:: Oh, well, considering what you’ve been through, go ahead, Holgar.
Holgar: She took a vacation to Mexico, and she found this poor, scrawny, helpless little Chihuahua puppy on the street, and she brought it home to St. Olaf with her. And she nurse it back to health. She loved it. She took it to bed with her. She taught it to fetch. She’d throw a ball, and he’d bring it back, and she’d throw a ball and he’d bring it back. Well, Holgar don’t have to tell you that is being pretty much what fetch is. (makes throwing motion)
Vanessa: How much longer are we going to circle the airport, Holg? You want to bring this baby in?
Holgar: Well, when she took the puppy in to get shots, the vet told her the bad news. He said, Mary Jane, this is no Chihuahua. This is a rat.
(Brandy stretches her arms and gives him a sideway glance as Vanessa gives a sideway glance at the others)
Lee: (she looks straight at Holgar for a long time, clasps her hands under her chin) And the point, Aesop?
Holgar:You being to think Biffy was a chihuahua. It turns out he was a rat.
Vanessa: You know, I once prepared a six-course meal with what I thought was chicken. But it turned out to be—
Abbey Archer: AUNT V! (she turns to Lee) Lee, in my heart, I cannot believe that Biffy is a rat. He just fell in with the wrong people, that’s all. Now, look, I know you have a date with him tomorrow night, keep it. I’m sure you’ll fine he’s the same caring, sensitive man you’ve known all along. (turns to Vanessa) My God, it wasn’t my confirmation dinner, was it?!
Vanessa: Your father sure got everyone laughing when he made the little feet dance.
(Abbey grabs her throat looking disgusted.)
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(Randy was hit in the crotch playing baseball)
Sue Ping: You want Grandma to kiss the booboo?
Lee: (to Sue) It's not bad enough I already have one kid in therapy?
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Check this out www.youtube.com/watch?v=vruWm7…
Text adventure, it like, runs on real time. So, you have to consider your actions quickly and so forth.
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Those are some dangerousness situations
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Howard: I woke up this morning, covered in blood and my room was a mess!!
Ruby: ONE: Are you sure it wasn't barbecue sauce? And TWO: Your room is ALWAYS a mess!!
************
Vanessa: I know only ONE cure for the werewolf curse on you, Weinerman!! (There's a explosion of blue sparkly dust behind her, but instead of looking ominous, Vanessa looks embarrassed.) Sorry, I had the Grande Special at the 'Jumping Bean Mexican Restaurant.'Â
Howard: Your farts are blue sparkly clouds of magic!? AWESOME!!
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Oh Howard. You strange strange person.Â
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Biffy: Do you wanna know why I call you Pussycat, Pussycat?
Ruby: Why, Pops? Because you only gave me yarn for Christmas? Because you fed me once and I threw up on the carpet? Because you used to find my hairballs all over the place??
Biffy: No, because I love pussycats, and I love you…(Kisses her on the forehead.) And you were the only one in the family who could catch mice.
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Lee: I've NEVER been more humiliated.
Vanessa: What about the time you lost the keys to your handcuffs, and had to go with biffy to that Computer Stock-holders meeting?
Lee: DON'T try to comfort me, V.
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Vanessa: I once was told I bore a striking resemblence to Miss Cheryl Ladd ... although my bosoms are perkier!
Lee: Not even if you were hanging upside-down on a trapeze!
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Burn. Burn. Vanessa needs ice. XD
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(Biffy and Lee are in the Video Store, they can't decide on a Movie until they see: Butch Cassidey!!)
Lee: Oh, Biffy, now, here's a movie we can agree on. You remember when we were dating, and we saw this at the drive-in during Retro-Cowboy Week?
Biffy: (Leers at her with a dirty grin) I remember that we saw half of it.
Lee: [laughs, mock admonishing him with slap to arm] You know, I still have the imprint of the Honda logo on my back. (Hands on hips looking amused)I can't believe you still have that car.
Biffy: Well, I like to keep a tight hold on things I cherish and love....*Wraps arm around her to pull her in close* And I can't believe I still have you. (The Two then passionately kiss. The Two pull back looking winded.) Wh-where were we, Lee?
Lee: Sharing a tender moment.....thou I did briefly black out.
Biffy: Oh yeah.
Lee: (Presses her breast into his Beefy arm) You remember, how they kicked us out for making too much noise?
Biffy: (Smiles at her, while rubbing at her lower back) Well, you were hurting me, Lee.
Lee: Well, we certainly made up for it that night - in my father's closet! [they both laugh] Oh, Biffy, are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Biffy: (Holds up Dirty movie) Mrs. Assfire?
Lee: (grabs tape and smacks him hard with it) NO!!
Biffy: All right, Butch Cassidy it is.
Lee: Oh good. I heard it had a happy ending.
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