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Description
A full moon looked down inquiringly. The rental car pulled up to the secluded driveway in its own time. The Malones had been waiting for 4 hours with their ‘Welcome Home’ banner ready, now sagged to the ground. Half-asleep, but the oncoming blaring kids’ cassette was enough to shake their stupor. When the music was shut off, Manfred could swear he heard a tiny ‘yay’ from the back.

And out she came. Still with the cigarettes, fishnets and bare midriff. Not the most appropriate dinner attire, but who cares? A recognizable, welcome sight—

“MOM! DAD!!”
And so Mittens bounded over, knocking the parents she both dwarfed and under-shadowed. “I MISSED YOU SOOOOOO MUCH!!”

“We, ULP, figured.” Manfred gasped between rib cracks. “N-nice to see you again!” He had wanted the mystery girl to come out of the car first, just so the suspense could be over and done with. Mother and daughter exchanged their pleasantries, which was made up of pure positive gushing and hush-hush not meant for male ears. They then joined Manfred in watching the red carpet entrance of the car’s other occupant.

The figure (massive) bumped her head getting out, swore (potty mouth) and then waltzed in a bit of a daze (drunkard?) towards the family.

It was if the moon meant to shine down extra illumination upon the figure. A presence like her demanded it. A river of red hair, a prison stripe t-shirt, faded grimy jeans and a leather jacket with studded spikes. She wore a gloomier expression, but the lack of face-paint made no difference.

That was the shark. Now it was Manfred’s turn to whimper.

“So, umm, this is Eurydice… Shark.” Mittens turned with a bow. “My roommate, bandmate in our two-animal band and, well, best friend back in LA.”

“H’lo.” Eury muttered.

AND she’s cranky, Manfred panicked, spinning his head to look for some Bat-Shark Repellent. Even Mary looked a tad taken aback, not shocked or appalled, but mildly flabbergasted. Like when they attended the town’s Wal-Mart opening, and discovered the mayor with the giant siccors had broken in the night before, passing out in a puddle of urine by the Vision Centre.

But still, she was Mary. “Why, hello Eury! What a lovely name, I was just saying that to my husband, you’ve got a name fitting of a muse from Olympus. I’ve trust you’ve been a good muse to my Mittens.” She said this with invisible ellipses.

“Some.” Eury flatly replied. Probably just car lag, Mary thought.

“So, is this… everyone then?” Manfred was so tense that he absent-mindedly forgot to to aim his pipe to his mouth, and projected it into his eyeball instead.

“Oh SHIT!” Mittens sprang back to the car, and 8 seconds later held aloft a ripped carseat containing a rather-green in the gills shark pup wearing a black turtleneck and worn yellow scarf.

“We brought Knashford as well!” She grinned in frozen embarrassment.

Knashford threw up, leaving spittle and half-chewed octopus tentacle on Mary’s bell bottoms.
“Oh, dog.” Manfred turned, expecting to see his wife’s grimacing snout, but it was Eurydice who had groaned.

Mary stood still. She could get upset once in a blue moon, but to watch her just completely blank out was even weirder.

“Oh, he’s ADORRRABLE! How old is he? He’s soooooo cute, I could just eat him up!” I would not be able to tell you which shark looked more horrified.

They all stood by while Mary continued to blow kisses on Ford’s tummy for a good four minutes or so, which just made him spittle more. After a while, Eury broke the semi-silence. “I’m sorry… but could we use your bathroom, like, now?… dehydrated after being in that car all day.”

“Oh, I’m such a dork! Right upstairs in the back!” Mary said as she handed the fish-baby back to his mother.

After the two had gone in with Mary, Manfred turned to his lanky daughter.
“Mittens…”
“Heeeeere it comes. The self-proclaimed libertarian shows his true colors. ‘It’s cool to be a lesbian, as long as you share the same genetics…’”
“That’s not fair’ he mumbled. He expected the backlash; she was still a teen.
“It’s just… well, we don’t know them! And they’ve taught you in schools; the USS Indianapolis… the Jersey attacks in the ‘20s… that shark wrestler …”
“Dad, you’re buzzing out. Sharks get a bad rap. Euro has the worst rap!”
“Doesn’t look like anyone could hurt her back! And-and-and the child-“
“Knashford.”
“D-did you… make… him… with her?”
Her eyes narrowed, then rolled. “No, he’s not mine. He’s a bastard.”
Manfred slunk his already-short arms into his pockets. “That doesn’t much help…”
“Look, we’re all tired and hangry. You’ll feel better about her after dinner.”
“Oh very well…. wait, what’d you say?”
“Hangry. Hungry-angry. I thought it up.”
“Sound like a detergent name. Can’t see that being slang in twenty years.”

……………………….

Hope they don’t mind me lowering their bubble bath inventory, Eury thought as she slid into the oval tub, her extra bulk causing the water level to spill on the floor. There were pictures of technicolor doves and seashells all over the bathroom, the shower curtain had faded peace symbols on it. Wait, was that a Jim Morrison bath mat? She knew the Sixties had been an age of change, but those who embodied it hadn’t seemed to grow up much. Knashford paddled on the other end, quiet but thankful for the life-saving element that was water.

It was hard to make conversation to a 5 year-old whom you rarely saw, and when you did, were too tired and grumpy to build up their social development. But right now, she needed someone with similar genetics to confide in.
“Whaddya think, little sailor? Better than the city?”
“Dunno.”
“Well… what do you think of Mittens’ mommy and daddy?”
“They don’t look like her mommy and daddy. They’re different things.”
“Well, yeah. Mittens is a coywolf, a hybrid. She’s what happens when a wolf and coyote, umm, fall in love.”
“And haf’ sex!”
“Uhh, yeah… they have sex…”
“Who did you hybrid with to make me, mama?”
How was he so innocent yet directly able to make every conversation so cringy?

She tried to steer the conversation back to its origin. “What do you like so far? What would make you like this place?”
“A CINEMA!” Ford squeaked.
“And…?” Eury waved.
“…And it’s quiet. I like quiet.”

Eurydice’s ears perked. It wasn’t totally silent, she could hear cars and near-ramming motorcycles on some highway far off. But, those noises were kinda restrained. No sirens. No coughing drug dealers. Yeah, quiet-ish.
And no gunshots! she realized. And for once in her life, she relaxed.

The door banged open. “HIYA!” Mary hollered “I made sure to do my research! Apparently your genus need a good sodium phosphate intake after a fortnight away from the ocean, so I’ve dug out all my best bath salts and an avocado rub that should get rid of barnacles, remoras, any kind of skin disorder your kind get!”

Eury had been screaming whilst covering her bosom during this entire speech.

“Oh don’t worry, the naked body is a wonderful piece of imagery and should never be held back by any kind of censorship standard. Nice sky-blue hue, by the way!”

Eury started to sink to the tub’s bottom. I wish I could melt into sea-foam and evaporate right now.

“Oh, are you taking a nap? Then I’ll just hang up one of my best dreamcatchers for you then! Sweet dreams!’ And then hung up something containing feathers, marbles and gunk. SHUT! went the door. Eurydice had lived out her nightmares already in childhood, so she threw the dreamcatcher to the ground. Knashford coped his own way by eating a bar of soap.

continued...

Description
A full moon looked down inquiringly. The rental car pulled up to the secluded driveway in its own time. The Malones had been waiting for 4 hours with their ‘Welcome Home’ banner ready, now sagged to the ground. Half-asleep, but the oncoming blaring kids’ cassette was enough to shake their stupor. When the music was shut off, Manfred could swear he heard a tiny ‘yay’ from the back.

And out she came. Still with the cigarettes, fishnets and bare midriff. Not the most appropriate dinner attire, but who cares? A recognizable, welcome sight—

“MOM! DAD!!”
And so Mittens bounded over, knocking the parents she both dwarfed and under-shadowed. “I MISSED YOU SOOOOOO MUCH!!”

“We, ULP, figured.” Manfred gasped between rib cracks. “N-nice to see you again!” He had wanted the mystery girl to come out of the car first, just so the suspense could be over and done with. Mother and daughter exchanged their pleasantries, which was made up of pure positive gushing and hush-hush not meant for male ears. They then joined Manfred in watching the red carpet entrance of the car’s other occupant.

The figure (massive) bumped her head getting out, swore (potty mouth) and then waltzed in a bit of a daze (drunkard?) towards the family.

It was if the moon meant to shine down extra illumination upon the figure. A presence like her demanded it. A river of red hair, a prison stripe t-shirt, faded grimy jeans and a leather jacket with studded spikes. She wore a gloomier expression, but the lack of face-paint made no difference.

That was the shark. Now it was Manfred’s turn to whimper.

“So, umm, this is Eurydice… Shark.” Mittens turned with a bow. “My roommate, bandmate in our two-animal band and, well, best friend back in LA.”

“H’lo.” Eury muttered.

AND she’s cranky, Manfred panicked, spinning his head to look for some Bat-Shark Repellent. Even Mary looked a tad taken aback, not shocked or appalled, but mildly flabbergasted. Like when they attended the town’s Wal-Mart opening, and discovered the mayor with the giant siccors had broken in the night before, passing out in a puddle of urine by the Vision Centre.

But still, she was Mary. “Why, hello Eury! What a lovely name, I was just saying that to my husband, you’ve got a name fitting of a muse from Olympus. I’ve trust you’ve been a good muse to my Mittens.” She said this with invisible ellipses.

“Some.” Eury flatly replied. Probably just car lag, Mary thought.

“So, is this… everyone then?” Manfred was so tense that he absent-mindedly forgot to to aim his pipe to his mouth, and projected it into his eyeball instead.

“Oh SHIT!” Mittens sprang back to the car, and 8 seconds later held aloft a ripped carseat containing a rather-green in the gills shark pup wearing a black turtleneck and worn yellow scarf.

“We brought Knashford as well!” She grinned in frozen embarrassment.

Knashford threw up, leaving spittle and half-chewed octopus tentacle on Mary’s bell bottoms.
“Oh, dog.” Manfred turned, expecting to see his wife’s grimacing snout, but it was Eurydice who had groaned.

Mary stood still. She could get upset once in a blue moon, but to watch her just completely blank out was even weirder.

“Oh, he’s ADORRRABLE! How old is he? He’s soooooo cute, I could just eat him up!” I would not be able to tell you which shark looked more horrified.

They all stood by while Mary continued to blow kisses on Ford’s tummy for a good four minutes or so, which just made him spittle more. After a while, Eury broke the semi-silence. “I’m sorry… but could we use your bathroom, like, now?… dehydrated after being in that car all day.”

“Oh, I’m such a dork! Right upstairs in the back!” Mary said as she handed the fish-baby back to his mother.

After the two had gone in with Mary, Manfred turned to his lanky daughter.
“Mittens…”
“Heeeeere it comes. The self-proclaimed libertarian shows his true colors. ‘It’s cool to be a lesbian, as long as you share the same genetics…’”
“That’s not fair’ he mumbled. He expected the backlash; she was still a teen.
“It’s just… well, we don’t know them! And they’ve taught you in schools; the USS Indianapolis… the Jersey attacks in the ‘20s… that shark wrestler …”
“Dad, you’re buzzing out. Sharks get a bad rap. Euro has the worst rap!”
“Doesn’t look like anyone could hurt her back! And-and-and the child-“
“Knashford.”
“D-did you… make… him… with her?”
Her eyes narrowed, then rolled. “No, he’s not mine. He’s a bastard.”
Manfred slunk his already-short arms into his pockets. “That doesn’t much help…”
“Look, we’re all tired and hangry. You’ll feel better about her after dinner.”
“Oh very well…. wait, what’d you say?”
“Hangry. Hungry-angry. I thought it up.”
“Sound like a detergent name. Can’t see that being slang in twenty years.”

……………………….

Hope they don’t mind me lowering their bubble bath inventory, Eury thought as she slid into the oval tub, her extra bulk causing the water level to spill on the floor. There were pictures of technicolor doves and seashells all over the bathroom, the shower curtain had faded peace symbols on it. Wait, was that a Jim Morrison bath mat? She knew the Sixties had been an age of change, but those who embodied it hadn’t seemed to grow up much. Knashford paddled on the other end, quiet but thankful for the life-saving element that was water.

It was hard to make conversation to a 5 year-old whom you rarely saw, and when you did, were too tired and grumpy to build up their social development. But right now, she needed someone with similar genetics to confide in.
“Whaddya think, little sailor? Better than the city?”
“Dunno.”
“Well… what do you think of Mittens’ mommy and daddy?”
“They don’t look like her mommy and daddy. They’re different things.”
“Well, yeah. Mittens is a coywolf, a hybrid. She’s what happens when a wolf and coyote, umm, fall in love.”
“And haf’ sex!”
“Uhh, yeah… they have sex…”
“Who did you hybrid with to make me, mama?”
How was he so innocent yet directly able to make every conversation so cringy?

She tried to steer the conversation back to its origin. “What do you like so far? What would make you like this place?”
“A CINEMA!” Ford squeaked.
“And…?” Eury waved.
“…And it’s quiet. I like quiet.”

Eurydice’s ears perked. It wasn’t totally silent, she could hear cars and near-ramming motorcycles on some highway far off. But, those noises were kinda restrained. No sirens. No coughing drug dealers. Yeah, quiet-ish.
And no gunshots! she realized. And for once in her life, she relaxed.

The door banged open. “HIYA!” Mary hollered “I made sure to do my research! Apparently your genus need a good sodium phosphate intake after a fortnight away from the ocean, so I’ve dug out all my best bath salts and an avocado rub that should get rid of barnacles, remoras, any kind of skin disorder your kind get!”

Eury had been screaming whilst covering her bosom during this entire speech.

“Oh don’t worry, the naked body is a wonderful piece of imagery and should never be held back by any kind of censorship standard. Nice sky-blue hue, by the way!”

Eury started to sink to the tub’s bottom. I wish I could melt into sea-foam and evaporate right now.

“Oh, are you taking a nap? Then I’ll just hang up one of my best dreamcatchers for you then! Sweet dreams!’ And then hung up something containing feathers, marbles and gunk. SHUT! went the door. Eurydice had lived out her nightmares already in childhood, so she threw the dreamcatcher to the ground. Knashford coped his own way by eating a bar of soap.

continued...