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chasingcomets — Touch

Published: 2003-08-06 01:15:39 +0000 UTC; Views: 186; Favourites: 0; Downloads: 36
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Description I put this up for workshop, and did not recieve helpful comments. Most told me what was wrong in general, but not exactly where to correct it. Therefore, I have made a few tiny changes, and leave it for your review. Help is appreciated, as I do not feel that this is complete.
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Comments: 5

lockedinside [2003-12-03 08:50:54 +0000 UTC]

its interesting, sorry i guess i shouldnt be making any comments when i'm tired as hell and my eyes and head hurt from crying too much, anyways
I like it, like i said its interesting
the last part for the most part

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

deathjanissary [2003-08-14 01:22:28 +0000 UTC]

It has a lot of feeling in it.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

sweetkitten [2003-08-13 16:52:18 +0000 UTC]

Not quite sure I get it, but it flows nicely. What I would suggest is that you mix in some more poetic words... maybe more descriptive words. Just my suggestions though. Nicely done.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

orne [2003-08-13 16:32:48 +0000 UTC]

.....KINKY!

<-OrNe-<

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

elainemarley [2003-08-13 16:31:42 +0000 UTC]

I like it! It flows very nicely and it's very sweet. Check out my poetry too [link]

👍: 0 ⏩: 0