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When A Weasel and A Cat Kiss…

Chapter 2
Akuen

"The age-old story of how girl meets boy" is not always true.

For this situation, it was more like "boy captures girl, boy accidentally kisses girl, girl falls in love, and leader gets angry."

())~%~~

"I've… never heard of this village before…" he mumbled.

"Oh yeah? ANBU didn't even know? Well, it doesn't matter. This village is history as soon as we catch this seven-tailed jinchuuriki. Leader doesn't want a petty village in our way for world domination." The shark really was talkative.

Uchiha Itachi wished the leader would pair him with someone different.

Two years ago he joined the Akatsuki, and starting two years ago, Hoshigake Kisame wouldn't stop talking.

He had given the Uchiha countless reasons to kill himself already.

"Let's just go." the stoic little fifteen-year-old sighed.

The two were standing outside Kigakure's gates. Nothing spectacular to look at, not like Konoha's gates.

It was just a small arch, no doors, overlooking the village with the symbol on top--a simple vertical line with leaves on the bottom; kind of like a child's unfinished drawing of a flower stem. Fitting for such a tiny village.

As Itachi proceeded to walk wearily through the gate, a blur of green jumped in front of him and kicked him hard in the chest. He went flying into a tree.

Then, in an instant, the blur was at Kisame's front.

"You little--!"

TING! A deafening sound as a kunai clashed with Samehada.

The blur stopped long enough for Uchiha to see a flash of blonde hair before it disappeared in a cloud of smoke with a log in its place.

A rustle in the tree behind him and a battle cry, and the blur was aiming a kick at Kisame.

The shark sidestepped and swung Samehada, but the green blur was a little too fast. It did a back flip and charged at Kisame while he was recovering from that massive slash that threw him off-balance when he missed.

Kunai in hand, the blur aimed at Kisame's throat.

Itachi caught its wrist and flung it back against another tree that splintered upon impact. In the process, the kunai slipped and blood splattered the grass.

Now in the place of the green blur was a bleeding kunoichi with a nasty gash on her arm.

())~%~~

Kunoichi's POV

Akatsuki in the village? How come? Because of the Nanabi? Ahh… And I've been sent to stall… because everyone hates me.

Stupid council.

They'll probably have an all-out celebration when I'm dead. Jerks.

I quieted what little chakra I had--I had no use for chakra--and landed in a tree nearby the gate to the village to await their arrival.

I was not a moment too soon, for two suspicious-looking men in black cloaks appeared shortly.

One was… blue. A shark, with sharp teeth, and was that… gills?

The other was short compared to his monster of a partner. He had long black hair that was tied back in a low ponytail.

And I've never seen eyes more beautiful.

They were onyx orbs, full of dark emotion, although his facial features showed none.

I got lost in those eyes until he approached the gate. Then, I remembered my mission. I was in front of him in a second and Onyx Eyes was against a tree the next. Whoa, I got lucky.

That left him dazed long enough for me to go for his partner, the shark with the giant bandaged sword. Wonderful.

"You little--!" Sharky blocked my kunai with one swing of his sword. I noticed his ravenous look when I rebounded from the collision. Oh Kami.

A quick substitution jutsu and a cloud of smoke left him grinning wildly… at me? He noticed my position in the tree Onyx Eyes was against.

"KYAAA!" I pounced and aimed a shaky kick at Sharky. Despite his looming structure, he sidestepped my kick and slashed with that bulk of a sword.

I barely dodged with a back flip, losing an inch of my hair. I got my kunai ready for a second attack; Sharky looked as though that last swing knocked him off-balance--the perfect opening.

I went into a full-on charge going for a vital point in the throat. When something caught my wrist. Onyx Eyes.

He threw me unnecessarily hard at another tree, causing me to lose my grip on the knife. As it fell, the kunai made a deep cut in my forearm.

I slammed against the tree, cracking it, and staining it with blood.

())~%~~

Kunoichi's POV

"Heh. Cute little kunoichi… thinkin' she can take on two Akatsuki at once…" Sharky smirked as he strolled over to me.

Onyx Eyes just stood where he was, staring at my arm that was uncontrollably oozing hot red liquid. His eyes betrayed his composed face and whispered the words I'm sorry.

"What's your name, girl?" The shark asked. I was hesitant to answer. These were Akatsuki. If they found out who I was…

"Did you not hear me, girl? What's your name?" Sharky tapped my foot with his, leaning down a bit to come to my eye level of sitting on the ground. I shrank a couple inches when I saw him up close.

"Y-Yumiko…" I said in a strained voice the was almost a whisper. He snickered at that and stood straight again, walking to the other side of the tree to lean against it. Onyx Eyes was still looking at me, motionless.

"Yumiko, how old are you?"

"…fourteen." I answered. Now there was some movement from Onyx Eyes. A light shade of red dusted his face as he adverted his gaze from me. He took a half step back.

"Ha ha hah!" The shark boomed as he eyed his comrade, "Itachi-san, hear that?" Onyx Eyes was shuffling from foot to foot now, finding the ground very interesting as his whole face turned red and his eyebrows furrowed together.

I needed to get out of there soon.

())~%~~

Nobody's POV

Kisame found this whole thing rather amusing. Itachi had never shown emotion before. 'Maybe the guy does have a heart,' he thought as he laughed out loud.

Itachi was burning with anger at his partner. Now he had countless-and-one reasons to become suicidal. Then again, she was kind of cute…

Kisame shakily got up from his position behind the tree Yumiko was behind and stalked over to her, still laughing. The shark composed himself enough to replace Samehada on his back and take the kunoichi by the arm. He yanked her to her feet and looked her up and down.

"Itachi-saaaaan," he giggled in a sing-song voice, "she's pretty cuuuute!" Kisame bumped Yumiko towards the 'apathetic' adolescent, a little harder than expected. The kunoichi crashed into Itachi, knocking them both to the ground and staining him with blood.

The position they were in caused them both to blush wildly, only making Kisame shake with laughter. The shark stumbled toward the two like a drunken man as Itachi pushed Yumiko off of him.

Kisame caught the girl and again elbowed her.

This time into Itachi's lips. Kisame almost laughed himself to death. This would be a great story to tell the rest of the organization. If he ever lived to see them again.

He looked over to the fifteen-year-old through tearing eyes--he was still laughing--to see what his fate would be. To the former Mist-ninja's shock, Itachi wasn't glaring daggers at him. He didn't pull away from the kiss.

"Eh… Itachi-san?" Kisame re-collected himself and now just stared on, confused. As if he didn't exist, the two young ninja went on kissing, until Yumiko remembered where she was.

Her eyes flew open and she pulled away from Itachi's grasp. Beat-red--half from blushing and half from bleeding--and embarrassed, she hastily stood and put some distance between her and the former Konoha-ninja.

"S-s-sorry!" Yumiko retreated further but was tripped by Kisame. A face plant into the grass left her helpless as Itachi got up and walked towards her. The shark was in suspense.

Smirking, the teen gently took her by the waist and tugged her to her feet, "For what?" Yumiko blushed, and Kisame hid a growing smile.

The moment was interrupted by a small paper bird that landed in front of the taller Akatsuki. It chirped three times, a signal that Leader-sama wanted everyone to gather.

())~%~~

"Ugh, how come those two can't do anything right?" Pein mumbled to himself as all eight figures materialized in their hologram form.

As the last two came into view--the tallest and the youngest--he asked a question that always seemed to dissatisfy him when he heard the reply: "Find it yet?"

"Ahh, no. I still don't know what the meaning of life is. I've asked everyone, but--Oh you mean the jinchuuriki!" Pein looked at Kisame, infuriated. There were eruptions of giggles at the joke. Who says the Akatsuki don't know how to have fun?

"No, we didn't. We were…intercepted." Itachi answered. Kisame laughed. Pein looked like he wanted to kill the next person who gave him bad news.

"I specifically told you both that the village knew we were coming and to act fast so they couldn't evacuate." Pein said through gritted teeth, "Who the hell stopped you from getting to the target in time?"

"…"

"A…kunoichi." The leader looked dumbfounded. Hidan burst into laughter and Konan looked smug.

"You can't be serious…" Pein rolled his eyes and face palmed his psyche. He couldn't believe that his two best members slipped up because of just one kunoichi.

"Ahh, wait! There was a good reason! Itachi-san got his--"

"Kisame!" the fifteen-year-old glared at him.

"…"

"--first kiss!" Now everyone broke out into laughter, Hidan was on his knees, clutching his stomach. Itachi shot Kisame a death glare. A guarantee that he was to die in the Tsukuyomi Realm.

Pein looked completely pissed-off. They missed a jinchuuriki because of some stupid, overrated emotions. Hidan calmed himself enough to ask an unnecessary question: "What's her name?"

"Yumiko!" The shark replied. Itachi's sharingan was activated.

Pein's eyes widened. "Wait… Yumiko? A blonde? Green eyes?" --Kisame nodded-- "Idiot! She's a jinchuuriki! The hachibi! Capture her! Now!" He ordered frantically, and everyone quieted down. Kisame nodded again, and the tall hologram was a blur as it faded out.

'Are you kidding me?' Itachi ranted in his head. It was his turn to be pissed-off.

Pein signaled for everyone else to go, then called for the love-sick teen to wait. "Don't let emotions get the best of you, Itachi-san. Especially not with the jinchuuriki."

The hologram faded, and Itachi was alone. "Dammit."

())~%~~

Itachi opened his eyes and looked up from his spot on the ground. Kisame already had Yumiko slung over his shoulder with her hands and feet tied. She was trying desperately to wriggle out of his grasp.

The shark grinned down at him. The youngest member let out a sigh and stood, heading towards the Akatsuki base. Kisame followed.

Chapter 2~End