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Description
First, have a link
Second, an icon story about ships. It’s a metaphor.
Third,

THIS IS GONNA BE A LONG ONE CHILDREN!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Who needs fanfics when you have icon stories?~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*In the middle of the Specific Pacific Ocean Lake *
I can’t believe our ship just sunk…
I can’t believe it…all those people…dead…
But hey at least we’re alive!!
IKE! THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE DIED!
BUT WE’RE ALIVE AND THAT’S ALL THAT MATTERS! And look! The Gods have blessed us with this cool raft.

You know there’s room on that thing for the both of us…
SCREW YOU I FOUND THIS RAFT! IT’S MINE!
WE FOUND IT TOGETHER! AND BEING THE GENTLEMAN YOU ARE, YOU WILL LET ME ON THE RAFT ALSO!
Chivalry is dead, and I will be too before I LET YOU ON HERE!
MOVE YOUR FATASS OFF THE RAFT AND LET MY GLORIOUS ASS ON! (shoves Ike off raft)
HELP I CAN’T SWIM! MY HUUUUUUGE MUSCLES ARE WEIGHING ME DOWN
Are you serious, Ike? Do you think I’ll fall for that.

Come on Ike, just get on the raft.

Oh no…
…
…
I told you I’ll be dead before I let you on the raft!
HOLY RAPTOR JESUS–!!! (falls off raft)
BAHAHAHAHA! AS IF I’M GOING TO BE A +1 TO THE DEATH POOL! (more laughter)
IKE! YOU DICK SANDWICH! I THOUGHT YOU DIED!
Silly blueberry muffin, haven’t you learned in math class that Muscles are sea creatures, therefore they can float.
I HAVE MEAT FLOATIES ON MY ARMS!
….If you’re done having a monologue, can you help me onto the raft.
I don’t wanna.
But why!?
Because my burning hatred for sharing my nachos has spread and has caused me to hate sharing anything that I call my own.
IKE WE SHARE A ROOM!
……oh yeah….
HA! I just put a hole through your already faulty logic!
NOW LET ME ON THE RAFT!
FINE JEEZ

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Several hours later~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

…Ike….
…Yeah….
….Am I dead yet…?
…Lemme check…
(checks pulse)
…Maybe….
…good…
…Hey Marth…
…What…?
…Am I dead yet…?
….I sure hope so…
….rude….

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Several more hours later~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ikeeeeeee, I’m hungry.
Then eat my ass…
What?
What?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Many more hours later~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ike…tell me I’m hallucinating, but–
You’re hallucinating.
That’s not what I…

…Anyways, am I hallucinating or is that Roy over there.
The Koopa? Cause all I see is the red headed fire cracker.
That’s who I meant-WAIT YOU SEE HIM TOO!?
Marth, do you see how wide open my eyes are, how could I not see him????
I DON’T KNOW MAYBE IT’S BECAUSE YOU’RE AN IDIOT 143% OF THE TIME!
THOSE NUMBERS DON’T MAKE SENSE!
IT MEANS YOU’RE ENOUGH IDIOT FOR THE BOTH OF US!
I’m surprised after all these years, your betch supply has never run low.
WHAT’S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN!
GOSH! YOU GUYS ARE LOUD!
But if it weren’t for Marth’s high pitched voice, I never would’ve found you!
HA! It’s all thanks to me we got fou-
MY VOICE IS NOT THAT HIGH!
(seagull noises)
Your high pitched mating call has just summoned my dinner!
MY VOICE IS NOT THAT HIGH!
(SEAGULL NOISES INTENSIFY)
DADDY’S EATING GOOD TONIGHT!
IKE YOU’RE NOT GOING TO EAT THOSE BIRDS!
You’re right, Roy, I’m not going to eat these birds….RAW AT LEAST! (grabs Roy)
USE YOUR FIRE POWERS AND ROAST ME SOME OF THIS PHEASANT!
GET THESE FILTHY SKY RATS AWAY FROM MY HAIR!
(SEAGULL NOISES REACH MAXIMUM VELOCITY)
THEY’RE ATTACKING MY BOAT!
ROY, USE FLAMETHROWER TO SUBDUE THE AGGRESSIVE SEAGULLS!
PIKACHUUUUUU!! (Seagulls catch fire and fall onto Roy’s boat)
MY BOAT!!
I didn’t really think that one through…
You dingus…
(Roy’s boat disintegrates)
HELP! MY HUGE MUSCLES ARE WEIGHING ME DOWN!
I’M NOT FALLING FOR THAT TWICE!
You’re no fun-GGLJKJGLGKJDFJJFHBJASDKALFBVLKDASDKALSHDJAHLJSDH
IKE! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?
(holding Roy’s head underwater) HIS BOAT’S GONE! HE’S GOT NOWHERE TO GO BUT ON THE RAFT, AND THERE’S NO ROOM ON THIS THING FOR ALL THREE OF US!
BSAKLDDABDJSAHDEIOAIDHSKJHFJAKSDASDDHUFIP
AND IF HE’S DEAD, WE CAN EAT HIS DEAD BODY FOR SUSTENANCE!
YOU’RE GOING TO EAT HIM!?
IT’S CALLED SURVIVAL OF THE FITTEST! IT’S EITHER WE EAT HIM OR HE EATS US!
UFIACJSLNEILUEFACFDAJKNUIFEUIAHFAUSCSFLLUIWLHIAUDF
IKE! WE’RE SURROUNDED BY ROASTED SEAGULLS! WE CAN JUST EAT THOSE!
Oh! You’re right. (Stops drowning Roy)
(GASP)
YOU WERE GOING TO KILL ME AND EAT ME!?!?!
COME ON MAN! YOU’D DO THE SAME TO ME IF YOU HAD TO!
You’re right!

…
IF YOU TWO ARE DONE! HOW ARE WE GONNA GET BACK TO SHORE NOW THAT ROY’S BOAT IS GONE!? BECAUSE IF YOU HAVEN’T REALIZED WE ARE STILL STRANDED ON THIS STUPID RAFT SURROUNDED BY DEAD BIRDS!
Ah, but since we have these birds, we’ll be able to survive a few days out here and by then we’ll be rescued.
WHAT ABOUT WATER!? WE CAN’T LIVE WITHOUT WATER!
Marth, we’re never out of water! Just look around you!

Drinking sea water is...not healthy...cause...you know...pee
(gently drinking sea water) Oh Marth, didn't you know, stranded people drink their own pee to survive.
WHEN THEY'RE STRANDED IN A DESERT!
We're stranded in a desert of water!
...Do you even know what a desert is?
NOPE!
GOOD LORD! (Scoots away in anger)
Is he gonna be alright.
Let him have his alone time. By the way Roy, how did you know we were out here?
Well! I was watching good ol' 'Olimar and Jerome' on television when the breaking news popped up saying that the "Titanic 2.0" sank. And I remembered you guys left to go on a cruise to the Bahamas!
Our ship was called the Titanic 2.0!? No wonder it sank!
Did you even read the ticket I gave you!?
You know I don't like reading things unless it's a nutritional label.
Since when do you worry about your diet?
Ever since my favorite protein shake went out of business.
Was it Ryu's 'Rugged and Ready?'
Yeah. They got sued for putting real rocks in it. However, it brought uniqueness to the table that other protein shakes failed to even measure up to the manliness in the drink. It had a sort of tingle to it when it touched your tongue.
.....Those must've been sharp rocks.
SHARP ROCKS EQUAL A SHARP MIND!
.....it sure does....
Roy, does anyone know you came out here?
NOPE!
AND WHY NOT!?
Because I didn't tell them!
WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL THEM!
I DON'T KNOW~!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA--

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~The next day~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

--AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
(gasping) Alright....I'm done. (faints)
(biting into a seagull) That must be some new record.
(drinking some sea water) Yeah, that lasted like 6 hours or something.
And look he summoned more seagulls.
SQUAW!
Roy, you know what you must do.
(evil laughter and squawking)
Yes, my pretties. Burn. BURN!

SQUAAAAAAAAA

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~A few hours later~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ugh, Ike, I had the most horrendous dream. We were on a ship but it sank and then I was trapped on a raft with you and you told me to eat your ass and-
OH GOD IT WAS REAL!
YOU ATE IKE'S ASS?
NOT MY ASS! (checks ass)
Wait. It's still there.
You lied to me.
Do you two even know what that means!?
Yes, it means you're going to consume my delicious, meaty butt cheeks to replenish your demonic fish powers.
How much of that water did you drink?
NOT ENOUGH!
....I'm hungry...
STAY AWAY FROM MY ASS!
YOU SICK MAN, JUST GIVE ME ONE OF THOSE SEAGULLS!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~A few more hours later~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Are we there yet?
No.
Are we there yet?
No.
Are we there yet?
No.
Are we there ye--
WHAT EVEN IS 'THERE!?' IS THERE SOMEWHERE SPECIFIC YOU WANT TO BE!?
Yes there is.
...
...
HOME! (gross sobbing)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~A few few more hours later~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ike, your stubble is coming out again.
It's been, like what, 5 days since I've shaved.
At least I have something to rub when I'm deep in thought about how we're gonna die.
When people find us, they'll think we've been out here for years because of your beard!
I much prefer the stubble, full on beards freak me out.
AND I MUCH PREFER WE NOT STAY OUT HERE FOR YEARS!
Ike, will your beard keep me warm at night?
I will not let my friends be devoured by the coldness of night. Roy, cuddle my face!
YAY! (embraces Ike's face)
Marth, join us in the warmth of my facial hair.
OH MY GOSH!
No.
ALL I DO IS LOVE YOU AND THIS IS HOW YOU REPAY ME! CUDDLE MY FACE!
I AM GOING NOWHERE NEAR YOUR FACE! I'M GOING TO STAY IN MY COLD CORNER!
THEN I'M GOING OVER TO YOU!
STAY AWAY FROM ME, YOU HAIRY BEAST! AH- (falls out of boat onto...land?)
Sand. S-sand!? WE'VE REACHED SHORE! OH THANK PALUTENA AND HOWEVER MANY MORE GODS AND GODDESSES THERE ARE! I STOPPED CARING! SWEET GLORIOUS LAND HOW I'VE MISSED YOU! (kisses ground and a beach crab)

WE'RE GONNA LIVE! YES! OH GOODNESS YES!
Save the celebrations, Marth. Where are we anyway? It looks like we're on an island.
A DESERTED ISLAND! THIS ISN'T HOME! AND NO MATTER HOW MANY TIMES I CLACK MY HEELS WE'RE STILL HERE! (furious clacking)
Were you wearing those the whole time?
YES I WAS!
But...you know what...I should just stop asking.
Well, we're on land now, but we're still stranded. So now what?

TO BE CONTINUED

THAT MEANS THERE IS GOING TO BE MORE????
Okay enough with my antics.
It has been like what 3-4 years?
I'm not coming back, I hope you know that....
Ehhhhhh we'll let fate decide.

Characters do not belong to me~
Art and ridiculous icon story belong to the one and only

Description
First, have a link
Second, an icon story about ships. It’s a metaphor.
Third,

THIS IS GONNA BE A LONG ONE CHILDREN!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Who needs fanfics when you have icon stories?~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*In the middle of the Specific Pacific Ocean Lake *
I can’t believe our ship just sunk…
I can’t believe it…all those people…dead…
But hey at least we’re alive!!
IKE! THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE DIED!
BUT WE’RE ALIVE AND THAT’S ALL THAT MATTERS! And look! The Gods have blessed us with this cool raft.

You know there’s room on that thing for the both of us…
SCREW YOU I FOUND THIS RAFT! IT’S MINE!
WE FOUND IT TOGETHER! AND BEING THE GENTLEMAN YOU ARE, YOU WILL LET ME ON THE RAFT ALSO!
Chivalry is dead, and I will be too before I LET YOU ON HERE!
MOVE YOUR FATASS OFF THE RAFT AND LET MY GLORIOUS ASS ON! (shoves Ike off raft)
HELP I CAN’T SWIM! MY HUUUUUUGE MUSCLES ARE WEIGHING ME DOWN
Are you serious, Ike? Do you think I’ll fall for that.

Come on Ike, just get on the raft.

Oh no…
…
…
I told you I’ll be dead before I let you on the raft!
HOLY RAPTOR JESUS–!!! (falls off raft)
BAHAHAHAHA! AS IF I’M GOING TO BE A +1 TO THE DEATH POOL! (more laughter)
IKE! YOU DICK SANDWICH! I THOUGHT YOU DIED!
Silly blueberry muffin, haven’t you learned in math class that Muscles are sea creatures, therefore they can float.
I HAVE MEAT FLOATIES ON MY ARMS!
….If you’re done having a monologue, can you help me onto the raft.
I don’t wanna.
But why!?
Because my burning hatred for sharing my nachos has spread and has caused me to hate sharing anything that I call my own.
IKE WE SHARE A ROOM!
……oh yeah….
HA! I just put a hole through your already faulty logic!
NOW LET ME ON THE RAFT!
FINE JEEZ

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Several hours later~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

…Ike….
…Yeah….
….Am I dead yet…?
…Lemme check…
(checks pulse)
…Maybe….
…good…
…Hey Marth…
…What…?
…Am I dead yet…?
….I sure hope so…
….rude….

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Several more hours later~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ikeeeeeee, I’m hungry.
Then eat my ass…
What?
What?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Many more hours later~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ike…tell me I’m hallucinating, but–
You’re hallucinating.
That’s not what I…

…Anyways, am I hallucinating or is that Roy over there.
The Koopa? Cause all I see is the red headed fire cracker.
That’s who I meant-WAIT YOU SEE HIM TOO!?
Marth, do you see how wide open my eyes are, how could I not see him????
I DON’T KNOW MAYBE IT’S BECAUSE YOU’RE AN IDIOT 143% OF THE TIME!
THOSE NUMBERS DON’T MAKE SENSE!
IT MEANS YOU’RE ENOUGH IDIOT FOR THE BOTH OF US!
I’m surprised after all these years, your betch supply has never run low.
WHAT’S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN!
GOSH! YOU GUYS ARE LOUD!
But if it weren’t for Marth’s high pitched voice, I never would’ve found you!
HA! It’s all thanks to me we got fou-
MY VOICE IS NOT THAT HIGH!
(seagull noises)
Your high pitched mating call has just summoned my dinner!
MY VOICE IS NOT THAT HIGH!
(SEAGULL NOISES INTENSIFY)
DADDY’S EATING GOOD TONIGHT!
IKE YOU’RE NOT GOING TO EAT THOSE BIRDS!
You’re right, Roy, I’m not going to eat these birds….RAW AT LEAST! (grabs Roy)
USE YOUR FIRE POWERS AND ROAST ME SOME OF THIS PHEASANT!
GET THESE FILTHY SKY RATS AWAY FROM MY HAIR!
(SEAGULL NOISES REACH MAXIMUM VELOCITY)
THEY’RE ATTACKING MY BOAT!
ROY, USE FLAMETHROWER TO SUBDUE THE AGGRESSIVE SEAGULLS!
PIKACHUUUUUU!! (Seagulls catch fire and fall onto Roy’s boat)
MY BOAT!!
I didn’t really think that one through…
You dingus…
(Roy’s boat disintegrates)
HELP! MY HUGE MUSCLES ARE WEIGHING ME DOWN!
I’M NOT FALLING FOR THAT TWICE!
You’re no fun-GGLJKJGLGKJDFJJFHBJASDKALFBVLKDASDKALSHDJAHLJSDH
IKE! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?
(holding Roy’s head underwater) HIS BOAT’S GONE! HE’S GOT NOWHERE TO GO BUT ON THE RAFT, AND THERE’S NO ROOM ON THIS THING FOR ALL THREE OF US!
BSAKLDDABDJSAHDEIOAIDHSKJHFJAKSDASDDHUFIP
AND IF HE’S DEAD, WE CAN EAT HIS DEAD BODY FOR SUSTENANCE!
YOU’RE GOING TO EAT HIM!?
IT’S CALLED SURVIVAL OF THE FITTEST! IT’S EITHER WE EAT HIM OR HE EATS US!
UFIACJSLNEILUEFACFDAJKNUIFEUIAHFAUSCSFLLUIWLHIAUDF
IKE! WE’RE SURROUNDED BY ROASTED SEAGULLS! WE CAN JUST EAT THOSE!
Oh! You’re right. (Stops drowning Roy)
(GASP)
YOU WERE GOING TO KILL ME AND EAT ME!?!?!
COME ON MAN! YOU’D DO THE SAME TO ME IF YOU HAD TO!
You’re right!

…
IF YOU TWO ARE DONE! HOW ARE WE GONNA GET BACK TO SHORE NOW THAT ROY’S BOAT IS GONE!? BECAUSE IF YOU HAVEN’T REALIZED WE ARE STILL STRANDED ON THIS STUPID RAFT SURROUNDED BY DEAD BIRDS!
Ah, but since we have these birds, we’ll be able to survive a few days out here and by then we’ll be rescued.
WHAT ABOUT WATER!? WE CAN’T LIVE WITHOUT WATER!
Marth, we’re never out of water! Just look around you!

Drinking sea water is...not healthy...cause...you know...pee
(gently drinking sea water) Oh Marth, didn't you know, stranded people drink their own pee to survive.
WHEN THEY'RE STRANDED IN A DESERT!
We're stranded in a desert of water!
...Do you even know what a desert is?
NOPE!
GOOD LORD! (Scoots away in anger)
Is he gonna be alright.
Let him have his alone time. By the way Roy, how did you know we were out here?
Well! I was watching good ol' 'Olimar and Jerome' on television when the breaking news popped up saying that the "Titanic 2.0" sank. And I remembered you guys left to go on a cruise to the Bahamas!
Our ship was called the Titanic 2.0!? No wonder it sank!
Did you even read the ticket I gave you!?
You know I don't like reading things unless it's a nutritional label.
Since when do you worry about your diet?
Ever since my favorite protein shake went out of business.
Was it Ryu's 'Rugged and Ready?'
Yeah. They got sued for putting real rocks in it. However, it brought uniqueness to the table that other protein shakes failed to even measure up to the manliness in the drink. It had a sort of tingle to it when it touched your tongue.
.....Those must've been sharp rocks.
SHARP ROCKS EQUAL A SHARP MIND!
.....it sure does....
Roy, does anyone know you came out here?
NOPE!
AND WHY NOT!?
Because I didn't tell them!
WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL THEM!
I DON'T KNOW~!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA--

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~The next day~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

--AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
(gasping) Alright....I'm done. (faints)
(biting into a seagull) That must be some new record.
(drinking some sea water) Yeah, that lasted like 6 hours or something.
And look he summoned more seagulls.
SQUAW!
Roy, you know what you must do.
(evil laughter and squawking)
Yes, my pretties. Burn. BURN!

SQUAAAAAAAAA

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~A few hours later~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ugh, Ike, I had the most horrendous dream. We were on a ship but it sank and then I was trapped on a raft with you and you told me to eat your ass and-
OH GOD IT WAS REAL!
YOU ATE IKE'S ASS?
NOT MY ASS! (checks ass)
Wait. It's still there.
You lied to me.
Do you two even know what that means!?
Yes, it means you're going to consume my delicious, meaty butt cheeks to replenish your demonic fish powers.
How much of that water did you drink?
NOT ENOUGH!
....I'm hungry...
STAY AWAY FROM MY ASS!
YOU SICK MAN, JUST GIVE ME ONE OF THOSE SEAGULLS!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~A few more hours later~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Are we there yet?
No.
Are we there yet?
No.
Are we there yet?
No.
Are we there ye--
WHAT EVEN IS 'THERE!?' IS THERE SOMEWHERE SPECIFIC YOU WANT TO BE!?
Yes there is.
...
...
HOME! (gross sobbing)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~A few few more hours later~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ike, your stubble is coming out again.
It's been, like what, 5 days since I've shaved.
At least I have something to rub when I'm deep in thought about how we're gonna die.
When people find us, they'll think we've been out here for years because of your beard!
I much prefer the stubble, full on beards freak me out.
AND I MUCH PREFER WE NOT STAY OUT HERE FOR YEARS!
Ike, will your beard keep me warm at night?
I will not let my friends be devoured by the coldness of night. Roy, cuddle my face!
YAY! (embraces Ike's face)
Marth, join us in the warmth of my facial hair.
OH MY GOSH!
No.
ALL I DO IS LOVE YOU AND THIS IS HOW YOU REPAY ME! CUDDLE MY FACE!
I AM GOING NOWHERE NEAR YOUR FACE! I'M GOING TO STAY IN MY COLD CORNER!
THEN I'M GOING OVER TO YOU!
STAY AWAY FROM ME, YOU HAIRY BEAST! AH- (falls out of boat onto...land?)
Sand. S-sand!? WE'VE REACHED SHORE! OH THANK PALUTENA AND HOWEVER MANY MORE GODS AND GODDESSES THERE ARE! I STOPPED CARING! SWEET GLORIOUS LAND HOW I'VE MISSED YOU! (kisses ground and a beach crab)

WE'RE GONNA LIVE! YES! OH GOODNESS YES!
Save the celebrations, Marth. Where are we anyway? It looks like we're on an island.
A DESERTED ISLAND! THIS ISN'T HOME! AND NO MATTER HOW MANY TIMES I CLACK MY HEELS WE'RE STILL HERE! (furious clacking)
Were you wearing those the whole time?
YES I WAS!
But...you know what...I should just stop asking.
Well, we're on land now, but we're still stranded. So now what?

TO BE CONTINUED

THAT MEANS THERE IS GOING TO BE MORE????
Okay enough with my antics.
It has been like what 3-4 years?
I'm not coming back, I hope you know that....
Ehhhhhh we'll let fate decide.

Characters do not belong to me~
Art and ridiculous icon story belong to the one and only