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goldenrainfalling — False Strider-Dave x Fake Sibling!Reader
Published: 2013-07-12 22:36:00 +0000 UTC; Views: 19731; Favourites: 332; Downloads: 3
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Description  You're are a Strider and though you take great pride in that, you didn't even act like one. Your eyes aren't a red or an orange or any other crazy colour, they're just a sea green colour. Your hair isn't a near white blonde, it's raven black. You, unlike Dave or Dirk, got tan easily. You are the runt of the Strider family, they told you that you'd get your growth sprout soon, but you're thirteen and it still hasn't happened yet. While they have perfect teeth, you have an overbite. They strife on the roof daily, picking up their swords easily, while you could barely lift yours- and honestly, you'd rather have a gun over a katana. They could keep a straight face, while you struggled to stop from laughing. They wore 'ironic' shades and had perfect eyesight, while you needed glasses and were nearly blind without them. They could rap with ease, while you had to mull over it for ages. They figured things out quickly, while you were as dense as a boulder. They were like the Fey, perfect and cold- though, they weren't that cold, they just acted like that- and you were the human they stole from a random crib for entertainment. You even had some feelings for Dave that you knew were not sibling love. Every time he was around you blushed and stumbled over your words more than you already do. When you told Dirk about your feelings for Dave he just looked at you- at least, you think he did- and handed you a plush rump.
 "Your feelings are just being ironic." he had told you, and you believed him. You didn't want to believe that you wanted to have incest with your brother. It wasn't natural, and you thought it was disgusting, so for you to be in love with Dave just completely contradicted your own beliefs. Oh, and I forgot to add, you didn't call Dirk Bro like Dave, you just simply called him Dirk. Today, to make matters worse, Dave just couldn't leave you alone. This morning he woke you up by staring intently at you (He had taken off his shades), which caused you to jump and cover yourself with your blanket- you only slept in your underwear.
 "D-Dave! What the hell?!" you yelled at him, blushing furiously.
 "I'm just doing something different from my normal ironic activities so I can be more ironic." he said, blinking at you. What he didn't tell you was he actually did this every morning, this time you just woke up.
 "Why were you staring at me? Why not Dirk?" you asked.
 "I was going to but I heard his porn music on and I don't want to scar myself again, and are you sleeping with a... plush rump?" he asked. You had never slept with it before, why now?
 "Their asses are soft and plushy, okay?" you said, quickly defending yourself,"Why? You want it?" You picked it up and feigned throwing it at him. He jumped slightly and made a little squeak. You tried to hold in a laugh but failed.
 "Not cool, (Name), not cool." he said, quickly putting on his 'ironic' shades and maintained composure.
 "No, what's not cool is waking up to my brother staring at me." you said and you saw some emotion flash on his face. Pity? Sadness? Guilt? You couldn't tell. Not that he'd tell you or anything.
 "As I said, I'm being ironic." he said.
 "Everything with you is ironic," you said, rolling your eyes,"Sometimes I wish that you'd stop being ironic for one day. It gets annoying sometimes."
 "You really want me to?" he asked.
 "Yeah, and sometimes it seems that you and Dirk are hiding something from me. Like when I ask why I look nothing like you two, you guys hesitate before saying that my genetics are being ironic and I know that can't be possible." You say, fumbling with your blanket. You looked at Dave and he was looking down at his hands.
 "I'm sorry," you heard him whisper so quietly that you almost didn't hear it.
 "What?" you questioned.
 "I said that your genetics are ironic, being ironic runs in our DNA, derp." he said, getting up from the chair that he got from who knows where and walked out of your room. You looked at your alarm clock, it's nine in the morning. You sighed and flopped back into your bed. Great, now that he had woken you up you couldn't go back to sleep. You stretched and got up to get dressed. You put on a sea green tee shirt and some simple black jeans. You yawned and walked down stairs. When you got into the kitchen and opened the fridge you side stepped. A bunch of plush rumps fell where you were standing. Come on, that is getting so old. If Dirk wanted to prank you, he's gonna have to do better than that. You reached into the fridge and picked up the milk carton. You unscrewed the cap and took a swig of the milk. The sour milk that is. You ran to the sink and spit it out. You sniffed the milk and smelled a rancid smell. You gagged and checked the date. It's been expired for more than four weeks.
 "Ugh, why didn't anyone buy more milk?!" you exclaimed. You chucked it in the trash can and went into the bathroom. The aftertaste is worse than the actual taste itself. You took your toothbrush and squirted some toothpaste on it. You were about to put it in your mouth when you noticed the colour wasn't blue, but a white gray colour. That's like the colour of a guys...
 "Oh gross! Dirk! Why the hell did you put your aftereffects of your porn video in the toothpaste tube?!" you screamed, looking upstairs. You turned the water on to the hottest it could go and waited for it to actually heat up. While it was heating up you looked at what you thought was the toothpaste tube, but saw a white tube that had the words 'Don't Touch- Especially You (Name)!' You sighed, if he didn't want anyone to touch then why did he out it there? It's not like he has a camera in here... or does he? You looked in the mirror and saw a camera reflected back at you. You set the toothbrush in the sink to let the steaming hot water run over it and tried to take the camera down, but you were too short. You made a sound of frustration and jumped up to try to grab on to it, but it was out of reach.
 "Fine! I'll just use my mouthwash!" you screamed at the camera and stomped up stairs. Today was not your day. You opened your closet and dug around for your mouthwash, when you found it you cleaned your mouth out, closed the bottle, and threw it back into your closet. You walked back down stairs and turned off the water and put your toothbrush back in its rightful place. When you walked out of the bathroom you ran right into Dave, who was crouching down at your height level, and your lips mashed against his. You blushed furiously as he picked you up and pressed you against the wall and made your legs wrap around him. He kissed you hungrily, and as much as you hated incest you let your feelings run the show. You kissed back and your fingers tangled in his near white blonde hair. You felt him lick your bottom lip, asking for entrance. You opened your mouth and his eager tongue started to explore your hot, wet cavern. You started to fight back, but he won easily. He made it clear that he was the dominant one right now. Your legs tightened around him to pull yourself closer to him. He broke the kiss and started for your neck.
 "Wait, Dave, this isn't right. We're siblings, we... I can't." you said. You heard him laugh.
 "You're not a Strider, (Name). You're not even remotely related to us, you're an Egbert." he said, continuing for your neck.
 "You mean that I'm really related to John?" you asked, you knew who John was, he was Dave's friend who lived in Washington. You felt Dave nod into your neck. You were about to ask another question when he bit your soft spot, which made you moan instead. After that moment you just shut up and let the Strider do what he did best.      
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Comments: 381

goldenrainfalling In reply to ??? [2013-08-17 23:00:13 +0000 UTC]

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Creepypasta143 In reply to ??? [2013-08-04 06:18:14 +0000 UTC]

How da FUCK AM I AN EGBERT AND HOW DIDS I ENDZ UP IN DA STRIDER HOUSHOLDZ

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

goldenrainfalling In reply to Creepypasta143 [2013-08-04 19:51:40 +0000 UTC]

Ahem, you're actually a Strider, just a cousin. Dirk kinda 'ironically' forgot to tell Dave that detail.

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Creepypasta143 In reply to goldenrainfalling [2013-08-05 01:14:17 +0000 UTC]

Eh don't matter isn't it "more" ironic to date a cousin

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goldenrainfalling In reply to Creepypasta143 [2013-08-05 01:16:18 +0000 UTC]

Yes.

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Creepypasta143 In reply to goldenrainfalling [2013-08-05 01:38:00 +0000 UTC]

Then I don't see the problem they love ironic stuff they are ironic why not an ironic relashionship to top the cake

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goldenrainfalling In reply to Creepypasta143 [2013-08-05 02:00:52 +0000 UTC]

Well, reader chan is basically the complete opposite of Dave and Dirk so they don't really get the whole ironic thing. Maybe that's why Dirk 'forgot' to tell Dave.

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Creepypasta143 In reply to goldenrainfalling [2013-08-05 02:13:46 +0000 UTC]

Oh

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goldenrainfalling In reply to Creepypasta143 [2013-08-05 23:07:41 +0000 UTC]

yeah

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AliciaParkersons In reply to ??? [2013-08-03 15:09:49 +0000 UTC]

Egbert and Strider got together~~ Just not in the PERFECT way. Cos everybody loves

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goldenrainfalling In reply to AliciaParkersons [2013-08-04 19:50:48 +0000 UTC]

Yes, everybody does love , but you're actually still a Strider. Just a cousin.

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AliciaParkersons In reply to goldenrainfalling [2013-08-04 21:03:57 +0000 UTC]

I saw that. Dirk, being the ironic fuckass he is, forgot to tell Dave.

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goldenrainfalling In reply to AliciaParkersons [2013-08-04 21:16:05 +0000 UTC]

Yup!

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AliciaParkersons In reply to goldenrainfalling [2013-08-04 22:46:40 +0000 UTC]

There's a huge debate of incest with cousins, because incest usually emplies that it's a chain-link reference. Like, sibling to sibling, sibling to parent, sibling to grandparent. But cousins are alright, because there isn't direct blood link besides the grandparents.

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goldenrainfalling In reply to AliciaParkersons [2013-08-04 23:38:33 +0000 UTC]

I know.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Theghostofyoutoo In reply to ??? [2013-07-27 16:49:27 +0000 UTC]

Did you go look up what I look like? 'Cause that's the perfect description of me except I'm EXTREMELY tall. Great story by the way!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

goldenrainfalling In reply to Theghostofyoutoo [2013-07-27 16:54:33 +0000 UTC]

... Maybe...

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DefenderOfStars101 In reply to ??? [2013-07-23 07:32:06 +0000 UTC]

I knew it! I thought i was (actually) either an Egbert or an English, but i KNEEEEW IT!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

goldenrainfalling In reply to DefenderOfStars101 [2013-07-23 18:35:25 +0000 UTC]

Actually, you are a Strider, just their cousin. Dirk 'ironically' forgot to tell Dave that important information.

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DefenderOfStars101 In reply to goldenrainfalling [2013-07-25 04:32:51 +0000 UTC]

How "ironic"... Wait so I'm making out with my cousin??

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goldenrainfalling In reply to DefenderOfStars101 [2013-07-25 18:56:26 +0000 UTC]

Yes, yes you are.

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DefenderOfStars101 In reply to goldenrainfalling [2013-07-26 18:25:30 +0000 UTC]

Uh... Okay then..

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goldenrainfalling In reply to DefenderOfStars101 [2013-07-27 17:00:56 +0000 UTC]

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Stardust-Teh-Poneh In reply to ??? [2013-07-20 07:16:40 +0000 UTC]

how even did he get ahold of me? If i'm an Egbert how the hell did Bro even... did he steal me?

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

goldenrainfalling In reply to Stardust-Teh-Poneh [2013-07-21 18:14:13 +0000 UTC]

Actually, you are a Strider, just a cousin. Dirk 'ironically' (meaning he knew about how Dave felt about reader chan and wanted to make an... educational video) forgot to tell Dave about that.

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Stardust-Teh-Poneh In reply to goldenrainfalling [2013-07-21 20:05:33 +0000 UTC]

eeeee.....uh oh!


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goldenrainfalling In reply to Stardust-Teh-Poneh [2013-07-21 23:38:30 +0000 UTC]

Yeah...

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Stardust-Teh-Poneh In reply to goldenrainfalling [2013-07-22 13:00:50 +0000 UTC]

Bad bro! BAD! I will never feel right reading another one of these...ever.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

goldenrainfalling In reply to Stardust-Teh-Poneh [2013-07-22 18:32:42 +0000 UTC]

Hahahahahahahaha! Now I have successfully corrupted your mind!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Stardust-Teh-Poneh In reply to goldenrainfalling [2013-07-23 19:29:32 +0000 UTC]

NUUUUuuuuu eh Ill get over it.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

goldenrainfalling In reply to Stardust-Teh-Poneh [2013-07-23 19:34:34 +0000 UTC]

Dang it.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Stardust-Teh-Poneh In reply to goldenrainfalling [2013-07-23 20:15:59 +0000 UTC]

Yeppp~

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

goldenrainfalling In reply to Stardust-Teh-Poneh [2013-07-23 22:33:10 +0000 UTC]

*snaps fingers*

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Stardust-Teh-Poneh In reply to goldenrainfalling [2013-07-24 21:57:13 +0000 UTC]

Darn.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

goldenrainfalling In reply to Stardust-Teh-Poneh [2013-07-24 23:09:15 +0000 UTC]

Hah, I forgot what we were talking about.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Stardust-Teh-Poneh In reply to goldenrainfalling [2013-07-25 01:13:00 +0000 UTC]

Heh me too.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

goldenrainfalling In reply to Stardust-Teh-Poneh [2013-07-25 01:23:26 +0000 UTC]

Glad I'm not the only one.

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Stardust-Teh-Poneh In reply to goldenrainfalling [2013-07-27 08:50:20 +0000 UTC]

YES GOOD~

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

goldenrainfalling In reply to Stardust-Teh-Poneh [2013-07-27 16:56:10 +0000 UTC]

WE WILL ONE DAY TAKE OVER THE.... UH..... I FORGOT WHAT IT WAS CALLED....

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Stardust-Teh-Poneh In reply to goldenrainfalling [2013-07-28 03:41:16 +0000 UTC]

OH WELL.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

goldenrainfalling In reply to Stardust-Teh-Poneh [2013-07-28 18:10:23 +0000 UTC]

LIFE WILL GO ON!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Stardust-Teh-Poneh In reply to goldenrainfalling [2013-07-31 22:02:58 +0000 UTC]

YEP

HOPEFULLY

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

goldenrainfalling In reply to Stardust-Teh-Poneh [2013-07-31 22:47:20 +0000 UTC]

Here we are, aimlessly walking on the tight-rope we call life, and when we fall off... It'll fine another victim to torment. Making them wonder if they'll fall off or not.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Stardust-Teh-Poneh In reply to goldenrainfalling [2013-07-31 23:36:23 +0000 UTC]

... That was DEEP


👍: 0 ⏩: 1

goldenrainfalling In reply to Stardust-Teh-Poneh [2013-08-01 00:25:08 +0000 UTC]

Thanks, though, I wish I had put my copyright on it....

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Stardust-Teh-Poneh In reply to goldenrainfalling [2013-08-01 14:19:36 +0000 UTC]

You should


👍: 0 ⏩: 1

goldenrainfalling In reply to Stardust-Teh-Poneh [2013-08-01 19:18:14 +0000 UTC]

I did :3 I wrote it on paper and put my copyright on it.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Stardust-Teh-Poneh In reply to goldenrainfalling [2013-08-01 19:23:44 +0000 UTC]

Good~

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

goldenrainfalling In reply to Stardust-Teh-Poneh [2013-08-01 19:58:42 +0000 UTC]

Hehe It's mine now.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Stardust-Teh-Poneh In reply to goldenrainfalling [2013-08-02 00:12:50 +0000 UTC]

Yaey!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1


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