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Description
You think it was the smell that woke you first; sharp cleansing products mixed with something foul. You sit up and your head pounds, eyes throbbing in your skull, and you bring both sopor coated hands to cradle it. Your fingers run across the ridged scars over your nose and forehead and you sigh, head splitting and body aching from the night before. Your eyes snap open and your beat pump jolts painfully against your chest as memories from your botched suicide attempt rush back to you.

A dark oppressive feeling curls in your gut and you instantly want to forget. One hand reaches into the body warmed sopor and you don't even realize it till your licking the bitter stuff off your palm. Tears of shame prick your eyes but you still down large globs, each one making your aching head fuzzier till you're grinning through the coat of slime on your face and you can no longer remember why you're eating raw sopor.

You sit in your recuperacoon for a while, licking your fingers clean absently while your mind floats through a series of questions that you soon forget. Eventually you slide out of your resting place, green slime sliding down your naked frame and onto the grimy floor. Your first thoughts flutter towards the ablution trap and you smile as you agree with yourself.

The water turns to ice and you realize with a shiver that you've spaced out. You shut off the liquid that is quickly turning your body frigid and step out of the tub. There are no towels; you walk back to your respiteblock dripping.

There is a fresh set of clothes folded primly on your husktop chair; you pull them on without putting much thought into why or how they got there. They stick to your still damp body, but you don't mind. You don't mind much of any fuckin' thing right now. Your flying high and dazed, body warm and fuzzy from the sopor and it's fucking perfect. Your food bag grumbles and you frown, hand idly rubbing your complaining abdomen. You need some motherfuckin food.

You set off downstairs; looking around your hive as you descend from your respiteblock, and a slight frown forms, tugging the corners of your lips down as you start to realize through your haze that your home has been cleaned. This puzzles you; you don't remember any motherfucker offering to straighten up your digs. You walk past the front door and take in the sight of black bags piled up next to it, and they reek. You scratch your head in puzzlement and head to the nutritionblock.

You hear voices as you approach, and this time they're not in your head. You step through the threshold and look around. Your eyes automatically fall on your best motherfuckin' friend and a wide grin brightens your face. He looks up and shock is painted on his face like a mask; which reminds you that you still haven't painted your motherfuckin' face. You open your mouth to say "yo" but there's a movement behind your best bro and your eyes are quick to look.

Panic shoots through your chest so fast it takes a moment to register. Kanaya is standing behind Karkat with a teapot in hand and you need to get the motherfuck OUT. Karkat must have seen the change in your expression because he's on his feet now, arms out in front of him and his mouth is moving but you can't hear the words over the pounding in your hear tunnels. You bolt, back out of the nutrition block and back up the stairs. It's like all those sweeps ago in the medium, you hiding and her looking and motherfuck if she hasn't finally fucking found you.

Your breathing is ragged as your claw your way back up the stairs and sprint to your respiteblock. You slam the door closed and look for something to barricade the doors with. You hear Karkat scrambling up the stairs and you swiftly lock the door. You're hysterical, breath coming in ragged gulps and tears streaming down your face, beat pump pounding hard and fast in your chest; you feel like you're dying. Karkat is banging on the door, yelling that it's alright but you know that's a motherfuckin lie. Your emotions are crashing down on you all at once but the one that hurts the most is betrayal. You shove your desk against the door and crawl to the safety of your closet.

You're curled up in a ball in your clothing receptacle, the thin door closed. You can hear Karkat talking to you through the door but you don't actually hear what he's saying. You don't care what he's saying. He betrayed you. He let the troll of your nightmares in your hive. But what you don't understand is why. You let out a choked sob, purple staining your skin as your tears and snot dribble down your face as you curl in on yourself and shut the world out.

Description
You think it was the smell that woke you first; sharp cleansing products mixed with something foul. You sit up and your head pounds, eyes throbbing in your skull, and you bring both sopor coated hands to cradle it. Your fingers run across the ridged scars over your nose and forehead and you sigh, head splitting and body aching from the night before. Your eyes snap open and your beat pump jolts painfully against your chest as memories from your botched suicide attempt rush back to you.

A dark oppressive feeling curls in your gut and you instantly want to forget. One hand reaches into the body warmed sopor and you don't even realize it till your licking the bitter stuff off your palm. Tears of shame prick your eyes but you still down large globs, each one making your aching head fuzzier till you're grinning through the coat of slime on your face and you can no longer remember why you're eating raw sopor.

You sit in your recuperacoon for a while, licking your fingers clean absently while your mind floats through a series of questions that you soon forget. Eventually you slide out of your resting place, green slime sliding down your naked frame and onto the grimy floor. Your first thoughts flutter towards the ablution trap and you smile as you agree with yourself.

The water turns to ice and you realize with a shiver that you've spaced out. You shut off the liquid that is quickly turning your body frigid and step out of the tub. There are no towels; you walk back to your respiteblock dripping.

There is a fresh set of clothes folded primly on your husktop chair; you pull them on without putting much thought into why or how they got there. They stick to your still damp body, but you don't mind. You don't mind much of any fuckin' thing right now. Your flying high and dazed, body warm and fuzzy from the sopor and it's fucking perfect. Your food bag grumbles and you frown, hand idly rubbing your complaining abdomen. You need some motherfuckin food.

You set off downstairs; looking around your hive as you descend from your respiteblock, and a slight frown forms, tugging the corners of your lips down as you start to realize through your haze that your home has been cleaned. This puzzles you; you don't remember any motherfucker offering to straighten up your digs. You walk past the front door and take in the sight of black bags piled up next to it, and they reek. You scratch your head in puzzlement and head to the nutritionblock.

You hear voices as you approach, and this time they're not in your head. You step through the threshold and look around. Your eyes automatically fall on your best motherfuckin' friend and a wide grin brightens your face. He looks up and shock is painted on his face like a mask; which reminds you that you still haven't painted your motherfuckin' face. You open your mouth to say "yo" but there's a movement behind your best bro and your eyes are quick to look.

Panic shoots through your chest so fast it takes a moment to register. Kanaya is standing behind Karkat with a teapot in hand and you need to get the motherfuck OUT. Karkat must have seen the change in your expression because he's on his feet now, arms out in front of him and his mouth is moving but you can't hear the words over the pounding in your hear tunnels. You bolt, back out of the nutrition block and back up the stairs. It's like all those sweeps ago in the medium, you hiding and her looking and motherfuck if she hasn't finally fucking found you.

Your breathing is ragged as your claw your way back up the stairs and sprint to your respiteblock. You slam the door closed and look for something to barricade the doors with. You hear Karkat scrambling up the stairs and you swiftly lock the door. You're hysterical, breath coming in ragged gulps and tears streaming down your face, beat pump pounding hard and fast in your chest; you feel like you're dying. Karkat is banging on the door, yelling that it's alright but you know that's a motherfuckin lie. Your emotions are crashing down on you all at once but the one that hurts the most is betrayal. You shove your desk against the door and crawl to the safety of your closet.

You're curled up in a ball in your clothing receptacle, the thin door closed. You can hear Karkat talking to you through the door but you don't actually hear what he's saying. You don't care what he's saying. He betrayed you. He let the troll of your nightmares in your hive. But what you don't understand is why. You let out a choked sob, purple staining your skin as your tears and snot dribble down your face as you curl in on yourself and shut the world out.