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insertive-assertive — America names the capitals [NSFW]
Published: 2010-04-24 20:46:31 +0000 UTC; Views: 558; Favourites: 8; Downloads: 3
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Description It was a typical afternoon meeting for the Allies as they decided how to best combat the Axis Powers. England had punched France in the junk after the amorous country had gone a bit too close to Arthur's vital regions, and poor Francis was now off in the corner nursing himself back to health. China was reading a Shinatty-chan comic and laughing hysterically at random intervals. Russia…. Was still in the hospital after he jumped from the plane, but an uneasy Lithuania was covering for him, taking notes on America who had yet to shut up about his 'Brilliant and Foolproof plan" which had every other country as his support, him of course being the hero. England had been listening with increasing agitation and now exploded at the former colony.

"You git! Will you shut up about being the hero for two whole seconds?! You are clearly too self absorbed to be leading this meeting!" America stopped talking long enough to level iggy with a glance.

"I'm not self-absorbed, I'm just the most qualified to handle this! I have the most weapons and I'm the most awesome hero around, so it all makes sense-"

England smacked the table with both hands, then raised a finger, pointing right at Alfred. "Objection! You are the most self-absorbed wanker I've ever met!"

America blinked "Why did you smack the table like that? And I am not!"

England grinned smugly. "Prove it, Alfred. Tell me all of the capitals of the world."

America grinned and pulled out a fiddle. "Alright, but I'll do it MY way."

China and France looked over as England screeched  "Don't you dare bloody sing now or I'll-"

England was cut off as America started to play the fiddle, as a map came down to replace the chalkboard at the head of the room. England sputtered as the map only had the United States on it. "You have GOT to be joking." He said.

America began to sing, pointing at the capitals as he did with his fiddle bow.

"Baton Rouge, Louisiana; Indianapolis, Indiana
And Columbus is the capital of Ohio!
There's Montgomery, Alabama, south of Helena, Montana
Then there's Denver, Colorado, under Boise, Idaho.

Texas has Austin, then we go north
To Massachusetts' Boston, and Albany, New York
Tallahassee, Florida, and Washington, D.C.
Santa Fe, New Mexico, and Nashville, Tennessee."

England was slowly turning red as Alfred sang, while France had moved on in his attempts to woo the other members, and had moved on to poor Lithuania, who was shaking heavily as he tried to escape France's clutches. America winked at Iggy before continuing.

"Elvis used to hang out there a lot, ya know.

Trenton's in New Jersey, north of Jefferson, Missouri
You've got Richmond in Virginia; South Dakota has Pierre
Harrisburg's in Pennsylvania and Augusta's up in Maine
And here is Providence, Rhode Island, next to Dover, Delaware.

Concord, New Hampshire, just a quick jaunt
To Montpelier, which is up in Vermont
Hartford's in Connecticut, so pretty in the fall
And Kansas has Topeka; Minnesota has St Paul."

America danced a bit around near the map as he played the fiddle. China frowned over his comic, but tried to ignore the singing idiot. England was sputtering a bit, and shaking in fury.

"Juneau's in Alaska and there's Lincoln in Nebraska
And it's Raleigh out in North Carolina and then
There's Madison, Wisconsin, and Olympia in Washington
Phoenix, Arizona, and Lansing, Michigan.

Here's Honolulu; Hawaii's a joy
Jackson, Mississippi, and Springfield, Illinois
South Carolina with Columbia down the way
And Annapolis in Maryland on Chesapeake Bay.

They have wonderful clam chowder."

America smacked France away from Lithuania with a bowl of clam chowder, which France had to admit as he licked his lips, was very tasty. Arthur hadn't managed speech yet, but he was mouthing words, most of which seemed to be foul.

"Cheyenne is in Wyomin' and perhaps you make your home in
Salt Lake City out in Utah, where the Buffalo roam
Atlanta's down in Georgia, and there's Bismarck, North Dakota
And you can live in Frankfort in your old Kentucky home.

Salem in Oregon; from there we join
Little Rock in Arkansas; Iowa's got Des Moines
Sacramento, California; Oklahoma and its city
Charleston, West Virginia, and Nevada, Carson City.

That's all the capitals there are!"

America finished his song and bowed, looking at England expectantly only to duck as a chair came flying at him. "You sod! I can't believe you!!!" America laughed and ran around the room as England chased him, throwing any items within reach as well as obscenities at the younger nation. China flipped a page, unperturbed as he was thrown at Alfred and landed on top of France, who had been hit with a globe and had been knocked out. Lithuania was unsure of what to do and was altogether disturbed by the actions of the allies.
_________________________

Russia had been dozing lightly in the hospital bed when suddenly he awoke with a shiver "Someone's been touching Lithuania…" He murmured darkly. "I can't wait to find them an tear their organs from them and let them watch… kolkolkolkolkolkolkol…."
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Comments: 13

Nonagesimal [2011-11-08 07:22:43 +0000 UTC]

Verily da win.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

insertive-assertive In reply to Nonagesimal [2011-11-08 22:14:49 +0000 UTC]

Thank you verily for that win.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

TheKingdomBritianna [2010-05-23 11:40:26 +0000 UTC]

fffff lol Andorra..

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insertive-assertive In reply to TheKingdomBritianna [2010-05-23 13:07:47 +0000 UTC]

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TheKingdomBritianna In reply to insertive-assertive [2010-05-23 18:51:34 +0000 UTC]

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Serenity11Love [2010-05-03 22:50:06 +0000 UTC]

This helped me pass my state capitals test today o.o

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insertive-assertive In reply to Serenity11Love [2010-05-04 01:12:28 +0000 UTC]

SWEET!

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Serenity11Love In reply to insertive-assertive [2010-05-05 22:47:28 +0000 UTC]

Very ^^ (OTL sang it during test OTL)

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scoureroflostsouls [2010-05-02 00:57:17 +0000 UTC]

yAS! WIN!

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Vance-Wyatt [2010-04-25 03:07:17 +0000 UTC]

....LUL.

junk recovery.

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kiarasan97 [2010-04-25 00:40:27 +0000 UTC]

Oh God I KNEW SOMEONE WOULD USE IT SOMEDAY. WAKKO IS TOO AWESOME TO GO UNMENTIONED.

Bonus points for incorporating Animaniacs into it!!

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Lumenesca [2010-04-25 00:09:11 +0000 UTC]

I was humming the tune whilst reading this... XD

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RockinAnime [2010-04-24 22:14:48 +0000 UTC]

I sang the song as I read it. GO ANIMANIACS!

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