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kaleidofishFine, Fine, Fine
Published: 2012-06-24 02:15:57 +0000 UTC; Views: 9946; Favourites: 211; Downloads: 287
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Description Fine, Fine, Fine

Nothing changed in the classroom when Maria Diaz went missing. It was as if she'd never been there, sitting in her spot in the corner where the teachers couldn't rescue her from the other kids. Whoever said words never hurt was a liar in denial. Maria would have preferred the sticks and the stones. A broken psyche doesn't mend as cleanly as bone.

"Yo, Clarissa, wake up." Before she could turn in the direction of his voice, Sam punted a paperclip right into her forehead.

"What was that for? I was totally awake already." She whined. Mrs. Benson wasn't even finished her lesson yet. The fat witch was still writing math equations on the blackboard, oblivious to everyone snickering about how her ass was so big it didn't even look connected to her back. Mrs. Benson was gross; math was stupid. Clarissa was bored. Typical school day.

Sam grinned that imperfect grin of his. He needed braces. "If anyone would have invented a way to see through their eyelids, I guess it'd be you."

"Yeah, you guessed right. I'm a millionaire and everything. Worship me," Clarissa stuck out her tongue. "Can you text Ellie for me? I don't wanna take the bus home today."

"Why can't you do it?"

"Because my Mom took my phone away for something dumb. Just text her." She thought for a second. "Oh, and Ryan, too. We can all go to the movies after school or something."

"So, basically, text everyone except Dave. Got it." Sam said. Clarissa grimaced hearing his name.

"Dave's dead to me."

Clarissa, Sam, Ellie, and Ryan. In her mind, the four of them ran the school. Dave used to be part of the gang, until he decided it was a good idea to get involved with that Mexican chick Maria. Stupid! It was his mess that they had to deal with. His fault that Maria lost her footing on the well's edge. His fault that she'd become a pile of bones and fle
STOP THINKING ABOUT IT.

The five of them swore themselves to secrecy. It had been two weeks since then. It seemed like the police had given up on searching for her. She wasn't even a legal citizen. Somebody had smuggled her into a town where she didn't belong. Who cared about freaking Maria Diaz? Clarissa didn't, and that's why they had to bury the issue.

They filled the abandoned well with random stuff so no one would be any wiser.

Sure, they could have told someone that Maria fell, but they didn't want to get arrested for her mistake. Ellie was on her way to an Ivy league school. Sam had his family's construction business to worry about. Ryan was a baseball star. Dave was Dave - he was out of the group, but he was smart in his own goofball way. And, Clarissa was going to be a famous cellist.

They couldn't let Maria Diaz taint their futures. No one needs that kind of stuff on their record. Even being associated with the dead body would have made them look bad.

That night, Clarissa got a call from Stupid Dave Stupidboy (that was his new name on her phone).

"What is it?" She hissed. He'd interrupted a good episode of 16 and Pregnant.

"I know you're not talking to me anymore," his voice got quiet. "But, I think we have to tell someone about Maria."

"Don't say her name, you idiot!" Clarissa slammed her bedroom door closed so no one could listen in. "It's not like we pushed her in. It was your fault she was dancing on the well."

"I wasn't the one who kept spraying her with perfume. I wasn't the one who splashed the water on her. Iwasn'ttheonewhokeptyellingathertodance." The more he talked, the faster he went.

"Shut up! She loved every second of it. I asked her cómo estás, and she said bien. She said bien, bien, bien, over and over again! That's Spanish for good, you dumb ass." She screamed at him. "You invited her to hang out with us. It's your fault she's dead, not ours!"

"You guys didn't leave her alone. We're not safe from her. She keeps texting me!"

"You know what, Dave? I don't give a shit about your stupid jokes. Go ahead and tell the cops. We'll pin everything on you. It's four against one. Congratulations, goodbye." She ended the call.

Dave didn't show up to school the next day. Clarissa met with the others at lunch time. She told them about the phone call and how scared he sounded.

"It's guilt, that's all," Ellie decided. "He thought too much about it and he cracked."

"I know, right?" Clarissa smiled, glad to have her for back-up.

"Do you think he'll really tell anyone?" Ryan scratched the side of his neck. Nervous habit. He always did that right before he went up to bat on the field.

"He must have been bluffing." Clarissa knew he was too chicken to do it. As soon as he opened his mouth, they would have him in jail. "Besides, he was the one who told her to hang out with us. None of us have her number."

"Hey, Sam, are you okay?" Ellie asked. Sam hadn't eaten any of his food. He was 200 pounds too late to start dieting, so that was weird.

"Someone keeps texting me this," Sam slid his phone across the lunch table. "It's not funny."

Clarissa grabbed the phone first. The message said, "bien bien bien."

Ryan was the first to say what they were all thinking. "Dave."

"I'm calling him right now." No one answered the first time she called. Then, as soon as he did, Clarissa shouted right into the receiver. "Not cool, Dave! You've got another thing coming if you think it's okay to mess with us. You're not safe. When you get back to school, we're going to make your life a living hell."

"Mine already is," a woman answered.

"Huh? Who's this? Mrs. W?"

"David's mom. He killed himself last night."

"...What? Why? Did he say anything?"

Ryan, Sam, and Ellie looked at each other in confusion. Clarissa waved at them to be quiet.

"He wanted to get away. I-I don't know... Thank you for being his friend, Clarissa." She hung up.

We're not safe from her. What Dave said a few nights before popped into Clarissa's head. Did the guilt eat away at him that badly? She sucked in her lip to keep from crying. Clarissa had to stay strong. Cry babies can't be the boss of anyone.

"I don't think he'll text you anymore." She said.

"What happened on the phone?" Ellie reached for Clarissa's arm. Clarissa shied away from her hand.

"His mom picked up. She said that she'd talk to him about it. Problem solved," she forced a smile. "Everything's going to be okay."

But, it wasn't okay the next day. Sam was absent. He stopped showing up. Then, at lunch, Ryan got the bien bien bien text from an unknown number. Ryan and Ellie laughed it off, assuming that it was Dave's crazy way of getting revenge for ousting him from the gang.

"Maybe, Sam's in on it now." Ryan readjusted his hat. "There's probably something wrong on his dad's construction yard."

"Remember last year when his dad pulled him out of school for two weeks, all because he was going to be away in Finland, or something? Having a 17 year old being in charge is a weird business model, but I guess it works for them." Ellie mused.

"It wasn't like he was the boss. All he did was take orders from his dad the whole time." Ryan explained. "His phone was glued to his ear."

"Did Sam tell you guys anything about a weird phone call?" Clarissa had to ask.

Ellie shrugged. "He didn't tell me anything. I know he hasn't been answering his phone since he was absent, though."

"He must be swamped with work," Ryan bit into his sandwich. "I don't envy him for a second."

"If that number calls you, don't answer it." Clarissa warned him. Dave wasn't alive. He wouldn't tell Sam to prank any of them, and why would Sam even listen to Dave? Ellie and Ryan weren't making any sense.

"Why not? It's just Sam and Da
bien, bien, bien."

"What did you say?" Clarissa rubbed her ears.

"I said it's only Sam bien and
bien, bien."

"Shut up!"

"Calm down! It's like you're going crazy or something." Ellie clapped her hands in Clarissa's face.

"Y-you're right." She sighed. "Sorry." The rest of the lunch period was spent in silence.

When Ryan stopped going to school, Clarissa knew her hunch had been right. Dave hadn't killed himself for no reason. Sam wasn't tied up with his dad's construction business. Ryan couldn't be sick with the flu with his cellphone conveniently turned off.

Lunch time. Clarissa grabbed Ellie's phone out of her hands. There were 3 messages from the unknown number. Bien bien bien, again.

"They're having lots of fun trying to scare us, aren't they?" Ellie said. "They have to do way better than that."

"Ellie, don't you think it's weird that the three of them just happened to disappear after getting those texts? It can't be a coincidence." Clarissa didn't want to see Ellie gone, too. "Promise me you won't pick up the phone if they call you."

"What happened to her was an accident. I'm not bothered that they keep sending me this Spanish stuff. You shouldn't be, either." Ellie smiled. "Don't let this stuff get to you."

"Why would they joke with this? It's Maria."

The smile faded from Ellie's face. "I told you we weren't supposed to say her name."

"Sorry, but it's her! She's the one texting everyone. Dave told me it was her."

"He was trying to get inside your head."

"You're not listening to me! He's dead. She made him kill himself." Clarissa wanted to shake Ellie by the shoulders.

Ellie held herself back from slapping her in the face, a far more direct move. "You're the crazy one. If Dave was dead, it would be on the news. People can't kill themselves quietly. Everyone hears about it eventually."

Something dawned on her. "Was Maria on the news? The police barely did anything for her."

"She had to be. You're confusing yourself."

"My head hurts..."

That was the last time she saw Ellie. Dave, Sam, Ryan, Ellie. Maria Diaz had made them all disappear. This wasn't right. Who were the ones that put glue in her hair? Them. Who were the ones that shoved her to the ground, day after day? Them. They were the ones at the top, not her. Dead losers are supposed to stay dead!

Bien bien bien. Clarissa got the text message.

The fifth time it was sent, she found herself in front of the well Maria had fallen into. She had to know if she were dead. It was dark outside. The wind was so cold it made her shiver, despite three layers of clothes.

Dammit, Maria. You picked a horrible season to die. Clarissa aimed her flashlight at the bottom of the well. She couldn't see anything.

"Clarissaaaaaaa... ¿Cómo estás?"

"Maria? I knew you were alive, you crazy bitch!" She swung the flashlight to her left, searching for her. "Stop hiding from me."

"I'm in the well."

"How am I supposed to get down there?" Clarissa still couldn't see her.

"There's a rope. Use it to climb down."

"You better be telling me Spanish for sorry, because I'm not going down there."

"Lo siento. I hurt my leg when I fell. I can't make it back up."

Clarissa reached for the rope. "You're useless." She climbed up onto the well.

"Ask me how I'm doing."

"Do you ever shut up? No one likes you." She started lowering herself down.

The rope snapped from her weight. She tumbled, hit her head on the side of the well, and crash landed on her side. Her hair stuck together from the blood. It was hard for to breathe. Clarissa squinted into the darkness.

Of course, she'd get screwed over. At least Maria was around to call for help.

Someone picked up the flashlight and shined it into her eyes. "Seriously, Maria," Clarissa wheezed out. "Help me..."

"Say it." Maria ordered. She shone the light under her face, illuminating her shadows. Clarissa could see her black eye and the blood dribbling down her chin and the stains on her striped shirt. Life hadn't been kind to her. "¿Cómo estás?"

She raised the flashlight over her head.

"Bien --"
CRAK!
"Bien---"
WHAK!
"...bien."

Weeks later, four bodies were recovered from the bottom of the well.

Samuel Barnes,

Ryan Smithson,

Eleanor Reeve,

and Clarissa Douglas.

Maria Diaz was never found.

Bien, bien, bien.
Related content
Comments: 161

kaleidofish In reply to ??? [2012-07-16 20:49:48 +0000 UTC]

Thank you! They say that revenge is a dish best served cold, and the bottoms of wells are pretty chilling, so that worked out for Maria.

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DraculaMustDie [2012-07-15 22:37:38 +0000 UTC]

Nice one. Very creepy, nice twist.

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kaleidofish In reply to DraculaMustDie [2012-07-16 20:48:11 +0000 UTC]

Thank you. I love when horror stories end with twists, so I decided to write a twist of my own.

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KiwiRabbit [2012-07-15 22:15:31 +0000 UTC]

So creepy! I love it!^^

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kaleidofish In reply to KiwiRabbit [2012-07-16 20:47:25 +0000 UTC]

Thanks for the love!

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KiwiRabbit In reply to kaleidofish [2012-07-16 21:11:06 +0000 UTC]

No problem! I was thinking about this story all night! Bien, bien, bien. Creepy!

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viralremix In reply to ??? [2012-07-15 21:49:00 +0000 UTC]

Hey! Your story is really good; I read it all the way through. ;u; I can't say that happens very often with literature here on DA. I did want to mention that your dialog formatting is incorrect, though, it should be this:

"Say it." Maria ordered. --> "Say it," Maria ordered.

Dialog always has a comma at the end instead of a period. Your format is correct with an exclamation point or a question mark, though.

That's the only thing that jarred me in this story. Great work!

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kaleidofish In reply to viralremix [2012-07-16 20:47:01 +0000 UTC]

Thanks for letting me know about the grammar mistake. Honestly, I forgot about that rule. Thanks!

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dagoth-jeff In reply to viralremix [2012-07-15 22:18:07 +0000 UTC]

Does it really matter, though? What if she yelled:

"Say it!" Maria exclaimed.

I just think punctuation sets a tone better than a comma which seems incomplete.

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viralremix In reply to dagoth-jeff [2012-07-15 22:22:56 +0000 UTC]

Yes, it matters, because doing otherwise is grammatically incorrect.

'"Say it!" Maria exclaimed' would be correct. A comma should be there if there would have been a period. I already mentioned that "[her] format is correct with an exclamation point or a question mark, though."

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tr1st3r In reply to ??? [2012-07-15 21:10:25 +0000 UTC]

This is a very creepy yet sadly accurate social commentary.

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kaleidofish In reply to tr1st3r [2012-07-15 21:48:43 +0000 UTC]

Thank you. Bullying is a sad thing, that sometimes has dire consequences.

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spring-sky [2012-07-15 20:48:37 +0000 UTC]

Awesome !!!!!

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kaleidofish In reply to spring-sky [2012-07-15 21:42:21 +0000 UTC]

Thanks!!!!!

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spring-sky In reply to kaleidofish [2012-07-26 21:52:06 +0000 UTC]

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LinkNZeldaForever [2012-07-15 20:45:26 +0000 UTC]

Very good. People shouldn't bully other people anyway, regardless of race, religion, where they come from etc. It usually has a bad way of coming back at them in the end. I normally do not read other people's writings, but this was too good to stop. Great job! On a side note... what phone did Maria have? It seemed to be water proof and others should get the same phone too.

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kaleidofish In reply to LinkNZeldaForever [2012-07-15 21:41:10 +0000 UTC]

Thank you, and you're right! It's karma. As for Maria's phone...haha, I wish I knew!

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AIR-IS-LIFE [2012-07-15 20:37:47 +0000 UTC]

sooo good!

It should be like one of those thriller movies.

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kaleidofish In reply to AIR-IS-LIFE [2012-07-15 21:38:33 +0000 UTC]

Yeah, I can definitely see this story as a short film. Thank you!

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AIR-IS-LIFE In reply to kaleidofish [2012-07-15 23:55:51 +0000 UTC]

no problem!

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MrSmidget [2012-07-15 20:25:53 +0000 UTC]

Wow. This... is amazing. it gave me the chills. Words cannot describe exactly how this made me feel. Every single line is haunting. It has an overwhelming feel and a hidden message deterring you from ever bullying or forcing them to do something for fear of something happening to you similar to this scenario. Beautiful work.

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MrSmidget In reply to MrSmidget [2012-07-16 19:02:32 +0000 UTC]

No problem

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kaleidofish In reply to MrSmidget [2012-07-15 21:35:41 +0000 UTC]

Thank you for the thorough comment. I'm glad you were able to find a hidden message within the work, too.

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RebbleDiamonds In reply to ??? [2012-07-15 20:17:51 +0000 UTC]

Oh my god. This is INSANE. It drove my mind crazy XD This is an amazing piece of work. Your writing style is concise, but not primitive. It really looks like you know exactly what your doing, and as I writer myself, I really admire you. This inspired me (writer's block ). I got really into it, and the dialogue is just great. Congrats on the DD!
Cheers.

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kaleidofish In reply to RebbleDiamonds [2012-07-15 21:32:57 +0000 UTC]

Thank you! Wow, I'm happy my story was able to inspire you. That's one of the greatest compliments I've heard. Thanks again!

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RebbleDiamonds In reply to kaleidofish [2012-07-16 20:48:55 +0000 UTC]

Awwh, you're very welcome. Congratulations.

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Monologue19 [2012-07-15 20:17:03 +0000 UTC]

Wow...I haven't really read any of the literature on here yet, but I was curious about the DD. This is an amazing short horror story! It can be really hard to keep a good length when you have a story to tell, but you pulled it off wonderfully. Congratulations on the DD, well deserved!

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kaleidofish In reply to Monologue19 [2012-07-15 21:28:09 +0000 UTC]

Thank you! Hopefully, you'll read some more. There's a lot of great stories on this site.

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Armonah [2012-07-15 20:05:00 +0000 UTC]

What a way to be introduced to deviantART. Welcome, and congrats on the DD. It was a great story

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kaleidofish In reply to Armonah [2012-07-15 21:24:58 +0000 UTC]

It's been the best introduction I could ever hope for. Thank you!

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LadyAnnatar [2012-07-15 19:52:58 +0000 UTC]

too epic

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kaleidofish In reply to LadyAnnatar [2012-07-15 21:23:18 +0000 UTC]

Thank you!

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OnionFangs [2012-07-15 19:40:01 +0000 UTC]

For someone who just joined DA, you've got a whole lot going for you. Amazing job!

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kaleidofish In reply to OnionFangs [2012-07-15 21:23:06 +0000 UTC]

I know. I can't believe all of this happened. Thank you!

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Vueiy-Visarelli [2012-07-15 19:16:46 +0000 UTC]

Very well written. Found a typo, though: It was hard for *her* [<--missing] to breathe.

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kaleidofish In reply to Vueiy-Visarelli [2012-07-15 21:22:45 +0000 UTC]

Thanks for catching that typo! And, thank you for the nice comment.

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Vueiy-Visarelli In reply to kaleidofish [2012-07-16 18:02:37 +0000 UTC]

Sure, no prob.

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The-navet [2012-07-15 19:15:48 +0000 UTC]

Wow amazing story though it sincerely rinced me with fright XD!

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kaleidofish In reply to The-navet [2012-07-15 21:22:25 +0000 UTC]

Thank you! Glad you thought it was amazing and frightening.

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The-navet In reply to kaleidofish [2012-07-16 08:11:21 +0000 UTC]

You'e immensely welcome! You achieved in any case your goal brilliantly!

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nosedivve In reply to ??? [2012-07-15 18:47:50 +0000 UTC]

Really good story although the texting thing reminds me of Pretty Little Liars, haha. And the Spanish girl's name is really common...I don't know if that's a good thing or not? I don't know I hardly write stories
But awesome job! Congrats on the DD

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kaleidofish In reply to nosedivve [2012-07-15 21:22:03 +0000 UTC]

It's funny because I just started watching Pretty Little Liars a week ago, and the first thing I thought was, "hey, they're getting texts, too..." Although, PLL's very different. I'm only in the middle of the Season 2.

Her name being common was kind of on purpose. It increases the odds that readers might know or hear about a Maria Diaz. Thank you!

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nosedivve In reply to kaleidofish [2012-07-15 21:23:45 +0000 UTC]

Yeah, PLL is completely different, I just saw a similarity XD
That would make sense then, I guess that is a good thing for stories just not poems XD
You're welcome!!

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DamonWakes In reply to ??? [2012-07-15 18:35:09 +0000 UTC]

Just spotted this in the Daily Deviations section and thought I'd comment again to say congratulations. I can't say it's that much of a surprise!

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kaleidofish In reply to DamonWakes [2012-07-15 21:15:23 +0000 UTC]

Aw, thanks, DamonWakes.

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teacuppu [2012-07-15 17:49:27 +0000 UTC]

You got a DD!! I remember reading this on Lemmasoft and thought it's really good!
Congratulations! ^o^

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kaleidofish In reply to teacuppu [2012-07-15 21:14:28 +0000 UTC]

Hey, teacup! I'm shocked I got a DD, but I'm very happy. Thank you!

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clockworkXD [2012-07-15 17:26:04 +0000 UTC]

I like this very much~
Horror is my favourite and you sir/madam have done an excellent job in writing it!

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kaleidofish In reply to clockworkXD [2012-07-15 21:12:37 +0000 UTC]

Madam. Thanks, I'm a horror fan, too, so I'm glad a fellow fan found my story excellent!

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katieraff [2012-07-15 17:02:12 +0000 UTC]

Wow this is a great story, I love it

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