HOME | DD
Published: 2014-06-28 08:02:45 +0000 UTC; Views: 112; Favourites: 1; Downloads: 0
Redirect to original
Description
Darkness overtook his mind, his thoughts, leaving him senseless except for the internal screams of his body. At first, it seemed pitch black, but through the haze of agony and despair, he could see it was a hauntingly dark shade of red. Emotions tore through him relentlessly – anger, joy, pain, pleasure, hatred, love, glory, and shame; all searing his soul and leaving him with a feeling as though his hearts had shriveled up and refused to continue beating. His hearts themselves twisted as the painfully hot glow was wrenched from them and exploded throughout him; from his hearts to his bones to his skin to the world around him. Everything was spinning, he couldn't tell if he was screaming or crying or if he was even making any sounds at all. He could barely see anything except for memories, everything that had ever been important in his life, forcing themselves between his true vision and his brain. His hearts were now clattering in his chest like agitated prisoners in a jail cell. Every last one of his cells was burning – no, dividing – no, disintegrating…he couldn't tell. All he knew was that his essence was suffering, a feeling he knew all too well. He struggled in what felt like a living nightmare until he was suddenly blessed with a cool sense of relief, starting from his hearts again, and spreading throughout his body.The Doctor nearly burned his eyeballs with the friction his eyelids produced as they snapped open, releasing him from the terrible nightmare. He flailed in the blankets for a moment before coming to the full realization that he was safe now, in his bed in the TARDIS. This is why I don’t sleep, he thought to himself. He observed a comforting, warm feeling on his chest, opposite to the cool feeling in the dream that had provided the same sense of relief. He cleared his vision with a few bats of his eyelids and focused on the dainty but strong hand that was positioned reassuringly over his hearts. He followed the arm connected to the hand up to the body and the face whose it was and recognized River. Still shaken by the nightmare, he curled closer to her and just wept. She reached up with one hand and just stroked the Doctor’s hair while she left the other one on his chest, not pressuring him to tell her what had gotten him so shaken up. After a few minutes, he would squeak out words between weeps. “Re-regen…er…ation,” seemed to be the recurring theme. River didn't entirely understand, but she didn't need to to be there for him. She let him nuzzle up to her until his crying receded to sniffles.
“Shh, shh, it’s okay, sweetie,” River soothed.
“River, it was terrible,” the Doctor began, now able to speak after having been disabled by his intense crying. “I regenerated again…but I lost everyone. Everyone who’s ever been important to me. Everyone I love. Amy, Rory…” he paused to look up at her. "You."
River tried not to break down into tears herself from empathy, and instead moved in for a soft kiss. The Doctor’s lips were salty from tears, but she didn't care much. He was happy to return the affection and stayed connected to River’s lips as he hugged her tight and pulled her closer as if she would disappear at any moment. He could’ve gone on forever, but River gently broke away and touched his chest again, over one of his hearts. “I’m here now, that’s all that matters,” she assured, though she didn't quite believe it herself. The Doctor smiled, suddenly feeling tired, but wary of going back to sleep. River noticed it in his expression and gently put pressure on his chest to guide him to lie down again. She brushed the back of her hand along the side of his face, and he closed his eyes in response. She sang softly, the ancient, beautiful words of Gallifrey dancing off of her tongue, rising and dissipating into the air. The TARDIS dimmed the lights on her own as the Doctor drifted off into sleep, guided into pleasant dreams by the words of his home brought to life with the voice of his wife.