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lupus-astra β A lesson in realism:
Published: 2014-02-25 16:46:47 +0000 UTC; Views: 6522; Favourites: 408; Downloads: 0
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Description
you areonly human.
There is no such
thing as stardust
floating in your veins or
gloomy poetry stitched
right into your heart.
Your blood is made of
iron - unbreakable,
unbending and unmatched
by any other stronghold,
for you are a fortress
that they will never invade.
Stand up,
darling;
wipe those tears away
and know that
you are the only one
who can reinforce these walls.
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Comments: 93
It's funny that you speak about how you aren't stardust and gloomy poetry isn't stitched into your heart, and you speak on the other things as if you've romanticized them in some way, because those subjects are reversed in their meaning, for me. Making poetry simply to make one feel good isn't ever going to be masterful nor will it ever last, and I don't say that to undermine you or myself. It's perfectly fine and cool to do poetry like that, but just always be aware of what it truly is to you.
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I romanticize too many things so I tried to do something different. It's okay if it doesn't work for you. This is just something that actually helped me get through the day, so...
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After I posted that comment, I read the others and your responses to them. My comment was unecessary. You obviously know what you're doin'.
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I'm not one for poetry, but I find I rather like this. It does not attempt to hide the stark truth of reality; life hurts, but in the end only you can mend yourself. It's hard to put into words, but it's rather refreshing.
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We be glue. Super glue. Hot glue. Gluey-glue.
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Blunt indeed, simple and straight to the point, and if I am allowed to say, doesn't rely on self-pity and has a motivational message, always refreshing to see.
Nice images as well, and I particularly liked the first stanza... I'm trying to articulate why, but I believe it's because it doesn't dwell in self-importance. It acknowledges things are rough, and not fantastical, and you are ultimately responsible for your will.
The only thing I believe I can suggest is... more imagery, but this is a personal suggestion. I can see this being stretched more to include something with heavy imagery, particularly taking the barricade metaphor and extending it so that it captures that feeling of rebuilding and reinforcing. But this is only my approach, which is not the only approach.
Sorry for that: but this was a refreshing change of pace from your usual front-page poem.
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A lot of my stuff has too much imagery so this time I was trying to tone it down. Sometimes it just gets a little too...gilded.
Thank you, though. I'm actually pleased with this one.
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That's fine, I think it's a preference thing. And being pleased with your work is always nice.
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I really enjoyed this poem; it's simple but blunt, each word reminding how reality is a bitter pill to swallow, but once it goes down it rejuvinates the will to succeed and endure.Β It's instinctual that whenever the world pushes harshly against us, our only option is to push back, fight and win! ^_^
And each adventure in life is unique and special... although out bodies are made up of the same substances, we each have this awesome soul and conscience that no one else can intrude in.
Haha, that was a long rant.Β But thank you for fueling it, PrussianPersephone!
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rants are fun. I like rants. keep on rantin'.
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Haha, will do ^_^
Β
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thank yooouuu <3
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I have to say, I'm not much of a fan when it comes to most poetry, but there's something about your works that just resonates with me.
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because I'm fabulous
jk jk idk why you like mine I don't even like mine a lot
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This could be a response to so many of my poems, what with my perpetual use of breathing stardust like a drug and bleeding ink.
And holy crap why is everything you write beautiful?! <3
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nuh it's not shush
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Well i think it is. :3
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We are stardust - that's the way conservation of matter works. A fortress, not so much. I seem to get invaded by viruses pretty frequently.
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I was trying to talk about it in the "romantic" sense.
Depends on the person. I'm trying to become a fortress. I get taken down by life a lot.
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Nuclear chemistry is some serious shit.
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Ahh I love this It's nice to see a poem that calls out the romantic, hopeless melancholy that so many authors have adopted (myself, included, it is not a bad thing, it's just nice to see the change in pace) and bring light to our strength, as humans. Such a hopeful piece!
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I'm guilty of it a lot and so there are times where I just want to be semi-realistic. Thanks
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I initially thought this was going to be a harsh slap from reality, but it's actually a rather hopeful poem.
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Yes, it goes to show that reality doesn't always hurt people.
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Honestly, it was going to start out as such, but I buckled down and said, "No. No more sad poetry. Be somewhat happy for once. Or at least try."
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It's nice to see such a change.
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this is beautiful, I've always thought your poetry was so powerful
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ack, no it's not, it's just me whining. But thank you
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This is beautiful. You have great use of imagery here, especially the stardust floating in the veins and the gloomy poetry stitched into the heart. You have a true talent.
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Thank you so much!
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This is simply beautiful. I love the ending. 
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Thank you lovely <3
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Beautiful change of perspective. I think it's really nice to tell yourself positive things.Β
And yes, you are truly able to change the way you think and the outlook of your life. It's not the end of the world as we know it.
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hope it works I'm sick of this crap.
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And I get the sads when you feel down almost all the time.
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I'm glad to hear so!
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Except that we really are stardust: www.physics.org/article-questiβ¦
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I was going for it in a more "romantic" sense.
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