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Pencil-WolfAnxieties of a Conflicted Introvert
Published: 2013-09-26 00:34:03 +0000 UTC; Views: 5083; Favourites: 278; Downloads: 0
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I.

[i don’t want to
have to tell you i’m
sorry
again but
lately it’s been tough.
And i’m stricken with this feeling that
maybe i’m not good enough.]

run.


you see, somewhere out there
        birds are looking for nests and birds
        are finding them in the ribcages of souls but i
am tired of picking straw from my heart
and strings and hair that wrap around my fingers i’m—

[well sometimes i’m a little lonely
but i never wanted to tell you that]

escape.

--tired of seeing the ball i wind from
those leftover nests grow and grow—
                    [and i want more, want more, but
                                sometimes there’s only so much my heart can hold]

get out.

--and grow






II.

my life is a tree collecting bottles that
some drunken hippie filled with dye
and when the sun shines everything is fine
but when thunderstorms brew they are just dead
weight


i want to do what i want.

[i want more]

and sometimes walking is a chore. sometimes
    talking is hard when life is pushing on your chest
          and whispering in your ear

[i am drowning]

i can’t breathe.

anything more and i'll snap





III.
maybe this is why i write midnight poetry,
sugar-and-milk coffee poetry,
a warm blanket poetry, the kind
written when i’m most         secure.
                    [alone]



   but the problem with these moods are the damned birds that come with them.
and sometimes i  think

maybe if i slept, and slept, and slept,
they’d just build their damned nests and i,

i would feel better.





[i'’ve been
waiting for far
too long in the night,
and maybe i never wanted to
have to tell you this but lately
i’ve been feeling]















[alone].



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Comments: 83

urbyncolure In reply to ??? [2013-12-03 02:40:22 +0000 UTC]

No problem your writing was incredible

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

ayoowishes123 [2013-11-13 21:17:51 +0000 UTC]

how do you upload this

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Pencil-Wolf In reply to ayoowishes123 [2013-11-29 22:19:47 +0000 UTC]

I went to my sta.sh, typed it up there, and followed the submission process step by step.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

ayoowishes123 In reply to Pencil-Wolf [2013-11-30 20:02:15 +0000 UTC]

thx

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Pencil-Wolf In reply to ayoowishes123 [2013-11-30 20:03:05 +0000 UTC]

Welcome.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

melleshama [2013-11-13 18:07:43 +0000 UTC]

amaazing words !!!

guys could you suggest a title for this one pleaaase 

melleshama.deviantart.com/jour…

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

HappyChupacabra In reply to ??? [2013-11-13 16:19:01 +0000 UTC]

This is absolutely stunning -- an excellent interpretation of what social anxiety is like. We want to be a part of the social world but we're restrained by our fears. Your words illustrates it so perfectly. Excellent job!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Pencil-Wolf In reply to HappyChupacabra [2013-11-29 22:20:29 +0000 UTC]

Thanks so much! ^^

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mizzmint In reply to ??? [2013-11-13 14:40:36 +0000 UTC]

Congratulations on having your piece featured as one of today's DD's!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Pencil-Wolf In reply to mizzmint [2013-11-16 18:39:39 +0000 UTC]

Thanks!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

mizzmint In reply to Pencil-Wolf [2013-11-22 01:10:56 +0000 UTC]

You're very welcome

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

neko-shinobi [2013-11-13 14:18:47 +0000 UTC]

Wow. Truly amazing

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Pencil-Wolf In reply to neko-shinobi [2013-11-29 22:23:42 +0000 UTC]

Thank you ^^

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Lintu47 [2013-11-13 12:41:58 +0000 UTC]

    Congrats on the DD! Have a nice day!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Pencil-Wolf In reply to Lintu47 [2013-11-16 18:39:57 +0000 UTC]

XD This certainly helped my day.
Thanks!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Lintu47 In reply to Pencil-Wolf [2013-11-17 12:41:03 +0000 UTC]

    My pleasure

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Daghrgenzeen In reply to ??? [2013-11-13 12:02:06 +0000 UTC]

This is... Just... I'm speechless. I love this. Love. This... portraits some of the feelings and thoughts I've been going through lately... And the layout works just wonderfully. Congratulations on the well-deserved DD!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Pencil-Wolf In reply to Daghrgenzeen [2013-11-29 22:23:30 +0000 UTC]

Thanks so much! ^^ I hope you feel better soon. <3 The days I feel like this are particularly tough.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Daghrgenzeen In reply to Pencil-Wolf [2013-11-29 22:45:02 +0000 UTC]

You are most welcome.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

lomatic In reply to ??? [2013-11-13 11:46:39 +0000 UTC]

It's brilliant piece of writing and heartfelt.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Pencil-Wolf In reply to lomatic [2013-11-29 22:22:49 +0000 UTC]

Thank you ^^

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

lomatic In reply to Pencil-Wolf [2013-12-02 03:08:50 +0000 UTC]

my pleasure.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

UTERI In reply to ??? [2013-11-13 11:24:26 +0000 UTC]

I actually find the way that it is written makes it more enjoyable to read u w u great job!!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Pencil-Wolf In reply to UTERI [2013-11-29 22:21:38 +0000 UTC]

Thanks for the feed back, and for reading! ^^

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

UTERI In reply to Pencil-Wolf [2013-11-29 22:26:03 +0000 UTC]

No problem ^^

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JoekelCat [2013-11-13 11:01:14 +0000 UTC]

So beautiful :')

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Pencil-Wolf In reply to JoekelCat [2013-11-29 22:21:45 +0000 UTC]

Thanks <3

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

JoekelCat In reply to Pencil-Wolf [2013-11-29 23:42:56 +0000 UTC]

:3

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

robson666 In reply to ??? [2013-11-13 10:45:17 +0000 UTC]

congratulations to the well deserved Daily Deviation

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Pencil-Wolf In reply to robson666 [2013-11-16 18:39:27 +0000 UTC]

Thank you!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Aikaibyou In reply to ??? [2013-11-13 08:15:30 +0000 UTC]

This is wonderful *sniff*

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Pencil-Wolf In reply to Aikaibyou [2013-11-29 22:22:56 +0000 UTC]

Thanks <3 ^^

👍: 0 ⏩: 0


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