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This was not what the Dean of Decorum had planned
Though he'd chosen the moment to make a great stand,
But then just before matters could get out of hand
It was time that I issued a halting command;
They'd surrounded the Dean and were holding him tight
And they thought he'd be foot-tickled all through the night,
But I pushed to the fore with the whole of my might
And I spoke to convince them that this wasn't right;
"Now I heard the Dean's plan and I saw your dismay
And I'm thrilled that you love all our barefootin play,
But I need you to listen and hear what I say
If you wanna keep feet-ticklin, this ain't the way;"

"You can capture the Dean, though he's sly as a fox
You can keep him in jail, simply locked in a box,
You can pull off his shoes and remove both his socks
And he'll richly deserve all your teasing and knocks;
You can tickle his barefeet each day for a year
But there's one thing that's only too painfully clear,
If you force all his laughter through loathing and fear
Then he'll never embrace what you put him through here;
And it matters much more than a person could tell
That a feet-tickled dude comes to buy what you sell,
If it just drives his spirit back into his shell
It'll poison your own barefeet tickles as well;"

"You'll recall how it went when I got all of you
Though you struggled against me, before I was through,
You all came to embrace what I knew to be true
Tootsie ticklin was what you were dyin to do;
It was more than your barefeet and spirits set free
When you'd laughed yourselves silly and let out your glee,
Then your heartfelt reaction was easy to see
All you wanted right then was to feet-tickle me;
It's a powerful feeling to tickle bare feet
And to get a dude laughing is ever so sweet,
But the one thing that renders your triumph complete
Is when he gets converted to spreading the treat!"