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"All the other boys started to giggle and shout
That they loved the feet-tickling there seemed little doubt,
But I shrugged and attempted to figure it out
For I just couldn't get what it all was about;
Then I thought all the other boys seemed almost proud
That some foot-tickling made them all laugh really loud,
Til a sense of hilarity rang through the crowd
But I kept my composure and wouldn't be cowed;
I felt nothing to justify being so rude
As a way to spread joy, tickling seemed rather crude,
And a flimsy excuse to be acting so lewd
So I wasn't about to be sharing the mood;

All the other boys giggled and laughed like a fool
But some men were impressed I was keeping my cool,
And they started to think that I might be the tool
They could use for enforcing their etiquette rule;
As I took all their tickles without any strain
And they thought that my silence could start up a chain,
Until not the least trace of a smile would remain
So we set out to conquer hilarity's reign;
Then I kept my composure and just couldn't lose
Setting out on the path I was happy to choose,
When the foot tickling stopped the boys put on their shoes
And they found better methods to conquer the blues;

So I started my pathway from that day to this
At restoring decorum I just couldn't miss,
Making impolite conduct deflate with a hiss
Then I met with your victims of foot-tickled bliss;
Now I've followed your trail and I stand at your side
Just to beat you in person and all that you've tried,
While I'm keenly restoring the source of my pride
And my total supremacy can't be denied;
I'm determined to make you admit I'm elite
From a worthy opponent, such tribute is sweet,
When it comes to composure my will won't be beat
So don't think you'll get anywhere tickling my feet;"