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Description
Consummation

The celebration lastly late into the night. Loki observed from the edges of the main room of the palace, never really immersing himself in the activity, even though he knew Nakaba would allow him to. He wanted no part in it. Many times, his eyes wandered to the front of the room where Nakaba and Adele sat. He fought it as best he could; the sight of them together only pierced the arrow deeper into his chest. But his eyes seemed to have a mind of their own and try as he might, he could not control their errant ways.

At one point, Adele pulled Nakaba into the middle of the dancers. Like one witnessing a disaster, Loki could not tear his eyes away. He watched as she moved gracefully across the polished floor, her feet barely touching the ground. Her face was radiant with a bright smile and glistening eyes. Something Adele whispered in her ear had her throwing her head back and laughing. To anyone watching, she seemed the very image of a radiant and happy bride.

Even Loki began to doubt, watching her lose herself so completely in the celebrations. His chest and throat contorted at the betrayal she displayed. How could she be so happy, knowing what she knew? Could she so easily dismiss him and the pain she caused? But Loki knew Nakaba better than anyone else in the world. Once he clawed past his own pain, he could see what she was hiding. The anguish that no one else suspected. Unable to bare it any longer, he turned and left the room.

The party didn’t end at the palace. As Loki made his way to his room, he passed merrymakers in the streets and drunken citizens stumbling into each other, singing off-tune at the top of their lungs. Despite his pain, Loki smiled to himself. It really was a good party.

Nakaba knew the exact moment Loki left the palace’s room. Even if she hadn’t witnessed his departure, she would have felt it. Loki had that effect on her. He emitted a warmth she could feel anytime he was near. With him gone, she seemed to deflate, all energy leaving her with his absence. Adele noticed her sudden fatigue and caught her under her elbow.

“Are you unwell?” he asked, concerned.

“No, just tired,” she answered, smiling up at him. “I guess I’ve partied myself out.”

“Do you wish to retire?”

The question was a loaded one, even if Adele didn’t realize it. Nakaba knew what she had to do and the sooner she did it, the better. Otherwise, her resolve would break and she would never be able to see it through. Taking a mental breath, she looked up at him. His concerned eyes bore into her. Pushing up onto her toes, she pressed her lips to his. Adele’s shock only lasted a second before he wrapped his arms around her, deepening the kiss. Nakaba moaned, already missing Loki’s warm embrace. Adele mistook her moan for pleasure and pulled her tightly against him. The sound of applause broke through the spell and the couple broke apart, realizing the large audience they had. Adele laughed and waved them off.

“I think it is time my wife and I retire,” he called, holding his hand out to Nakaba. The crowd cheered as Nakaba and Adele left the room.

Nakaba followed Adele for several minutes, trying to work up the courage to follow through with what she started. Could she really do this to Loki? If she gave up her plan to take the Senan throne, she could just build a simple life with Loki and their child. She knew she would be happy with that. But then, nothing would ever change. Both them and their children would be ostracized and ridiculed, if not worse. With this decision, there was the chance that Nakaba could change how Ajin were viewed and treated. She could keep other children from experiencing that kind of life. But it would mean forever giving up her love for Loki. Just the thought had her stumbling in her walk, a lump lodging in her throat.

Adele felt her stumble and turned to her. “Are you sure you are well? You have been off all day.”

“Yes,” she said, forcing her body to relax. “I guess I’m just nervous.”

“Why are you nervous?”

“Any bride would be nervous at her consummation.”

It was Adele’s turn to stumble. “Consummation?”

“Yes, unless you don’t want to.”

“Of course I want to.” He took both her hands in his. “Are you sure you’re ready? This marriage will be real once it is consummated.”

“I’m ready.”

A huge grin spread across his face and he pulled her into his arms. Without another word he guided her through the darkened hallways to her room. Some part of her mind wondered why he was taking her to her room instead of his own. But the majority of her mind focused on Loki. She would lose herself in thoughts of him to get through this.

Too soon they reached her room. Adele opened the door and swept her off her feet. Carrying her across the threshold, he kissed her deeply. Nakaba closed off her mind and kissed him back, all rational thought thrown out the window. Adele carried her to the bed and gently laid her down. For a few minutes, he just stared at her.

“You are so beautiful,” he said. “All those years that I was mean to you, it was only because I was so enraptured by you. If anyone knew how much I wanted you, I would have been treated poorly. I know it isn’t an excuse. But it is the truth. I have loved you half my life.”

Nakaba stared at him, speechless. She didn’t want a confession from him. She wanted him to act like a typical guy, to do his business and get on with his life. This Adele scared her.

“I love you, Nakaba,” he continued, oblivious to her inner struggle. “Thank-you for coming back to me.”

With that, he lowered himself next to her on the bed and kissed her. He trailed kisses along her jaw and across her shoulder, slowly removing the clothing that encumbered his journey. Nakaba fought a mental battle as she tried to stay focused on Adele. If he suspected this was not her decision, he would stop and she would be in trouble. Luckily, Adele was lost in his passion and all Nakaba had to do was follow his lead.

Sometime later, Adele lay sleeping next to Nakaba, his arm draped possessively over her bare chest. His long, midnight hair fanned across his pale back and Nakaba’s stomach. A contented smile stretched across his face. Nakaba couldn’t fault the prince his happiness. He had done nothing wrong. Still, her heart ached for another raven-haired man. Looking over at Adele, she began to think about her unborn child. With both Adele and Loki having dark hair, there was a good chance the child would have dark hair as well. The only thing that would show the child’s true identity is if it had Ajin characteristics, like Loki’s ears and tail, or Loki’s silver eyes. With diluted Ajin blood, it was unlikely it would possess Ajin characteristics.

Nakaba’s eyes filled with tears. She was stuck between two men who loved her and she could do nothing but hurt them both. Running her hand down Adele’s hair she stifled a whimper. “I’m so sorry,” she whispered, although she was no longer sure who she was apologizing to.

Dawn came just a few hours later and Nakaba knew she had to get up. She needed to remove all traces of Adele from her room before Loki arrived. Even though the Ajin knew what needed to be done, she didn’t want to rub it in his face. Adele still slept so she quietly made her way to her bathroom. She scrubbed her skin raw to remove the prince’s scent. The heavy perfume in the soap helped and before long, she was satisfied. Leaving the bathroom, she quickly changed. Adele was awake, watching her move about the room.

“Don’t you have business to attend to?” she asked, picking up her clothes from the previous evening.

“Are you trying to get rid of me?” A smirk stretched across his face.

“Yes, I need to change the sheets.”

“Why? They smell perfectly fine to me. Unless…you’re worried about someone else smelling them.”

His knowing response had her snapping her head in his direction. That was why he had brought her to her room! He wanted Loki to know what happened.

“I’m not sure what you mean but if you are referring to Loki, I told you, we don’t have that kind of relationship.”

“Maybe not, but as a man, I know he wants more from you. Consider this marking my territory.”

“Don’t be a neanderthal. Get dressed and get out of my room.”

Adele chuckled good-naturedly. “Yes, ma’am.”

Gathering up his clothes, he placed a gentle kiss against her temple and slipped from the room. Nakaba hurried to strip the sheets and tossed them down the laundry shoot. As she turned around, a wave of dizziness swept over her and she grappled for anything to hold on to. A pair of strong arms grasped her around the waist and she was pulled against a solid frame.

“Shh,” came Loki’s deep voice. “You’re alright now. I’ve got you.”

A sob escaped her as she turned into him and buried her face in his robe. He pulled her against him and held her tightly. They stood that way for several minutes. Finally, Nakaba regained her composure and stood back.

“Thank-you, Loki.” She reached up her hand and ran her fingers through his hair.

Despite her efforts, her hands held Adele’s scent, leftover from disposing the sheets. Loki’s reaction was visceral. He pulled her hands away and stepped back.

“It was nothing, Princess,” he said, a cold edge to his voice. “Anyone would have done the same.”

Nakaba, hurt by his reaction, nodded and tucked her hands behind her back. “I’m sorry…”

“For what?” Loki asked, his silver eyes flashing something just beyond Nakaba’s comprehension. “You were just doing what needed to be done, as you always do.”

“Are you angry?”

“It doesn’t matter what I am. I am insignificant. I do not even have the right to be angry.”

“How can you say that?” Nakaba asked, shocked by his answer. “You are not insignificant and I always care how you feel.”

“What is the point, Nakaba? What can be gained by me having an opinion one way or the other? Are you suddenly able to relieve my fears, my hurts and my anger? Can you take this all-consuming agony away from me?”

Tears filled Nakaba’s eyes again at his passion-filled words. Even with the distance between them, she could see the trembling of his frame. She wanted to wrap her arms around him, to bury him within her soft embrace. But right now, that would be the same as a slap in the face.

“I cannot,” she cried.

“I hope…” he started, fighting past a lump in his throat. “I hope it was worth it. I hope that you are able to accomplish all that you set out to accomplish. And I really hope that my child is given everything that he or she deserves.”

“Loki, are you planning on leaving?” Nakaba’s eyes were wide with barely controlled panic.

“I don’t know,” he answered truthfully. “I don’t know if I can bare to watch someone else raise my child. My every desire, for most of my life, was to be with you and to have a family together. I have stood by you through everything. I know you better than anyone in the world. To take something that was so close to everything I’ve ever wanted and tell me I have to watch someone else enjoy it, is just too much. Ask yourself this. How would you feel if you and Caesar had a child and he took it to raise it with Louise instead? Not only that, you had to watch it everyday. Would you be able to handle it?”

Nakaba collapsed to the floor, deep sobs wracking her frame. “I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry! I know it is selfish. I know I’m the most horrible person to ever live. But, I can’t do this without you. I just can’t. Please, Loki! Please don’t leave me to do this all alone. Where will I be without you?”

Loki closed his eyes. He couldn’t bare her tears. Dropping to his knees he pulled her into his arms. He didn’t promise her anything but he knew, deep in his soul, he would never leave her. Even without words, Nakaba knew this as well. The pounding of his heart against her ear was promise enough.

Loki no longer visited Nakaba’s chambers. Several weeks had passed since she consummated her marriage and the ajin did not want to be anywhere near the place it had happened. Not only that, since allowing Adele into her bed, the prince visited her often. She never spoke of it, and anytime she was near Loki she made sure to remove any trace of her lover. Still, Loki knew what was happening. While he did not fault Nakaba, the pain created a hollow pit within him.

He sought the company of village women to keep his mind off what he really wanted but it only made him feel more hollow, especially given that they treated him as little more than a pet. The day Nakaba broke the news of her pregnancy, Loki was visiting the marketplace. He wasn’t there for anything specific. He just didn’t want to be near the palace. In fact, he had avoided it for days. Nakaba had called for him a few times but he ignored the whistle. Deep down, he wanted her to hurt, to believe, for just a short time, that he had left. He wanted her to feel at least a fraction of what he felt as he watched his world crumble around him.

Perhaps because of his absence, Nakaba did not tell him she was informing Adele. Maybe that was why she had called him. The news traveled from the palace and into the village streets where midwives and old crones gushed over the news. The younger women took the news and spread it far and wide. Before long, everyone within the walls of Senan knew Nakaba was carrying prince Adele’s child.

I wonder what they would say if they knew it was my child growing within her? Loki thought, disgusted at the gossipers. Turning from them, he made his way to the palace. He couldn’t avoid her forever.

Nakaba paced the floor of the hall. She didn’t want to tell anyone of her pregnancy until she had spoken with Loki but Adele suspected something was wrong when she couldn’t keep anything down. She’d held out for as long as she could, hoping Loki would come back from wherever he was. When he didn’t answer her call, something he had never done, she knew she had to tell the prince.

Where are you, Loki? she thought. You promised you wouldn’t leave. She had bitten her nails down to stubs and now chewed at the skin of her fingers. Almost a week he had been gone and Nakaba’s nerves were shot. She had never been this long without her closest companion. But Nakaba understood why Loki kept his distance. She knew allowing Adele entrance into her bedchamber would change their relationship. The prince visited Nakaba most nights and she had no excuse to refuse him. At least none she could admit to. Nakaba missed Loki’s constant companionship. Not having him by her side made her feel all alone.

“Nakaba, love. Is everything all right?” Adele asked, coming up to her. “You are pacing a hole in the floor.”

Nakaba looked up at the prince, concern etched across his face. She sighed and stopped pacing. He had been the perfect gentleman and the news of her pregnancy had put him on cloud nine. She did not want to do anything to upset him.

“I’m just worried about Loki,” she said, honestly.

“I’m sure he is fine. Probably off to find someone else to occupy his time.”

“Probably. But he’s never been gone this long. What if he left for good?”

Adele smirked. “Well, then…good riddance. I didn’t like him hanging out with you all the time anyway.”

“Adele! Loki is my friend.” Nakaba’s old spirit flared and she threw daggers at the prince with her eyes.

“Ah, there’s my girl! Do you feel better now?”

“No. Now I’m worried and angry.” Turning toward the window, Nakaba crossed her arms and huffed.

Adele, trying to appease his wife, wrapped his arms around her. “The ajin will come back once he has licked his wounds. I wouldn’t worry about him. I’ve seen him in action. Nothing is going to happen to him.”

“I hope you’re right.”

Adele kissed her on the top of the head and released her. “I have to go out of the palace for a few days. Will you be okay while I’m gone?”

“Yes. My ladies do a good job of taking care of me.”

“Good. I will see you when I get back then.” He kissed her deeply and then disappeared down the hall.

Nakaba turned back to the window, bringing her fingers back to her mouth. Loki, where are you?

That evening, Nakaba sat on her balcony as she had done so many times before. Leaning her head back against the balcony wall, she closed her eyes and activated her Arcana of Time. She wanted to see if she could figure out where Loki was.

She stood in a dark hallway full of doors. Moving toward them, she found them all locked. Her feet echoed as she made her way from one door to the next. As she was about to give up, a wolf appeared in front of her. The animal stood majestically a few feet away, its silver eyes reflecting the little light in the hall. Nakaba knew instinctively that it was Loki but the wolf did not move or speak. It just stood, frozen in time.

Nakaba took a step toward him and he vanished.

No! she cried and began running.

She didn’t want to be all alone. Tears filled her eyes as she thought about never seeing her beloved Loki again.

The anguished sob that pushed her out of her Arcana of Time echoed off the palace walls and down into the streets. One sob led to another and before long, she was doubled over, her head against the concrete floor and tears streaming from her eyes. Strong arms pulled her against a warm chest and Nakaba knew Loki had come back to her. She cried harder with the realization that he had come to her at her chambers where Adele resided most nights. He just held her and stroked her back.

“I thought you had left,” she sobbed. “I though I was all alone.”

“I know,” was all he said.

For many minutes he held her, until the worst of her anguish had passed. She look at him with red-rimmed eyes. His stoic face was so foreign to her that she pulled back. He showed neither calmness like he once did, or anger, or sadness. In fact, his face showed no emotion at all. Even his eyes reflected no emotion back. Nakaba had always loved his eyes because she could tell how he was truly feeling by looking into them. Now, they were empty.

“Loki…”

The ajin stood and held out a hand to her. “You called?”

Nakaba took his hand and got to her feet. A spark of anger at his nonchalance flared in her chest. “Yes, several times.”

“I am here.” He bowed stiffly.

“Have you heard the news?”

Loki, still bowing, grit his teeth together. “Everyone has heard the news, my princess.”

“Loki, look at me.”

The ajin stood again and looked just past her. Nakaba narrowed her eyes and moved to stand mere inches from him. There! A flicker of anger in his silver orbs. She sighed and wrapped her arms around his stiff form.

“I missed you,” she whispered.

Loki sighed as well. He could never stay mad at her. “I will not leave you unless you tell me to go. And even then, it will be a hard thing for me to do.”

Nakaba pulled back slightly and looked up at him, threading her fingers through his hair. Loki’s breath hitched at the feeling of her fingers against his ears and the back of his neck. He finally looked at her and his eyes flared with passion. No one could ignite that fire in him they way Nakaba did. Lifting her up, he carried her to the bed, his mouth finding hers along the way. Both Nakaba and Loki knew it was wrong. Nakaba belonged to Adele in every way but Loki had claimed her first. In his mind, he was simply reclaiming what was already his.

Description
Consummation

The celebration lastly late into the night. Loki observed from the edges of the main room of the palace, never really immersing himself in the activity, even though he knew Nakaba would allow him to. He wanted no part in it. Many times, his eyes wandered to the front of the room where Nakaba and Adele sat. He fought it as best he could; the sight of them together only pierced the arrow deeper into his chest. But his eyes seemed to have a mind of their own and try as he might, he could not control their errant ways.

At one point, Adele pulled Nakaba into the middle of the dancers. Like one witnessing a disaster, Loki could not tear his eyes away. He watched as she moved gracefully across the polished floor, her feet barely touching the ground. Her face was radiant with a bright smile and glistening eyes. Something Adele whispered in her ear had her throwing her head back and laughing. To anyone watching, she seemed the very image of a radiant and happy bride.

Even Loki began to doubt, watching her lose herself so completely in the celebrations. His chest and throat contorted at the betrayal she displayed. How could she be so happy, knowing what she knew? Could she so easily dismiss him and the pain she caused? But Loki knew Nakaba better than anyone else in the world. Once he clawed past his own pain, he could see what she was hiding. The anguish that no one else suspected. Unable to bare it any longer, he turned and left the room.

The party didn’t end at the palace. As Loki made his way to his room, he passed merrymakers in the streets and drunken citizens stumbling into each other, singing off-tune at the top of their lungs. Despite his pain, Loki smiled to himself. It really was a good party.

Nakaba knew the exact moment Loki left the palace’s room. Even if she hadn’t witnessed his departure, she would have felt it. Loki had that effect on her. He emitted a warmth she could feel anytime he was near. With him gone, she seemed to deflate, all energy leaving her with his absence. Adele noticed her sudden fatigue and caught her under her elbow.

“Are you unwell?” he asked, concerned.

“No, just tired,” she answered, smiling up at him. “I guess I’ve partied myself out.”

“Do you wish to retire?”

The question was a loaded one, even if Adele didn’t realize it. Nakaba knew what she had to do and the sooner she did it, the better. Otherwise, her resolve would break and she would never be able to see it through. Taking a mental breath, she looked up at him. His concerned eyes bore into her. Pushing up onto her toes, she pressed her lips to his. Adele’s shock only lasted a second before he wrapped his arms around her, deepening the kiss. Nakaba moaned, already missing Loki’s warm embrace. Adele mistook her moan for pleasure and pulled her tightly against him. The sound of applause broke through the spell and the couple broke apart, realizing the large audience they had. Adele laughed and waved them off.

“I think it is time my wife and I retire,” he called, holding his hand out to Nakaba. The crowd cheered as Nakaba and Adele left the room.

Nakaba followed Adele for several minutes, trying to work up the courage to follow through with what she started. Could she really do this to Loki? If she gave up her plan to take the Senan throne, she could just build a simple life with Loki and their child. She knew she would be happy with that. But then, nothing would ever change. Both them and their children would be ostracized and ridiculed, if not worse. With this decision, there was the chance that Nakaba could change how Ajin were viewed and treated. She could keep other children from experiencing that kind of life. But it would mean forever giving up her love for Loki. Just the thought had her stumbling in her walk, a lump lodging in her throat.

Adele felt her stumble and turned to her. “Are you sure you are well? You have been off all day.”

“Yes,” she said, forcing her body to relax. “I guess I’m just nervous.”

“Why are you nervous?”

“Any bride would be nervous at her consummation.”

It was Adele’s turn to stumble. “Consummation?”

“Yes, unless you don’t want to.”

“Of course I want to.” He took both her hands in his. “Are you sure you’re ready? This marriage will be real once it is consummated.”

“I’m ready.”

A huge grin spread across his face and he pulled her into his arms. Without another word he guided her through the darkened hallways to her room. Some part of her mind wondered why he was taking her to her room instead of his own. But the majority of her mind focused on Loki. She would lose herself in thoughts of him to get through this.

Too soon they reached her room. Adele opened the door and swept her off her feet. Carrying her across the threshold, he kissed her deeply. Nakaba closed off her mind and kissed him back, all rational thought thrown out the window. Adele carried her to the bed and gently laid her down. For a few minutes, he just stared at her.

“You are so beautiful,” he said. “All those years that I was mean to you, it was only because I was so enraptured by you. If anyone knew how much I wanted you, I would have been treated poorly. I know it isn’t an excuse. But it is the truth. I have loved you half my life.”

Nakaba stared at him, speechless. She didn’t want a confession from him. She wanted him to act like a typical guy, to do his business and get on with his life. This Adele scared her.

“I love you, Nakaba,” he continued, oblivious to her inner struggle. “Thank-you for coming back to me.”

With that, he lowered himself next to her on the bed and kissed her. He trailed kisses along her jaw and across her shoulder, slowly removing the clothing that encumbered his journey. Nakaba fought a mental battle as she tried to stay focused on Adele. If he suspected this was not her decision, he would stop and she would be in trouble. Luckily, Adele was lost in his passion and all Nakaba had to do was follow his lead.

Sometime later, Adele lay sleeping next to Nakaba, his arm draped possessively over her bare chest. His long, midnight hair fanned across his pale back and Nakaba’s stomach. A contented smile stretched across his face. Nakaba couldn’t fault the prince his happiness. He had done nothing wrong. Still, her heart ached for another raven-haired man. Looking over at Adele, she began to think about her unborn child. With both Adele and Loki having dark hair, there was a good chance the child would have dark hair as well. The only thing that would show the child’s true identity is if it had Ajin characteristics, like Loki’s ears and tail, or Loki’s silver eyes. With diluted Ajin blood, it was unlikely it would possess Ajin characteristics.

Nakaba’s eyes filled with tears. She was stuck between two men who loved her and she could do nothing but hurt them both. Running her hand down Adele’s hair she stifled a whimper. “I’m so sorry,” she whispered, although she was no longer sure who she was apologizing to.

Dawn came just a few hours later and Nakaba knew she had to get up. She needed to remove all traces of Adele from her room before Loki arrived. Even though the Ajin knew what needed to be done, she didn’t want to rub it in his face. Adele still slept so she quietly made her way to her bathroom. She scrubbed her skin raw to remove the prince’s scent. The heavy perfume in the soap helped and before long, she was satisfied. Leaving the bathroom, she quickly changed. Adele was awake, watching her move about the room.

“Don’t you have business to attend to?” she asked, picking up her clothes from the previous evening.

“Are you trying to get rid of me?” A smirk stretched across his face.

“Yes, I need to change the sheets.”

“Why? They smell perfectly fine to me. Unless…you’re worried about someone else smelling them.”

His knowing response had her snapping her head in his direction. That was why he had brought her to her room! He wanted Loki to know what happened.

“I’m not sure what you mean but if you are referring to Loki, I told you, we don’t have that kind of relationship.”

“Maybe not, but as a man, I know he wants more from you. Consider this marking my territory.”

“Don’t be a neanderthal. Get dressed and get out of my room.”

Adele chuckled good-naturedly. “Yes, ma’am.”

Gathering up his clothes, he placed a gentle kiss against her temple and slipped from the room. Nakaba hurried to strip the sheets and tossed them down the laundry shoot. As she turned around, a wave of dizziness swept over her and she grappled for anything to hold on to. A pair of strong arms grasped her around the waist and she was pulled against a solid frame.

“Shh,” came Loki’s deep voice. “You’re alright now. I’ve got you.”

A sob escaped her as she turned into him and buried her face in his robe. He pulled her against him and held her tightly. They stood that way for several minutes. Finally, Nakaba regained her composure and stood back.

“Thank-you, Loki.” She reached up her hand and ran her fingers through his hair.

Despite her efforts, her hands held Adele’s scent, leftover from disposing the sheets. Loki’s reaction was visceral. He pulled her hands away and stepped back.

“It was nothing, Princess,” he said, a cold edge to his voice. “Anyone would have done the same.”

Nakaba, hurt by his reaction, nodded and tucked her hands behind her back. “I’m sorry…”

“For what?” Loki asked, his silver eyes flashing something just beyond Nakaba’s comprehension. “You were just doing what needed to be done, as you always do.”

“Are you angry?”

“It doesn’t matter what I am. I am insignificant. I do not even have the right to be angry.”

“How can you say that?” Nakaba asked, shocked by his answer. “You are not insignificant and I always care how you feel.”

“What is the point, Nakaba? What can be gained by me having an opinion one way or the other? Are you suddenly able to relieve my fears, my hurts and my anger? Can you take this all-consuming agony away from me?”

Tears filled Nakaba’s eyes again at his passion-filled words. Even with the distance between them, she could see the trembling of his frame. She wanted to wrap her arms around him, to bury him within her soft embrace. But right now, that would be the same as a slap in the face.

“I cannot,” she cried.

“I hope…” he started, fighting past a lump in his throat. “I hope it was worth it. I hope that you are able to accomplish all that you set out to accomplish. And I really hope that my child is given everything that he or she deserves.”

“Loki, are you planning on leaving?” Nakaba’s eyes were wide with barely controlled panic.

“I don’t know,” he answered truthfully. “I don’t know if I can bare to watch someone else raise my child. My every desire, for most of my life, was to be with you and to have a family together. I have stood by you through everything. I know you better than anyone in the world. To take something that was so close to everything I’ve ever wanted and tell me I have to watch someone else enjoy it, is just too much. Ask yourself this. How would you feel if you and Caesar had a child and he took it to raise it with Louise instead? Not only that, you had to watch it everyday. Would you be able to handle it?”

Nakaba collapsed to the floor, deep sobs wracking her frame. “I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry! I know it is selfish. I know I’m the most horrible person to ever live. But, I can’t do this without you. I just can’t. Please, Loki! Please don’t leave me to do this all alone. Where will I be without you?”

Loki closed his eyes. He couldn’t bare her tears. Dropping to his knees he pulled her into his arms. He didn’t promise her anything but he knew, deep in his soul, he would never leave her. Even without words, Nakaba knew this as well. The pounding of his heart against her ear was promise enough.

Loki no longer visited Nakaba’s chambers. Several weeks had passed since she consummated her marriage and the ajin did not want to be anywhere near the place it had happened. Not only that, since allowing Adele into her bed, the prince visited her often. She never spoke of it, and anytime she was near Loki she made sure to remove any trace of her lover. Still, Loki knew what was happening. While he did not fault Nakaba, the pain created a hollow pit within him.

He sought the company of village women to keep his mind off what he really wanted but it only made him feel more hollow, especially given that they treated him as little more than a pet. The day Nakaba broke the news of her pregnancy, Loki was visiting the marketplace. He wasn’t there for anything specific. He just didn’t want to be near the palace. In fact, he had avoided it for days. Nakaba had called for him a few times but he ignored the whistle. Deep down, he wanted her to hurt, to believe, for just a short time, that he had left. He wanted her to feel at least a fraction of what he felt as he watched his world crumble around him.

Perhaps because of his absence, Nakaba did not tell him she was informing Adele. Maybe that was why she had called him. The news traveled from the palace and into the village streets where midwives and old crones gushed over the news. The younger women took the news and spread it far and wide. Before long, everyone within the walls of Senan knew Nakaba was carrying prince Adele’s child.

I wonder what they would say if they knew it was my child growing within her? Loki thought, disgusted at the gossipers. Turning from them, he made his way to the palace. He couldn’t avoid her forever.

Nakaba paced the floor of the hall. She didn’t want to tell anyone of her pregnancy until she had spoken with Loki but Adele suspected something was wrong when she couldn’t keep anything down. She’d held out for as long as she could, hoping Loki would come back from wherever he was. When he didn’t answer her call, something he had never done, she knew she had to tell the prince.

Where are you, Loki? she thought. You promised you wouldn’t leave. She had bitten her nails down to stubs and now chewed at the skin of her fingers. Almost a week he had been gone and Nakaba’s nerves were shot. She had never been this long without her closest companion. But Nakaba understood why Loki kept his distance. She knew allowing Adele entrance into her bedchamber would change their relationship. The prince visited Nakaba most nights and she had no excuse to refuse him. At least none she could admit to. Nakaba missed Loki’s constant companionship. Not having him by her side made her feel all alone.

“Nakaba, love. Is everything all right?” Adele asked, coming up to her. “You are pacing a hole in the floor.”

Nakaba looked up at the prince, concern etched across his face. She sighed and stopped pacing. He had been the perfect gentleman and the news of her pregnancy had put him on cloud nine. She did not want to do anything to upset him.

“I’m just worried about Loki,” she said, honestly.

“I’m sure he is fine. Probably off to find someone else to occupy his time.”

“Probably. But he’s never been gone this long. What if he left for good?”

Adele smirked. “Well, then…good riddance. I didn’t like him hanging out with you all the time anyway.”

“Adele! Loki is my friend.” Nakaba’s old spirit flared and she threw daggers at the prince with her eyes.

“Ah, there’s my girl! Do you feel better now?”

“No. Now I’m worried and angry.” Turning toward the window, Nakaba crossed her arms and huffed.

Adele, trying to appease his wife, wrapped his arms around her. “The ajin will come back once he has licked his wounds. I wouldn’t worry about him. I’ve seen him in action. Nothing is going to happen to him.”

“I hope you’re right.”

Adele kissed her on the top of the head and released her. “I have to go out of the palace for a few days. Will you be okay while I’m gone?”

“Yes. My ladies do a good job of taking care of me.”

“Good. I will see you when I get back then.” He kissed her deeply and then disappeared down the hall.

Nakaba turned back to the window, bringing her fingers back to her mouth. Loki, where are you?

That evening, Nakaba sat on her balcony as she had done so many times before. Leaning her head back against the balcony wall, she closed her eyes and activated her Arcana of Time. She wanted to see if she could figure out where Loki was.

She stood in a dark hallway full of doors. Moving toward them, she found them all locked. Her feet echoed as she made her way from one door to the next. As she was about to give up, a wolf appeared in front of her. The animal stood majestically a few feet away, its silver eyes reflecting the little light in the hall. Nakaba knew instinctively that it was Loki but the wolf did not move or speak. It just stood, frozen in time.

Nakaba took a step toward him and he vanished.

No! she cried and began running.

She didn’t want to be all alone. Tears filled her eyes as she thought about never seeing her beloved Loki again.

The anguished sob that pushed her out of her Arcana of Time echoed off the palace walls and down into the streets. One sob led to another and before long, she was doubled over, her head against the concrete floor and tears streaming from her eyes. Strong arms pulled her against a warm chest and Nakaba knew Loki had come back to her. She cried harder with the realization that he had come to her at her chambers where Adele resided most nights. He just held her and stroked her back.

“I thought you had left,” she sobbed. “I though I was all alone.”

“I know,” was all he said.

For many minutes he held her, until the worst of her anguish had passed. She look at him with red-rimmed eyes. His stoic face was so foreign to her that she pulled back. He showed neither calmness like he once did, or anger, or sadness. In fact, his face showed no emotion at all. Even his eyes reflected no emotion back. Nakaba had always loved his eyes because she could tell how he was truly feeling by looking into them. Now, they were empty.

“Loki…”

The ajin stood and held out a hand to her. “You called?”

Nakaba took his hand and got to her feet. A spark of anger at his nonchalance flared in her chest. “Yes, several times.”

“I am here.” He bowed stiffly.

“Have you heard the news?”

Loki, still bowing, grit his teeth together. “Everyone has heard the news, my princess.”

“Loki, look at me.”

The ajin stood again and looked just past her. Nakaba narrowed her eyes and moved to stand mere inches from him. There! A flicker of anger in his silver orbs. She sighed and wrapped her arms around his stiff form.

“I missed you,” she whispered.

Loki sighed as well. He could never stay mad at her. “I will not leave you unless you tell me to go. And even then, it will be a hard thing for me to do.”

Nakaba pulled back slightly and looked up at him, threading her fingers through his hair. Loki’s breath hitched at the feeling of her fingers against his ears and the back of his neck. He finally looked at her and his eyes flared with passion. No one could ignite that fire in him they way Nakaba did. Lifting her up, he carried her to the bed, his mouth finding hers along the way. Both Nakaba and Loki knew it was wrong. Nakaba belonged to Adele in every way but Loki had claimed her first. In his mind, he was simply reclaiming what was already his.