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Back-To-Basics Screenwriting With Snappy
Published: 2012-09-14 15:57:53 +0000 UTC; Views: 12114; Favourites: 578; Downloads: 1589
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A DD!! I'd like to thank you all sincerely for embracing my inner asshole and I hope it serves you well. I may not be able to get back to everyone who faves it, but seriously, BIG HUG. Full Title: Back-To-Basics Screenwriting With Snappy (Or, Why The Biz Might Not Be For You)
Written because the Deviantart Scripts & Screenplays section makes me want to put my head through a wall. Repeatedly.
Hope this helps you, minions. If you have any more questions, feel free to let me know.
Ironically, I wasn't going to upload a PDF to facilitate viewing, but then I remembered DA's upload system sucks and I didn't want to reformat the dialogue, so, you get a PDF anyway.
For anyone who's actually interested in film school, I highly recommend the Vancouver Film School's Writing for Film & Television program. All my props come from there.
Ps. Please let me know about any typos; I admit I uploaded this hastily and PDFs are annoying to change.
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Comments: 213
well... sort of. her character is a type 13 TARDIS/Time Lord metacrisis called the Artist, and it's a long story but we need to write screenplay and this is BRILLIANT!!
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A very enjoyable read. I've never thought about writing anything, much less a screenplay, but it was interesting! 
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It's interesting that so many non-writers have checked it out and stuck around to read it!
Thank you very much.
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wow... i've never written a screenplay, i've never wanted to write a screenplay, and i know absolutely nothing about them, but i just read this, all the way through, word for word.
You know why?
This is good.
You have SUCH a strong voice. I can HEAR you talking to me through the internet, telling me to shut the hell up!
^_^
You write seriously well! Keep it up!
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Hahaha, well, I'm glad I could keep you entertained.
Thanks for that! You flatter me.
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XD you're welcome!
Thanks for entertaining me!
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I'm currently in film school, I went in hoping screenwriting would be my easy class cause I write other stuff so well, and got a rude awakening.
in this article you did my first three weeks of classes. and that is awesome. It's also way more entertaining than hearing my classmates ask the same questions over and over.
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Are you trying to be a professional screenwriter or something else film-related?
Glad I could help. Those classes can be frustrating if they aren't taught properly.
Thanks!
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After two semesters and starting to get it, I'm going into screenwriting. In the two year program I'm going to, for your first year you do everything, then second year you pick a focus. The students who didn't get it and asked the same questions over and over were the ones who "hate writing" and were there against their will. (On the one hand I understand the programs rationale, if you've never tried something how do you know you like/hate it. On the other hand I wonder about some kid who could desperately use the mentoring, workshopping and feedback that isn't getting it.)
I've been told that despite my early struggles I should go into screenwriting by most of the writing faculty, so that is going to be my focus next fall.
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Good for you! I don't know about your school, but at mine, the screenwriting department was the best, because writers are realists, so our instructors didn't teach us any BS and got right down what's really happening in the industry right now. (Ie, They didn't shy away from telling us that there is NO industry in Canada, and if you can get the hell out, do it.)
Happy scriptwriting.
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"because that is the first thing professionals see..." and "the soulless Hollywood exec people should expect to deal with in the real world..."
~ from your comments
I read some of the comments on this piece, and no one should feel offended by any real or implied harshness in your tutorial here. I mean, I've never dealt with anyone in the entertainment industry, but it's the "real world" out there, no matter what industry one finds themselves in. And often folks aren't very nice...or at the least, they are professional: cut to the chase; no time for your B.S.; next...
That being said...I've mused over the idea of writing a script. Even an indie flick would be sweet! And I'm working on my writing chops. But in reality, what are the chances that an unknown would get a foot in the door in Hollywood?
Thanks for sharing your expertise! And huge congrats on your DD!!!
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There will always be someone who gets offended by something. That's the general rule.
To answer your question, it depends on what you're willing to do to get there/ who you know. I'm currently on my first "Hollywood" gig right now with a legit director, and I honestly have to say it was mostly luck that got me here. My classmate, who I got along well with and who liked my writing, is American, and after VFS, he got an internship with this company. After awhile, he got hired on full-time as their head of development, and then gave him carte blanche to hire writers for their current projects. Anyway, they had a remake in mind and Dan thought of me. So, I guess if you're a good, hardworking writer, whose good at networking, good at saying "yes" and willing to start work at low/no pay, there's hope yet. 
Thanks very much for the comment, mate!
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Hey, that's great! Good for you!! I hope it works out well for you. And you never know, you may end up writing a huge blockbuster someday. It's neat how all those things came together to make this gig possible.
Thanks for the thoughtful, informative reply. It gives me some hope that folks can make it out there.
And you're welcome!
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Chirp, congrats on the DD, it's been twittered.
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Absolutely wonderful: really funny and useful. I dont think I'm gonna write a script, but in that case I will strictly adhere these rules
Thanks, mate!
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Glad you enjoyed it. Thanks so much!
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I'm not a screenwriter, I'm just a regular writer, but this was an interesting read. I think the thing you're talking about no internal narration in movies can also apply to novels. A lot of writers use too much internal monologue and musings. And I think, if a movie can do it with none, then you can cut down a lot of introspection in a novel and just cut to the chase.
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True, any sort of internal monologue slows down the pace immensely. I forget what I was reading -- it might be in Stephen King's On Writing -- but it was some author who was going about his experience in dabbling in screenwriting, and saying that he doesn't think novelists should approach their manuscripts in any different manner. The pacing should be the same. You should still get in and out of a scene as quickly as possible. All good rules that work for both mediums.
Thanks!
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now that's interesting. Screenwriting is all about what you see and hear instead of what goes on beneath. When I was younger and writing on a book I used a similar technique... I made the reader feel something by producing images in his/her head instead of describing these emotions themselves.
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Well, technically it's ABOUT what goes on beneath, but it's being shown rather than told explicitly. It can be pretty detached, but depending on the sort of novel, I think it can work as well. Noirs and detective stories and things that require a limited perspective, for instance.
Thanks for the comment!
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I've never even considered becoming a screenwriter (and for good reason) but this was a very interesting read nonetheless.
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Thanks for reading! It's fun to hear from non-writers. What's that "good reason" might I ask?
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Ah well, I am a writer, but it's secondary to visual arts. I tend to be ultra descriptive... so writing something so blunt and open as a script just isn't my cup o' tea.
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Ah, I gotcha. One of those people. 
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Sort of like illustrating with a permanent marker and printer paper: you've gotta move on. For me it's a helpful exercise but frustrating as heck.
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You bet. But it sure pays off when it works.
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i JUST joined the film production club today. PERFECT timing.
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Rock on, hope it comes in handy for you. Enjoy your film club!
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I sure hope it does!
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I didn't read it yet, since I'm sitting at my iPad, but I und stand you, I for myself took screenwriting class in ninth grade(aka last year lol). Although I must say that most people just don't know, that's why I think your idea is great, so other people can learn how to write a screenplay correctly too, and don't have to depend on their school to provide such a class. (:
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Wow, I wish my school had a screenwriting course in the ninth grade! Or any grade for that matter. I just went to film school.
Hope you enjoy when you read it.
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Its Great! Ive read it yesterday. (: yeah we could choose it for enrichment, so instead of having an hour more to do homework we learned how to write screenplays, it was really great and it covered all the basics and information about all the angles and everything! Our teacher was really great!
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I ... fucking love this. I myself am a writer, and find every bit of this so true and telling that it isn't funny XD Bravo, bravo.
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Thanks so much! Glad you enjoyed it.
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You are welcome ^_^ You deserved the DD .3.
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I'm a high school student, and I just have to say... thank you for making me feel like an idiot now rather than later, when I'm hopefully a film major. This is by far the most helpful thing I have ever read on screenwriting. Thanks!
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It'll look good when you go into your film program with a knowledge of format, for sure. Good luck, and thanks so much!
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All I can say is THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU. I see so many people doing this wrong, and this will definitely help. I took a screenwriting class, and this was basically the whole semester summarized neat and tidy in one little PDF. I can't wait to share with some people who I took the class with as a little cheat sheet reminder. I'm certain they'll love it.
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It's amazing how long I hear some of these courses take to teach format. We had an entire week of classes dedicated to format, in which our teacher sort of laid out all the basics, and then we applied it to an assignment, and that was that.
Thanks very much! Glad you liked it.
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...Very useful! Congrats on the DD!
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That's awesome
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I'm delighted it could entertain you.
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