HOME | DD

Description
I grow up with two very modey women and a violent brother. I sick of being judged and blamed. I sick of being screamed at and chased after while you scream "I'm going to kill you!!" I do fight back and I don't scream. I just sit/stand there and take it. Sometimes all I have to do is talk to my sister and she screams at me and calls me names.

My mother dated my grade four teacher for four or five years. I started when I was in grade four (my sister had him the year before). He and I were great friends. I was like a daughter to him. When they broke up I use to see him on my way from the bus stop going home from school. One day Jay and I went to see him and he bagged the shit out of my mother. When my mother found out she went crazy. He was so jealous of her new boyfriend. He was so bitter but turned it all back on us.

My dad dated a women out of the newspaper. after a year she moved in with my dad. She had two girls. We didn't get on. She hated my sister and I. I was like hell to visit my dad. She was a fat, ungly lazy slob. The house was a bomb site(when they finally washed down the cupboards, the clean ones were white and the others were brown). In the girls room you couldn't ever see the floor. The would steal our Christmas and Easter chocolates when we went home. My dad's family hated her and hardly got to see us most of all at christmas. My dad finally left her last christmas. My sister and I weren't allowed to go over because she blamed us. She tried to kill herself to make him come back. I cried the day I rang my dad and he called me Jeremy. He always knew it was me ringing and never forgot to pick us up.

Life is shit and there is nothing you can do about it.

In my life I have seen two dead bodies and been to three (and a dog's) out of the eight funeral that happened in 13 months.
My grandmother, Aunty Georgina's Mother in law, Gary's Dad, Faye's mother, my grandfather, jaffa (dog), Aunty Cris and Matt's dad.

How do people deal with that. well people like me don't. I'm getting there now though. So don't you tell me that what I feel is wrong cause I've felt it all.

"I drank your poison cause you told me it's wine
Shame on you if you fouled me once
Shame on me if you fouled me twice
I didn't know the price
You'll get your eventually
So what good am I to you if I can't be broken."
Eventually by Pink

I don't even know who I am. all I know is that for some reason I'm meant to be here. I should of died that day I hit my head on that brick. well any lower and I would be in a wheel chair. I am special and I'm meant to be here and you can't tell me different. Bitches get in my way but they better watch out because I'm here for some reason. Once that reason is found I will leave. I'm sure of that. Someone or something keeps saving me and I'm going to find out why.

Why you may ask am I Spardiel's favourite Writer or poet, I really don't know. Maybe because I write my feelings on paper and have a why to express and analysis all of it. Someone once told me that I could express and analysis my feelings better than most adults (he deals with peoples subconscious feelings).

"This is my Vietnam
I'm at war
Life keeps on dropping bombs and I keep score.
This is my Vietnam
I'm at war
They keeps on dropping bombs and I keep score."
My Vietnam by Pink

I'm nothing perfect. I just want to be left alone. Stay out of my way and I will stay out of yours. I only course trouble if you do first. I don't want to be you hell I don't even want to be me. I just want my life with my husband and my future children ( I love you very much Frosty). Is that too much to ask? So just leave us the hell alone.

Till I write again remember that anyone can help you but only you can save yourself.

Love Spardiel's wife, Rei

wordcourt - 748

Description
I grow up with two very modey women and a violent brother. I sick of being judged and blamed. I sick of being screamed at and chased after while you scream "I'm going to kill you!!" I do fight back and I don't scream. I just sit/stand there and take it. Sometimes all I have to do is talk to my sister and she screams at me and calls me names.

My mother dated my grade four teacher for four or five years. I started when I was in grade four (my sister had him the year before). He and I were great friends. I was like a daughter to him. When they broke up I use to see him on my way from the bus stop going home from school. One day Jay and I went to see him and he bagged the shit out of my mother. When my mother found out she went crazy. He was so jealous of her new boyfriend. He was so bitter but turned it all back on us.

My dad dated a women out of the newspaper. after a year she moved in with my dad. She had two girls. We didn't get on. She hated my sister and I. I was like hell to visit my dad. She was a fat, ungly lazy slob. The house was a bomb site(when they finally washed down the cupboards, the clean ones were white and the others were brown). In the girls room you couldn't ever see the floor. The would steal our Christmas and Easter chocolates when we went home. My dad's family hated her and hardly got to see us most of all at christmas. My dad finally left her last christmas. My sister and I weren't allowed to go over because she blamed us. She tried to kill herself to make him come back. I cried the day I rang my dad and he called me Jeremy. He always knew it was me ringing and never forgot to pick us up.

Life is shit and there is nothing you can do about it.

In my life I have seen two dead bodies and been to three (and a dog's) out of the eight funeral that happened in 13 months.
My grandmother, Aunty Georgina's Mother in law, Gary's Dad, Faye's mother, my grandfather, jaffa (dog), Aunty Cris and Matt's dad.

How do people deal with that. well people like me don't. I'm getting there now though. So don't you tell me that what I feel is wrong cause I've felt it all.

"I drank your poison cause you told me it's wine
Shame on you if you fouled me once
Shame on me if you fouled me twice
I didn't know the price
You'll get your eventually
So what good am I to you if I can't be broken."
Eventually by Pink

I don't even know who I am. all I know is that for some reason I'm meant to be here. I should of died that day I hit my head on that brick. well any lower and I would be in a wheel chair. I am special and I'm meant to be here and you can't tell me different. Bitches get in my way but they better watch out because I'm here for some reason. Once that reason is found I will leave. I'm sure of that. Someone or something keeps saving me and I'm going to find out why.

Why you may ask am I Spardiel's favourite Writer or poet, I really don't know. Maybe because I write my feelings on paper and have a why to express and analysis all of it. Someone once told me that I could express and analysis my feelings better than most adults (he deals with peoples subconscious feelings).

"This is my Vietnam
I'm at war
Life keeps on dropping bombs and I keep score.
This is my Vietnam
I'm at war
They keeps on dropping bombs and I keep score."
My Vietnam by Pink

I'm nothing perfect. I just want to be left alone. Stay out of my way and I will stay out of yours. I only course trouble if you do first. I don't want to be you hell I don't even want to be me. I just want my life with my husband and my future children ( I love you very much Frosty). Is that too much to ask? So just leave us the hell alone.

Till I write again remember that anyone can help you but only you can save yourself.

Love Spardiel's wife, Rei

wordcourt - 748