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Published: 2006-04-05 03:07:36 +0000 UTC; Views: 254; Favourites: 0; Downloads: 8
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My arms move. I don’t know how they keep going, but they move. Faster and harder, they strike. I can’t remember where…who…what am I doing? Strike…punch…feint…My world, I see the end of my world. Blurry lines, red… so much red. Block…feint…I remember why, I remember to remember why. My goal is to punch, harder! That’s what he said: harder! What was his name? Ah…my world is shaken.One…two…three angels? No, one angel and two demons. “THREE!” what? Three? Three angels? I only see one… you’re wrong. I see the demon gesturing, it blocks out the angel. It seems upset; I hope I didn’t anger it. What am I supposed to do? It won’t stop yelling at me… another demon stands by it, waiting. Waiting for me. For me, it waits. For me… Harder! That’s what he said…wait! I remember, no! “SEVEN!” She said…she said she would wait for me. If I…I remember. I have to remember. Ah, won’t he stop yelling at me? If I stand up, will you stop? “NINE” Look, I’m up? Do you see? Do you see, Samantha? I remember, my world is around me. I remember, I look up to the angel. I remember, I look at my demon.
I pant heavily and my sweat falls, making a small pool at my feet. I remember what to do. I raise my fists and I remember. Feint…block…block…Harder! He said. I can’t hold back any longer. I strike out. She told me…I punch out… if I win….he falls, finally my demon no longer stands. The gong sounds and I sit on my throne. At the edge of the world, I remember. Samantha said she would love me. Was it hard enough? Yes, I think it was. A cloth is draped on my shoulders and I hear cheering. I hear him say “Atta’ boy, Jack! You did it…” That’s right, I did it. I remembered. I won.
Comments: 1
BluejayBandit [2013-09-17 19:56:48 +0000 UTC]
It is quite confusing indeed, but it all depends the perspective. You need to read it again in order to comprehend it or at least do so with different "eyes". Still, Fuentes tried to mix alot of writing styles in there, there is not only one so it's understandable why it is hard to read.
Nonetheless I really like the way you wrote this, though it was several years ago. It does a good job evoking the First Person narrative in Artemio Cruz.
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