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First things first: I am kidding! This penguin is still single, ladies!

Second, this is partially based on true events. That is, I didn't really say it, but I would've if it came to me at the exact moment I got the call. I actually thought of saying this right after hanging up on the telemarketer, true to form.

Third, I'd like to bring to your attention my special phone. Apparently it has the unique ability to quickly and drastically change in size the longer a conversation goes on. We've lost a few very good tables when it grew to large for them.

So that's it. Just me being cheesy... at a telemarketer's expense.

Description
First things first: I am kidding! This penguin is still single, ladies!

Second, this is partially based on true events. That is, I didn't really say it, but I would've if it came to me at the exact moment I got the call. I actually thought of saying this right after hanging up on the telemarketer, true to form.

Third, I'd like to bring to your attention my special phone. Apparently it has the unique ability to quickly and drastically change in size the longer a conversation goes on. We've lost a few very good tables when it grew to large for them.

So that's it. Just me being cheesy... at a telemarketer's expense.