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GRIEF. By Cleone Ghabach
Set in 5 chapters which are separated by --------
Chapters with more than one poem are separated by a single .
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Chapter 1:
Denial

Inception

It was just like a dream.
I couldn't remember where it started,
Just where it began.
And it began the moment that it ended
With a silver fishing boat

The sunlight warms the sand
As the tide rolls at my feet.
On the water, in the distance
Is a memory so bittersweet

There was the water.
Looking out into an endless blue,
Ebbing
And flowing
And rising
And crashing.

From the depths, an island rises
A few feet from the shore.
Now I am standing there
With that man
Who I once knew before.

There was a ghost
Who held my hand
And carried me on his shoulders

On a dark and stormy night
As the darkened clouds collide,
One flash of light was all it took,
To rid him from my life

It all began where it ended,
In his silver fishing boat.
Like a dream,
As if it never even happened.

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Bargaining

Dandelion

I Close my eyes and make a wish,
When I catch that dandelion

When I let it go,
I'll watch it float into the air
As I begin to rise.
Higher and higher,
Above and
Beyond.
Gliding, floating,
Flying,
Like I never thought
I could

I open my eyes
And let it go,
That dandelion,
As it carries all my hopes
And dreams

I watch,
As my aspirations
Float away
Like ashes in the wind,
And all my faith
Is lost in time
Like tears
In the rain

Here I am
Suspended
In time
And space,
As the earth still rotates
And it all keeps
Moving on

I closed my eyes and made a wish,
When I lost my grip,
And began to fall.

.

Well

I Close my eyes and make a wish
Sending what my heart desires
To my fingertips
And holding it
To the coin

As I let it fall
I watch myself
Submerge
Within the waters
Of the well

As the water breaks
There is no turning back
And not an ounce of hope of
Resurfacing, as I start
Sinking to the bottom.
Drowning in lies
And false pretence

I closed my eyes and made a wish,
For that missing piece
Inside.

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Anger

Ten

One
Moment
Was all it took
To tear apart
My heart

Two
Types of people,
The violent
The silent,
Both on the verge
Of implosion

Three
Long hours
Every night,
Grieving
Cannot sleep

Four
Fragmented memories
Like broken glass
Slashing at
My soul

Five
Simple steps
Is all it takes
(So they say)
Five simply
Empty lies

Six
Long hours
Every night,
Grief stricken
Insomnia

Seven
Days
Of rage.
Forever falling
From grace

Eight
Broken knuckles
Praising abhorrence,
Hail the
Antagonists

Nine
Long hours
Every night.
Barely breathing
Chocked up cries,
Tear out my eyes,
All I can see
Is red

Ten
Seconds
And counting,
Until every urge
Is subdued
And every man
Is dead

.

Teeth

So it starts
With a minor irritation.
It progresses with
Every motion
Gone to waste,
Until the teeth are grinded
Into dust

Every word they say
Brings the mind
Toward its edge,
Brings logic
To its end,
And sanity
Is brought to death

Picture it,
The enemies
Burning.
Their tortured screams
In agony.
Imagine they are
Drowning,
In their very own
Wasted space.
They can't see
What the mind is building.
They won't know
What could possibly
Await them.
Give it time
They'll be learning
The consequences
Of provoking
A broken heart.

Every inch
Of the human body
Is suddenly over come,
Empowered by the urge
To inflict destruction.
It is as if the heart is pumping rage
Through the very veins
That gives a new power to every muscle,
The power to kill.
Tension builds within the mind
Until the skull is literally throbbing.
The pain intensifies
To the extent to which the purpose
Becomes indistinct but the motive
Remains translucent.

Alas, the motion is gone to waste,
As the teeth are grinded
Into dust.

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Depression

Silence

Silence.
A deafening roar
Of a thousand insects.
Crawling in my skull,
Nesting in my brain,
Feeding off my thoughts.
Slowly moving
Through my veins,
Drinking every ounce
Of self control
Until I cannot move
At all.

I am a prisoner, a victim
Of a predator that is feasting on my very being.
But I am human
And that is my downfall,
I am not trapped in my body
But trapped in my mind,
That has given form as
A thousand insects
Gnawing at my soul.
I am screaming on the inside
But the world hears nothing at all... Except
Silence.

.

Reminisce

A picture frame, an endless stare,
All the proof of what was there,
Once upon a time

No longer alive, in my eyes,
Former existence,
Doubts, denies.
A figure of promise,
Such horrible lies
Bleak and empty across the skies

Image of importance,
Remains unknown
Bits and pieces
Has memory shown,
A scent, a sight, a sound once owned
A shadow, a sorrow, all alone

What was there
That now is gone, taken
To the great beyond.
What memories
Have been left behind
That will help me carry on?

With every passing moment
Of each and every day,
Of every single minute
That takes it all away.
Tomorrow brings new memories
Replacing the yesterday,
As easily as closing doors
To leave me with
A picture frame,
An endless stare,
All the proof of what was there,
But isn't, anymore.

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Acceptance

Consciousness

Somewhere down the track,
I had lost myself, as I was falling
Into a bottomless pit
Of misery

Somewhere down the track,
I had let myself be so overcome with grief
That I had failed to really see
The beauty that lay all around me

Somewhere down the track,
I had walked a path of bush and bramble,
Bleeding through the thorns
And delving deeper and deeper with every step...

But somehow,
Despite the pain that held me down,
Somehow my heart, my mind and my soul had retreated
From its inner battle and instead became allies
Against a greater sadness

So somewhere down the track,
I learned to relieve my grasp on what terribly hurts my heart,
Letting it slip from my fingers
Into the murky depths of the bay.

Because I know,
When my time comes
Someday,

I will be standing
With that man
Who I once knew before.