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Today was supposed to be nice.

Voices echoed from one corner of the heavily packed market to another. Bidders screeched their claims and merchants attracted shoppers with merchandise from everywhere. Kingsvale was a lively city. It was always like this, even when midnight peaked. We were here to pick up cloth. It was a plaza-like area with carts in a circle selling specifically crafting material. Only one booth was crowded which was the gemstone booth. Blacksmiths would clog up this particular plaza just get one of an aristocrat's marvelous “dawn stones”. I have never touched one, however, I heard they’re hot to the touch.
I’d have to focus on the issue at hand, escorting my young sister to the cloth booth without her settling on her injured leg. I looked at her and smiled. “Are you holding up ok?” I asked. I could always just carry her. She always refused with the attitude of a superior. I only wanted to help her. “Yes, I’m fine,” she grumbled. I always worried about her. She had several scratches on her cheeks and cuts in her leafs. It was normal for such a fragile thing, but was being fragile normal? She stumbled a bit I raised her up the best way I could. For something so feisty she seemed to be slipping. Her ears were folded most of the time and they were grey, some brown spots were even appearing.
Once again I took my mind off of this as we continued toward a merchant selling cloth. They were a tall bug with gentle leaves shelters its thin frame. There were a few others in line buying cloth, this wouldn’t be a problem. I sat down and waited for the line to move and my sister followed my position. “Thank you, Finn,” she muttered quietly. Her voice was raspy. I took note of her gratitude but I couldn’t help but notice that she seemed like she was about to cough. She wheezed instead. “That cold still bothering you?” I asked. She nodded. “It’s a good thing you’re getting some sunlight then. Have you been taking your medicine or just working yourself to death?” I joked.
She ignored me as the line moved up. I hate when she does that. All of a sudden I heard a familiar buzzing sound and a familiar voice. I wanted to turn around, and greet her with a nice hello but would Sketch like that? Either way, I decided to press on further in the line and so did Sketch. The voice got louder until I could smell her. At least she toned down on the perfume, but only by a few squirts. My fins twitched and I gently nudged Sketch further up the line. She seemed annoyed by this but I didn’t care. I had to keep them both separate as long as I could. I didn’t want to witness another accident.
Finally, it was our turn to purchase cloth. I sat down as Sketch limped to the counter. I closed my eye for a second and there she was, threatening Sketch. I grumbled and flared my fins in anger, but guilt. I couldn’t prevent her from doing what she was doing, I’d get in trouble for messing with an officer.
With a light thud, Sketch fell to the ground. She struggled to raise up. She was dizzy with pain and anger all at once. Her money was sprawled all over the paved ground. “I’ve told you before and I’m telling you again to keep off my turf, dear. Little twigs like yourself aren’t allowed in this plaza!” the espeon stood tall. She was muscular for her usually nimble species. There she was. She wore a jet-black choker that reached to her chin to her chest. Her loose hanging whiskers tied together with dark purple ribbons. Above her hovered a ribombee with their arms folded. Why Sketch wasn’t welcomed here is puzzling to me. She would be allowed if she’d keep her mouth shut. I wanted to intervene but I couldn’t so as soon as Sketch moved up, I decided to grab up her money. At least I’d be able to salvage them before a thief or petty merchant spotted the sparkling coins.
“It’s really pitiful you show your face here, Twig,” she wavered her split tail, and gave Sketch a threatening gaze. My little sister was hardly able to regain ground. She stumbled with every attempt to get up. “Ruby, you go ahead and pay for your things. I’ve got to take care of this,” she turned her head and the bug fairy nodded and faced the merchant, who was rather in shock of the abrupt move. “Oh you look so stupid with the glasses,” she said in a ridiculous voice. She did as if to pretend to pity Sketch. My sister finally managed to get on her paws. She didn’t utter a word. “So tell me Sketch, did you come here to buy cloth. You’d think that if you worked for someone with such power you’d be able to wish cloth from thin air. However it isn’t that simple is it,” She moved in closely with a grin on her face as she spoke. “Ugh your so STUCK UP!” Sketch finally spat and she swung at her. The espeon easily countered her attack and grabbed Sketch by the ear and swinging her to the center of the plaza. This drew the entire plaza’s attention. “You have to waltz right here at the wrong place and the wrong time. It’s a shame. You must’ve spent hours here limping and dragging your leg here,” her voice seemed to increase in volume so the new crowd could hear her. “Opal,” the ribombee called. She was finished and struggling to hold a few rolls of pink cloth. Opal ignored Ruby and quickly pressed on her teasing. “I’ve told you once, Twig. Little girls aren’t allowed in this part of town. I’m only telling you for your own safety. How would such a small thing be able to protect herself against thieves who were lurking in the allies? You can’t even help yourself from getting pickpocketed by an argon!” she teased. Her white teeth bared arrogantly. I cast a worried glance. I had to witness her be swung once more. “I’m sick of you!” Sketch hissed again. “Well, the feelings mutual!” she teased.
Opal is a skilled psychic. She’s able to move small buildings with ease. For her species, killing a fragile grass nymph is a breeze. Killing Sketch would be nothing by a draft. I had collected all of Sketch’s money. It resided in my tail, floating about. It was wet but it was still worth something. I stared back at the battle, there was a crowd so thick. I couldn’t see her. All I could hear were subtle grunts, Sketch’s little muzzle whining for mercy.
I pushed past the crowd to hear yelling. “Sorry!” I muttered, stepping on a merchant’s tail as I shoved my way to the front. I saw what I never wished to see. Sketch’s head was blood and she had several bruises. Her light little chest is breathing fast. Opal steps closer. “Pathetic rat,” Opal said under her breath. “Shame,” a voice whispered from behind. “Are officers really allowed to do that?” a second voice asked. “Not sure, but they do have the right to kill anything they feel as a threat to the shoppers,” a third mewed. “Dang, wonder what the kid did that's making Ms. Opal so upset!” the second voice replied. “Absolutely nothing,” the words were forced out of my muzzle. The sources of the three voices stared at me. “Then what’s the point,” a new rather fresh voice said. He stepped from the shadows of the crowd, shaking off his icy-blue pelt. His voice was muffled because of the bag he was carrying. It was heavy with items like shampoo and chocolate ice cream. He was a little taller than me, despite being an ice nymph. He was rather handsome and sturdy looking. His eyes sparkled at the display. I may have underestimated him, but he appeared to be flirting with death, as Sketch did. He stepped into the clearing. The crowd fell silent. I recognized him. A warlord from the North Island. What was he doing this far south? A meeting with the Monarch, Haiku? It was too hot in her shrine for any ice-type to enter. I was shocked and puzzled. Wouldn’t he be wearing armor if he was a Warlord or was it too hot for that? He didn’t seem to be sweating or in discomfort. Then again it was too far from Haiku’s shrine for it to be steaming hot.
He stared at Opal, he wasn’t going to join in on beating up my sister, thankfully. Or at least it seemed like it. To my surprise, he flicked up his head with the heavy leather bag. Opal was struck with as much shock as the crowd and me. She breathed, baffled. Her nose was bleeding. Opal snickered. “Well, well, you must be new around here!” she purred. She looked him up and down, she had realized it too. He was too familiar. For the first time in awhile, she was struck with fear. She realized who she was dealing with. He swiped his claws at her but she dodged. Small balls of star-lights were summoned around her. “Reach for the stars!” she hissed. The glaceon dropped his bags before she attacked. She fired swiftly. His was faster than she expected. However this particular move, never missed. He was struck on his stone-cold forehead. Baffled by the impact he backed up, shrugging off the temporary pain. She summoned more stars and licked her lips, trying to focus. She fired once more but he took the hit. He really was the warlord up North, I thought. I began to ponder on what his name was. Something beginning with “Y”. I was quickly distracted by the thought when I found Opal in deadlock. She cowered in fear as a beam of ice formed between the nymph’s teeth. He fired knocking Opal in a rush of a cold stream of ice.
She lied closed to Sketch, who was cowering in fear. I rushed to her side and in instinct, I licked the thick blood from her bloody forehead, it seemed to help. The glaceon stepped toward Opal and smirked. She raises up, her side scarred from the gnawing ice. “Hmph, you’re rather strong aren’t you,” she huffed. She was breathing unsteadily, upset by her defeat. “You’re only like that because you’re off the island,” she scoffed. Opal stumbled backward and some members of the crowd quickly came to assist the idol. She smiled as she was carried off the nearest hospital.
Sketch was still curled up, bundled in pain. “Ow, ow it hurts!” she groaned. Her leg was twitching violently. I continued to lick her forehead wound. It worried me more. “Stop that!” she hissed. The glaceon’s shadow cast over us. I stopped as Sketch wished. “T-thank you!” I muttered. Seeing such a display of power was baffling. He saved my sister! I quickly rose up. I hear quick paw steps. A furret snuck past him, interrupting us. “Thanks for ruining it for us, rat!” she hissed as she scuttled passed. Soon the crowd was clear. “Is she-,” I didn’t mean to barge into what he was saying but I couldn’t help myself. “Gosh, how did you pull that off! I’ve never see anyone beat down Opal without chipping away at her or taking a few hits first! That was great! Aren’t you that warlord that lives up north! Could we be friends! I’ll die if you don’t become my friend! You seem like a good person for standing up for-!” I was interrupted by a weak wheeze. “Finn stop that!” she mewed harshly. “Oh, I’m Finn, and this is my little sister, Sketch!” I purred. The glaceon seemed puzzled and confused. Maybe I had asked him a bit too many questions. I heard a small groan from Sketch, I couldn’t indicate if it was out of pain or annoyance. He opens his mouth to answer but I heard a light thud. Sketch! I had completely forgotten about her injuries! I quickly dip beneath her and hoist her on my back.

A critique on my writing ability would be appreciated!
Kind of a test summation for legends-isles I wanted to see how people responded to it and if they like the writing medium. I'll continue the writing medium but I just kind of wanted to see if the flow of the story understandable and if people are able to identify the characters!

Authors Note:

kori belongs to Harukikou
sketch, opal and finn belong to yinmorii
story belongs to/written by Harukikou and yinmorii

current protagonists: kori, finn
supporting characters: sketch
antagonist: opal
misc character: "The Warlord Up North", Unnamed Rimbombee

Description
first(you're here) - next

Today was supposed to be nice.

Voices echoed from one corner of the heavily packed market to another. Bidders screeched their claims and merchants attracted shoppers with merchandise from everywhere. Kingsvale was a lively city. It was always like this, even when midnight peaked. We were here to pick up cloth. It was a plaza-like area with carts in a circle selling specifically crafting material. Only one booth was crowded which was the gemstone booth. Blacksmiths would clog up this particular plaza just get one of an aristocrat's marvelous “dawn stones”. I have never touched one, however, I heard they’re hot to the touch.
I’d have to focus on the issue at hand, escorting my young sister to the cloth booth without her settling on her injured leg. I looked at her and smiled. “Are you holding up ok?” I asked. I could always just carry her. She always refused with the attitude of a superior. I only wanted to help her. “Yes, I’m fine,” she grumbled. I always worried about her. She had several scratches on her cheeks and cuts in her leafs. It was normal for such a fragile thing, but was being fragile normal? She stumbled a bit I raised her up the best way I could. For something so feisty she seemed to be slipping. Her ears were folded most of the time and they were grey, some brown spots were even appearing.
Once again I took my mind off of this as we continued toward a merchant selling cloth. They were a tall bug with gentle leaves shelters its thin frame. There were a few others in line buying cloth, this wouldn’t be a problem. I sat down and waited for the line to move and my sister followed my position. “Thank you, Finn,” she muttered quietly. Her voice was raspy. I took note of her gratitude but I couldn’t help but notice that she seemed like she was about to cough. She wheezed instead. “That cold still bothering you?” I asked. She nodded. “It’s a good thing you’re getting some sunlight then. Have you been taking your medicine or just working yourself to death?” I joked.
She ignored me as the line moved up. I hate when she does that. All of a sudden I heard a familiar buzzing sound and a familiar voice. I wanted to turn around, and greet her with a nice hello but would Sketch like that? Either way, I decided to press on further in the line and so did Sketch. The voice got louder until I could smell her. At least she toned down on the perfume, but only by a few squirts. My fins twitched and I gently nudged Sketch further up the line. She seemed annoyed by this but I didn’t care. I had to keep them both separate as long as I could. I didn’t want to witness another accident.
Finally, it was our turn to purchase cloth. I sat down as Sketch limped to the counter. I closed my eye for a second and there she was, threatening Sketch. I grumbled and flared my fins in anger, but guilt. I couldn’t prevent her from doing what she was doing, I’d get in trouble for messing with an officer.
With a light thud, Sketch fell to the ground. She struggled to raise up. She was dizzy with pain and anger all at once. Her money was sprawled all over the paved ground. “I’ve told you before and I’m telling you again to keep off my turf, dear. Little twigs like yourself aren’t allowed in this plaza!” the espeon stood tall. She was muscular for her usually nimble species. There she was. She wore a jet-black choker that reached to her chin to her chest. Her loose hanging whiskers tied together with dark purple ribbons. Above her hovered a ribombee with their arms folded. Why Sketch wasn’t welcomed here is puzzling to me. She would be allowed if she’d keep her mouth shut. I wanted to intervene but I couldn’t so as soon as Sketch moved up, I decided to grab up her money. At least I’d be able to salvage them before a thief or petty merchant spotted the sparkling coins.
“It’s really pitiful you show your face here, Twig,” she wavered her split tail, and gave Sketch a threatening gaze. My little sister was hardly able to regain ground. She stumbled with every attempt to get up. “Ruby, you go ahead and pay for your things. I’ve got to take care of this,” she turned her head and the bug fairy nodded and faced the merchant, who was rather in shock of the abrupt move. “Oh you look so stupid with the glasses,” she said in a ridiculous voice. She did as if to pretend to pity Sketch. My sister finally managed to get on her paws. She didn’t utter a word. “So tell me Sketch, did you come here to buy cloth. You’d think that if you worked for someone with such power you’d be able to wish cloth from thin air. However it isn’t that simple is it,” She moved in closely with a grin on her face as she spoke. “Ugh your so STUCK UP!” Sketch finally spat and she swung at her. The espeon easily countered her attack and grabbed Sketch by the ear and swinging her to the center of the plaza. This drew the entire plaza’s attention. “You have to waltz right here at the wrong place and the wrong time. It’s a shame. You must’ve spent hours here limping and dragging your leg here,” her voice seemed to increase in volume so the new crowd could hear her. “Opal,” the ribombee called. She was finished and struggling to hold a few rolls of pink cloth. Opal ignored Ruby and quickly pressed on her teasing. “I’ve told you once, Twig. Little girls aren’t allowed in this part of town. I’m only telling you for your own safety. How would such a small thing be able to protect herself against thieves who were lurking in the allies? You can’t even help yourself from getting pickpocketed by an argon!” she teased. Her white teeth bared arrogantly. I cast a worried glance. I had to witness her be swung once more. “I’m sick of you!” Sketch hissed again. “Well, the feelings mutual!” she teased.
Opal is a skilled psychic. She’s able to move small buildings with ease. For her species, killing a fragile grass nymph is a breeze. Killing Sketch would be nothing by a draft. I had collected all of Sketch’s money. It resided in my tail, floating about. It was wet but it was still worth something. I stared back at the battle, there was a crowd so thick. I couldn’t see her. All I could hear were subtle grunts, Sketch’s little muzzle whining for mercy.
I pushed past the crowd to hear yelling. “Sorry!” I muttered, stepping on a merchant’s tail as I shoved my way to the front. I saw what I never wished to see. Sketch’s head was blood and she had several bruises. Her light little chest is breathing fast. Opal steps closer. “Pathetic rat,” Opal said under her breath. “Shame,” a voice whispered from behind. “Are officers really allowed to do that?” a second voice asked. “Not sure, but they do have the right to kill anything they feel as a threat to the shoppers,” a third mewed. “Dang, wonder what the kid did that's making Ms. Opal so upset!” the second voice replied. “Absolutely nothing,” the words were forced out of my muzzle. The sources of the three voices stared at me. “Then what’s the point,” a new rather fresh voice said. He stepped from the shadows of the crowd, shaking off his icy-blue pelt. His voice was muffled because of the bag he was carrying. It was heavy with items like shampoo and chocolate ice cream. He was a little taller than me, despite being an ice nymph. He was rather handsome and sturdy looking. His eyes sparkled at the display. I may have underestimated him, but he appeared to be flirting with death, as Sketch did. He stepped into the clearing. The crowd fell silent. I recognized him. A warlord from the North Island. What was he doing this far south? A meeting with the Monarch, Haiku? It was too hot in her shrine for any ice-type to enter. I was shocked and puzzled. Wouldn’t he be wearing armor if he was a Warlord or was it too hot for that? He didn’t seem to be sweating or in discomfort. Then again it was too far from Haiku’s shrine for it to be steaming hot.
He stared at Opal, he wasn’t going to join in on beating up my sister, thankfully. Or at least it seemed like it. To my surprise, he flicked up his head with the heavy leather bag. Opal was struck with as much shock as the crowd and me. She breathed, baffled. Her nose was bleeding. Opal snickered. “Well, well, you must be new around here!” she purred. She looked him up and down, she had realized it too. He was too familiar. For the first time in awhile, she was struck with fear. She realized who she was dealing with. He swiped his claws at her but she dodged. Small balls of star-lights were summoned around her. “Reach for the stars!” she hissed. The glaceon dropped his bags before she attacked. She fired swiftly. His was faster than she expected. However this particular move, never missed. He was struck on his stone-cold forehead. Baffled by the impact he backed up, shrugging off the temporary pain. She summoned more stars and licked her lips, trying to focus. She fired once more but he took the hit. He really was the warlord up North, I thought. I began to ponder on what his name was. Something beginning with “Y”. I was quickly distracted by the thought when I found Opal in deadlock. She cowered in fear as a beam of ice formed between the nymph’s teeth. He fired knocking Opal in a rush of a cold stream of ice.
She lied closed to Sketch, who was cowering in fear. I rushed to her side and in instinct, I licked the thick blood from her bloody forehead, it seemed to help. The glaceon stepped toward Opal and smirked. She raises up, her side scarred from the gnawing ice. “Hmph, you’re rather strong aren’t you,” she huffed. She was breathing unsteadily, upset by her defeat. “You’re only like that because you’re off the island,” she scoffed. Opal stumbled backward and some members of the crowd quickly came to assist the idol. She smiled as she was carried off the nearest hospital.
Sketch was still curled up, bundled in pain. “Ow, ow it hurts!” she groaned. Her leg was twitching violently. I continued to lick her forehead wound. It worried me more. “Stop that!” she hissed. The glaceon’s shadow cast over us. I stopped as Sketch wished. “T-thank you!” I muttered. Seeing such a display of power was baffling. He saved my sister! I quickly rose up. I hear quick paw steps. A furret snuck past him, interrupting us. “Thanks for ruining it for us, rat!” she hissed as she scuttled passed. Soon the crowd was clear. “Is she-,” I didn’t mean to barge into what he was saying but I couldn’t help myself. “Gosh, how did you pull that off! I’ve never see anyone beat down Opal without chipping away at her or taking a few hits first! That was great! Aren’t you that warlord that lives up north! Could we be friends! I’ll die if you don’t become my friend! You seem like a good person for standing up for-!” I was interrupted by a weak wheeze. “Finn stop that!” she mewed harshly. “Oh, I’m Finn, and this is my little sister, Sketch!” I purred. The glaceon seemed puzzled and confused. Maybe I had asked him a bit too many questions. I heard a small groan from Sketch, I couldn’t indicate if it was out of pain or annoyance. He opens his mouth to answer but I heard a light thud. Sketch! I had completely forgotten about her injuries! I quickly dip beneath her and hoist her on my back.

A critique on my writing ability would be appreciated!
Kind of a test summation for legends-isles I wanted to see how people responded to it and if they like the writing medium. I'll continue the writing medium but I just kind of wanted to see if the flow of the story understandable and if people are able to identify the characters!

Authors Note:

kori belongs to Harukikou
sketch, opal and finn belong to yinmorii
story belongs to/written by Harukikou and yinmorii

current protagonists: kori, finn
supporting characters: sketch
antagonist: opal
misc character: "The Warlord Up North", Unnamed Rimbombee