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Temperance-Demure [9908557] [] "I don't want your Llamas..."

# Statistics

Favourites: 13235; Deviations: 0; Watchers: 24

Watching: 301; Pageviews: 15554; Comments Made: 1920; Friends: 301

# Comments

Comments: 824

Yonaka-Yamako [2015-01-03 17:27:05 +0000 UTC]

Happy birthday.

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Foxtrot44 [2012-03-23 06:04:06 +0000 UTC]

I'm not sure if you remember me but I hope you're doing well. Also I alwas remember you whenever Soul Sister by Train plays on the radio because that was being overplayed when we first met. xD

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Temperance-Demure In reply to Foxtrot44 [2012-03-25 23:38:08 +0000 UTC]

lol that's great. Of course I remember you, How's it going? Things have been pretty...everything on my end. I'll be moving to my Dad's pretty soon because my Mom is moving in with her fiance and our relationship has deteriorated almost to the point of mutual animosity. Lol!

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Foxtrot44 In reply to Temperance-Demure [2012-03-26 22:59:31 +0000 UTC]

College is stressing me out (especially Latin) but regardless I'm quite happy. I'm sorry to hear about your mom. I can't remember if you guys were strained last time we talked or not. How is your girlfriend/fiance/ I can't remember which one/ doing?

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Temperance-Demure In reply to Foxtrot44 [2012-04-10 03:29:13 +0000 UTC]

Ooh! Latin sounds like fun :D (Big Grin) What are you taking that for? What's your major? (if you've decided on one, that is.)

We were on pretty good terms the last time you and I talked, I think but ever since I moved out and moved back in, things took a turn for the worse. It's mostly because I got a taste of what it's like to be on my own and she wants me to do everything around the house but for clean her laundry :/

The GF and I are still going strong. We've had a few close calls due to mutual miscommunication but we survived. We're kinda going through a rough patch right now because we're both stuck in places we can't escape from and we're getting a little jaded. (mostly against the world but it has been known to leak into our relationship now and then :/ )

What about you? I thought you had someone the last time we talked but it's been quite a while since then, lol.

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Foxtrot44 In reply to Temperance-Demure [2012-07-07 17:13:10 +0000 UTC]

I took Latin because I'm required to take 2 semesters of a language as part of my major. My major is history, but I don't know what I want to do with it. Its basically too late to change it now since I'm on my last year too.

Hopefully you'll get to be on your again. I enjoy being in my own apartment especially since I don't have parents barking at me to do things. I hope things have gotten better since we last talked. Sorry I'm not as active as I should be. >_<;

I broke up with my boyfriend of 7 years in May and I've been having a rough time being single so far. I really hope you and your girl are doing well. I'm gad to hear that you are still going even after those close calls.

I'm ok. Summer is not going how I wanted it too. I've been pretty seriously depressed. Not to the point of suicide or anything just I don't know what to do and I'm always overwhelmed with the feeling of lonelyness.

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Temperance-Demure In reply to Foxtrot44 [2012-07-15 04:02:07 +0000 UTC]

Good news! Things are finally starting to look up. I'm a temp right now, working for a company that makes effervescent tablets. It's a really nice job, the people are friendly, and it will pay well if I get hired in. Just the other day the plant manager asked if I'd turned in my application! I don't want to jinx it but I may get an interview and possibly a full time position :D (Big Grin) DDD I could afford to move out of my dad's place and live comfortably for a while. It's so exciting.

I'm sorry to hear that. I know what it's like to be lonely and I wouldn't wish it on anyone. All I can say (and I'm sure it'll be little consolation for you, sorry) is that you're still young and many years lie before you. There will be someone along the way that'll be that perfect piece to fill the empty space but don't go looking for him. Keep your eyes peeled but live your life. Make new friends, learn new things, make life about the experience of being you as a single being. I like to think that if you know who you are and what you want you will draw people to you. And don't beat yourself up over what you had. kay? It'll get better. Promise :D (Big Grin)

Thanks. We've made a lot of progress with our relationship this year already (which is good) but I think it's because we can't get a brake from everybody else. We've gotten to the point where we can't stand anybody we see on a regular basis for various reasons. My parents don't like her and she doesn't particularly like them. I actually hate most of her family because they treat her worse than most would treat a dog. (literally. I'm not exagerating. She's been labeled the 'bastard' of the family, begotten by the black sheep of the family). So, yeah, we're good, lol.

Well, I'm glad that you're not thinking of killing yourself, I really am. Nothing is ever that bad, although it may feel that way. Is there anything that I can do to help? I'm getting pretty serious about herbalism and there are a few plants that I could prescribe that help you cope with depression if it's affecting you that much. Lemon balm is supposed to give you a nice lift. I've only tried it once though. Anyway, just let me know, kay? And hey, if you need to talk, I'm here.

I hope things go better for ya, hon.

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Foxtrot44 In reply to Temperance-Demure [2012-07-15 22:04:07 +0000 UTC]

Congrats on the potential job position!!!!!!! Thats such a great thing to hear from someone, especially in this economy! :D (Big Grin) I really do hope you get it. Keep me updates!

I've felt like trying apologize to him but at the same time I think I'm finally embracing the concept of being single so I'm hesitant to talk to him again. *sigh* Everyone tells me that I'm young and that it gets better. I want to believe it but at the same time it's hard to see the light.

I'm so glad you two have each other! ;3; I'm sorry that there are conflicting family problems....that never helps with stress. The most important thing is that you have each other to support and that you're happy together. :) (Smile)

The furthest I've ever gotten with suicide is contemplation. I have too big of a fear of pain to go through with anything. Its not like that every time I get depressed. Some days depression helps me relax more and think deeply about things and that makes me happy (weird right?). Lemon balm? Is that the name of the plant?? O_O

Thank you for listening to my ramblings. -3-

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Temperance-Demure In reply to Foxtrot44 [2012-07-16 01:39:00 +0000 UTC]

Thanks C: I'm really excited about the potential job because I know now that I'm not a lazy bastard after all, lol. It's a real confidence boost and I needed it.

I think waiting to talk to him again is wise. Get your feet under you before going out on a limb, hey? I know it's hard but hang in there.

I'm glad we have each other too. Without her, I don't know where I'd be. I know for sure though, I wouldn't be as confident as I am; she's the one person that I can be completely myself with. I just can't get over how lucky I am to have found her. I really never thought I'd actually find 'the one' y'know? And we rely on each other when the world decides to dump on us.

I've contemplated suicide a few times (not seriously, but it's definitely crossed my mind) and two things stop me: the thought that I'd be taking the easy way out (when I get lazy, I get mad at myself :/) and I wouldn't just die. My loved ones would have to deal with the after math. I wouldn't wish that on anyone. I'm glad to hear your depression is not always deep and black :D (Big Grin) Perhaps you're just in a mourning period? Yes, the name of the plant is Lemon balm. It smells exactly like a fresh lemon though, perhaps not as strong. You can look it up here: [link] they call it just 'balm'.

Any time. It's no bother.

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Foxtrot44 In reply to Temperance-Demure [2012-07-16 14:47:19 +0000 UTC]

xD You really don't seem like the lazy type at all! When will you hear from them again?

I'll wait. There's a guy I also have feelings for so I should figure that out before I talk to my ex.

Its a great feeling to know that you have someone to take on the world with isn't it? :D (Big Grin) I'm happy for you. :) (Smile)

I'm over my mourning period for the most part. Is it possible to find balm in the US growing naturally?

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Temperance-Demure In reply to Foxtrot44 [2012-07-22 21:07:48 +0000 UTC]

Well, thanks :D (Big Grin) I just had an interview the other day. I'll be moving to third shift late this week or next week :U I'm not a night owl at all but I'm gonna show them that I want the job, regardless. I just can't stop thinking how bad it's gonna suck though, hahaha!

yes, that; lol. Knowing what you want is probably the best place to start. Good luck.

Yes, It's a beautiful feeling. I've never had that before.

I'm afraid it doesn't grow naturally in the US but you can find it almost anywhere plants are sold (just ask for Lemon balm). If you lived closer, I'd just give you some but you can also take the herb as an extract called a tincture. Mountainroseherbs.com sells a bunch of quality stuff and they're very good with costumer service; very nice people. Just take the recommended dose in a cup of water and you're good to go.

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Foxtrot44 In reply to Temperance-Demure [2012-07-24 17:27:36 +0000 UTC]

Job is better than no job ^^

Would a food co-op sell lemon balm?

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Temperance-Demure In reply to Foxtrot44 [2012-08-02 22:59:22 +0000 UTC]

Sorry for the long silence. My internet has been sucking and deviantart hasn't wanted to load :/

I'm adjusting well to third shift (thank god) and I'm just waiting for an apartment to open up so that I can move out. Wooo!

What is a food co-op? Lemon balm grows well from seed if you wanna just order a pack online. Horizon herbs is my favorite place. They're decently priced, very courteous, and they know their shit when it comes to herbs.

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Foxtrot44 In reply to Temperance-Demure [2012-08-13 04:50:36 +0000 UTC]

I apologize too. I've gotten lazy and busy with work and depressed so I've been slacking. :/

Will your girlfriend be moving into the apartment too? I hope work is still going well.

Food coop is basically natural grown foods, no chemicals and such, a lot of various foods and herbs and such. They sell some other things too but I haven't been to one in years.

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Skane-Smeden [2012-02-26 20:29:01 +0000 UTC]