sTuPiD-eLcH In reply to NorthAngel [2012-03-22 10:06:52 +0000 UTC]

you're welcome

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sTuPiD-eLcH In reply to CrestfallenWitch [2012-01-28 20:41:20 +0000 UTC]

you're welcome

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sTuPiD-eLcH In reply to MissAshford [2011-12-15 16:25:55 +0000 UTC]

no, thank you for creating such wonderful art... you're very talented!

and thanks for watching

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MissAshford In reply to sTuPiD-eLcH [2011-12-15 19:12:10 +0000 UTC]

Thank you do much. :3

And it's no problem. :'D

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sTuPiD-eLcH In reply to MissAshford [2011-12-15 22:11:26 +0000 UTC]

dito

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sTuPiD-eLcH In reply to Endzo [2011-04-17 19:42:31 +0000 UTC]

huh? have what?

ur welcome

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sTuPiD-eLcH In reply to Por-fin [2010-10-21 20:17:40 +0000 UTC]

ich bin nich bezaubernd ^^ aber ehrlich bin ich schon, manchmal zu sehr...

danke, ich geb mir mühe...

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sTuPiD-eLcH In reply to Aurorasson [2010-10-18 08:23:37 +0000 UTC]

ur welcome

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sTuPiD-eLcH In reply to ilovechibi123 [2010-09-10 07:42:27 +0000 UTC]

uhm... xièxie... <_<

how come u know chinese? thought u know japanese...

btw... im my head u sang like a chinese trying to talk english just by reading the text <_<

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ilovechibi123 In reply to sTuPiD-eLcH [2010-09-10 20:09:20 +0000 UTC]

Ahh Japanese would be moar like..
Watashi wa pan o tabe masu desu!
/lolololol
oh u mean my engrish? D: Pfft lil boy.
dun speak that way to ur elders XD
respect mai engrish authoritayyy D<

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sTuPiD-eLcH In reply to ilovechibi123 [2010-09-10 21:41:20 +0000 UTC]

no, i just thought about u trying to talk/sing chinese, but not knowing it well... <_<

dunno what engrish is, but if its ur kinda way to say something, than its... exhausting... sometimes...

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sTuPiD-eLcH In reply to ilovechibi123 [2010-09-10 07:38:38 +0000 UTC]

well, uhm... thx

but actually, ur too late <_< i mean, the time u were online was already the next day here... but nvm...

u dont have to do anything for me, u have enough works here...

my birthday wasnt special at all, like always... only like every day... on thursday we go grocery shopping, so we did that, too...
thats all... in the evening i drank a can of whiskey + cola... that was my fan-friggin-tastic b-day...

and i'm old...

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sTuPiD-eLcH In reply to El-Noir-Volk-ng-Yoru [2010-09-09 06:47:00 +0000 UTC]

sure, i am...

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El-Noir-Volk-ng-Yoru In reply to sTuPiD-eLcH [2010-09-09 14:11:31 +0000 UTC]

Nice to know you are.

Anyways, any progress in your pessimism?

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sTuPiD-eLcH In reply to El-Noir-Volk-ng-Yoru [2010-09-09 18:26:49 +0000 UTC]

uhm... only the bad way

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El-Noir-Volk-ng-Yoru In reply to sTuPiD-eLcH [2010-09-10 23:53:39 +0000 UTC]

I don't think that's progress anymore. -.-;

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sTuPiD-eLcH In reply to El-Noir-Volk-ng-Yoru [2010-09-11 09:54:32 +0000 UTC]

hmm... ok... something happened to progress... or the chance is given to let it happen, it only depends on when... but thats something i cant control... i have to wait and hope the day will be soon...

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El-Noir-Volk-ng-Yoru In reply to sTuPiD-eLcH [2010-09-11 11:36:55 +0000 UTC]

You lost me. >.< I think college has dulled my deciphering abilities.

I'm gonna guess that that's a complicated way of saying that progress is something that you have to wait for? And it's something that you are waiting for and hoping that it'll be soon?

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sTuPiD-eLcH In reply to El-Noir-Volk-ng-Yoru [2010-09-11 16:33:30 +0000 UTC]

right... the plan is to move... but i cant do it alone...
now i have the chance to live for few weeks in a friends house, until i have my own flat...

but before i dont have a job, i cant move... so i have to wait for invites and stuff and hopefully anything works well... after that the next problems will come...
the friend is... uhm... my "number one"... i think i told u about her with that name...

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El-Noir-Volk-ng-Yoru In reply to sTuPiD-eLcH [2010-09-12 04:24:17 +0000 UTC]

Well, that's a bit of good news, then. Good luck with that, sincerely. Just don't hole yourself up once you do get a flat of your own.

In the case of job-hunting, it's more on your initiative than just waiting. Trust me. I'm learning from not only my own, by my brother's experiences.

And really? o.o? Is that a good thing?

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sTuPiD-eLcH In reply to El-Noir-Volk-ng-Yoru [2010-09-12 10:59:16 +0000 UTC]

i dont think, my friend would let it happen, that i hole myself up... we will work together on my self-esteem and stuff... <_<

yah, i know... but here we get "tasks" that we have to bring e.g. 5 applications... i'm sure it wont be last time i have to bring 5, so now i have to search for 3 more, to make 5 full and if i find more, i have to keep them for the next task of 5... and then it IS only waiting... sure i can ask after two weeks, if they got it, but i cant do anything to make it faster or to make them want me...

i dont know if its a good thing to live at the "number ones" house and knowing to not getting her ever... or knowing exactly if theres more possible for me... or maybe even more for her...

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El-Noir-Volk-ng-Yoru In reply to sTuPiD-eLcH [2010-09-14 11:38:30 +0000 UTC]

That's great! Moral support paired up with physical support is one of the best to have. ^w^

Tasks? Gah, that sounds hassling. Then again, I find lots of things hassling. And better than doing nothing at all, no? Better to be productive than wasting away.

Frankly, neither do I. Just deal with it, I suppose. Who decided the setup anyway? You or her?

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sTuPiD-eLcH In reply to El-Noir-Volk-ng-Yoru [2010-09-14 12:10:09 +0000 UTC]

hmm... i'm feeling kinda shitty now... a friend said to me, its suicide for me to move to her... now i feel the beginning of suicide... i really need to separate friendship and love... especially with her... or i will die... very painful...

sure, these tasks make sense somehow, but i have a job... they just dont like, that i dont earn enough and have to use money from the state... these guys have secure jobs and a lot of money, they dont care about the "small" people...

well, the "setup" to movee to her was her own idea... i couldnt ever ask her or this... i would have asked her for one night maybe, if i had an invitation... but as i told her the possible cities, she was so euphoric and convinced me to point my future in that direction... and she wants to help me with anything... especially at searching a flat and to furnish it... with paperwork her mom can help me, her mom already gave her okay for all this...
i know its big luck to be supported like this from actual strangers... we never met, so this is kinda stupid to plan... but its my only chance, i guess... i dont wanna rot here...

but the question is, whats better... to rot here or to die there... v_v
did i mention i hate my life...

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El-Noir-Volk-ng-Yoru In reply to sTuPiD-eLcH [2010-09-16 16:10:21 +0000 UTC]

...don't try literal suicide. You'll end up losing a life as well as hurt those around you. And if you feel that way, maybe you should find an alternate housing. One where you can breathe freely, so to speak.

I understand and don't understand. Then again, that's me. And sometimes you just have to ignore what other people think of you.

Then she does care for you, even if it's not in the same way that you care for her. And right, it's better to have that support. While it sounds bad, take advantage of it. But you should also remember that they (she and her mom) helped you and be grateful for it. However, in the end, you have to be the one that drives to the future that you want.

Neither choices sound appealing. So why not choose neither of the two? Then again, this is coming from the one that keeps on trying to find a way when he's desperate enough.

And I believe you have before already.

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sTuPiD-eLcH In reply to El-Noir-Volk-ng-Yoru [2010-09-16 19:53:50 +0000 UTC]

well... i won't live there for long... i will move as soon as possible in an own flat... theres no way back actually...

sure, but u cant ignore good old germany kicking ur ass...

i definetely take advantage of it and i'm already so grateful that i don't know how to say thanks to them...
i will have to stand on my own some day... sure, they will help me at first, but i dont think, thats something for years... soon or later i have to live my own "new life"...

ur right... i don't wanna rot here, thats for sure... so i have to find a way not to die a slowly suicide then...
i have to separate... like always... shes just a girl... just a very cute, helpful and sometimes crazy girl...

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El-Noir-Volk-ng-Yoru In reply to sTuPiD-eLcH [2010-09-21 10:51:59 +0000 UTC]

No way back?

I don't get the Germany bit, by the way.

It's simple how to say thank you. Just say it. Now, showing it is the harder part, but it's not that difficult.

And that is true, but that's true for a lot of people, even me. 'Course, that's going to take some time, but I can wait. I'm in no hurry to become completely independent.

That's the idea! See? You're not as pessimistic as you used to, and don't you dare try to see otherwise or you'll just go back down that road again. >.>

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sTuPiD-eLcH In reply to El-Noir-Volk-ng-Yoru [2010-09-21 11:39:31 +0000 UTC]

there is no way back... i'm already planning anything and my friend would be really sad and even angry if i just say, i won't move... theres no way back because i have to take that chance...

the thing with germany is, u have to fill out papers for every tiny thing u do and pay for anything... even if ur poor and live on street they still want money from u or papers for getting money from state, but homeless people dont do paperwork and so they dont have these papers...
uh... nvm...

no, i mean, its not enough to say just thank u... they're going to treat me like a family member and will support me in any situation that will come... thats something u cant just say thank u for...

the problem is, i never really was independent... my parents did anything for me... they treated me like a child even as i wasnt anymore... and now i'm even too lazy to learn it by myself... so its the best thing to jump into cold water and try to learn it... then i have to... but its also good to have my friends mother for some questions maybe... i see it as a big chance, maybe bigger than it is...

well, i'm still walking on that road... when i get a job i'm hitchhiking with my friend, but some day i have to get out of her car and walk the rest alone... hopefully in the future someone will walk with me on that road... but with or without i have to walk against nowhere to find a goal...

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El-Noir-Volk-ng-Yoru In reply to sTuPiD-eLcH [2010-09-27 02:33:17 +0000 UTC]

Then take it. Life is a day-by-day choice that we try not to regret.

Yeah. Don't like things like that. They go over my head. >.> I usually have someone help me with stuff like it.

Then like I said, say thank you, and then show it. It'll take time and planning, maybe, but you'll find one. You can even ask someone, a friend of theirs possibly, for advice to do it.

I kind of get that. My parents still do a lot of stuff for me now, but I try to do some things myself. And I'm lazy too, but I do want to learn some things, because some things interest me. And if it's that big of a chance, then take it and run with it.

And you'll find that goal eventually. Maybe not even in the way you think you might, but you will.

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sTuPiD-eLcH In reply to El-Noir-Volk-ng-Yoru [2010-09-27 07:15:31 +0000 UTC]

i do... or i try... 2 of 5 applications are out of the game already... 3 to go...

we'll see... i will pay for the time i live in their house... thats the minimum i can do... and help a bit with the dishes or something...

but the worst is, they care too much... its weird because i care the most about that number one girl, even when she only left the house for getting something... but my parents are annoying... my mother always says something like "that will fall down" when something stands ONE INCH over the edge of the table... she probably never heard of physics... and my dather always takes stuff out of my hands, when i'm trying to do something... (like getting a computer part apart)
it feels like i'm dumb everytime they do it... and thats the way i grow up...

the worst of all, i always try to build a goal by myself...
yesterday i said to her (again), she should stop to give me that hope, because she knows the probability of us getting together...
i try to translate her answer precisely: "if u want it, i tell u, that we'll never be together, but i still think thats something u only can judge in real life, i don't see a point yet why it's not possible (to be together some day), so i can't say 'never'"

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El-Noir-Volk-ng-Yoru In reply to sTuPiD-eLcH [2010-10-12 12:05:28 +0000 UTC]

Gahd, finals week. Just two more days, and it's two week break for me.

How fares the job hunting? Any luck with the last three applications? Made any more?

And that's sort of...I don't know what you call it actually. It makes it seem like you're renting what little space you might have in their house. Manual labor is usually a lot more gratuitous.

It's okay for them to care. I don't know if there's such a thing as caring too much. Okay, so maybe too much of a good thing can be bad, but only if you let their hospitality get to your head.

My parents are annoying, too. Well, I used to think so. Although my dad still does get on my nerves from time to time, they're not so much as annoying as just watching over me in their own way. No one ever said there was a perfect way of parenting. The "you're too young" card got old (irony) a long time ago, though, so my dad always has to find a new way to reason with me if there's something I want to do that he doesn't want me to. Not that that happens much.

And you know what they say. Better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all. You may eventually lose that love, but the feeling of loving is one of the best feelings you can ever have, requited or otherwise (as impossible and stupid as it sounds).

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sTuPiD-eLcH In reply to El-Noir-Volk-ng-Yoru [2010-10-12 12:57:03 +0000 UTC]

finals? u had exams? well... grats... or else... good luck...

i made 5 as wanted... got 3 bad answers and 2 are still open...
have to do the next 5 till 9th of nov...
i will try some temp agencies, because i don't even find 5 "normal" job offers...
hopefully i find a "good one", because there a many black sheeps...

yah... the situation changed a bit, but not much... it was kinda misunderstanding... so actually i'm not going to "live" at her house, but theres a bed for me when i'm there for job interviews and when my flat isnt ready to get in (wallpapers or something)...
short i need to have a flat before i move...

hopefully my parents will realize soon that i will move REALLY... i mean, i dont know when, i now i want it so bad, i have to do it as soon as i can...

yah, my mother says what my father says, so first they havent talked much and my mother was aware about the fact i'm leaving soon... NOW she changed her mind because my father probably said things to her... but its harder with my father... he always says "u should stay here, u have food and a room for free" or "u just don't know what this all will cost" (flat and so on...) its not like i'm not planning this... probably they will realize all, when i'm about to leave...

sure, but love even can be the worst feeling, too... like i said once, i can't really separate love and friendship and my "real" friends are only online...
in the years of being "on" i often felt in love... way too much... its stupid, because my number one is right... u cant fall in love with someone u never met...
so what were these feelings? i told u about my ex... she was my only girlfriend, i met her in chat, we got together in chat, THEN we phoned for the first time, THEN we met in rl and after 4 times meeting in rl, she broke up in chat... we're friends now again, but i know i really loved her, even if it was mostly a chat relationship... it took over a year to get over her...
maybe i'm different in falling in love, but until i know i can't be sure about any feelings... it doesn't even matters if its really love or only wishing it is... it will hurt and probably break my heart again...
so my number one knows how i feel about her, even if i don't say anything about love (like i said, i can't be sure, if i feel love or not)... well, i made 2 1/2 proposals, but she doesn't want to marry... nobody...
but with feelings she always plays for time and doesn't say no... thats making too much hope for a guy like me... sure anything can happen when we know each other in rl, but i don't believe it could be a happy end... the weird thing, i know it won't happen and i know she's not the right one for me (or i'm not for her) but like always brain and heart don't connect well and sometimes have different opinions...

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sTuPiD-eLcH In reply to LinaTheLittelStar [2010-08-16 19:00:04 +0000 UTC]

o_O ich hab nix gefaved <_< *hust*

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LinaTheLittelStar In reply to sTuPiD-eLcH [2010-08-16 19:02:22 +0000 UTC]

sry xDDDD vertan o_o

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sTuPiD-eLcH In reply to LinaTheLittelStar [2010-08-16 19:56:08 +0000 UTC]

ich bin mir noch nich sicher, ob und was ich faven soll... du scheinst da ein paar copyright-delikte begangen zu haben... weiß nich genau, ob ich das gutheißen kann, wenn das stimmt <_<

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sTuPiD-eLcH In reply to kaos-667 [2010-07-22 19:35:38 +0000 UTC]

np

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sTuPiD-eLcH In reply to Armandacyd [2010-06-27 20:46:09 +0000 UTC]

np

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sTuPiD-eLcH In reply to Armandacyd [2010-06-27 20:33:33 +0000 UTC]

merci

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