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4myself — broken
Published: 2005-07-27 02:42:37 +0000 UTC; Views: 167; Favourites: 1; Downloads: 7
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Description shattered house
of broken dreams
made of glass
or so it seems

broken heart
cut by your saw
nightmarish screams
as my eyes are rubbed raw

you twist and rip
as your words sink deeper
with blood my cuts run
as you collecet my tears, grim reeper

to finish off
you leave me here
alone as a misrable reck
not caring about the gashing wounds
that hang around my neck

a broken heart lies in pieces
a black void sucks it in
a numb feeling, a dull aching
a dread of continuous sin

my outside scars will fade
until nothing remains but the memory
but these, my love, will stay forever
never allowing anyone to complete me

unshed tears, still inside
fill the void, with unpenatrable night
these scars i hide eat me up
until death itself would feel like luck
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Comments: 11

fitfulsleep [2005-08-25 15:28:32 +0000 UTC]

It is a very graphic poem but not graphic in that you can see but you can feel. It takes either a disturbed individual or a complete genius to create something like this and whichever you are it is still a pretty damn good poem.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

4myself In reply to fitfulsleep [2005-08-25 20:49:06 +0000 UTC]

lol well thank you very much. unfortunatly i'm definatly not a genius so i guess i must be a disturbed individual. lol glad you liked it

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

fitfulsleep In reply to 4myself [2005-08-26 01:07:35 +0000 UTC]

Well you might just be a genius i think so you see i am fucked up so i write somewhat well. comment on my newest one.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

4myself In reply to fitfulsleep [2005-08-26 22:42:11 +0000 UTC]

lol kk

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

tormented-dreamer [2005-07-27 08:13:22 +0000 UTC]

i reali like this, it has alot of emotion to it n feelin ...tis very wel worded n put together too
luv andrea xxx

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

4myself In reply to tormented-dreamer [2005-07-28 03:08:03 +0000 UTC]

thank you

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Indo-Solution [2005-07-27 03:26:45 +0000 UTC]

ummmm.. well i know what you had on your mind. But, lil miss anna. your not alone. never ever.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

4myself In reply to Indo-Solution [2005-07-28 03:08:39 +0000 UTC]

... thanx chris.. hey, look on the brightside.. i got a poem outta the mess

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

atheist-ashtray [2005-07-27 02:56:44 +0000 UTC]

i really like this. The last quatrain is the best. And the line "Until death itself would feel like luck" is such a powerful statement. You can feel pain in this writing, a sense of broken emptiness and desperation. A lot of people would simply say it's "angsty teen poetry" or "emo crap" but i relate to it and understand it. i'm definetly (spelling?) ing this.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

4myself In reply to atheist-ashtray [2005-07-28 03:09:56 +0000 UTC]

thank you... yea, if ppl think its any of those other things.. "angsty teen poetry" or "emo crap"... they should try feeling it themselves...

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

atheist-ashtray In reply to 4myself [2005-08-22 15:33:44 +0000 UTC]

You're welcome And i'll remember to tell people who think my poetry is emo and crappy that they should try feeling it.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0