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Published: 2008-05-06 03:18:34 +0000 UTC; Views: 223; Favourites: 1; Downloads: 1
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Description
The bushes sat alone right thereAs the flowers began to wither
The sun set and darkness ruled
And thus they began to shiver
Alone they sat, down by that tree
As the stream did gently flow
The cold breeze did brush the field
As the branches swayed to and fro
The petals drooped as night set in
And the moon did begin to shine
The radiant colours of the plants
Dimmed in the passing of time
The stream and trees lived in night
As a creature’s head did peer
Its bright white coat, and soft grey tail
Did compliment its fluffy ears
The rabbit’s nose did twitch
If e’er a sound it did hear
Innocence covered its face
Its grin from ear to ear
Tall they were, but soon they bowed
As the rabbit’s feet would bounce
A lone tulip cowered away
As the rabbit’s body did pounce
Time went by, and the sun did rise
As the moon went back to slumber
The palest blue glistened in grass
As the rest were left to wonder
The roses wept and the tree did cry
As the stream did cease to run
The mystery of the tulip did alter
The feelings of everyone
Time stood still, the sun remained
Its face smiled down below
Its cheerful cry and joyous smile
Shone down in its orange glow
But the sun had to leave, thus it was so
That the plants and trees would weep
The stream kept moving, and time did to
As the bliss began to seep…
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Comments: 8
GoldeenHerself [2008-05-06 22:08:50 +0000 UTC]
That's a really pretty poem, and it has really great environment and feeling; though I'm a little confused as to what happened in it. Did the bunny eat the plants? Are we supposed to be sad?
Other than that, nice rhyming and timing. I'd write more but my arms are very tired right now.
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a-proper-name In reply to GoldeenHerself [2008-05-06 22:17:01 +0000 UTC]
lol
essentially, the bunny just pounces through the field and tramples on the tulip
i don't like the part where i have
"The mystery of the tulip did alter
The feelings of everyone"
it's just not as nice as the rest in my opinion
thank you for cmting it AND for faving it, much thanks
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GoldeenHerself In reply to a-proper-name [2008-05-06 23:08:39 +0000 UTC]
You're welcome, it's a nice poem!
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a-proper-name In reply to GoldeenHerself [2008-05-08 03:00:54 +0000 UTC]
Again thank you for the compliment
May I ask a question? Can I get you to reveal your true identity lol
Cos I keep going to call you Mr. Anderson or something of the like lol
New 2Sense tonight, woo!
BTW I was too lazy to comment on the d00m toilets artwork that you did, but it was good. thank you yet again
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GoldeenHerself In reply to a-proper-name [2008-05-08 03:22:38 +0000 UTC]
No problem!
Hmm, generally I don't give out my "secret identity" on the internet, but you can call me Rondie or Elrond for short.
Yuppers, the show is a good one! Also, I'll be posting the cover in just a bit…
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a-proper-name In reply to GoldeenHerself [2008-05-08 08:21:48 +0000 UTC]
okay
rondie sounds kewl
i like words that end in the "ee" sound
so woo
im rather amused that the only people that e'er seem to comment my poems is you lol
and you
great
i'm popular lmao
oh well, they don't know what they are missing no?
lol
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GoldeenHerself In reply to a-proper-name [2008-05-08 15:47:26 +0000 UTC]
They'll come around eventually.
It was the same for me when I first started.
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a-proper-name In reply to GoldeenHerself [2008-05-09 08:03:34 +0000 UTC]
nawww
but you're brilliant
still
thanks for the faith
=]]
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