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Published: 2008-07-08 05:43:06 +0000 UTC; Views: 34921; Favourites: 328; Downloads: 253
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Description
Once upon a time, there live an abnormally large penis who....ate a bowling ball. He then became thirsty for..
..a bucket of cheese coated walrus juice. But that wasn't enough..
.., for, you see, this penis was half werewolf and..
..lived a secret double-life as Harry Potter. The penis was..
..in love with Paris Hilton, in spite of her affection for many other penises, but..
..the abnormal large penis knew that Paris could see him for the..
..ungodly oversized ballsack he possessed; however, she still..
..refused to have passionate orange sex with the penis. This drove the penis..
..to homosexuality, from which vantage point he started hanging out at..
..Starbucks. Where all the happy perverted tiny..
..child penises were left unattended by their caffeine-high parents, so he..
..latched onto one of them, but to his surprise..
..the little penises had vaginas, which caused him to..
..reverse-fap quite rapidly. This gave the penis terrible carpet burn and so..
..he resolved to eat one of the baby penises, resulting in..
..massive heart-burn that spread to all the other penises in the vicinity, which caused..
..them to all simultaneously vomit their white fluids onto eachother. Then the policeboobs arrived and..
..began dancing to the macaroni. "Wingardium Leveosa!" yelled the harry potter penis..
..before he promptly pierced the boob's nipple with his wand and..
..caused it to fly off and land on the policeboobs. Where it then turned into an abnormally purple..
..orange. Yes, an abnormally purple orange. This orange was regular size, but it vibrated and..
..began to engulf the flock of penises is it's purple-orangeness. The penises orgasmed frantically..
..transforming the purple orange into a white one--a sticky white one--but they were not done yet, for..
..along came a much larger white--sticky white--orange. It then appeared to..
..buttrape the first orange, making it white on the inside until it was no longer an orange at all, but rather..
..a manbearpig. And one handsome manbearpig at that, the penises frolicked around the manbearpig and..
..begged for the privilege of sucking his bearpig cock and maybe fondling his manballs. This angered the manbearpig, however, and..
..caused the manbearpig to erupt horrible white lava. It spilled all over Starbucks until..
..the manager inevitably took it and started selling it as a new type of iced drink. It sold millions and swept the nation..
..they even won a nobel peace prize! But all was not well in Kansas..
..BUT WHO GIVES A FUCK? "Screw Kansas," said the penis, while he..
..did just that, and attempted to rape the small farm town. But alas it was far too large for..
..him to feel anything, his cock only being the size of a large mansion. Annoyed, he decided to..
..thrust his invisible pelvis in the faces of all the leaders of the world. Including the very seductive..
..Barbara Bush, also known as George Washington, but soon his eyes melted and his cock deflated. Defeated, he..
..decided to move to Mexico, where nobody judged anybody of the size of their genitals. This is where the penis..
..met the love of his life: a disgusting and unkempt pussy. They..
..started a family together; full of many abnormally orange vagina.
The end...? ಠ_ಠ
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Comments: 861
Isis-Purrfect In reply to ??? [2008-07-11 02:24:37 +0000 UTC]
.......I would marry both of you D: At the same time.
And then make sweet sweet love to you both. And the purple orange.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Zarblonski In reply to ??? [2008-07-10 22:39:04 +0000 UTC]
Mommy, I want to be a penis when I grow up!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
wolvenstriker In reply to ??? [2008-07-10 21:38:12 +0000 UTC]
lol that is interesting XD
I never knew that penises went through that much :>
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Nightmare-Hotel In reply to Abfc [2008-07-10 22:08:23 +0000 UTC]
I believe you. You'd know.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
starfishbubbles In reply to ??? [2008-07-10 20:03:51 +0000 UTC]
Omg. This is amazing. XD You are now watched.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Kelliestar In reply to ??? [2008-07-10 20:00:52 +0000 UTC]
W...T...F...
Wow, I really shouldn't have said that.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Abfc In reply to Kelliestar [2008-07-10 20:01:08 +0000 UTC]
So I take it you liked the story? C:
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Kelliestar In reply to Abfc [2008-07-10 20:04:37 +0000 UTC]
I F***ING LOVED IT!!!!!!!
...Again, I shouldn't have said that.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Anna-Jaganshi In reply to ??? [2008-07-10 18:57:53 +0000 UTC]
But this was just hilarious.
And so this is the life of a penis. =O
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Nightmare-Hotel In reply to ??? [2008-07-10 15:03:59 +0000 UTC]
Goodness. I really loved reading this. I think it's amazingly hysterical. I loved it.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
LoserHobo In reply to ??? [2008-07-10 14:15:12 +0000 UTC]
Wow lol, this was frightening, but entertaining
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
DarkDragonRising In reply to ??? [2008-07-10 06:45:42 +0000 UTC]
this is insanly disturbing yet so fucking hilarious.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
evilsyndicatemember In reply to ??? [2008-07-10 04:59:13 +0000 UTC]
And this is supposed to be Children's Fiction Prose?!
This was awesome. :')
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
linknomisuess In reply to ??? [2008-07-10 04:48:12 +0000 UTC]
wow that made my day (or whats left of it)
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
PB-Schiller In reply to ??? [2008-07-09 22:17:18 +0000 UTC]
You should hire Elman Brown to make a graphic novel adaptation of this.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
PB-Schiller In reply to Abfc [2008-07-09 22:33:48 +0000 UTC]
We can't be in the same room together, we were cursed by a witch.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
divihyperactivity In reply to ??? [2008-07-09 17:57:42 +0000 UTC]
WHAT A LOVELY STORY.
Seriously. This thing made me lol so freakin hard. Great now my parents are staring
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
PsychoGlitch In reply to ??? [2008-07-09 15:30:09 +0000 UTC]
It's one of those things where you wanna stop reading and look away, but you can't. LOL.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
SophiaDragonMaster In reply to ??? [2008-07-09 14:10:06 +0000 UTC]
This was such a beautiful story!n a bit confusing after a point but still very beautiful!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
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