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AK-Is-Harmless β Papercut
#blood #cartoon #comedy #comic #cut #funny #humor #humour #injury #paper #papercut #winslow #benandwinslow
Published: 2018-06-12 15:32:27 +0000 UTC; Views: 910; Favourites: 35; Downloads: 1
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Papercuts are the worst. I gave myself a really nasty one when I was cleaning up my old house as I prepared to move into my new one. I did exactly what Winslow does here: I reached into a box filled with papers without really paying attention and gave myself one helluva papercut. And it was the worst kind of papercut, too, the kind you get from a really thick piece of paper. Ugh!
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Reblog on Tumblr here: ak-is-harmless.tumblr.com/postβ¦
This first appeared on Defenestration www.defenestrationmag.net on Friday, June 8th.
Become a fan of Ben & Winslow on Facebook: www.facebook.com/pages/Ben-Winβ¦
---AK
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Comments: 27
Slightly dramatic for a dude that regularly willingly replaces his head
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This is true.
---AK
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I'm going to nonchalantly stick my hand in a cookie jar that's clearly out in the open and unguarded. What could POSSIBLY go wrong?!
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Only EVERYTHING.
---AK
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Suddenly...alligators.
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Happens all the time.
---AK
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Winslow is the type of guy who replaces his head with stuff regularly, but a papercut leads him to be a screaming mess.
Now I choose to believe that you are IRL Winslow. Take that as you will.
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Thankfully, Winslow and I are very different people.
---AK
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Do it quick!
---AK
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When I had a job processing mail, (mechanically opened, manually removed from envelope), I went through so many band-aids.Β Not for actual paper cuts, but as a preventative.Β Reaching into hundreds of slightly opened envelopes an hour can murder your cuticles.Β So many little nicks and hangnails.Β
Then if you got a paper cut somewhere else on your hand, (or worse, the dreaded cardboard cut), you had to disinfect it painfully because gods only know where the mail had been and what was on it.Β Though on occasion the postal service knew too.Β We'd occasionally get mail in "sorry it got damaged" bags that had been burned in a fiery crash, or had gum on it; or, one time with a nice note saying that, "the public mail box had been egged, please do not be concerned."
Let me tell you, I was concerned.Β The gum was wintergreen and still sticky, stinky, and nauseating.Β And that burned letter was 18 months late.
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Don't they make you wear plastic gloves when handling mail? 
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Not when processing credit card payments.Β The option might have been there, but I don't remember it.Β Lots of that horrid pinkish wax stuff to make your fingers grip better, though.Β Things could have changed since the late 0's.
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Ah 
Well, learned something new 
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That's horrifying.
---AK
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It's too much. Just too, too much.
---AK
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Paper cuts are the worst.Β And the smaller, less noticeable and less bloody they are the more they hurt so you just sound like a big whiny wuss when you try and get sympathy for your intense pain.
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Everything I touch is pain!
---AK
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Soooo much the worst.
---AK
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Yeeeah, I remember when the charlies used to hid holes filled with ANSI A sheets in the jungle, back then in Vietnam...Β Β
I still wake up sweating, dreaming of my bros, shattered to pieces by those darn papercuts...
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The main issue of papercuts is the bleed for 30 min straight, no matter what you do.
But in this case I suggest to take the Black knight philosophy:Β "'Tis but a scratch".
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It's a good philosophy.
---AK
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