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alapip β€” shhh...
Published: 2014-07-07 16:05:34 +0000 UTC; Views: 266; Favourites: 11; Downloads: 0
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Description Β  Β [a haiku]

secret from ourselves
silent sounds of velvet bells
tolled only in poems

llp - dA - jul2014
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Comments: 10

LancelotPrice [2014-07-09 20:47:38 +0000 UTC]

The revised version is far superior.

πŸ‘: 0 ⏩: 1

alapip In reply to LancelotPrice [2014-07-09 23:24:12 +0000 UTC]

i don't know how "far", but i agree
that the haiku is better for posting
as it is. Β the other version could be
edited though... Β 
so -

πŸ‘: 0 ⏩: 0

SRSmith [2014-07-08 03:59:41 +0000 UTC]

It's a great and deep comment, and artfully crafted into an equally great haiku.

Very nicely done!

πŸ‘: 0 ⏩: 1

alapip In reply to SRSmith [2014-07-08 12:08:51 +0000 UTC]

well thank you, Steve!
for the fav too!

πŸ‘: 0 ⏩: 0

Bark [2014-07-07 21:28:59 +0000 UTC]

I agree with the first comment... they're both very good, each in it's own way.

πŸ‘: 0 ⏩: 1

alapip In reply to Bark [2014-07-07 21:35:50 +0000 UTC]

thanks, Ron, for the fav too!

πŸ‘: 0 ⏩: 0

rlkirkland [2014-07-07 21:13:07 +0000 UTC]

...warm words and a dashing new avatar!

πŸ‘: 0 ⏩: 1

alapip In reply to rlkirkland [2014-07-07 21:28:31 +0000 UTC]

thanks, Ron!

πŸ‘: 0 ⏩: 0

SedahLiah [2014-07-07 16:38:54 +0000 UTC]

I'm not sure which version I like better, the comment version sounds so natural and grounded but the haiku has such lovely alliteration. I also like how your comments on other works can find themselves turning into your own pieces, it's a creativity and spontaneity I admire and envy.

πŸ‘: 0 ⏩: 1

alapip In reply to SedahLiah [2014-07-07 16:51:41 +0000 UTC]

thank you for the fav, Rick, and
yes, the original comment seemed
as good in its own way, compared
with the haiku it had morphed into.
so, i kinda posted both.

i'd say at least half of my ideas come
directly from other people's works.
each comment can take a moment
or an hour and more, as i see it
becoming something i hopeΒ is worth
saying. Β 

πŸ‘: 0 ⏩: 0