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Angiehimesan — Perfectly Normal. (Sebastian Michaelis x Reader)
Published: 2014-08-22 22:37:38 +0000 UTC; Views: 41554; Favourites: 455; Downloads: 0
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"It was a relatively peaceful afternoon. Nothing had been destroyed in the Phantomhive Manor, courtesy of Finny, Bard and Mey-Rin...yet. Not that the Phantomhive Earl would hear about it since the Phantomhive Butler would attend to it and see it set right immediately. Mey-Rin was doing the laundry, Bard was tending to the repairs in the house(caused by him earlier that day), Finny was trimming the hedges while Mr. Tanaka was busy writing in his journal...eh? Oh wait, never mind. He's just sipping on his tea. I must have been confused by that steam surrounding his shrinking form. Anyway, all was calm in the Queen's Guard Dog's home. All because of the Phantomhive butler. Ah, and speak of the devil, there he was down the corridor. The magnificently efficient, wonderfully charming, sinfully good looking-"
"Hmm? (Name)-san? Not that I dispute, but who are you talking to?"

Your eyes rose up the tall, slender length to the closed-eye smile of the butler in question.
"Ah! Sebastian! What are you doing here? You're interrupting my narration!" You gasped and took a step back from the man who seemed to have taken what should have been a 15 second walk, in milliseconds.
"Oh~? Narration? To whom?" He opened his unearthly eyes and peered down at you. As always, you were momentarily spellbound by them. Noticing this, his smile morphed into a smirk. It made you shiver, effectively releasing you from your self-imposed enchantment.

You turned away and started out towards the door, heading to the garden.
"No one really, Sebas-chan." He frowned at the nickname, or rather at who the nickname reminded him of.
As soon as you opened the door and took a step out, you were swiftly pulled back in and pressed against a firm lean body. The door was banged shut an inch from your nose.

Mentally preparing to get into a screaming match with the taller male (with you doing the actual screaming) about randomly grabbing you, you were caught of guard by his low, scarily calm voice right above your head.

"(Name)-san, I believe the Young Master would appreciate your company at this moment."
Red flags went off in your head. Since when did Ciel ever 'appreciate your company'?
"He seemed very eager to play a round of chess with you."
Sirens accompanied the red flags. Ciel was never 'eager' to do anything with you.
"I'll be sure to bring up some chocolate treats in a moment for the two of you. So just. Stay. There until I come with them."

You turned in his grasp and tilted your head back to look him in his eyes, which startled him.
"Sebastian."
"Yes?"
"Are you trying to soften me up so you can eat my soul?"
"...Huh?" He held you a bit away from him so that he could look at you properly.
"I know what you are."
"..."
"You're a vampire aren't you, Mr. Perfect?"

His serious face transformed into his beautiful laughing face.
"Oh, (Name)-san. If I wanted to eat your soul, I would not 'soften you up'." His eyes seemed to flash pink for an instant. "And No, I am not a vampire." He released you completely and pushed you towards Ciel's study.
Just as you were entering - "Unless you want me to be~" - you unceremoniously stumbled into the room, causing Ciel to mushroom sigh; he was certain that Sebastian was using you in some way to kill him slowly.

Looking back at the then closed door, you whined as you picked yourself up. "You people need to treat me better."
"You're still alive despite your uselessness, aren't you?"
"Cold, very cold."
"I don't try at all"

                                                                ~Meanwhile with Sebastian~

Having left you in the young master's study, he walked out of the manor towards the garden where he had spotted a group of uninvited guests. Honestly, this was the third assassination attempt this month. Didn't they learn?
Sighing, he readjusted his gloves and walked calmly into the unsuspecting group.

                                                                ~In The Phantomhive Study~

"Argh!"
Your ears perked up at the sound while Ciel didn't even budge.
"Someone save us!"
You glanced at the boy still setting up the chess board. After a moment, he looked at you.
"If you want to go, just go. No one's keeping you here." He grumbled.
A lazy grin spread across your face and you got out of the seat you had been occupying.
Offering him a mock curtsy, you half-ran out of the room. Really, there wasn't ever a dull moment in the Phantomhive household, was there?

When you reached the large glass windows that overlooked the garden, you stopped. A shadow that seemed to grow larger and larger by the second, was cast over you. The glass shattered and you were once again pulled into a larger frame that was quickly becoming comfortably familiar. A twitching man lay where you had been but a few seconds ago and a sigh above your head passed warm air through your hair.

"Honestly, you don't do well with instructions, do you?" He asked you as he threw the man out of the broken window and then proceeded to jump out of the second story window, still holding you. Landing with his knees slightly bent, he suddenly raised one leg and turned on the other, kicking a man who had run up behind him.
He glanced at you, indicating that he was awaiting a reply to your disobedience.
"Really? You want an answer now?"
"I don't see why not." He replied while dodging bullets from three different shooters.
"...I...wanted to see what all the noise was."
You closed your eyes and pressed yourself closer to him as he dropped and somersaulted on the ground before sweeping out his right leg and tripping one of the shooters, who fell and you assumed broke his nose, if the spray of blood was anything to go by.
"Satisfied?"
He closed the distance between him and the other two shooters and kicked the first shooter's gun out of his hand and clean onto the second shooter's temple, the latter dropping down unconscious.
"More or less."
The then gun-less gunman proceeded to brandish a knife and instead of aiming for Sebastian, the difficult target, he aimed it at you. Charging towards the two of you, he brought his hand back as though to stab. However, when he was within arm's reach, he suddenly stopped and threw it forward, aiming for the spot between your eyes.

White gloved fingers caught the projectile as it lightly grazed your skin. It was then flicked back to its owner with the hilt hitting him right where he had been aiming on you.
"Sebstian!" You gasped out, amazed. An amused hum replied.

Releasing you, Sebastian performed a roundhouse kick to the man who flew back into the trees surrounding the manor. His cloak flew up into the air with his fluid movement, his long leg, cloaked in black material, extended straight where the man's face had been, his half-coat and shirt slightly raised from his waist...
"A Phantomhive butler who can not do this much-"

"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! SEBASTIAN THAT'S SO CUTE!"
You fell to the floor clutching at your stomach. The male turned to you, bemused at your interruption.
Due to his patient nature, and the fact that there were no other men hired to kill the Phantomhive Earl on the estate, he waited for you to finish your rather...interesting laugh.

"I really do think that's awfully cute Sebastian."
"Hmm?"
"Did you make them yourself?"
"I'm sorry? I don't understand."
"Your...undergarments..." You tried not to burst out again.
"..."
"They have little Ciel faces on them."
"..."
"I think it's cute."

                                                           ~In The Phantomhive Study~

"DON'T HURT ME SEBASTIAN! I'LL NEVER LAUGH AGAIN, I SWEAR!"

The blue-eyed boy continued with his solo game of chess. Whatever you had done, he was not getting involved. He reached out and lifted the Queen piece.

"I HAVE PANTIES WITH YOU ON THEM SO IT'S REALLY NOT THAT WEIRD THAT YOU HAVE CIEL ON YOURS!"
The piece snapped in half and fell to the floor.
He cursed with all his heart whatever brought you to him.

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Comments: 157

Ladyofthemadhouse [2015-07-02 02:43:17 +0000 UTC]

ROTFL I LAUGHED SO HARD!!!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Angiehimesan In reply to Ladyofthemadhouse [2015-07-02 16:41:23 +0000 UTC]

 : What kind of butler would I be if I couldn't make the fair lady happy?
Me: One with normal underwear   
 : I beg your pardon?
Me: owo Meep.

I'm glad you liked it!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Ladyofthemadhouse In reply to Angiehimesan [2015-07-02 23:48:02 +0000 UTC]

OWO SEBAS CHAN!!!!! *tackle hug*

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

PinkHeather26 [2015-06-22 20:30:03 +0000 UTC]

 "AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! SEBASTIAN THAT'S SO CUTE!"
      You fell to the floor clutching at your stomach. The male turned to you, bemused at your interruption.
      Due to his patient nature, and the fact that there were no other men hired to kill the Phantomhive Earl on the estate, he waited for you to finish your rather...interesting laugh.
      
      "I really do think that's awfully cute Sebastian."
      "Hmm?"
      "Did you make them yourself?"
      "I'm sorry? I don't understand."
      "Your...undergarments..." You tried not to burst out again.
      "..."
      "They have little Ciel faces on them."
      "..."
      "I think it's cute."



XD XD XD

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Angiehimesan In reply to PinkHeather26 [2015-06-23 16:12:09 +0000 UTC]

Sebby is adorable isn't he?
   
Sebastian: I beg your pardon?     
Nvm ;^;
Anyway, I'm glad you liked it!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

PinkHeather26 In reply to Angiehimesan [2015-06-23 18:44:22 +0000 UTC]

verry much! and sebby, i realy do find it cute!!!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

hetaliaizmal1fe In reply to ??? [2015-06-14 14:38:39 +0000 UTC]

Beautiful

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Angiehimesan In reply to hetaliaizmal1fe [2015-06-14 16:30:47 +0000 UTC]

Thank you!
   

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Kadina In reply to ??? [2015-05-05 09:40:58 +0000 UTC]

There is absolutely nothing wrong with concentrating on men's undergarments.. as long as they aren't briefs lol

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Angiehimesan In reply to Kadina [2015-05-06 09:23:50 +0000 UTC]

Teehee!
I see you~

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

QueenPapal In reply to ??? [2015-03-24 20:11:40 +0000 UTC]

*raises hand* I would just like to point out...MEYRIN GAVE ME HER UNDERWEAR TO BORROW, THESE ARE NOT MINE!!! I AM INNOCEEEENNNNTTT!!!!!!!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Angiehimesan In reply to QueenPapal [2015-03-25 01:40:53 +0000 UTC]

Ahahaha!
 
I hadn't thought of that!
But don't get poor MeyRin in trouble~
 

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

QueenPapal In reply to Angiehimesan [2015-03-26 14:49:15 +0000 UTC]

:3 I will just blame Grell somehow. Sebas-chan wont even find it weird then:

"Grell made them and gave them to me as a Christmas present!! Go after him instead!!" 

*hides behind Ciel and Author-chan*

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Angiehimesan In reply to QueenPapal [2015-03-26 16:54:31 +0000 UTC]

*panicks*
I...I...
 
*hides behind Ciel*
 

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

QueenPapal In reply to Angiehimesan [2015-03-28 11:50:03 +0000 UTC]

*both of us cower behind Ciel*

Ciel: *sigh* I am surrounded by idiots.

Me: hey!!

*Sebastian approaches*

Me: N-nevermind!! *hides*

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Angiehimesan In reply to QueenPapal [2015-03-28 17:10:32 +0000 UTC]

Ahahaha!
We should write a story about our escapades traumatizing Sebby.
 
Sebastian:      Did you say something?
Me: ...Nope.   

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

QueenPapal In reply to Angiehimesan [2015-03-29 09:10:23 +0000 UTC]

Me: *throws item out a window* Sebastian, that random little kitten is falling to its doom!! Go! Save it!

Sebastian: *disappears out the window*

Me: *whispers* We totally should!! 

...do you think Ciel would help us out?  

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Angiehimesan In reply to QueenPapal [2015-05-29 22:45:31 +0000 UTC]

Me: ...   You will, won't you Ciel-kun?
Ciel:    Of course!
Us: Yay!
Ciel: Not.    Sebastian. I order you to deal with these two.
Sebastian:   Yes, my Lord.
Us: Oh no.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

QueenPapal In reply to Angiehimesan [2015-06-05 19:03:48 +0000 UTC]

Me: run run run runrunrunrun!!!!!!

Us: *run faster that wind*

Me: You'll never take us alive!!!! *throws Grell at Sebastian* Take that!!!! 

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

ThePhantomDabber In reply to ??? [2015-03-04 22:08:39 +0000 UTC]

Dying! loved the ending!

 

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Angiehimesan In reply to ThePhantomDabber [2015-03-05 00:58:04 +0000 UTC]

Teehee!
I'm glad you did!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

DemonCircusCat In reply to ??? [2015-02-28 16:13:27 +0000 UTC]

I've read this at least 10 times and hasn't gotten old yet. So funny

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Angiehimesan In reply to DemonCircusCat [2015-03-02 18:09:52 +0000 UTC]

Thank you!
 
That means loads to me! I'm glad you liked it.
   

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

AuraLady [2015-02-26 07:04:00 +0000 UTC]

**dies laughing** omg Ciel face... wait did I say I had Seb's face on my panties???

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Angiehimesan In reply to AuraLady [2015-02-28 05:34:09 +0000 UTC]

Yes you did!

And effectively traumatized Ciel! *highfive*

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

AuraLady In reply to Angiehimesan [2015-02-28 05:37:27 +0000 UTC]

**highfives back** though why wouldn't he be traumatized by Sebastian having underwear with Ciel's face on them.... lol but hey take what you can get right? lol **runs faster when Sebastian tries to tackle her**

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

sesshomare In reply to ??? [2015-02-19 03:38:56 +0000 UTC]

ahahahahahahahah oh this was grate fun

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Angiehimesan In reply to sesshomare [2015-02-28 05:36:10 +0000 UTC]

Why thank you!

I'm glad you liked it!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

doodlesinink In reply to ??? [2015-02-10 16:06:18 +0000 UTC]

Awesome story! The question now is, whose face is on Ciel's underwear?

👍: 0 ⏩: 2

FANGIRLHetalia In reply to doodlesinink [2015-02-18 08:41:09 +0000 UTC]

XDDD
I think he has Lizzie on his...
XDDDDDD

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Angiehimesan In reply to doodlesinink [2015-02-13 15:31:48 +0000 UTC]

Thanks!
I'm glad you liked it!


Oh dear, we hadn't thought of that!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

FANGIRLHetalia In reply to ??? [2015-02-05 07:10:15 +0000 UTC]

XDDDDDD
I cannot stop laughing at the ending!!!!!
That was hilarious!!!~
Awesome story!!!~

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Angiehimesan In reply to FANGIRLHetalia [2015-02-13 15:45:34 +0000 UTC]

Teehee!
Thank you loads!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

FANGIRLHetalia In reply to Angiehimesan [2015-02-18 08:34:34 +0000 UTC]

Anytime!!!~

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Mochaeii In reply to ??? [2014-12-14 17:52:27 +0000 UTC]

XD wow

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Angiehimesan In reply to Mochaeii [2014-12-27 13:24:42 +0000 UTC]

Hey!
Sorry the reply is super late.
:3
Thanks!
I'm glad you liked it!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Mochaeii In reply to Angiehimesan [2014-12-27 14:45:17 +0000 UTC]

Np

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

smol-glaze [2014-12-14 01:28:17 +0000 UTC]

Sebastian: I am a perfectly normal human earth butler.
I immediatly thought of Invader Zim because of the title XD!!!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Angiehimesan In reply to smol-glaze [2014-12-27 13:32:06 +0000 UTC]

Ahahaha!
True true!

I'm glad you liked it~
:3

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Vamp104 [2014-11-20 01:48:30 +0000 UTC]

Ciel panties! That's the funniest thing I've ever heard!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Angiehimesan In reply to Vamp104 [2014-12-07 04:19:42 +0000 UTC]

I know right?
It would be super hilarious if it was animated!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Vamp104 In reply to Angiehimesan [2014-12-07 04:20:36 +0000 UTC]

Oh yes! Ceil would be like "wtf sebastian!"

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

NayaWhovian1016 In reply to ??? [2014-11-09 19:44:16 +0000 UTC]

ERMAHGERD!!!!! FUNNIEST THING I'VE READ ALL YEAR!!! Honestly, you are brilliant!!!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Angiehimesan In reply to NayaWhovian1016 [2014-11-15 06:02:45 +0000 UTC]

Thank you! I'm glad you think so!

   

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

OtakuFangirl1200 In reply to ??? [2014-11-08 08:15:49 +0000 UTC]

XD THE PANTIES TELL THE TRUE STORY!! XD
That's just too funny X3 LUV this story!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Angiehimesan In reply to OtakuFangirl1200 [2014-11-15 06:04:54 +0000 UTC]

Ahaha! Exactly!

I'm glad you do!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

OtakuFangirl1200 In reply to Angiehimesan [2014-11-15 14:37:57 +0000 UTC]

The panty thing was just too funny! When I showed my friends this one they were laughing so hard X3

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Naru-17 [2014-11-08 00:33:44 +0000 UTC]

                             

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Angiehimesan In reply to Naru-17 [2014-11-15 06:05:29 +0000 UTC]

                   
Sankyuu!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Naru-17 In reply to Angiehimesan [2014-12-05 18:12:15 +0000 UTC]

your welcome it just too good.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0


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