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ash-interrupted — You Win
Published: 2004-05-30 18:21:24 +0000 UTC; Views: 719; Favourites: 7; Downloads: 20
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Description
They said that that I would make itthought that I was strong
and believe me that I never
wanted to prove them wrong
but there's only so long I can hold on
and I've been slipping far too long
I can't hold on to their world forever
it just wasn't meant to be
I live in a darker place now
their world's too good for me
regrets, scars, illussions and tears
guilt, voices, hate and fears
this is a place you don't want to be
this is the world that's meant for me
I am weak and don't belong
they won't end up here they are strong
I can't keep fighting
I'll never be free
I can't escape the sickness
if the sickness is me
it's breaking me and I'm so tired
it's time to let go and give in
my life is over, my time's expired
congratulations world, you win
-Ashley Carver
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Comments: 14
aww that's no good
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
i actaully really like this..u should too its really well written and shit...great job!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
I agree with the speachless comment, it's really good, only problem is one tiny spelling mistake, "congradulations" = congratulations, that's it! It's amazing, I can't imagine why you don't like it
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
ah thanks hun
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
well thank you very much I appreciate it
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Well I think it's a good poem, and if there's anything that would take away from it, it's the few typos here and there and instead of saying "you win", maybe you could say "you've won." But far be it from me to speak of such changes, I know most people don't like it. Hell, I don't like it. 
👍: 0 ⏩: 0