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Published: 2010-02-27 07:45:38 +0000 UTC; Views: 2187; Favourites: 39; Downloads: 38
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Description
Up Abovei.
Up above,
birds in the tree, in the rain,
in the night
ii.
Clouds moving
across a field
of moving clouds
iii.
Below the horizon,
the ocean moon
waves
iv.
With each gust,
the chatter of leaves:
passing time
v.
What about a cold night
makes these lines
so hard to finish?
vi.
Fitful leaves
moving
a March day
vii.
Tomcat sneaks
a glance at me –
sparrows take flight
viii.
3:00 a.m. –
my pen falls
awake
ix.
Between fence posts
the spider's web –
still
x.
Watching puddles
of sparrows bathing
in evening sun
xi.
Encouraged by rain,
magnolia blossoms
broken by rain
xii.
With each branch
the sapling birch grows
taller than me
xiii.
A glooming sky
gathers against hills
close as yesterday
xiv.
Patchy sky above –
these broken lilies
mending
xv.
White light
in a gray sky –
Winter sun
xvi.
At sunset –
the jetty
dips into the sea
xvii.
After the storm –
fields of puddles;
everywhere there is sun
xviii.
Cold to the touch –
these windows
full of sun
xix.
The clatter of hail
leaving the sky:
lonely
xx.
Between blades of grass,
March storms
gathering
xxi.
Sunny day –
a bowl of ramen
to cloud my glasses
xxii.
Swirling leaves –
my eyes chase
the running breeze
xxiii.
Crow on the back fence
watching –
but not me
xxiv.
A cloudless day,
and the gnats are storming in
a bar of sunlight
xxv.
Two crows crossing
miles of sky –
together
xxvi.
Crabgrass
among the daffodils –
of all things...
xxvii.
Perched on a fencepost,
a crow turns
into the wind
xxviii.
Stalking houseflies
as Mick Jagger sings:
it's only rock 'n' roll
xxix.
Conspiring among the bones
of almond trees –
crows
xxx.
Seething beside the road,
another devil
in the dust
-or-
Watching this devil seethe –
the mind swirls
with dust
-or-
Watching the column,
I sit – dust catching
with the devil
xxxi.
A fifth night
away from home –
tick tock tick tock tick
x-tra.
All across the valley,
so blue a sea –
wild lupine blooms
On the hillside
cows make a meal of their meal,
despite the rain
Related content
Comments: 108
Not-a-Great-Artist In reply to ??? [2010-03-10 16:27:28 +0000 UTC]
Lovely! I especially enjoyed line v. Amazing work as always.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
b1gfan In reply to Not-a-Great-Artist [2010-03-11 05:46:42 +0000 UTC]
Thank you Elizabeth I appreciate your taking the time to read and enjoy the haiku in this set.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Not-a-Great-Artist In reply to b1gfan [2010-03-11 15:27:29 +0000 UTC]
Of course! I always enjoy reading your poems.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
b1gfan In reply to seekingmysoul [2010-03-11 05:47:59 +0000 UTC]
Heheheh Oh no - you are amazing
Writers are a dime a dozen; it's readers that are truly wonderful.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
seekingmysoul In reply to b1gfan [2010-03-11 07:03:14 +0000 UTC]
Readers are wonderful but, it takes a writer that conveys visuals that draw one into their minds and creates another world! lol
Very welcome
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
somnomollior In reply to ??? [2010-03-09 13:08:45 +0000 UTC]
I love the puddles of sparrows!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
b1gfan In reply to somnomollior [2010-03-10 02:49:13 +0000 UTC]
They are the very best puddles
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
greymists [2010-03-09 03:44:25 +0000 UTC]
The last one is my favorite thus far. I'm a sucker for sparrows.
<3!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
b1gfan In reply to greymists [2010-03-09 05:15:06 +0000 UTC]
They are the quintessential bird Thanks for taking the time to read my friend
I appreciate ya'
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
seekingmysoul [2010-03-07 21:23:07 +0000 UTC]
Magnificent piece, beautifully worded with so much immagery...love it!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Tworoads In reply to ??? [2010-03-07 20:14:40 +0000 UTC]
I really like vi. I don't know why.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
b1gfan In reply to Tworoads [2010-03-08 03:51:54 +0000 UTC]
No reasons are necessary
It's enough that you like it.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
SonicShadowSilverLuv In reply to ??? [2010-03-06 18:11:09 +0000 UTC]
Oooh, i love the picture, also the story.
The story you wrote was really good.
Keep it up! <3
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
NJKay In reply to ??? [2010-03-05 07:59:28 +0000 UTC]
Haha. I love how you play with ambiguous phrases. Very good piece.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
ejectionletter In reply to ??? [2010-03-04 18:42:32 +0000 UTC]
ii. ii. ii. ii. ii.
absolutely adore it.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
b1gfan In reply to ejectionletter [2010-03-05 06:32:57 +0000 UTC]
And I you...thanks my friend
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
suan-la-tang In reply to ??? [2010-03-04 16:00:47 +0000 UTC]
Absolutely brilliant! I dig the way you handle these words- you throw em around and at the same time you weave them together with an expert delicacy.
Fantastic!
The first and last are my favorites.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
b1gfan In reply to suan-la-tang [2010-03-05 06:34:31 +0000 UTC]
That is amazingly flattering feedback Fancisco! How kind you are to me, it defies words. Many many thanks.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
suan-la-tang In reply to b1gfan [2010-03-05 15:22:48 +0000 UTC]
I'd love to say it's kindness... but it isn't. It's just true
No prob!
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
b1gfan In reply to Tworoads [2010-03-04 04:06:48 +0000 UTC]
Thanks Noah. I'm giving it my best.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Tworoads In reply to b1gfan [2010-03-04 23:07:31 +0000 UTC]
And kicking ass while doing it.
[had to say it.]
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
pseudometry In reply to ??? [2010-03-03 07:11:13 +0000 UTC]
Some pretty damn good lines in here. I'm especially fond of iii and iv: the pelagic moon, seemingly beneath but definitely part of the waves, and the 'chatter' of leaves is one of the best aural descriptions I've heard, of dried leaves in the wind; it evokes that sound of theirs perfectly.
Grand stuff.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
b1gfan In reply to pseudometry [2010-03-04 04:29:10 +0000 UTC]
That is delightful news to get my friend, music to my ears really Thanks so much Jamie, for reading, commenting, and being ...well, you!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
pseudometry In reply to b1gfan [2010-03-04 04:42:19 +0000 UTC]
Ah... my pleasure, my pleasure.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
KneelingGlory [2010-03-03 05:39:02 +0000 UTC]
iii. is easily my favorite. Beautifully worded! I like the close, too.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
somnomollior In reply to ??? [2010-03-02 14:48:50 +0000 UTC]
Gotta love talking leaves!
And I like the combo of moon and waves in the previous one.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
b1gfan In reply to somnomollior [2010-03-03 05:14:07 +0000 UTC]
Thank you - those leaves seem to have had a lot to say to me recently
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
underworldriver In reply to ??? [2010-03-02 05:11:57 +0000 UTC]
you've done it again! great job!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
b1gfan In reply to underworldriver [2010-03-02 07:00:33 +0000 UTC]
I'm like Britney Spears I guess
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
underworldriver In reply to b1gfan [2010-03-02 07:04:16 +0000 UTC]
LOL, that was a bad reference.
it's okay though. love ya, Dave.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
somnomollior In reply to ??? [2010-02-28 12:25:22 +0000 UTC]
ii - I like this very much. Are the other 'clouds' in the field creatures of some kind?
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
somnomollior In reply to ??? [2010-02-27 15:20:41 +0000 UTC]
Birds everywhere - a lovely image (your words and the picture you chose to accompany them).
There was a lot of uplifting bird song in our garden this morning.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
b1gfan In reply to somnomollior [2010-02-27 23:06:29 +0000 UTC]
There's much to be said of birds
I am glad you enjoyed it my friend.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
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