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Memories consume… Like opening the wounds, I’m picking me apart again…

It felt like a million years before Erik forced himself to take his eyes off of Curtis’s limp form and reach into his pocket for his phone. The screen only had a dim hue, signs that the phone was close to death. Erik sighed deeply and dialed 911, unsure of just how much longer the phone would last. It rang six times before a younger male voice picked up. Unfortunately, the voice on the other end was crackly and hard to understand. Erik fought on.
“Hello!” Erik exclaimed, hoping he didn’t sound equally as crackly on the phone’s other end. He waited for a few seconds, listening as the other end sounded like somebody was trying to talk to him.

You all assume, I’m safe here in my room, unless I try to start again…

“It’s my…. He…suici..di…he’s… dy..dyin…” Erik tried to speak, but everything he tried to stay was getting stuck in his throat. Curtis dying? the thought truly hadn’t hit him until the words were literally in his mouth, like word vomit. Curtis could die, and it would be all his fault. A moment later, there was a sudden static sound, signal that the phone had died. Now what could he do? He didn’t know anybody beside Curtis, Jace and Lewie. Erik knew that Jace was out of town, and would be impossible to reach, and Lewie…he never bothered to keep track of her, just like all his other co-workers. Chances are, they wouldn’t understand the situation anyway. His only real hope was the hospital. But without a phone, he couldn’t call the ambulance, and he didn’t know how else he could really get to the hospital.

I don’t want to be the one the battles always choose…

“I could drive him there!” Erik thought aloud. Sure, it wasn’t the perfect idea, and sure, there’s always a possibility he could get pulled over, but it sure beat trying to carry Curtis to the hospital. rushed back into the bathroom, and forced himself once again, look at Curtis’s limp form. Even if everything else worked out, he would still have to at least get Curtis to the car and into it. Then get him to the hospital.

Cause inside I realize, that I’m the one confused…

Erik rushed back over to Curtis and put a hand to his neck. Erik felt a dull thump beneath his fingers. Curtis was, at least for the moment, still alive. But Erik had to work fast. He went over to the cupboard and grabbed a large towel, he tore it in half. Then he wrapped a side around each of his wrists. Erik hoped that would at least slow Curtis’s bleeding until Erik could get him to a Doctor.

I don’t know what’s worth fighting for, or why I have to scream. I don’t know why I instigate, or say what I don’t mean, I don’t know how I got this way, I know it’s not alright. So I’m breaking the habit…

Erik bent down to the floor and carefully lifted Curtis up. Erik was surprised how light Curtis really was. So, in a quick thinking, Erik picked Curtis up off the ground and carried him to the car.

Tonight…
~
Erik was calm as he drove, which was surprising him, since he was thinking a million thoughts per second. Fortunately, one thing Erik was grateful for, is that he actually knew where the hospital was. So, while the driving felt like forever, he was able to get to the hospital quickly. Erik made no effort to park the car in the parking lot, instead he stopped at the front entrance and ran into the building. He went to the first person he saw and began to speak as quickly as he could.
“My friend…he’s…he…tried…suicide…tried….tried to cut his….his wrists…he needs help….he’s dying….please help…” Erik panicked as he spoke. But somehow, the nurse at the front desk understood what he was trying to say, and within a few minutes time, several doctor’s were rushing out to Erik’s car, pulling Curtis out of the front seat, and placing him on the hospital bed. Within a moment, Curtis was being raced off, to be taken away from him, to be helped by some doctor that he’d probably never met. Erik sighed heavily as he looked down the hall they had just taken Curtis down. He was alone with nothing but his ominous thoughts.
~
It had been at least two hours now, that Erik was in the waiting room. Still, nobody could give him any information about Curtis. In fact, the only person who had come out into the waiting room at all, was a manager who angrily forced him to move his car from it’s current location of in front of the walk way to the parking lot like everybody else or have it be towed. Erik had listened and drove the car over into the parking lot, and then came back into the waiting room once more, and that had been nearly half an hour ago. Erik stood up and paced around the waiting room for a little while as he tried to calm himself down. It had been nearly another hour and a half before somebody finally showed up in the room. By that time, Erik had long since stopped pacing and was now sitting, holding his head in his hands, almost as if to keep himself from falling apart.
“Mr.. X-” the doctor began. Erik looked up, and quickly went over to greet the man.
“Erik” he said, as he extended a hand to the doctor. “How is he Doctor?” Erik said in a nervous tone. The doctor flipped through some paper’s on a clipboard, before finally stopping at one and looking it over.
“Well…” The doctor trailed off.
“Well what?” Erik asked in a confused tone. The doctor sighed.
“Look. I don’t know how to say any other way, so I’m just going to come out with it. Mr….- I regret to inform you….” The doctor started. Erik grew numb. He didn’t need to hear anymore. He couldn’t bring himself to listen. The doctor’s words were muddled and drowned out in Erik’s mind. Curtis was dead. Curtis was dead and it was all his fault. He started it. He yelled at Curtis. He ruined the one thing that made Curtis hold on. He couldn’t save him. Erik couldn’t save Curtis, and he had no one to blame but himself. If he would have just apologi- No. he thought. it was long before that. If he would have never met Curtis, had never agreed to getting into the car, to never take any of his offers, then Curtis would still be alive. If he had just continued walking that day, and ignored Curtis’s kindness, he’d still be alive. But it didn’t matter now. Curtis’s blood was on his hands, and he couldn’t change it. Curtis was dead because of him, and nothing he could say or do would change that.
~

Description
Memories consume… Like opening the wounds, I’m picking me apart again…

It felt like a million years before Erik forced himself to take his eyes off of Curtis’s limp form and reach into his pocket for his phone. The screen only had a dim hue, signs that the phone was close to death. Erik sighed deeply and dialed 911, unsure of just how much longer the phone would last. It rang six times before a younger male voice picked up. Unfortunately, the voice on the other end was crackly and hard to understand. Erik fought on.
“Hello!” Erik exclaimed, hoping he didn’t sound equally as crackly on the phone’s other end. He waited for a few seconds, listening as the other end sounded like somebody was trying to talk to him.

You all assume, I’m safe here in my room, unless I try to start again…

“It’s my…. He…suici..di…he’s… dy..dyin…” Erik tried to speak, but everything he tried to stay was getting stuck in his throat. Curtis dying? the thought truly hadn’t hit him until the words were literally in his mouth, like word vomit. Curtis could die, and it would be all his fault. A moment later, there was a sudden static sound, signal that the phone had died. Now what could he do? He didn’t know anybody beside Curtis, Jace and Lewie. Erik knew that Jace was out of town, and would be impossible to reach, and Lewie…he never bothered to keep track of her, just like all his other co-workers. Chances are, they wouldn’t understand the situation anyway. His only real hope was the hospital. But without a phone, he couldn’t call the ambulance, and he didn’t know how else he could really get to the hospital.

I don’t want to be the one the battles always choose…

“I could drive him there!” Erik thought aloud. Sure, it wasn’t the perfect idea, and sure, there’s always a possibility he could get pulled over, but it sure beat trying to carry Curtis to the hospital. rushed back into the bathroom, and forced himself once again, look at Curtis’s limp form. Even if everything else worked out, he would still have to at least get Curtis to the car and into it. Then get him to the hospital.

Cause inside I realize, that I’m the one confused…

Erik rushed back over to Curtis and put a hand to his neck. Erik felt a dull thump beneath his fingers. Curtis was, at least for the moment, still alive. But Erik had to work fast. He went over to the cupboard and grabbed a large towel, he tore it in half. Then he wrapped a side around each of his wrists. Erik hoped that would at least slow Curtis’s bleeding until Erik could get him to a Doctor.

I don’t know what’s worth fighting for, or why I have to scream. I don’t know why I instigate, or say what I don’t mean, I don’t know how I got this way, I know it’s not alright. So I’m breaking the habit…

Erik bent down to the floor and carefully lifted Curtis up. Erik was surprised how light Curtis really was. So, in a quick thinking, Erik picked Curtis up off the ground and carried him to the car.

Tonight…
~
Erik was calm as he drove, which was surprising him, since he was thinking a million thoughts per second. Fortunately, one thing Erik was grateful for, is that he actually knew where the hospital was. So, while the driving felt like forever, he was able to get to the hospital quickly. Erik made no effort to park the car in the parking lot, instead he stopped at the front entrance and ran into the building. He went to the first person he saw and began to speak as quickly as he could.
“My friend…he’s…he…tried…suicide…tried….tried to cut his….his wrists…he needs help….he’s dying….please help…” Erik panicked as he spoke. But somehow, the nurse at the front desk understood what he was trying to say, and within a few minutes time, several doctor’s were rushing out to Erik’s car, pulling Curtis out of the front seat, and placing him on the hospital bed. Within a moment, Curtis was being raced off, to be taken away from him, to be helped by some doctor that he’d probably never met. Erik sighed heavily as he looked down the hall they had just taken Curtis down. He was alone with nothing but his ominous thoughts.
~
It had been at least two hours now, that Erik was in the waiting room. Still, nobody could give him any information about Curtis. In fact, the only person who had come out into the waiting room at all, was a manager who angrily forced him to move his car from it’s current location of in front of the walk way to the parking lot like everybody else or have it be towed. Erik had listened and drove the car over into the parking lot, and then came back into the waiting room once more, and that had been nearly half an hour ago. Erik stood up and paced around the waiting room for a little while as he tried to calm himself down. It had been nearly another hour and a half before somebody finally showed up in the room. By that time, Erik had long since stopped pacing and was now sitting, holding his head in his hands, almost as if to keep himself from falling apart.
“Mr.. X-” the doctor began. Erik looked up, and quickly went over to greet the man.
“Erik” he said, as he extended a hand to the doctor. “How is he Doctor?” Erik said in a nervous tone. The doctor flipped through some paper’s on a clipboard, before finally stopping at one and looking it over.
“Well…” The doctor trailed off.
“Well what?” Erik asked in a confused tone. The doctor sighed.
“Look. I don’t know how to say any other way, so I’m just going to come out with it. Mr….- I regret to inform you….” The doctor started. Erik grew numb. He didn’t need to hear anymore. He couldn’t bring himself to listen. The doctor’s words were muddled and drowned out in Erik’s mind. Curtis was dead. Curtis was dead and it was all his fault. He started it. He yelled at Curtis. He ruined the one thing that made Curtis hold on. He couldn’t save him. Erik couldn’t save Curtis, and he had no one to blame but himself. If he would have just apologi- No. he thought. it was long before that. If he would have never met Curtis, had never agreed to getting into the car, to never take any of his offers, then Curtis would still be alive. If he had just continued walking that day, and ignored Curtis’s kindness, he’d still be alive. But it didn’t matter now. Curtis’s blood was on his hands, and he couldn’t change it. Curtis was dead because of him, and nothing he could say or do would change that.
~