HOME | DD

catnipkitty — Envy
Published: 2007-08-04 20:02:31 +0000 UTC; Views: 86; Favourites: 1; Downloads: 0
Redirect to original
Description Your eyes burn with longing
As you spy two lovers
Embraced in the night

She was once yours
As he has her,
Wrapped tightly 'round
His strong build

Your ears burn
When she coos his name
Softly, sweetly
Yearning for the name to be yours

You are torn,
A tattered cloth
Blown away in the
Cold, frozen breeze
Of winter,
Forever forgotten

Enraged by what you cannot have
You lash out with fits of jealousy
Scorching the happy couple
With venomous words,
Cursing the day you found her...
Related content

[ TEXT ]


catnipkitty - Fae

catnipkitty - Shower Thoughts

catnipkitty - When We Sleep
Comments: 10

Infrunitas [2007-10-19 11:39:07 +0000 UTC]

I like how the observer sizes up the other male. You catch his full mindset well. Scary how well you know us!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

catnipkitty In reply to Infrunitas [2007-10-22 16:02:45 +0000 UTC]

Thanks! LoL. Well, I'm an observer and I'm pretty good at telling emotions.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Alchemy-of-the-Heart [2007-08-06 23:34:42 +0000 UTC]

The short stanzas work well here; for some reason they give a more classic flow to the poem without needing rhyme.

You added a g to "enraged" by the way.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

catnipkitty In reply to Alchemy-of-the-Heart [2007-08-07 04:41:13 +0000 UTC]

I origionally had the stanzas in a different order, but then I decided to change them around a bit. Thanks!

And thank you for telling me!! I was in a hurry when I was typing these up because we were expecting company, so I didn't get to really look at them before I submitted them.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Alchemy-of-the-Heart In reply to catnipkitty [2007-08-07 19:43:53 +0000 UTC]

Hm. I can't really picture them in any other order. It's funny how things change from paper to screen, ne?

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

catnipkitty In reply to Alchemy-of-the-Heart [2007-08-09 23:56:48 +0000 UTC]

Yeah. If I'm remembering correctly, I had the last stanza in a different place....I can't remember where exactly, but it changed anyway! When I looked at it though, I was like....."that doesn't work".

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

twentyonethirteen [2007-08-04 22:46:37 +0000 UTC]

*sigh* I think we've all felt that sometime or another x

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

catnipkitty In reply to twentyonethirteen [2007-08-05 20:39:25 +0000 UTC]

True..... Not a very nice thing to feel.......and it really does bad things to your health, what with stress levels and all that.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

twentyonethirteen In reply to catnipkitty [2007-08-05 22:29:44 +0000 UTC]

x

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

catnipkitty In reply to twentyonethirteen [2007-08-06 02:45:14 +0000 UTC]

👍: 0 ⏩: 0