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chugglepuff — Enzyme Song
Published: 2009-05-05 21:08:45 +0000 UTC; Views: 914; Favourites: 12; Downloads: 13
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Description
CHORUSOh, baby, won’t you be my substrate?
I wanna bind you in your transition state.
I wanna hold you at your cleavage site,
Won’t you let me be your catalyst tonight?
I promise I won’t ever try to change you,
Only hold you with my glutamic acid residue;
No, I won’t hydrolyse you and leave you bereft,
I’ll just keep you safe inside my hydrophobic cleft.
CHORUS
Won’t you let me show you my saturation kinetics?
I’m conjugated, baby, let me show you my prosthetics.
My Michaelis-Menten constant isn’t difficult to spot
If you know how to draw my Lineweaver-Burk plot.
CHORUS
There’s no need to dimerise to have a good time,
Oh baby, won’t you let me be your only enzyme?
Yeah darling, take it slow, we don’t have to be exact;
Let’s work out an induced fit and then we can react.
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Comments: 34
OMFukinG! I bow to your greatness! This Is brilliant. Love!
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...Well thank you very much! I'm glad you like it! 
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This is hilarious!
I wish I could think of something better to say, but it's 3:40 in the morning. I'll have to check the rest of your gallery tomorrow.
"No, I won’t hydrolyse you and leave you bereft,
I’ll just keep you safe inside my hydrophobic cleft."
Hahahaha, splendid.
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Thank you very much! 
Oh, and thanks for the fav, while I'm at it!
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I understand more of it now! I've had lectures on this stuff (enzymes, that is, not innuendo... well, I suppose I've sort of had lectures on innuendo in the pub but that's not what I meant)
I don't think I'll ever read anything else that makes a Michaelis-Menten constant sound sexy.
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*grin* Awesomesauce! How are lectures and university and all that jazz going, anyway? It seems like ages since we last internetted.
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It has been a while!
Uni's going pretty well on the whole, although I do feel quite overloaded with work (so I'm going on dA... hmm...) and I'm all nervous as always. But lectures are so interesting at the moment! I love being geeky and getting excited about reading a textbook on human physiology 
How's the second year? Do you still live on campus or have you had to move out?
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I'm really glad you're enjoying it!
The second year's going surprisingly well - I prefer it to last year. (For a start, I'm not doing maths...) Things are busy, but then that's to be expected.
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It's starting to seem more manageable this term! Lectures are mostly very good (I'm surprisingly enjoying epidemiology... which I feel ought to be boring, but I like it), practicals vary from going very well and boosting my confidence to being utterly disastrous. I'm hoping this means I'm okay at practical work as long as I stay calm.
Haha... what do you do that's not Maths?
My accommodation is very nice - en suite, with a large kitchen shared between 12 (this is not at all as bad as it sounds!). My room is massive (by my standards!), and I have wonderful hallmates. 
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That is so hilariously clever! I'm going to look at some of your other stuff now.
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Thank you very much indeed! And thanks for the fav, too!
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I know of a haiku contest you would probably enjoy. Would you like a link?
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Oooh, yes please! Are you going to be taking part in the haikuthon?
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'Tis not a DA contest...but I might anyway.
[link] Here you are!
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Thank you, looks like fun!
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hydrophobic cleft!
This gives new meaning to the chemistry of love.
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My pleasure! So good to see that you can squeeze in some creative writing in spite of your busy schedule at Cambridge. (Oh and sorry for my late reply to your reply!)
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That's actually very clever geeky comedy! Last line is brilliant.
I don't understand all of it, I suppose I can look forward to understanding more of this silliness when I get to uni.
Those naughty, naughty enzymes.
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Oh, and thank you for the fav, my dear ish of the me variety!
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That's an interesting thing to be called... I might put that as my new tag line
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*GRIN* I'm glad you like it! 
Yes, soon you will have all of this enzymey knowledge whizzing about your brain!
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I'm glad you wrote it!
I hope so 
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This is one of the funniest things I've seen in a long time!
Your chorus is gifted - it's so much funnier when you know that enzymes DO target a particular "cleavage site", and catalyse reactions! I'm killing myself laughing over this, I promise!
Yes, I realise it is less filthy than it sounds, but this:No, I won’t hydrolyse you and leave you bereft,
I’ll just keep you safe inside my hydrophobic cleft.just has to qualify as the filthiest-sounding innocent line ever!
I promise I won't ever try to change youis truly a great line, too.
Last word: Damn, you're good. Have you found a new calling?
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Thank you!!! You really are too kind, thank you so much!
Perhaps writing crude science songs is my destiny!
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You are, as always, very welcome. It's my pleasure.
Oh, I wouldn't call it crude - seemed quite polished and thoughtful to me (as long as that's the sense of crude you were using ... 
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i like the last line and the overall fun idea of this!
wow, i never would have thought of it. You're a clever lass!
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Evidence you are working too hard!
Or is it simply the latest release from The Chemical Boys?
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I think it's more likely to be evidence that I'm not working hard enough... 
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