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clinicallybeyondhelp — Hold Me
Published: 2006-03-07 21:54:14 +0000 UTC; Views: 196; Favourites: 1; Downloads: 13
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Description Don't sleep,
Not now,
Not while I lay here
Longing to be noticed,
Just wishing,
Hoping that one day
You will take me,
Ignore the others,
Will they need you?
Not like me.
I can't take this
Rejection of breath,
Stopping of beating.
Let me take you now
Somewhere
Far from the pain of complexity.
Today I want you,
Tomorrow it'll be more like need.
So hold me now,
Watch me bleed.
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clinicallybeyondhelp - Perspectives

clinicallybeyondhelp - Randomness
Comments: 18

rastill [2006-06-15 16:52:35 +0000 UTC]

yep, a simple flood of emotion to page is sometimes the best. I can't see anything I would change. Good flow, strong emotion..good stuff.

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clinicallybeyondhelp In reply to rastill [2006-06-15 17:36:33 +0000 UTC]

*giggles* aw. you make me feel all specialful. god. <3

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rastill In reply to clinicallybeyondhelp [2006-06-15 17:37:22 +0000 UTC]

*shuffles feet* aw shucks

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clinicallybeyondhelp In reply to rastill [2006-06-15 17:47:33 +0000 UTC]

its because you're great

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rastill In reply to clinicallybeyondhelp [2006-06-15 17:49:58 +0000 UTC]

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clinicallybeyondhelp In reply to rastill [2006-06-15 17:52:29 +0000 UTC]

x)

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i-am-wombat [2006-05-02 10:43:09 +0000 UTC]

wow.. Don't think it needs anything extra, its beutifull in its simplicity
love it char XD

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Letenastare [2006-03-17 14:40:39 +0000 UTC]

Incredibly strong. Hurts the reader I think...

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clinicallybeyondhelp In reply to Letenastare [2006-03-18 22:16:42 +0000 UTC]

Thankies very very much
xx

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andycyca [2006-03-09 19:29:39 +0000 UTC]

This doesn't need anynmore. Adding or sustracting words would spoil it. This is how you feel!!! Hope you feel better soon (or else, enjoy your angry moment)

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clinicallybeyondhelp In reply to andycyca [2006-03-13 20:21:41 +0000 UTC]

thankies
lovelove
xx

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hidinginthecloset [2006-03-08 17:07:42 +0000 UTC]

don't be sad anymore!

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clinicallybeyondhelp In reply to hidinginthecloset [2006-03-13 20:47:41 +0000 UTC]

aw. thanks.

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JadedIceStorm [2006-03-08 10:33:50 +0000 UTC]

Hope you feel better.

The poem in itself needs no work. If this is the way you are feeling, then this is how you show it in your writing. I do it all the time, my mood reflects my style of writing. This is really good work.

Much <3

Silver
Amber

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clinicallybeyondhelp In reply to JadedIceStorm [2006-03-13 20:48:00 +0000 UTC]

thanks amber.
<321

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JadedIceStorm In reply to clinicallybeyondhelp [2006-03-14 10:29:37 +0000 UTC]

welcome char, anytime

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the-Grim-Sage [2006-03-07 22:01:24 +0000 UTC]

Despite it's simplicity, this is nowhere near banality, and is not even a cliche. There is a lot of pain, and intensity - rather good. Very much so.
Don't really know why but these two really got to me
"Today I want you,
Tomorrow it'll be more like need."
Feel better, I suppose.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

clinicallybeyondhelp In reply to the-Grim-Sage [2006-03-08 20:10:43 +0000 UTC]

Thanks very very much.
xx

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