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Published: 2010-04-07 17:57:04 +0000 UTC; Views: 658; Favourites: 2; Downloads: 6
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"Haaah… haah… haah…" Hayate panted, falling to a knee. He leaned heavily on his arms, head bowed. Myriad wounds were scored across his body, and many bled; profusely, no less. "You…bastard…" Hayate murmured, forcing himself back to his feet unsteadily as he adopted a defensive stance.Standing in the street in front of him, a middle aged man smirked, muscles rippling with every movement as he stabbed a two handed broadsword into the ground. With quick strides he advanced, grabbing Hayate by the neck of his shirt and lifting him with as much ease of a woman lifting a child.
"Feh. Worthless. And you call yourself a fighter?" he chided, tapping Hayate on the forehead with his free hand gently. "Your justice and ideals may be strong, but you lack any real power…" He drifted his hand back, thrusting Hayate away from him. The lad thudded into the ground, rolling head over heels along the smooth ground. He groaned, forcing himself back to his feet through a sheer effort of will, eyes glazed over.
"Damn it, don't underestimate me!" Hayate muttered, shaking his head to clear it. He stumbled forward, lifting his head. He balled his fist, launching a strike that the man avoided easily, pushing Hayate to the floor facefirst.
"You should give up. This is just pathetic," he sneered, pressing a foot against Hayate's back. "You gave such a pathetic fight. Rejoice! I won't be killing you. Easy kills have never been my style…"
"Y-You…bastard…" came the reply, as weak as a wisp of smoke. "W-Who…are you?" he shouted in pain, the stranger's foot burying itself in his stomach, propelling him against a wall. "Wa-Wait!! Stop…" Hayate murmured as darkness started to encompass his vision. 'No way. Am I dying?' he wondered, forcing himself back to his feet with immense difficulty. Blood dripped from his wounds, falling on the ground in a crimson rain. He stumbled, a hand wrapped around his stomach as he slowly walked back to the street. He paused, turning back to look at the smooth stone pier, the pier where he had just tasted the bitterness of defeat. Blood was splattered all along its length, most of it his own.
"Heh…that…bastard…" he muttered, turning and walking back to the empty highway. He stumbled as he crossed it, falling to his hands on it, his face ashen. 'The bleeding isn't stopping…am I going to die?' He shook his head, a great weariness starting to take over his body. 'I need to…get back to town. Guess I'm walking it. I don't have a phone to call for help…' He shook his head, leaning heavily against the wall; his body refused to support his weight alone. With a slow, stumbling gait, he started to walk. 'That man…who was he? How did I lose…?' He held back a yelp of pain, a small stick sending him too his knees. 'What is he after? Why can't I move my body right? Am I dying? Is this the end for me?'
"Roxy…Hiro…Kina…" he muttered, doing his best to force himself back to his feet. It was no good. His weary legs weighed him down like a stack of lead blocks. "I'm sorry. I guess… I couldn't keep my promise…huh?" He muttered, lifting his steadily darkening gaze to the heavens.
'Is that it? You're going to accept your death. Just like that?' a voice sounded, from far away it seemed.
The simple question pierced Hayate's heart, memories resurfacing through the haze; the time he had met Hiro, the simplistic, spoiled rich kid that always acted so tough. When he'd saved Kina, risking his own life and limb to pull her out of a burning building. The first time he'd met Roxy in battle, which had been fought to a draw. Tears formed in his eyes as he swallowed, clenching his fists with whatever strength he could muster.
"N-No…I don't want to die. Not now. I…I said I'd be back…" A single, solitary tear slid down his cheek, followed by another. And yet, he still couldn't move even a muscle.
'Really? You want to live? You don't seem like it…'
"Yes…I want to live. I…have to. I need to get back…for those who call me 'friend'."
"Well, that's not the BEST reason to decide to live, but, I'll accept that for now," sounded a voice, deafening in its strength as its owner knelt. Hayate felt something rest against his forehead, something massive, yet at the same time, it felt so warm and gentle…that warmth and gentility surrounded Hayate, encompassing him as the warmth grew to a crescendo, his body seeming to almost burn from the heat. "Now, be more careful next time. You can only get so far relying on emotion, you know?"
Hayate opened his eyes wide, staring down at his body. The wounds were all gone, as if they had never been. The only remnants that they had ever been were his slashed shirt, and the blood stains. "Oh, wow! Thanks sir, that was ama-" He stopped in midsentence, staring at what he saw before him; a pair of lips that were bigger then he was, a pointed tooth sticking out of one end.
"Sir! I'm a girl!" The lips spoke, pouting. Hayate took a quick step back, blinking in shock as he stared up at the face before him. A gold and silver eye looked down on him from above, underneath the cascading waterfall that was her blue bangs. Above those bangs, a pair of raven black cat ears sat, perked up. A ribbon hung in her hair, cutely. "My name's Kara, and it's quite rude to call me a sir! A man wouldn't have these!" She shouted, putting a hand to her generous bust.
"M-My bad…" Hayate murmured, waving a hand nervously. "Sorry…"
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Comments: 18
JoeyTheNeko [2010-04-10 02:07:08 +0000 UTC]
cool. I wonder who that was he was fighting. maybe he will appear in your other stories?
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
daimondstrike In reply to JoeyTheNeko [2010-04-10 06:02:58 +0000 UTC]
Yup! He's a recurring villian that I'm gonna have! Havn't decided anything about him yet though.
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JoeyTheNeko In reply to daimondstrike [2010-04-10 17:42:36 +0000 UTC]
nice. is hayate going to train like crazy to beat him next time?
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daimondstrike In reply to JoeyTheNeko [2010-04-11 09:09:25 +0000 UTC]
You'll have to wait and see
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DaTinies [2010-04-08 02:44:42 +0000 UTC]
When you say "middle Aged", do you mean a 40 year old, old person, or a like a person between young and middle aged? cuz when i read it i thought the middle age guy was 60
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Indiewayne [2010-04-07 18:25:45 +0000 UTC]
In medias res is always so confusing. oO
But, alas, ab initio is not suited for this kind of short stories, is it?
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
daimondstrike In reply to Indiewayne [2010-04-07 18:43:49 +0000 UTC]
I have no idea what you just said sry.
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Indiewayne In reply to daimondstrike [2010-04-07 18:46:57 +0000 UTC]
Long story short:
in medias res: you start the story 'in the middle'
ab initio: you start from the beginning.
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daimondstrike In reply to AntiHitler [2010-04-07 18:06:05 +0000 UTC]
Yeah, a little I wonder if I wrote it ok? First time I wrote this kind of situation.
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AntiHitler In reply to daimondstrike [2010-04-07 18:12:10 +0000 UTC]
Writing itself was...good. Some dialogue didn't really float my boat, but it's just my opinion. Don't really see where it's going, though. IS it going anywhere?
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daimondstrike In reply to AntiHitler [2010-04-07 18:43:18 +0000 UTC]
Not exactly. This may be expanded upon in a further chapter, but this chapter in itself is meant more to show how Hayate and Kara meet, since School Style/Neko Blitz is a 'Standalone' project. (I mean, you're not gonna tell me that you thought they knew each other since way back when.) And I'd love to hear what was wrong with the dialogue, if you don't mind ^^ I'm always eager to hear comments along those lines.
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AntiHitler In reply to daimondstrike [2010-04-07 18:53:29 +0000 UTC]
I'm not sure how to describe it... It just...didn't click with me. I guess a little on the corny side might describe it, but... I don't know, melodramatic, maybe... Something along those lines. Like a 'nobody would say or do that in real life' moment. Know what I mean?
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daimondstrike In reply to AntiHitler [2010-04-07 19:01:19 +0000 UTC]
Hm, alright then.I'll give you that. Though on the melodramatic side, I could probably see myself saying and thinking along those same lines But yeah, I do see what you mean.
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