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Daniel-Link — Puppet Zelda
Published: 2008-10-08 21:30:01 +0000 UTC; Views: 48644; Favourites: 1791; Downloads: 0
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Ganon's Puppet Zelda!!!!! yay!
I like so much the battle against Zelda when she is possessed by Ganondorf.
hope you like it!!!!
comments?
don't forget to see my others drawings
Art © me, dont steal or use without my permission
Princess Zelda is Copyright © from Nintendo, The Legend of Zelda, Twilight Princess
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Comments: 319
On the behalf of my sister....FUCK YOU, YOU LAZY STUPID PORN JUNKIE! And once in your life, try redesign Puppet Zelda into something different opposed to the Normal Zelda, something more fitting in the style as "The Thing", "The Exorcist" and "Evil Dead" like literally a dirty wretched psychotic vulgar hideous ghoul with completely loose yet thinner greasier fewer strains of hair dangling on her bald head and a wider lip-less crooked-toothed Joker-like grin on her skull-like flat face, dressed in nothing but a tatter bikini-like set of rags (with no crown, no armor, no earrings, no ribbons, no gloves, no boot) an ghoul who doesn't need a rapier and light she could attack only with claws, fangs and slimy black acid vomit! It'll be more interesting or fun if only Puppet Zelda as a zombie orc-like monster a ultra sense of purely crude ugliness (rather than regal beauty/elegance) and led straight to increasingly gory mayhem, all of which Nintendo developers are too stupid and lazy (very much like you BTW) to do it! How that's that, you numbskull?!
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Well my sister, Anti-Twili didn't like. Why should she excited about this 'Puppet Zelda' bullshit when she was only expected TP!Zelda to a playable character rather than this. Since then, Anti-Twili still pretty pissed off about it. Yeah, that's right, she only likes a 'Normal Zelda' , and she said that yellow eyes and grey skin with Twili-tattoos looks stupid on TP!Zelda as they only made her into an utterly evil parallel of the already-evil Queen Azshara.
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Wow! This looks amazing, I'm planning to get Twilight Princess but the art is truly amazing!! I love LoZ so much
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My sister prefers 'Puppet Zelda' to be much uglier and more savage in appearence than a 'Normal Zelda', and should wearing nothing but the 14-century-old prisoner tattered rags too!
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Of course he's blind, blinded by his own idiocy!
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My sister, Anti-Twili, yelled: ' YOU GOTTA BE FUCKING KIDDING ME!! As an hardcore "Evil Dead" fan I know the big difference between characters who are cynical assholes and those who are actually unwitting victims of an virus-like demonic possession. Cynical assholes are usually born narcissistic self-serving villains, they appear to look normal and clean in neat expensive clothes, they can fight with literal weapons of their choice like swords or guns and won't risk loosing a limb or two even during the combat. Possessed victims are once normal-looking (even harmless) people who happen to be caught up in the trap and became affected by an unnatural force that twisting them and changing into something less than human, now they appeared to be crazy and violent with a lack of hygiene, sense of crude ugliness, a total disregard of their own safety and even a act of cannibalism, they attack only by biting, clawing and vomiting-- sometimes can using any sharp strong object as a murder weapon such as a broken piece of glass or a pair of scissors or box-cutter or a knife or an chainsaw or a crowbar like any low-class maniac would do--they fully focused their prey even if it means loosing their body-parts.
So as far as I can see it, while Telltale!Riddler is a cynical asshole who really looks and acts like a cynical asshole, Twilight!Zelda became a possessed victim to Ganondorf but she ends up looking and acting more like a cynical asshole to my eyes than a genuine possessed victim as she was supposed to be .
WAKE UP AND SMELL A FEAR TOXIN, YOU PIECE OF SHIT ! I'll say it again, possessed victims are not suppose to be as sexy as they were on their own willpower, you know!'
Well?
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What's with video games and possessed good characters as bosses? This game had two of them, right? Anyway, nice job!
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would you mind if i drew this? ill credit you in the description ovcourse
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Puppet Zelda still kinda freaks me out. But, heck, half of TP freaks me out. XD I especially like her tiara and the shininess of it. ^_^
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link i knew it ganondorf does have something in the closet other than clothes
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My sister said that Telltale!Riddler would be a great stalker for Twilight!Zelda...but only with 'Puppet/possessed Zelda' is completely and utterly adapted out, of course, so it won't remind him of both Amenda Waller and Harley Quinn, right? She made her own fan-fiction project called "Twilight Apocalypse" as revenge against the Nintendo developers for featuring this godawful unfair 'fuck-you' moment that left her scarred for life, she fully portray it as an 'No Puppet-Zelda Zone' and 'All Normal-Zelda Territory'...and she also casts Telltale!Riddler as an antagonist of "Twilight Apocalypse" (as he was that of "The Enigma", the first episode in "Batman, The Telltale Series 2: The Enemy Within) and as better villain than the gold-fever douche Ganondolf because Riddler would never actually possessing people, in fact he's more interested in shoveling them in his murder-boxes.
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Very good! While I will say, poor Zelda, I have to say I liked her design while it lasted, lol. It always struck me that when someone like Zelda or Peach is possessed, some people like them for that now. I wonder why that is.....
Anyways, love the artwork!
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It looks Like the real artwork
It's kinda scary though xDDD!~!
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OMG When Zelda had Gannondorf's voice I was like "WTF I've been mindfucked!!!!!!!!!!!!"
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So has my sister! She was not impressed at all, that's reason why she hates this kind of character in TP!Zelda.
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What the hell is wrong with people! 'Puppet Zelda' is the most suck-ass thing my sister even seen, it sucks ass, it sucks balls, it just plain sucks! My sister personally prefers a 'Normal Zelda', mind you.
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My sister said: 'HOW IN THE HELL COME THAT 'PUPPET ZELDA' IS NOT UGLY AND TRASHY IN APPEARANCE ?! You should have drew her as an hideous ghoul in rags, not beautiful maiden in riches, you porno-junkie of a brainless asshole !'
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And yet while at it Zelda didn't became a hideous-looking ghoul with self-harm-induced facial-horror/body-horror (Darbus the Goron and Yeta the Yeti did when they were possessed) and didn't ended up wearing filthy rags for go-go enslavement, that's also the reason why my sister hates this. She did say that 'Puppet Zelda' looks more like an cynical asshole than an actual possessed victim.
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That's a good point in terms of how she was affected. Also, since I'm playing TP again after two years... I'm starting to pick up on the points that you've made.
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Are you ready to hear more? Hope you not angry.
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Why would I be angry? I'm confused
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Good, but read very closely from top to bottom while I'm explaining this to you. Don't jump into any conclusions while you at it.
So as you see, TP!Zelda being a prisoner in the tower, doing nothing and having less screen-time throughout the game was quite bad enough...but my sister wasn't excited about having 'Puppet Zelda' officially confirmed in "Twilight Princess", yeah the very part which she never actually had in mind, she's just confused (even more so than you) and pissed off...big time. To her, it is always the boring, uncool, irrational and unsatisfying thing to do, there's more to it, so yeah, I got more points about the subject on her behalf. Praise yourself because it's very a long one.
You have absolutely have no idea what sort of the mental breakdown my sister have suffered for 13 years. She hated the whole story of the game because she been traumatized by it, despite that it was the first game of the very franchise she had beaten, since twelve years when she herself played it for six or more times already to try to understand the story proper but failed miserably when she merely it's just as equally lazy and randomly stupid as "Mortal Kombat 2", "The Family Guy" and later ten years "PowerPuff Girls Reboot 2016" cartoon and modern Disney's "Star Wars" films and she fed up with it. She even already did her research of the franchise right after "The Legend Of Zelda 2: The Adventure Of Link", which was originally the first game she tried to beat as a kid until years later we got a computer, strategy guide and cheat codes when we got older. The whole official plot for "Twilight Princess" is all out there, and she thought she understood everything.
She even renting an Nerd Rent (which she took from AVGN and use in order to speak her mind out) "In conclusion some might say that there are redeeming factors for the three Phillips CD-I "Legend Of Zelda" spin-off games released in 1993. The music's music pretty cool and the graphics are nice and colorful, some might call it a mixed bag. But let me tell you what kind of mixed bag, it's a trash bag that's had a bad day, like say your mom cleans the cat litter fresh and stale duty pebbles go right in the bottom of the bag and then your sister throws out the used tampons and where do they go...in the same bag and then your brother comes home piss-ass drunk just up trucks pukes right into the bag! Now I'm not trying to be disgusting but that is a realistic situation and what it all comes down to, that's the nasty bag but I rather take that shit out to the garbage than deal with the games that are so hard and painful for my fingers and would wastes my time when I tried to win. Though, luckily, I never played Phillips CD-I games, I only watched the cut-scenes from them on YouTube. And that's when I first thought that it's notorious for its legendary ass-suckage until "Legend Of Zelda: Twilight Princess" came--not from Phillips CD-I but directly from Nintendo and on Game-cube and Wii--though music and graphics are also neat and the controls are pretty smoother for my fingers, but the only thing that bugs me the most is the whole plot...I mean, what did I get when I start played it? I get a shower of 'fuck-you' moments right onto my face and 'Ganon's Puppet Zelda' is the biggest of them all! Well, guest what I response to a 'fuck-you' moment? I simply said 'FUCK YOU!!' while I flip my third, I meant my middle finger. God, as bad as a 'Dancing Emo Peter Parker' in "Spider-Man 3" and every-bit as annoying as Samantha James singing 'Forgiveness' in "Just Friends", the 'Ganon's Puppet Zelda' battle theme is also cringe-worthy and obnoxious...sheer lunacy and torture to my eyes and ears! So I now considered "Twilight Princess", the "Legend Of Zelda" mainstream, as a mixed trash-bag with the bad month, a lot worse than the Phillips CD-I spin-off! Could it be any more un-creative than that? Look, why don't they just add The Scarecrow and The Mad Hatter, and add some bland sparkly slutty vampires and shirt-hating fortune-telling were-wolves and more killer clowns for mind-fucks, and the ghosts of the Joker and the Penguin, as well as the return of Catwoman? They should have just called the game "Batman: Twilight Apocalypse", which is probably what they originally had in mind right after "Batman & Robin" until thought 'No! Wait! Make another Legend-Of-Zelda mainstream game! Because Christopher Nolan and the Rock-Steady Studios already beat us to it! And what about the film directors Burton and Schumacher? Been there! Done that!'...I'm not going to say who's working in Nintendo Game corp. and whose idea it is but it stands for laugh and joke and numb-nuts, which is not really funny, either! They created 'Puppet Zelda', but for what purpose? For male gamers and nerds to jacking themselves off with pleasure while looking at this soft-core porn abomination? (luckily, my brother isn't one of them!) What were they thinking!? I don't believe this! Like, I seriously don't believe this! How could they fuck up one of their own iconic creations this bad? It's not a faithful Zelda game, I wouldn't call it that. They kept saying 'Oh, but it is. It has Zelda in it, it has Link.' carelessly. Look, anyone who watches "Evil Dead" franchise all time don't jack themselves off like retards, not even the demonic rapist trees could spice it up...just simple traditional jump-scares. Yeah, you know what? That's a pointless argument right there. That's like if your dad says 'I fucked your mom' all day! It's like...like I can't argue with that. You may think CD-I is pretty suck, think again! You know, playing "Twilight Princess" is as worthwhile as melting as a dog turd that is Holli Would on a frying pan that is "The Legend Of Zelda" franchise itself. Yeah, put some buffalo puke that is Azula and some cat piss that Azshara all over it, and you have a cold expressionless yet smug-faced shit sandwich that is 'Ganon's Puppet Zelda' existence, which is my fucking nightmare...it's a frustrating incoherent pile of vomit and shit, it's absolutely fucking sucks! Everybody calls it 'Ganon's Puppet Zelda', but call it 'Skanky/Slutty Turncoat White-Faced Prick Zelda', because it looks more like a soft-core back-stabbing seductress as Holli Would from "Cool World" rather than a hard-core horribly-deformed battered possessed victim as Daphne from "Dragon Lair 2"...the character is so heinous that the Nintendo staff made Amanda Waller looked like Mary Poppins! I say again, 'Puppet Zelda' is not cool nor funny nor cute/sexy, it's not even scary, it's just plain stupid, lazy, cheesy and suck-ass! I think I'm gonna apologizing Phillips CD-I officials for saying something rude about their games, right now.", these are her very words I described. While at it "Twilight Princess" makes her feel like she's not really playing the "Legend Of Zelda" video-game at all but rather watching "The Queen Of The Damned"/"Dogma" as another Disney Pixar movie with an unexpected villain since Stinky Pete from "Toy Story 2" as if based on "Warcraft: War Of The Ancients" and "Neon Genesis Evangelion" mixed together with "Mean Girls"/"The Notebook" and produced/directed by Micheal Bay and Tom Green. Do you know how it feels like, to get mind-raped by the very things you didn't expect to see?
She doesn't really care about happen to Midna whatsoever, and she's not a mad-cow-jizz-drinking Luke Skywalker sucker-type of person (like some people including First-4-Figures and Daniel-Link, if possible as she put it) that lost her mind, she's more a bat-credit-card-hating Nostalgia Critic kicker-type that came to her senses. In fact she personally prefer a 'Normal Zelda' only, and she really wanted to support "Twilight Princess" only if 'Puppet Zelda' doesn't exist in first place. Clearly being a 'puppet', a word so ungodly outrageous and insulting that it barely sounded like anything heroic, it rather means that Zelda is certainly sounded more fitting for a non-heroic character that accurately portrayed as a hate-sink...a hate-sink who is sleazy selfish traitorous vain coward who gleefully accepted bribes and willingly sold own country to the evil forces she cheerfully joins just like Queen Azshara (and Zant, respectively) did...a hate-sink who's also an hypocrite that constantly saying that her power 'holy golden light magic' are only deadly to evil when she herself actually using them to personally commit evil deeds instead, against the good folk, the weakest and the most innocent alike...a hate-sink who is a bland yet spineless pussy that is full of shit to the point that she became a sadistic conniving asshole herself, plus Ganondorf is indeed shit (my sister uses a swearing-speech reference from "Team America World Police"). My sister think that 'Puppet Zelda' is the insanely stupidest and laziest idea she had ever seen--as she described as a biggest 'fuck-you' moment (while Midna being the titular Twilight Princess herself is the second biggest)--and she totally against it, and she also said that Nintendo should have thought it earlier for either "Ocarina Of Time" (the fourth game she have beaten) or "A Link To The Past" (her very second game) to confirm this piece of delusional garbage right away so "Twilight Princess" wouldn't have to. Plus it would be also fine to have a 'Puppet Zelda' if only featured in non-canon Phillips CD-I spin-off games since nobody give the damn about them because their concepts and game-plays are so ugly and weirdly twisted that which is accurately perfect for 'Puppet Zelda' as well, way better than in this game. Isn't that so hard? My sister always say that TP!Zelda looks so stupid with yellow eyes and a paled tattooed crook's skin...and boy, she's genuinely right, and one time I did vomit! When I looking at this picture, 'Puppet Zelda' really does look like sleazy hypocritical loser meshed-up of Holli Would, Azula and Azshara--each of all three who is always the embodiment of 'smug snake'/'manipulative bitch in the sheep's clothing' whose 'beauty is bad/evil is sexy' while never as that of 'evil makes you ugly and monstrous' with self-inflicted 'facial/body horror' due to the 'demonic possession' supposedly naturally yet rationally associate with in the "Evil Dead" logical way. the hate-sink kind of princess is more likely full-fledged villain, not a hero nor a damsel-in-distress...yeah, if she is a villain, then any hero (namely Link) in the right mind would have stay away from her because she will play him for a sap every time--just like Holli Would, Azula and Azshara did--this is what very concept 'Puppet Zelda' looked like. Have you ever watched "Dragon's Lair 2" walk-through? It's a good example! Princess Daphne was 'unwillingly' corrupted by dark powers of the Ring of Doom which psychically transformed her into the large warty cannibalistic land-pig version of Ursula the Sea-Witch...rather than altered her from a sexy yet innocent selfless black-clad longer-haired blonde to Holli Would the overly-slutty depraved selfish white-clad shorter-haired blonde. That's how it accurately and rationally works, not like this! Got it?
In fact, my sister admitted that she loves TP!Zelda but personally prefers a 'Normal Zelda' alone, not like this. And that when she collects Normal-Zelda-only pictures and playing "Super Smash Bros" to do justice. According to her, she was expecting that the Nintendo officials were planning to portraying Princess Zelda as a playable character in "Twilight Princess" like they did with Princess Peach from "Super Mario Brothers 2" to "Super Princess Peach" right after learning the mistakes from Phillips CD-I, given the character an deep, situational and emotional perspective inherent to the story based on what's relevant and has a point...but it was all denied when she start playing it, and what she got instead was this disgrace--a fucking letdown of soft-core proportions, this sleazy over-exaggerating Disney-Princess/Barbie/Sailor-Moon reject induced with the freak of "Evil Dead" logical nature! She really wanted to support "Twilight Princess" only if 'Puppet Zelda' doesn't exist in the first place. She made her fan-fiction fan-art projects according to her earlier expectations: one is based on "A Link To The Past" but has a 'Puppet Zelda' in it, while other one is based on "Twilight Princess" but has nothing to do with 'Puppet Zelda' whatsoever that means it's 'all-Normal-Zelda' territory. So as 'Normal Zelda', TP!Zelda is cool and bad-ass enough when with her own willpower alone! Okay, I admit that Philips CD-I has a really shitty game design, but at least the people responsible for those those 1993 games actually are more creative when it comes in given Princess Zelda a sword of her own, and a lot more decent and respectful because they portrayed her as a playable character, not a boss, they didn't even include a 'demonic possession' interference which Zelda herself doesn't need to get involve her sword-fighting scenes...unlike the Nintendo professionals who butchered Zelda--one of their own iconic characters and legacies--by turning her into nothing but an intentional cheap shot! They treated her as a random interchangeable joke they pulled to fucked my sister over! What bigoted shallow-minded assholes are they are, with the same mentality of the porn-junkie Tadao Yokoshima from the anime "Ghost Sweeper Mikami" refuses to quit his part-time job as a assistant because his boss Mikami is the hot sexy woman regardless of her mean bossy personality, and also with same intellect of the sea-cows who were in charge of written the pointless gags for "The Family Guy", seriously!
Oh, by the way, have you ever heard the meaning in term of 'evil makes you ugly and monstrous' trope? Have you even watched "Evil Dead" movies? That's a crash course, a friendly reminder. so please don't compare to "Evil Dead" to this poorly written train-wreck of "The Legend Of Zelda" mainstream video-game, because while he possesses her body Ganondorf is a sloppy ignoramus who's too fucking lazy and stupid to actually transform Zelda literally into a grotesque foul-smelling cannibalistic monster that would normally led straight to the increasingly gory mayhem, and he's too lazy to even dolled her up in much less-fancier/more-trashier clothes that are not of her own choice . If you like 'Puppet Zelda' as a hideous ghoul (a ghoul with a total lack of not just willpower and compassion, but also dignity, decency, humanity and self-respect) in dirty rags better than this, you can draw her as a deformed yet unarmed monster with the fewer yet shorter thinner greasier strains of hair dangling on her nearly bald head, the same posture and body-shape as the Shadow Beast, spinning like a tornado in the same style as Zant but only with claws and eight long spikes grown from her own forearms, shoulders and back, running in high speed on all fours while appearing from a portal like Dark Beast Ganon later on, and that can puke slimy black acid and bigger sword (the one Ganon took from the ghostly sages after survived being stabbed with it) from her own mouth which is larger, blue (including blue tongue) and filled with sharp yet crooked teeth with two long tusks exactly like Dark Beast Ganon while in a more psychotic grin very much like the Joker's but without lips. Isn't that also so hard? 'Puppet Zelda' deserves to have a ultra sense of crude ugliness, you know! Trust me, the 'Puppet Zelda' crap is already a legitimately disgusting, embarrassing, fucked-up mess that totally make my sister sick to her stomach way before she re-imagines it as something more fitting than this, anyway. The damage has already been done--to both Zelda and my sister--and the Nintendo staff members should be ashamed of themselves.
Again about "Dragon's Lair 2" as a reminder, if Don Bluth portrays Daphne's corrupted/possessed form as a grotesque monster...why the hell didn't Nintendo staff do the same thing to Zelda's? One more time; 'Normal Zelda' is an embodiment of regal wisdom, beauty and grace that wields 'holy golden light magic', while 'Puppet Zelda' is accurately an embodiment of savage madness, crude ugliness and vulgarity that could wield 'slimy black acid/tar vomit' as it should have been, it supposed to be different between the two forms...okay? That is how my sister is different than most people: to make herself feel better her own drawings have always portray 'Puppet Zelda' as hard-core a savage crude ugly hag-like monster (something that crosses between Gollum and Dr. Death) in filthy ratty rags--as if either resulted by decades of glutenous drinking and smoking or her plastic surgery constantly collapsing due to old age (even though still young, currently at her 20's)--and never as an soft-core majestic elegant beautiful warrior-maiden in shiny regal riches! I mean, come on, 'Puppet Zelda' can be scary only when she's wrenched and ugly in appearance, and vicious and savage like an animal with rabies in personality beyond reason! At least Mr. Bluth is is not a sloppy ignoramus, either...unlike those Nintendo schmucks. Yes, my sister seriously, genuinely and utterly despises 'Puppet Zelda' to no end, and she's very frustrated, gotten really sick and tired of seeing 'Puppet Zelda' being only exist "Twilight Princess" related tags and folders from fan-art to fan-fiction and cosplay, and someday that 'Puppet Zelda' will be either permanently adapted out from "Twilight Princess" for good or portrayed as a hideous ghoulish monster who dresses in dirty rags and doesn't need a sword it's got claws and fangs while added into "A Link To The Past" and legitimately considered as one of the 'ugliest chicks in gaming'. To be honest, she pretty likes TP!Zelda as a 'Normal Zelda' a lot better, thank you very much.
Well? What do you think? She purposely drew the rationally uglier/rattier/trashier 'Puppet Zelda' pictures just to make herself feel better and added onto her own version of "A Link To The Past" as revenge. You can drew your own pictures in the same way as she does while the Nintendo developers (so are those who runs First-4-Figures co.) are too lazy and stupid and they have no spine to do so. You see, she prefers possessed characters as ugly, filthy and monstrous just like the ones from "Evil Dead" vigorously. Sorry, my sister and I didn't mean to disrespect you or Daniel-Link's art skills for that matter but this the serious, it's just that she's grown really frustrated, sick and tired of seeing 'Puppet Zelda' existed in the Twilight-Princess-only tags and folders (though she doesn't really care about "Spirit Tracks" because for DS and has the same concept as "Wind Waker"), and it was all Nintendo's own fault she's been like that since 2006, this is her honest yet personal opinion, hope you forgive us both. Let me know what you think other than how long it is when I texted all this to you.
P.S.
Since "Batman The Telltale Series 2: The Enemy Within" came in August 2017, my sister occasionally uses its incarnation of The Riddler (who is hard-core in "Saw" logic which does not need a 'demonic possession' whatsoever, and is more lethal, threatening and intimidating in the rational way than that lame-ass 'Ganon's Puppet Zelda' bullshit) as a stress-reliever to calm herself down, which she does for two years. Heck, even Telltale!Riddler's theme is a whole lot catchier than that godawful 'Ganon's Puppet Zelda' battle theme. That's it, end of story. Take care!
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I'm sorry. I didn't know. When you asked if I was upset, I didn't know what you were talking about since it's been years--let alone, seeing the picture this conversation is under. But I will remember never to post a comment again so this doesn't happen.
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Fair enough. That 'Ganon's Puppet Zelda' idea that the Nintendo officials put up with was rather stupid and short-sighted anyway. I'm glad that you understand my sister's situation and sanity, she'll appreciate it. Bye, then.
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Oh my God, it looks like an actual screenshot from the game! This is amazing!
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Seriously I made this account specifically to ask that.
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I wanna use this pic as a profile pic for an admin. Can I pleeeeeeeeeese?
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Wow! She looks so cool! Who knew she looks good even with those designs on her face.
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My sister said that TP!Zelda looks cool but only as a 'Normal Zelda' quite enough, and with only blue eyes and normal clear flesh-colored skin, thank you very much. a 'Puppet Zelda' is plain sucks and stupid!
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Dude, do you hate 'Puppet Zelda'?
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No. I think this picture is jaw dropping amazing. But judging by your other comments, I take you're not a fan.
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Just asking. Actually I'm more a "My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic" fan and I much prefer playing older games from the 80's and early 90's, so I don't play any of Wii games (except "Sonic Colors") and it's kind of true enough the fact I'm honestly not a fan to "The Legend Of Zelda" because I felt neither hate nor love "The Legend Of Zelda" games that much often. You see, on the other hand, I only doing this on my sister's behalf. You have no idea what she have been through for 12 years, because 'Puppet Zelda' is legitimately jaw-dropping awful and disgusting to her. Yep, she's the one who played "Twilight Princess" on the Wii and no matter how many time does play it to try to understand the story she fails miserably and realizes it just stupid and lazy as if it was written by monkeys. And that 'Puppet Zelda', my sister was never excited about it, she just confused and pissed-off big time, and muttered 'Here lies Princess Zelda, born in 1987, died in 2006' in the state of depression. I'm not kidding, she constantly viewing '' as nothing but--as she puts it--a disgrace, a fucking letdown of a soft-cord proportions worth of vomiting. And please don't jump into any of conclusions when I explaining this to you.
She even already did her research of the franchise right after "The Legend Of Zelda 2: The Adventure Of Link", which was originally the first game she tried to beat as a kid until years later we got a computer, strategy guide and cheat codes when we got older. The whole official plot for "Twilight Princess" is all out there, and she thought she understood everything.
She even renting an Nerd Rent (which she took from AVGN and use in order to speak her mind out) "In conclusion some might say that there are redeeming factors for the three Phillips CD-I "Legend Of Zelda" spin-off games released in 1993. The music's music pretty cool and the graphics are nice and colorful, some might call it a mixed bag. But let me tell you what kind of mixed bag, it's a trash bag that's had a bad day, like say your mom cleans the cat litter fresh and stale duty pebbles go right in the bottom of the bag and then your sister throws out the used tampons and where do they go...in the same bag and then your brother comes home piss-ass drunk just up trucks pukes right into the bag! Now I'm not trying to be disgusting but that is a realistic situation and what it all comes down to, that's the nasty bag but I rather take that shit out to the garbage than deal with the games that are so hard and painful for my fingers and would wastes my time when I tried to win. Though, luckily, I never played Phillips CD-I games, I only watched the cut-scenes from them on YouTube. And that's when I first thought that it's notorious for its legendary ass-suckage until "Legend Of Zelda: Twilight Princess" came--not from Phillips CD-I but directly from Nintendo and on Game-cube and Wii--though music and graphics are also neat and the controls are pretty smoother for my fingers, but the only thing that bugs me the most is the whole plot...I mean, what did I get when I start played it? I get a shower of 'fuck-you' moments right onto my face and 'Ganon's Puppet Zelda' is the biggest of them all! Well, guest what I response to a 'fuck-you' moment? I simply said 'FUCK YOU!!' while I flip my third, I meant my middle finger. God, as bad as a 'Dancing Emo Peter Parker' in "Spider-Man 3" and every-bit as annoying as Samantha James singing 'Forgiveness' in "Just Friends", the 'Ganon's Puppet Zelda' battle theme is also cringe-worthy and obnoxious...sheer lunacy and torture to my eyes and ears! So I now considered "Twilight Princess", the "Legend Of Zelda" mainstream, as a mixed trash-bag with the bad month, a lot worse than the Phillips CD-I spin-off! Could it be any more un-creative than that? Look, why don't they just add The Scarecrow and The Mad Hatter, and add some bland sparkly slutty vampires and shirt-hating fortune-telling were-wolves and more killer clowns for mind-fucks, and the ghosts of the Joker and the Penguin, as well as the return of Catwoman? They should have just called the game "Batman: Twilight Apocalypse", which is probably what they originally had in mind right after "Batman & Robin" until thought 'No! Wait! Make another Legend-Of-Zelda mainstream game! Because Christopher Nolan and the Rock-Steady Studios already beat us to it! And what about the film directors Burton and Schumacher? Been there! Done that!'...I'm not going to say who's working in Nintendo Game corp. and whose idea it is but it stands for laugh and joke and numb-nuts, which is not really funny, either! They created 'Puppet Zelda', but for what purpose? For male gamers and nerds to jacking themselves off with pleasure while looking at this soft-core porn abomination? (luckily, my brother isn't one of them!) What were they thinking!? I don't believe this! Like, I seriously don't believe this! How could they fuck up one of their own iconic creations this bad? It's not a faithful Zelda game, I wouldn't call it that. They kept saying 'Oh, but it is. It has Zelda in it, it has Link.' carelessly. Look, anyone who watches "Evil Dead" franchise all time don't jack themselves off like retards, not even the demonic rapist trees could spice it up...just simple traditional jump-scares. Yeah, you know what? That's a pointless argument right there. That's like if your dad says 'I fucked your mom' all day! It's like...like I can't argue with that. You may think CD-I is pretty suck, think again! You know, playing "Twilight Princess" is as worthwhile as melting as a dog turd that is Holli Would on a frying pan that is "The Legend Of Zelda" franchise itself. Yeah, put some buffalo puke that is Azula and some cat piss that Azshara all over it, and you have a cold expressionless yet smug-faced shit sandwich that is 'Ganon's Puppet Zelda' existence, which is my fucking nightmare...it's a frustrating incoherent pile of vomit and shit, it's absolutely fucking sucks! Everybody calls it 'Ganon's Puppet Zelda', but call it 'Skanky/Slutty Turncoat White-Faced Prick Zelda', because it looks more like a soft-core back-stabbing seductress as Holli Would from "Cool World" rather than a hard-core horribly-deformed battered possessed victim as Daphne from "Dragon Lair 2"...the character is so heinous that the Nintendo staff made Amanda Waller looked like Mary Poppins! I say again, 'Puppet Zelda' is not cool nor funny nor cute/sexy, it's not even scary, it's just plain stupid, lazy, cheesy and suck-ass! I think I'm gonna apologizing Phillips CD-I officials for saying something rude about their games, right now.", these are her very words I described. While at it "Twilight Princess" makes her feel like she's not really playing the "Legend Of Zelda" video-game at all but rather watching "The Queen Of The Damned"/"Dogma" as another Disney Pixar movie with an unexpected villain since Stinky Pete from "Toy Story 2" as if based on "Warcraft: War Of The Ancients" and "Neon Genesis Evangelion" mixed together with "Mean Girls"/"The Notebook" and produced/directed by Micheal Bay and Tom Green. Do you know how it feels like, to get mind-raped by the very things you didn't expect to see?
She doesn't really care about happen to Midna whatsoever, and she's not a mad-cow-jizz-drinking Luke Skywalker sucker-type of person (like some people including First-4-Figures and Daniel-Link, if possible as she put it) that lost her mind, she's more a bat-credit-card-hating Nostalgia Critic kicker-type that came to her senses. In fact she personally prefer a 'Normal Zelda' only, and she really wanted to support "Twilight Princess" only if 'Puppet Zelda' doesn't exist in first place. Clearly being a 'puppet', a word so ungodly outrageous and insulting that it barely sounded like anything heroic, it rather means that Zelda is certainly sounded more fitting for a non-heroic character that accurately portrayed as a hate-sink...a hate-sink who is sleazy selfish traitorous vain coward who gleefully accepted bribes and willingly sold own country to the evil forces she cheerfully joins just like Queen Azshara (and Zant, respectively) did...a hate-sink who's also an hypocrite that constantly saying that her power 'holy golden light magic' are only deadly to evil when she herself actually using them to personally commit evil deeds instead, against the good folk, the weakest and the most innocent alike...a hate-sink who is a bland yet spineless pussy that is full of shit to the point that she became a sadistic conniving asshole herself, plus Ganondorf is indeed shit (my sister uses a swearing-speech reference from "Team America World Police"). My sister think that 'Puppet Zelda' is the insanely stupidest and laziest idea she had ever seen--as she described as a biggest 'fuck-you' moment (while Midna being the titular Twilight Princess herself is the second biggest)--and she totally against it, and she also said that Nintendo should have thought it earlier for either "Ocarina Of Time" (the fourth game she have beaten) or "A Link To The Past" (her very second game) to confirm this piece of delusional garbage right away so "Twilight Princess" wouldn't have to. Plus it would be also fine to have a 'Puppet Zelda' if only featured in non-canon Phillips CD-I spin-off games since nobody give the damn about them because their concepts and game-plays are so ugly and weirdly twisted that which is accurately perfect for 'Puppet Zelda' as well, way better than in this game. Isn't that so hard? My sister always say that TP!Zelda looks so stupid with yellow eyes and a paled tattooed crook's skin...and boy, she's genuinely right, and one time I did vomit! When I looking at this picture, 'Puppet Zelda' really does look like sleazy hypocritical loser meshed-up of Holli Would, Azula and Azshara--each of all three who is always the embodiment of 'smug snake'/'manipulative bitch in the sheep's clothing' whose 'beauty is bad/evil is sexy' while never as that of 'evil makes you ugly and monstrous' with self-inflicted 'facial/body horror' due to the 'demonic possession' supposedly naturally yet rationally associate with in the "Evil Dead" logical way. the hate-sink kind of princess is more likely full-fledged villain, not a hero nor a damsel-in-distress...yeah, if she is a villain, then any hero (namely Link) in the right mind would have stay away from her because she will play him for a sap every time--just like Holli Would, Azula and Azshara did--this is what very concept 'Puppet Zelda' looked like. Have you ever watched "Dragon's Lair 2" walk-through? It's a good example! Princess Daphne was 'unwillingly' corrupted by dark powers of the Ring of Doom which psychically transformed her into the large warty cannibalistic land-pig version of Ursula the Sea-Witch...rather than altered her from a sexy yet innocent selfless black-clad longer-haired blonde to Holli Would the overly-slutty depraved selfish white-clad shorter-haired blonde. That's how it accurately and rationally works, not like this! Got it?
Yes, my sister seriously, genuinely and utterly despises 'Puppet Zelda' to no end, and she's very frustrated, gotten really sick and tired of seeing 'Puppet Zelda' being only exist "Twilight Princess" related tags and folders from fan-art to fan-fiction and cosplay, and someday that 'Puppet Zelda' will be either permanently adapted out from "Twilight Princess" for good or portrayed as a hideous ghoulish monster who dresses in dirty rags and doesn't need a sword it's got claws and fangs while added into "A Link To The Past" and legitimately considered as one of the 'ugliest chicks in gaming'. To be honest, she pretty likes TP!Zelda as a 'Normal Zelda' a lot better, thank you very much. Of course, both she and I didn't mean to disrespect you or Daniel-Link's art skills, it's just that she can't stand the game's whole plot, and it was all the fault of the Nintendo officials--the very schmucks who should have been ashamed of themselves for what they did to one of their own creations. One more time; 'Normal Zelda' is an embodiment of regal wisdom, beauty and grace that wields 'holy golden light magic', while 'Puppet Zelda' is accurately an embodiment of savage madness, crude ugliness and vulgarity that could wield 'slimy black acid/tar vomit' as it should have been, it supposed to be different between the two forms...okay? This is all my sister's opinion (not my own) and I'm sorry, end of story!
P.S.
Since "Batman The Telltale Series 2: The Enemy Within" came in August 2017, my sister occasionally uses its incarnation of The Riddler (who is hard-core in "Saw" logic which does not need a 'demonic possession' whatsoever, and is more lethal, threatening and intimidating in the rational way than that lame-ass 'Ganon's Puppet Zelda' bullshit) as a stress-reliever to calm herself down, which she does for two years. Heck, even Telltale!Riddler's theme is a whole lot catchier than that godawful 'Ganon's Puppet Zelda' battle theme. That's it, end of story. Take care!
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Well, your sister is definitely entitled to feel that way. And your free to agree with her. And with an older sister of my own, I completely understand wanting to share her views. And I also agree nintendo has made lots of mistakes. But that's part of becoming better: making mistakes. Let me share my view on puppet Zelda, as well as my own older sister's, as well as our history with Zelda. Do with it what you will.
It began with my mom. She got the golden cartridge addition of the original Zelda game. While my dad was deployed, my mom found comfort playing that game late at night after a long day of raising three girls (aged six, three, and 10 months) while she wondered if he was still alive. As I was the three year old, my only memories of that time are going downstairs to say hi to my dad if he had the chance to talk to my mom via a computer cam. Then after, I'd play some of those old original Nintendo console games with her. Since then, those games have meant having strength bigger than you, no matter what it is. And it shows in the story as you play as Link, this literal kid going against the embodiment of evil.
Fast forward to Twilight Princess, and it was a dark time. My dad, home from war, was still haunted by it from PTSD. At that time, he was just realizing what it was. Waking up as a seven year old to hear your dad screaming in fear is heartbreaking. Even more so when you know that person you love, your family isn't what you're seeing. Knowing that amazing, brilliant person you love, has been hurt and disfigured by something so horrible. While I'm glad to say my dad has sought help and is significantly better from it, I see Puppet Zelda in a different light. Zelda is still that wise, elegant person she is, but she's been taken over by something out of her control. She was never originally puppet Zelda. And seeing a shell of someone you care about being tormented in that way, I think, is scarier than a complete monstrous change. Because they are still there, and you can see that...but you know something is gone and not right, and you have no guarantee that will come back.
If you read this far, thanks. Don't usually write long comments. Chances are you might just hit me with a 'I/my sister still hates it! It's f***ing bad!'. You can do that. Just know there are more ways to view it and each person is allowed to view it as they wish, good or bad.
Have a nice day! 😊
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