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Published: 2008-05-04 18:44:10 +0000 UTC; Views: 2135; Favourites: 55; Downloads: 13
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Story Drabble!!!---------
He could still feel the teeth that ripped and the claws that tore even though his body laid slumped against the wall like a marionette with the strings severed. He could still remember what it felt like to have his heart pounding in fear when he and his brothers had been chased down the hallways that were coated with white dust and brown cobwebs. He could still hear the echoes of their voices when he was trapped inside and they out.
It hurt to remain in the room where the only decoration were the half rotten walls, bricks crumbling from age, and one's own body. The sorrow of being unable to help, of being unable to reach out through the window that leaked when it rained... Everything was... getting to be too much. But what was a soul to do? Trapped where limbo does not want, the devil does not see, and where life itself is only an excuse. He couldn't leave the room... no, he had tried that once. It was too dangerous to leave.
But to never leave the room where he had... died in, beside himself... only to have Leonardo and Michelangelo to come in to find his mangled remains... He wanted to hold them so much. To tell them to leave and never come back but Leo kept promising to find a way to place soul into flesh. Mikey... all fur and shell in his new form... The poor child that was once nothing but innocent jokes and jeering pranks. How Raph urned to feel it when the werewolf wrapped around him with sadness and only waited... like a loyal companion that wanted nothing more than to waste away.
Raphael pressed his hand against the glass of the window that was being pelted with gentle rain. From this room he could see the lake that Donatello was in. His poor Donnie... Their poor Donnie... He wanted to be able to slip out of the room and help find away to get him out of that water that churned with spirits and sprites.
But what could a flickering soul do? Where limbo does not want, the devil does not see, and where life itself is only an excuse.
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Comments: 40
ciscoandshadow [2009-10-09 04:15:57 +0000 UTC]
this is really good...
the hand reminds me of Titanic though
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raphfreak121 [2009-06-28 21:37:44 +0000 UTC]
wow! this is really good - reminds me a little bit of Titanic where Jack and Rose are in the carriage and Jack puts his hand on the fogged up window.
But I love how you did this - awesome job
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Cherry-Jamster [2009-05-28 22:24:51 +0000 UTC]
That was really well written. :3
I loved Were-Mikey's reaction to Raph's dead/mangled body. ;w;
Poor Raph. D:
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DarkClosure In reply to GemiDonnie [2009-04-30 04:56:39 +0000 UTC]
I only have the first chapter up on a lj community.
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GemiDonnie In reply to DarkClosure [2009-04-30 05:07:05 +0000 UTC]
Oh, ok. Ehum...could I plase read it? :3
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DarkClosure In reply to GemiDonnie [2009-04-30 05:17:27 +0000 UTC]
You'll have to join the com.
[link]
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Amanda-the-Human [2008-06-14 00:41:17 +0000 UTC]
I love it.... but.... Now like Mikey... I wanna waste away too!!!! ;________; If Raph was killed I'll kill the guy who killed Raph and then bottle the guy's spirits in a bottle and bury the guy in a DEEP hole.
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DarkClosure In reply to Amanda-the-Human [2008-06-14 06:59:26 +0000 UTC]
What causes Raphael's spirit to split from his body is quite more complicated than this drabble can explain. And I must agree that I would want to waste away as well.
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Amanda-the-Human In reply to DarkClosure [2008-06-15 02:06:01 +0000 UTC]
*sits in a dark corner to waste away*
Then Raph needs to go to a prep rally or something
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DarkClosure In reply to Amanda-the-Human [2008-06-15 17:10:14 +0000 UTC]
*chuckles a little* Yeah.
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RaaSet [2008-05-28 12:27:40 +0000 UTC]
When I saw that meme...and there were the panel of a rainy windows with a hand on it...this picture came to my mind...TT TT
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DarkClosure In reply to RaaSet [2008-05-28 14:02:22 +0000 UTC]
Probably because I'm still trying to prefect the window look and right at the moment I can only have them looking good at an angle and with something touching the glass. And that was a complicated way of saying, "It's pretty much the same picture" XD
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DarkSlayer17 [2008-05-07 10:19:59 +0000 UTC]
;w; -sniffles, whimpers and blows nose-
CRUEL!..yet SO good!
You are REALLY starting to give me ideas! haha, ^^U I admit, I uh..sort of did a small drabble fic of my own involving a 'third view' of your idea, I'm so shy too ask this though..um...may I post it?
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DarkClosure In reply to DarkSlayer17 [2008-05-07 23:47:00 +0000 UTC]
Sure! I would love to read it!
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rakiz [2008-05-07 00:17:04 +0000 UTC]
Aww.. I think he could see all around and feel helpless about himself. oh poor Raph. ;_;
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RaaSet [2008-05-06 09:23:43 +0000 UTC]
TT TT
You're...terribly cruel to him recently...and it feels like my damned idea with Leo and Meggy did thihs...since you had that image of Raph dying alone in your mind...heart-melting....TT.TT
His hands...you did too damned good job on the picture and the teaser.
I'm just glad that I recnetly read SpinSPin cause it makes me feel that there is a chance that you won't hurt him forever...T.T
Besides what about Michelyngelo? Can he spek anyway? In this monster form...I have to admit it that I would find it "better" if he couldn't...I can't really explain...
Say..the Ninja Tribunal will die SLOWLY, right? VEEERY slooooowly and painfully....! D<
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DarkClosure In reply to RaaSet [2008-05-08 14:47:01 +0000 UTC]
Mikey won't be able to speak as a werewolf. He'll make normal animal-wolf sounds mixed with natural turtle sounds (churrs, chirps, etc) until a full moon when he'll turn back to his normal self and even then he'll have a hard time speaking. Aa, you'll find out why soon enough.
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DarkClosure In reply to Aku-kun [2008-05-05 04:00:17 +0000 UTC]
Very... and I kind of have second thoughts on actually writing the story.. but it's such a unique and interesting idea that I really do want to write it.
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Aku-kun In reply to DarkClosure [2008-05-05 08:21:49 +0000 UTC]
O____________________O pls write..i really want to read :3
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DarkClosure In reply to Aku-kun [2008-05-05 16:05:42 +0000 UTC]
I will, I just need to finish one of my active stories first.
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RaphsImzadhi [2008-05-04 19:50:33 +0000 UTC]
Is it his hand against a window?
I so wanna read the story!!! When do you think you'll be able to upload the story, at least one or two chapters?
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DarkClosure In reply to RaphsImzadhi [2008-05-05 03:59:33 +0000 UTC]
That is his hand.
Um... once as I'm done with one of my current stories.
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RaphsImzadhi In reply to DarkClosure [2008-05-05 06:50:27 +0000 UTC]
... *scratches head* Well, I should go to finish one of my stories, too. But instead I just started to write another one....Makes four stories again...
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DarkClosure In reply to RaphsImzadhi [2008-05-05 16:03:28 +0000 UTC]
XD You're just as bad as me!
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RaphsImzadhi In reply to DarkClosure [2008-05-05 22:24:04 +0000 UTC]
I think so...
How many stories do you have at the moment? Let's see, there's Spin Spin Sugar, Mercury Mornings, Take My Hand, Paper Flowers and Weight Of The World. The you're in "pre-production" for Mitternacht and- did I forget something?
I have Taboo, My new one called Pure, my "lost" one on FA.net, the story here on DA (do you realize that most of my stories don't have a regular title? Spooky...) and I'm an author of the TMC story here on DA. And then I promised my best friend to continue her story on Obscure Zodiac, because she simply isn't in the place to do that. She gave me the scripts for it, and now I try to translate them...
So I'd say, there's a lot of work for us to do, eh? A creative mind can be like a desease sometimes...
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DarkClosure In reply to RaphsImzadhi [2008-05-10 10:11:59 +0000 UTC]
Stories going on now;
Spin Spin Sugar
Mercury Mornings
Take My Hand
Paper Flowers
Weight Of The World
The Hell of 8 Months
Fatal Theory
My Best Friend
On The Other Side
= 9
Stories that need to be fixed/re-written;
Webbed Glass extra chapters
Poem
Sitting On The Moon
Shimmering Crack
= 4
Total in all = 13
These are not including the short stories that come up into my head at three AM in the morning.
*sighs* I should... really get to work on these things.
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RaphsImzadhi In reply to DarkClosure [2008-05-10 20:05:11 +0000 UTC]
I didn't know the last three ones you're working on. Are they on ff.net? I don't go there, don't know why, but somehow it's not my site.
I forced myself to focus on those stories I named in the last message. Because if I did more, I'll never be able to finish one. With my new job, that takes eight hours daily, and sometimes six days a week....very little time!
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DarkClosure In reply to RaphsImzadhi [2008-05-12 18:56:14 +0000 UTC]
The last listed ones are not posted they are just in the works.
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RaphsImzadhi In reply to DarkClosure [2008-05-12 20:19:01 +0000 UTC]
Okay, now I understand
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Heiros [2008-05-04 18:51:22 +0000 UTC]
So sad and so scary. Makes my heart tremble, but I love it.
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DarkClosure In reply to Heiros [2008-05-05 03:55:53 +0000 UTC]
Man, in the fic they all get it pretty bad... I'm going to have to do a drabble for each of them.
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