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Death-For-One — You're bleeding Thor x Pmsing reader
Published: 2014-01-30 18:03:57 +0000 UTC; Views: 78487; Favourites: 721; Downloads: 0
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         You groaned miserably as you curled into a ball. The covers encasing your body were warm but not warm enough to appease the pulsing pain in your lower torso. You hated your period with a passion it just hurt way too much, especially the first day. The medicine your doctor had given you didn’t work one lick which left you a moaning, groaning lump of pain. Thankfully, for both you and him, Thor was out on a mission and he wouldn’t have to experience your pms rage.

        It took all your willpower to get up from your bed, but the promise of chocolate really helped speed things along.  You lazily shuffled to the bathroom on the opposite side of your room and grabbed a rag. You rubbed your weary eyes as you tossed the rag into the sink and allowed warm to soak it. As soon as every inch had absorbed water you turned off the tap, wrung the rag and hurried it to the kitchen. You hastily threw the wet thing into the microwave and set the timer for one minute. While you waited for the rag to get heated you located your emergency candy stash.

       The moment the microwave beeped you snatched the rag out, but because you weren’t completely classless you waited until you were in the privacy of your room before you slapped it over your ovary area. A pleased sigh left your lips as the heat chased away the pain. Your eyelids fluttered closed in a small state of bliss, but snapped open when the creak of your door filled the room.

“(Name) I have come back early.” Thor declared as he strode into the room.

“Hi honey.” You smiled at your boyfriend. With the sweets and your homemade heating pad you were in a much better mood than before, lucky alien.

“Are you feeling alright?” Thor asked as he peered closely at your face. He sat on the bed beside you and placed his palm against your forehead.

“I’m fine.” You stated while you pushed his hand away from your face however, he didn’t look convinced. 

“Then why are you still in bed?”

“It’s my lazy week.” You shrugged and kicked off the cover so that you could retrieve your phone that had fallen.

“You are bleeding!” Thor shouted and you’re your shoulders sagged. You quickly located your phone and let your legs slid of the bed. With a sigh you stood up and turned to go to the bathroom when you felt a pair of arms wrap around you and pull you back to the bed.

“I shall fetch a healer.” Worry filled his eyes as he smoothed stray hair away from your face.  He sprung from the bed but you latched on to his arm to stop him.

“Why?” You asked with your head cocked to the side. It wasn’t until he looked at you as if you were insane did you realize he had never been around when you were on your period. Thor easily pried your fingers from his upper arm and laid you back unto the bed.

“You will die if you continue to bleed out like that and I was never taught how to heal.” He spoke to you as if you were a child and if it was any other day besides this one you might have grinned at his tone, but it chose one of the worst days possible and it ticked you off just slightly.

“Listen Thor, I’m not a kid I’ve done this like a hundred times already just let me go.”

      Thor looked dumbfounded but allowed you to stand up and speed walk to the bathroom. You kept an emergency set of clothes under the sink so wasted no time in cleaning your skin and changing the bottom portion of your outfit. With your quick movements and the lack of heat the pain in your ovaries shot to life causing you to groan in displeasure. Within a second the bathroom door was slung open, barely missing hitting you in the head, and Thor barged in.

“I am getting a healer.” He announced firmly as he swept you into his arms. You hung your head in annoyance and silently cursed Asgard for their apparent lack of Mother Nature’s wrath while wishing you had been born there.

“Thor I don’t-“ You began but was cut off by his palm over your mouth. His eyes bore into yours never breaking the contact as he swiftly moved to your bed and sat upon the foot of it.

“Are you dying? Have you already seen a healer; is that how you know what to do?” His voice came out hoarse and his eyes began to shine with the makings of unshed tears. Your heart broke in two at the sight of his heartbroken face, so the second his hand uncovered your mouth you flew into a non-descriptive explanation.

“On no, this is completely normal. It happens to all women who aren’t pregnant or too old.”

“Why?”

“It’s our body’s way of telling us we’re not pregnant?” You hoped that would appease him, because it had been awhile since you had learned all the ups and downs of monthly cycle in science. To encourage him not to ask more and the silence was getting a tad awkward you leaned your head to the side and rest it against his chest while you looped your arms around his neck.  The two of you sat in peaceful silence until you broke it with a moan.

“It hurts.” Thor observed. In all honesty he didn’t understand why your body was punishing you for not bearing a child, but he wished he could find a way to make it stop. His arms moved to a position where he was pretty much cradling you, but you didn’t mind because his warmth was pleasant.

“Can we watch TV?”

     You nodded at him and pointed to your bedside table where the remote was sitting. He quickly reached out and snagged it before passing it to you. You silently pressed the appropriate buttons and soon the TV blasted to life portraying a pad commercial. The commercial had just ended when Thor lifted you from his lap and placed you unto the bed.

“Where are you going?” You called to his retreating form.

“To find this Mother Nature woman and demand that she take back her so called gift.”



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Comments: 258

DarkAngelLoki In reply to ??? [2015-01-12 19:51:06 +0000 UTC]

Oh Thor. I wish she'd take it back too, it's a pain! 

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Eve-of-WinterStar In reply to ??? [2014-12-07 17:41:22 +0000 UTC]

oh nice one

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Death-For-One In reply to Eve-of-WinterStar [2014-12-09 22:17:43 +0000 UTC]

Thank you.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Eve-of-WinterStar In reply to Death-For-One [2014-12-10 07:45:06 +0000 UTC]

my pleasure <3

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

nightcrawlerlover99 In reply to ??? [2014-11-05 14:41:05 +0000 UTC]

I'll help you thor. This ain't a gift it's a curse!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

xxNordicFlagsxx In reply to ??? [2014-10-30 06:35:07 +0000 UTC]

Go forth and be successful, mighty Thor. THIS ISNT WHAT I SIGNED UP FOR AS A GIRL.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Germanyfan123321 In reply to xxNordicFlagsxx [2014-11-12 21:17:19 +0000 UTC]

I know right? GO FOR IT THOR!!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Misteria2477 [2014-10-12 19:36:02 +0000 UTC]

Yes Thor do it!!!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

AnimeFreak1D In reply to ??? [2014-09-26 17:02:41 +0000 UTC]

Yes please Thor! Why couldn't the boys have the gift from Mother Nature?!

👍: 0 ⏩: 2

Angel-Child96 In reply to AnimeFreak1D [2014-11-04 05:52:53 +0000 UTC]

There was a birth control for men but it caused them to have cramps, mood swings, and everything else that a women goes through but bleeding, and they stopped producing it saying it was "in humane" what they went through

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

AnimeFreak1D In reply to Angel-Child96 [2014-11-04 23:42:20 +0000 UTC]

Well, then. Women have more balls then men.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Angel-Child96 In reply to AnimeFreak1D [2015-03-03 22:59:12 +0000 UTC]

Our balls got so big they got moved to our chest

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Wolfy7980 In reply to AnimeFreak1D [2014-09-29 07:25:15 +0000 UTC]

Lol

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

x-Chibi-Ninja-Chan-x [2014-09-24 01:47:45 +0000 UTC]

Awwwww He's so sweet!      

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Lilpoeghostie In reply to ??? [2014-09-16 20:48:19 +0000 UTC]

oh Thor I wish it'd be that easy but sadly it's not.

this is one gift you can't give back to mother nature.

XD

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

K4sies In reply to ??? [2014-09-06 23:56:21 +0000 UTC]

Thor you shall find this so called woman who is known as mother nature *nod nod*

That was hilarious! 

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

coolprincess101 In reply to ??? [2014-08-24 22:36:12 +0000 UTC]

You tell Mother Nature Thor!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Ravala In reply to coolprincess101 [2014-08-27 16:15:42 +0000 UTC]

OH YEAH!!!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

DarkRoseStayla1 In reply to ??? [2014-08-19 17:59:19 +0000 UTC]

Oh Thor you're adorable

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

WanderlustStars In reply to ??? [2014-08-16 01:56:35 +0000 UTC]

This is hilarious! *could hardly type because of extreme laughter*

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

SummerCollins In reply to ??? [2014-08-15 18:25:38 +0000 UTC]

Am I the only one here for comfort for a "certain gift"?

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

LordNightmare55 In reply to ??? [2014-07-29 21:46:24 +0000 UTC]

Lol hilarious! But not only chocolate but other sweets is what I crave!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

WhiteLynx57 In reply to ??? [2014-07-29 07:28:47 +0000 UTC]

kdlafj;dilafeo;ajfgdaf *dies laughing* This is better than the Loki version. You're wonderful!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

IceFang1828 In reply to ??? [2014-07-20 02:43:51 +0000 UTC]

Sometimes I wish dudes would mind their own damn business we we are on the monthly cycle... But most don't and end up getting hurt during the week of living hell for women.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Death-For-One In reply to IceFang1828 [2014-07-21 05:55:34 +0000 UTC]

And then they get mad at us.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

IceFang1828 In reply to Death-For-One [2014-07-21 17:04:37 +0000 UTC]

Yeah... Then they regret to cuz we go all HULK-SMASH on them...

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

BlueWolfhanyou In reply to ??? [2014-07-15 15:00:51 +0000 UTC]

Oh Thor....if only it were that easy....

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

AnimeGirl2013 [2014-07-09 15:54:24 +0000 UTC]

looool the mother nature part killed me
oh the fluffiness 

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Belle04TMNT [2014-07-02 01:18:26 +0000 UTC]

*face palm* oh Thor. Why are you so cute yet so clueless.  XS Awesome story. XD

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Death-For-One In reply to Belle04TMNT [2014-07-02 03:22:19 +0000 UTC]

Thank you.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Belle04TMNT In reply to Death-For-One [2014-07-02 05:10:10 +0000 UTC]

You're welcome. XD

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Femdenmark92 In reply to ??? [2014-06-20 04:30:44 +0000 UTC]

lol aww Thor
Just picture yourself feeling really ticked off because of world shortage of pop tarts
Add some hulk action
And that's what we go through for a week
Natasha: *nods*
Thor: now I get it

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

crimsonblackrose1 [2014-06-11 03:34:14 +0000 UTC]

LOL!!! Sweet ending!!!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Death-For-One In reply to crimsonblackrose1 [2014-06-11 03:42:41 +0000 UTC]

Glad you liked it.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

DB4Lyfe [2014-06-09 03:17:27 +0000 UTC]

We need a sequel to this of Reader-chan trying to stop Thor from finding "Mother Nature".

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Death-For-One In reply to DB4Lyfe [2014-06-10 20:33:07 +0000 UTC]

I will see what I can do, to make it happen.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

LocketAngel [2014-05-26 03:01:01 +0000 UTC]

Oh my god I'm dying at that last line. I'm just picturing him going up to the woman who portrayed Mother Nature in those commercials and being like. "Mother Nature, why have you bestowed such agony upon the one I love. What has she done to deserve your misfortune." And the actress is all fish mouth. "Take back your so called gift or You will force my hand." And his Hammer appears and she yells "I'm just an actress!" Before sitting him down and explaining periods and pads and commercials and what he can do to help, then he just bursts in with a teddy bear and a giant box of fancy chocolate and disney movies and stuff and says. "My darling, I'm afraid I could not find the real woman, but the actress was very helpful. I have brought you the medicine you require!" 

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Death-For-One In reply to LocketAngel [2014-05-26 03:55:58 +0000 UTC]

That is so funny!!! I'm pretty sure you killed me cause I had to try and keep in my laughter so I would wake up my family, but it was worth it. 

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

LocketAngel In reply to Death-For-One [2014-05-28 00:17:41 +0000 UTC]

I am glad I amused you so

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

ScarletPotter In reply to ??? [2014-05-24 06:55:09 +0000 UTC]

lol

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Mad-Monkey-Queen In reply to ??? [2014-05-23 03:30:35 +0000 UTC]

PMsing rage!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

lmhfantasy In reply to ??? [2014-05-08 02:11:43 +0000 UTC]

I hear they get worse as you get older. I'm 23 now. I don't even wanna think about how bad it'll be when I'm old enough to start going through menopause.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

225cdl In reply to ??? [2014-04-28 01:55:30 +0000 UTC]

XD Y DID MN CURSE US

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Death-For-One In reply to 225cdl [2014-04-28 01:57:18 +0000 UTC]

Cause she's cruel

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

225cdl In reply to Death-For-One [2014-04-28 23:30:58 +0000 UTC]

XD that she is

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

FoxGirlFun In reply to ??? [2014-04-26 17:30:22 +0000 UTC]

I agree with Thor about Mother Nature

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Death-For-One In reply to FoxGirlFun [2014-04-27 02:06:05 +0000 UTC]

I believe every single female in the world does.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

FoxGirlFun In reply to Death-For-One [2014-04-27 03:04:08 +0000 UTC]

Agreed

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

melodymalone123 In reply to ??? [2014-04-21 11:33:31 +0000 UTC]

PMS jokes are not funny.
Period.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Whovian13423 In reply to melodymalone123 [2014-05-07 21:27:51 +0000 UTC]

I see what you did there

👍: 0 ⏩: 1


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