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Chapter 16 - A Question of Culture
The slightly quarian padded softly after the towering krogan as he led her to across the house, all the way to the second room that she hadn't dared enter. Now that Torr was beside her she felt no sense of intrusion. Instead the quarian found herself growing increasingly curious. The storage room she'd just been in had been something of an adventurous for her and Tali couldn't help but let her imagination wander. What hidden treasures might Torr be hiding behind these doors? And why was he so intent on showing them to her? She imagined wild things, a cache of long-forgotten krogan technology, accumulated throughout the ages, a speeder bike that Torr had been working on privately for years and now required her expertise with. Tali could almost feel her head swelling at that last prideful thought.

Torr's frame almost hid the entirety of the doorway from view and it was only after numerous pass codes, gene locks and still other security conditions were met that the door slowly slid open with a gentle brushing of metal on metal. The elaborate security set up only fed Tali's anticipation and it was something of a relief when she could finally take a look at the contents of the room itself. The first thing Tali noticed as Torr stepped aside was the sheer thickness of the actual door. It was at least twice as thick as any equivalents she'd ever seen. The second thing she noticed was how rapidly her jaw hit the base of her helmet.

The room was lined from floor to roof with what had to be hundreds of books, all stacked one against the other as though they were a wall unto themselves. A tentative, disbelieving step drew Tali into the room, her eyes fixed on the impossible sight before her. There were occasional gaps and a few empty shelves scattered here and there but the sheer vibrancy of the collection was staggering. The spines of the various volumes were completely unpredictable, with fantastically coloured and elegantly fonted tales placed freely next to the duller, darker styles of older works.

Torr pulled the door shut behind them as a solitary lock re-engaged itself with a soft bleep of confirmation. Tali thought she detected a glimmer of both amusement and pride in the old man's golden eyes as he sank gratefully into a solitary chair that occupied the centre of the room, the only concession to furnishings that existed within the treasure trove they now occupied. Tali hadn't even registered its presence, her amazement with Torr's hidden library commanding the entirety of her attention. As her head caught up with her sudden excitement the quarian began to study the books in greater detail, slowly coming to realise that the collection didn't belong to any one race; indeed, Torr had taken the time to organise the placement of the books into sections divided by race and then listed them alphabetically by order of authors.

As her eyes ran over the scores of books Tali began to recognize some of the author's names. Rules of combat and dissertations on stratagem, written by famed turian military minds from ages past, lined that race's shelves. The salarian books consisted mostly of the works of notable playwrights such as Qilon and Jamai, together with the concise thoughts of the species' most respected philosophers. Classical asari fictions lined their shelves, grand sweeping novels that drew upon centuries of experience in a way that often left non-asari readers both bewildered and entranced.

A few batarian chronicles on wars and slavery rights dotted the shelves above the equally small selection of elcor works, the latter's ponderous habits resulting in surprisingly few completed works. On the corner bookcase a band of scattered documents hinted at the volus' closely guarded mercantile arts and the majority of the hanar works related to their beloved enkindlers, though a surprising amount of poetry also resided in the same space.

The engineer was surprised to see a number of human titles placed amongst the volumes, wondering at the fact that such a galactically young race had already spread their works across the vast chasm of space. The books in their section seemed as diverse as her pre-Pilgrimage training had claimed their race to be, with elaborately written plays sharing the space with classical works of fiction, historical chronicles and thick religious and philosophical texts. She recognized the name Confucius amongst them, recalling that many of the practical minded turians had become followers of the ancient, practical teachings in recent years.

Even a few krogan books lined the shelves, lauded for their rarity not just for their existence in a paperless society, but also because very few krogans had the patience or will to write anything beyond the briefest of battle reports. There were no vorcha works to be seen, a fact that she found utterly unsurprising.

As Tali's eyes fell upon the uppermost batch of shelves she suddenly felt her heart catch in her throat. The immediately recognizable lines of ancient kellish script were etched into the spines of three small books, their soft curves glistening in the sombre mood lighting that wrapped the room in a comforting embrace. The triumlative of books were bound in a thick, fabric-like material that she didn't recognize. It was earthen in colour, the muted shades of the natural greens providing a warm contrast to the stony grey of the faded lettering.

Torr, up until now content to watch and measure the quarian's reaction, spoke with a quiet respect, knowing well what the presence of those books would mean to his guest. "I've only dared handle them twice since they came into my possession. They're very fragile and so old that they likely came from one of your worlds before the geth revolt happened."

Tali struggled to formulate a response. "Those...they can't possibly be real..." Merely breathing in the general direction of the wall of volumes sent a nervous shiver through her, despite being very much aware that what little traces of her breath escaped her suit were uncommonly sterile. She swung her gaze on the krogan, slowly recalling his words on the way back from Avo Nid's and unable to keep the hint of accusation from her voice. "How did you get them?"
Torr gestured for her to take a seat. "It was during my days as a merc, we were hired to board and secure a cruise liner. The guy who was paying the bills had some kinda grudge against one of the posh fellas on board, wanted us to take the bridge and bring the whole ship to a halt while he personally beat the crap outta this feeble old man."

He nodded at Tali's uncomfortable poise. "I didn't much like it either, far as Krovak Torr was concerned what he was doing was weak, there was no respect in it. So, as the screams from the beating dragged on I wandered about the room, making a show of checking for concealed firearms, emergency comm beacons, that kinda thing. Anyways as I'm prowling around I see these funny lookin' books with lettering I don't recognize sitting in this glass case. So I figure they might be worth something and try and lift the casing off, only the guy's put a security DNA lock on it hasn't he?" A faint smile lit the old krogan's face. "Thing is, he didn't account for a krogan's brute strength. I just put my fist straight through the glass and as the alarms started shrieking at me, I lifted them books free and stuck 'em in my belt. The guy who hired me was screaming obscenities at this point, tellin' me I was a big dumb brute and that those books belonged to him now."

A deep rumble that Tali had come to recognize as a chuckle billowed up from Torr. "I told him the way I saw it, he was getting what he wanted and he shoulda known that part of any merc's contract is a right to unclaimed spoils. It wasn't of course, but was smart enough not to argue the point with a ten foot tall krogan in his battle prime."
Tali felt an amused smile pull at the corners of her mouth.
"Them books have been with me ever since, though I was smart enough to decide not to sell 'em on unless I got desperate for cash." He huffed. "Turns out I never did."
"And you've kept them here since then?" Tali was incredulous. "I'm amazed a room like this could even exist outside of a museum, much less on Omega. These books have to be worth millions when you total them up, how in Keelah's name have you kept them safe?"
He held up a placating hand in response. "Everything you see here has been acquired over decades of galaxy wandering and hidden in carefully disguised stashes across dozens of worlds. It's only been in the last few years since I decided to take up residence here that I brought them all back with me where I could watch over them, read from them...learn from them. Now Omega might not be the safest place to keep items of value but ol' Krovak Torr was very meticulous about his security when he bought this place." Reptilian eyes twinkled. "And you'd be surprised how many people will go out of their way to avoid a 10 foot tall krogan once he settles into the neighbourhood."

Tali simply shook her head in wonderment and sank down to sit on the cold surface of the floor. From down here Torr's physique looked even more impressive, his sinewy muscles rippling as he shifted into a more comfortable position in his thickly cushioned chair. He's an incredibly odd character. Tali realised and momentarily her desire to have him explain his actions was overrun by a need to learn more about him.

"What made you collect all these books?" She ventured hesitantly.
Torr's long pause and heavy intake of breath told her the answer was going to be a long winded one. "Ever since I was a whelp, I've always had an interest in the past. I was constantly on the heels of the Shaman as a boy, striving to learn all I could about our clan; battle history, great warriors, our fiercest enemies, who to hate and who to respect. I annoyed the hell outta him for the first few years, but by the time I was of age to take the rite I think the old man had developed a respect for me. When I got back from facing the wilderness of Tuchanka alone he told me that he wanted me to be trained in the ways of the Shaman, to be his replacement when he perished. It wasn't something I'd ever considered, all I wanted to do was fight in the name of Krovak Horad, just like the rest of our kind. But the more I thought about it the more sense it made and I started to get to likin' the idea. Even knowing what you had to go through to become a Shaman didn't put me off."

When Tali shot him a questioning glance, the old krogan shook his head. "Trust me kid, you don't want to know. Anyway, it didn't matter too much in the end. Centuries later, right around the time the old guy came close to dying a rival clan fell upon us in the midst of one of Tuchanka's biggest dust storms. The Krovak clan was obliterated in one fell swoop and the young upstart who masterminded it all brought clan Urdnot to glory on the wave of our defeat." Torr's face was impassive and Tali suspected he'd long since come to terms with the loss of his clan. "I was the only one to survive, badly wounded and lost in the storm. I managed to find shelter and spent a few days hunting pyjaks for food before I'd healed up enough to find my way to a port, a ship, and into the stars. I guess over time my interest in the clan's history developed into a desire to know more about the people we were fighting against."

Tali had the sneaking suspicion that Torr's interests had made him the target of much ridicule over the years from his krogan counterparts, everything she'd learnt about his kind in the days before she'd begun her Va'Seras told her that krogans cared little for the ways of other races; all too often the only thing that mattered to them was how well their opponents could acquit themselves in a fight. Not wanting to remind Torr of any misery he'd been subjected to, the shrewd quarian kept the thought to herself. Instead, as the silence grew stronger, she gave voice to the question she'd originally come to have answered.

"Torr, I have to know. I have to hear it from your lips." She sucked in her breath, steadying herself before her words burst from her mouth like atmosphere through a hull breach. "What you did to the turian last night... was all that violence really necessary?" She hesitated, unwilling to give voice to the phantom from her nightmares. "Di-did he really deserve it?"

Torr was silent for a time and when he did speak it was with such conviction that it immediately unnerved the quarian. "Did he deserve it?" He echoed. "Was the violence necessary? It got us the information we wanted didn't it? It might have seemed brutal to you Tali but could you have come up with a better way to make him talk in the timeframe we had?" He ploughed on without waiting for an answer.

"I'm violent because it's in my nature kid, it's who I am, it's who I was born to be. War and blood and pain and death are all the krogan live for. It's all we are and it's all we'll ever be." His angry rant abruptly subsided and a sobering silence filled the room before he spoke again. "Krovak Torr tried to change that once. He failed." His gaze switched back to Tali who almost flinched at the intensity in his eyes. "And now he lives as a proper krogan should, on a station where a fight can always be found, in a system that has the highest death rate in the known galaxy, where his life trickles slowly by while he waits for the one who can finally grant him the glorious battle death every krogan demands."

Again, the old warrior's words died away and Tali could think of nothing to say to break the pregnant silence between them. The bitterness with which he'd spoken had sent a shiver down her spine and made her all the more reluctant to broach the subject again. Evidently Torr's feelings about his race's attitude were deep seated. Eventually he spoke again in a much calmer, more resigned tone.

"So to answer your question Tali, I was violent with him because I'm a krogan and because here, strength and a willingness to be viciously brutal are all that is respected. What I did to him was the fastest way to get him to talk; it was a means to an end, and the end proved it justified the means."
"There are still limits Torr." Tali replied quietly, loath to speak but steadfast in her belief that no living being deserved to have been treated so harshly.
"Not for a krogan." He pointed out, the gentle shake of his head cementing the subtle rebuke.
"You really think that little of your own people?" She ventured, unsure of what he was insinuating.
"Take a look around this room kid," he replied with a wave of his hand, "just one glance will fill your eyes with dozens of cultural classics from across the galaxy. Ancient plays and philosophical texts, grandiose novels and detailed chronicles of galactic history. All these books, all these cultural statements and not one of them written by a krogan hand." Before she could stop herself Tali's eyes flickered uncertainly over the small scattering of krogan volumes and Torr immediately spotted the movement even through her visor.

"Ah yes, the sum of my people's contributions to literature. And what are they? The brash boastings of a long dead warlord, the retelling of the Battle of Kur, site of Shiagur's greatest victory." He shook his head in bitter annoyance. "Nothing but war and bloodshed. That is all my kind have to offer this galaxy and it's all we've ever known. Tell me Tali, what kind of culture is that? When you hold up the cultural achievements of my kind against the beautiful splendor of the asari or the scientific advancement of the salarians, what justification have we in being called a cultured race?"

"Every sentient species in this galaxy has grown and matured throughout the millennia, as a race they have gotten older and wiser, learning what practices lead to self destruction and putting them aside. They've become a people worthy of respect. Meanwhile the krogan have been simply beating the hell out of each other since the void first spat them out." Torr sank back into his chair and glowered in disgust at the hardened floor. "It frustrates me to no end, seeing what we truly are, but there's nothing Krovak Torr can do to change it. No self-respecting krogan is gonna listen to a lecture from a has-been." His eyes abruptly tracked up to Tali as if he just remembered she was still there. "It might aggravate me Tali, knowing what our people are, but ultimately I'm not going to apologize for being what I am."

Tali suddenly got the sense that she was finally seeing the real side of Krovak Torr for the first time and she wasn't sure she agreed with his view of himself. Before she allowed caution to get the best of her the quarian moved to set him straight. "If that's all you think the krogan are capable of, why are you helping Ren and me? Why did you help Rikka and all the others so long ago?" Riding on a wave of sudden confidence, the engineer pushed on before he could respond.

"Whatever you might think of the rest of your kind you're more than them Torr. What you've done for us while we've been here has already proven that. Would any other krogan open his house to strangers? Guide them through a station that would surely have chewed them up and spat them out in any other circumstance? Damn it Torr you were willing to take bullets for us last night!" Tali caught herself, abruptly aware of how self-righteous she sounded. She brought her voice back under control before continuing. "Even if you refuse to see it, you're better than you think you are.

The old krogan was looking at her in silence, his face an unreadable mask. As time seemed to stretch after her outburst, Tali began to feel increasingly unnerved. Have I said too much? Did I cross the line? Her fears were allayed when Torr exhaled a heavy sigh of resignation. "I think it's too late for me kid, ol' Krovak Torr's been set in his ways too long to change them now."

Tali shook her head, unsure if she felt disgusted with his attitude or just his unwillingness to see what, to her at least, was plainly in front of their faces.
"I can't make you change your mind Torr, we both know you're better than you're making yousrelf out to be, you're just refusing to see it."
"I'm not asking you to help me Tali'Zorah." The rebuke was there, however disguised and Tali suspected the krogan was coming to the end of his patience for the current topic. Perhaps childishly, she refused to allow him the last word on the matter.
"That's true, you aren't. As a matter of fact you're being foolish and stubborn. But when you act as though you care about someone, expect to see the favour returned."

Tali moved for the door, aware of Torr's stubborn eyes tracking her movements. She turned back to face him a final time, fingers hovering over the door key. "Don't ask me to be your guest and live in your house without some kind of recompense."
The door slid open with a soft whooshing, the security features putting up no fight from this side.
"The fleet was family to me once, and they will be again but for now I've only got you and Ren left."
She squared her shoulders and stepped through the door, her final words barely audible as it slid shut leaving the krogan behind her.

"Where I come from, family looks after each other."