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Deoxyribonucleic — Warhammer in a nutshell
Published: 2010-04-07 22:35:08 +0000 UTC; Views: 34330; Favourites: 534; Downloads: 394
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Description
Mood: buh?Listening to: Kata Tsubasa no Tori - Shikata Akiko
Watching: -
Playing: -
So I got introduced to this nerdfest a little while ago called 'Warhammer 40k'. I'd heard about it here and there since my childhood, but didn't pay much attention to it. All I remember was some big tank thing with green ugly freaks all over it looking mighty angry and enthusiastic all at once.
Now that I have some friends who are into this collectibles thing, I finally understand a bit more about what's going on. Myself, I hate collectibles. The videogames were fun though.
So, this art is for my interpretation of what the entire Warhammer series seems like. Nice satire on international politics and religion if you ask me.
Inspired by that deranged chibi picture of WWII propaganda.
edit: @(*&# FULLSIZE FIXED
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Comments: 131
Moral of the fable? TAUS... ARE... FUCKING... GAY... >:v
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The eldar and tau are particularly funny.
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The Chaos Marine be more like "BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!!!"
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There is no "good" group in Warhammer 40k. But the Tau seem to be the closest thing to it.
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madness pure unrestrained madness that is warhammer for you
everything shoots, eats, hacks, chops, melts and stomps everything else
unless your tau then you ask if they are friendly THEN YOU KILL IT
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you did forget one thing...the dark eldar.
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This sums them up: 1d4chan.org/wiki/File:12876922…
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Oy....but true....its a big plot hole puns galore.
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We don't talk about the dar eldar(clinches but cheeks)
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Oh but wait...the Dark Eldar are the least problematic. There are two...other factions...one that has a preference for Virus bombing, and the creepy Cyber Ghouls....that make all the others except maybe Chaos look like Saints!
Ha ha....if you clench but cheeks...you forget about the root canal torture device!
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That meant to say butt* cheeks...also we cyber ghouls have been gaining sentience and well other shit we are still power hungry for souls and not dying when shot at.
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The Cyber Ghouls are the terrifying Rak'gol...in DoW40K universe.
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Yup, this is Warhammer 40k. Fractions marching against each other shouting their own warcries and other BS and killing everithing around them.
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lol, dark eldar arn't even there, there always hiding.
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Tau, the only good guys in the warhammer 40k universe.
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You mean the guys that engage in ethnic cleansing, practical slavery, treat everyone as second class citizens (if they don't kill them), and sterilize any humans they 'welcome'?
Only "good" guys are the IOM, specifically factions such as the Salamanders, Ultramarines Empire, or non-Hive Worlds.
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No, really, comparatively, the Tau are much better, if a bit naive. They are the only faction that is not racist, overly religious, technology backwards, and are MASSIVELY AGAINST SLAVERY. They only sterilize humans that rebel after a war. compare that with the Imperium sterilizing Entire sectors over rumors. The ethnic cleansing only happens in cities where the humans attempt to revolt. The Imperium perform ethnic cleansing whenever it's bored.
The Tau lets you live even though you say you hate it. The Imperium will execute you and your friends and family if you so much as sneeze.
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Actually the Imperium is fairly chill by modern standards. They don't care about racism, homosexuals, or even most mutants. The Imperium only has a problem if you have more than four limbs or two eyes and/or start worshiping Chaos Gods- which could threaten the survival of the entire sector of space if you manage to open a warp portal.
The Tau don't have to deal with the threat of somebody simply thinking angry thoughts and suddenly turning into a bloodletter.
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*sighs*
The Tau were outright made to be the good guys, they were, as much as I hate to say it, a cashgrab to attract Otaku into the fandom, hence their designs and their goodness.
And you know what? I fucking love them.
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Commissar: DRIVE ME CLOSER! I WANT TO HIT THEM WITH MY SWORD!!!
Space Marine: THE FALLEN SHALL BE FOREVER REMEMBERED AS THE EMPERORS LOSERS!
Adeptus Sororitas: I'M ON MY PERIOOOOOOOD!!!!!!!!!!!
Chaos Marine: MILK FOR THE KHORNE FLAKES!!!!!!!!
Ork: ON THE FIRST DAY OF WAAGHMAS, MY WARBOSS GA E TO ME.........
Tyranid: FEEED! CONSUUUUME! DEVOOOUR!!!!!!
Necron: Matt ward nerfed me.
Eldar: My dead kin are over NINE THOUSAAAAAAAND!!!!!!!!!
Tau: (Sings Smurf theme song) La la, la la la la, For the greater good!!!!!!!
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Firewarrior : Hello little squirrel ! You want to join the Greater good ? ^^
Squirrel : CHIP CHIP !
Firewarrior : THEN DIE, BARBARIAN ! !0:> *pew pew*
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You DON'T wanna know.
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lmao, that makes sense XD
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These are REALLY incredible. What a great take on the classic Warahammer theme. Easternised!
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Nice job! I would say that you hit the nail on the head perfectly with this. Also, this why I like the Tau some much.
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ohhhhh You cant simply put warhammer into a nutshell, maybe a bullet shell or a bomb casing but not a nutshell
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pfft i bet that Tau would be screamin' as loud as the rest of 'em. don't let their peaceful demeanor fool you. they're idealists, sure, but FAR from mellow. they're like the Imperium, but going the other way.
i can much more understand the Eldar not screaming anything because they're more subtle than that.
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FOR THE GREATER GOOD!
And the Eldar is probably mindf-ing everyone else in the picture yelling at them to shut up
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exactly, no matter the modes of operations of communications everyone in 40k has a strong voice for their opinions
it doesn't pay not having a strong stance in the 41st millennium
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Ironically, don't harlequins supposedly fight in silence? Or am I mixing it up with something else?
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Hmmm, you forget the part where the Tau put a headset on the squirll to communicate with it and tell it it should join the great Tau empire for the greater good.
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That's better than the Space Marines, who'd shoot it just because it isn't constantly spouting words of praise about the Emperor >.>
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No, they'd just shoot it because it's a talking Squirll. Clearly either a mutant or a Xenos, neither is good. That approach goes for practically any Imperial Army (Inquisitors might want to research it first).
Then again the eldar might shoot it because they have forseen that the squirll will drop a nut on one of them 2 years from now.
The orks will just smash it because they can.
Chaos Marines will try to corrupt it, or kill it if that fails.
Necrons will likely kill it out of spite.
and Dark Eldar will not kill it, but torture it for all the soul engergy it is worth.
The 40K universe is not a good place to be a talking squirll.
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yeah we're like that until hive fleet gorgon shows up again
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