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devotedwritter93 — I Surrender [NSFW]
Published: 2011-12-01 16:22:54 +0000 UTC; Views: 396; Favourites: 10; Downloads: 0
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Description Mesmerized
I watch….

Life is slipping awy

Pouring through my handmade cracks

Painting my skin a DANGEROUS red…

Drip
Drip
Drip

Into the water….

My world's    S P I N N I N G  now

Distant voices are near…

I'm slipping FURTHER
Further
    f u r t h e r . . .

I surrender my life to YOU!
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Comments: 7

ThousandMaster-Nagi [2012-02-15 19:38:01 +0000 UTC]

yes! the arrangement is FANTASTIC!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

intricately-ordinary [2012-01-13 05:12:54 +0000 UTC]

oh dear... if this is "mature" then perhaps I ought to change the ratings on a few of my poems...

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

devotedwritter93 In reply to intricately-ordinary [2012-01-13 16:43:58 +0000 UTC]

haha I just didn't want anyone to complain if they thought it should have been rated as mature

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

intricately-ordinary In reply to devotedwritter93 [2012-01-13 23:50:12 +0000 UTC]

oh no... has that happened before??

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

maeghanwatson [2011-12-04 04:37:00 +0000 UTC]

Nice desciption of everything! Great job!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

HourglassOfLostTime [2011-12-04 02:37:51 +0000 UTC]

I enjoyed the visual effects of the poem. Splendedly done.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Personsen [2011-12-01 19:48:32 +0000 UTC]

Meep???

👍: 0 ⏩: 0