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devotedwritter93 — Last Goodbye
Published: 2013-08-04 05:17:17 +0000 UTC; Views: 652; Favourites: 2; Downloads: 0
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Description I can hear deaths sweet call, wrapping its sharp claws around my broken heart. The temptation to cross the line and walk in the shadow of death once more is unbearably strong. So I close my eyes and take a step but something stops me. I'm unable to move, though I keep trying to take the final steps towards death.

For the first time I notice the warmth of something wrapped around me, holding me in place. I turn to a face that's filled with love. My eyes find yours and fill with tears as I realize that love is meant for me. I try to pull away, to hide my love in fear of causing you pain, or of me being hurt once more…but you won't let go. You hold me tightly, willing me to stay. Hoping for my trust, but I won’t give in. I keep trying to leave, desperate now.  I turn around " Please, let go," I cry hysterically trying to pull away. "PLEASE!"

I'm begging now, trying as hard as I can not to look into your eyes. I know if I do, I'll give in. I won’t let myself. No, not this time. I can't stand to feel the pain that could come from it, so I continue to fight. Then I hear you say the 3 words I've longed to hear my whole life said the exact way you spoke them. " I Love You."

It's then that I know it's no use fighting and I stop. All is quiet. I fall to my knees letting the tears get the best of me. You wrap me in your arms protecting me from the world outside

The feel of your arms around me is enough to stop my trembling, but deep inside I wonder if it's enough to stop the hidden pain I always carry with me. It may be enough to make it subside for the time being, but to make it vanish forever would be practically impossible.
The pain I carry with me will be a constant barrier between us, so to let this go on would be improbable, impossible even. It would be best for me to let you go, for your own protection then to keep you mixed up in this irrational relationship, but I don't have the strength to let you go. To let you go would take everything I have, all the strength I use to keep the pain at bay. So I stay in the protection of your arms and pray with all my heart that this will be enough to keep me safe, to protect me from the pain that constantly threatens my sanity.

I closed my eyes as he spoke the words I'd longed to hear just once in my life. With my back turned towards him I let the tears slide down my cheeks. I took just a moment to close my eyes and think about the life we could have, the love we could share, and the memories we could make. If only, life had worked out differently. If only, They hadn't hurt me so bad. If only, They weren't after me.  If only, They couldn't hurt him...No. If only, I couldn't hurt him. It was beautiful, the life I imagined.

But, as I opened my eyes, I could see the shadows surrounding us. The light within him diminishing. It was at that moment I knew the life I had imagined could never be, and I knew what I had to do. I turned to face him, and looked into his tired eyes. I knew that tiredness was from me, from the burdens he helped me carry. I knew my time was up.

I let the tears fall freely now, not even attempting to hide them. Knowing I couldn't. "I know..." I say with a sad smile. I reach up and wipe away the tears as they begin to fall, before I turn and run into the darkness, where I know you can't follow. I could feel the sobs tear through my body as I run, reminding myself that this is for the best, that this protects you. I remind myself that I'm doing this because I love you. With that thought, I find the strength to keep fighting, and I find the will to live.
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Comments: 4

5MinSketcher [2019-07-25 17:26:46 +0000 UTC]

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

xXVegasGirlXx [2014-07-30 17:25:22 +0000 UTC]

I wish i could favorite this a million times over.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

kitteneyes207 [2013-08-04 05:22:48 +0000 UTC]

That was amazing.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

devotedwritter93 In reply to kitteneyes207 [2013-08-04 18:33:41 +0000 UTC]

Thank you Really means alot.

👍: 1 ⏩: 0