HOME | DD
DisturbedEntity — One Shot
Published: 2004-03-09 23:18:54 +0000 UTC; Views: 160; Favourites: 0; Downloads: 30
Redirect to original
Description
One shot is all I need.Related content
Comments: 6
There are a few typoes I could point out, but I'm sure you realize that they're there.
dad is over the edge
the family is consumed with dad
This would be a little repetitious in an relatively un-repetitive poem.
pain? i already hurt
Good focus on the comfort the subject's thinking.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Yeah, fucking typos, I never notice them until I've close dPhotoshop and am too lazy to open it all again, lol.
"pain? i already hurt
Good focus on the comfort the subject's thinking."
I'm not quite sure what you meant there, but it sounds good.. So thanks 
Shit, I wrote this poem some time ago... Things have changed a lot
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Ta for the fave. Thanks for caring too. Nice to know people care.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1