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EvolutionsVoid — Knights of the Wrong Table

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Published: 2023-03-15 22:32:33 +0000 UTC; Views: 9261; Favourites: 63; Downloads: 0
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Description

Most folk don't know much of the "Knights of the Wrong Table," or really what that name even means. An order with such a title feels like you would hear about them in legend or tale, but most who hear the name would just respond with a shrug. Even those who do know the name only learned it from the posters that keep showing up on posts and community boards all across the kingdoms (despite everyone tearing them down pretty frequently). What these obnoxious scraps of paper speak of is an order of knights that are eager to serve anyone who needs a helping hand or a protective blade. For those in need that have nowhere else to turn, seek the Knights of the Wrong Table, as they believe in helping the downtrodden and ignored.


Any who would take such claims seriously can follow the instructions on the posters to find their headquarters. Just head out of town, like WAY out of town, then follow the back roads, go past a couple of fields, keep going even though the road stops existing and then you are there! Those who find this pretty secluded spot shall gaze upon their headquarters then immediately start rethinking their choices, because it is pretty much just a barn. Its got some extensions crudely slapped on and looks like it could collapse at any minute, but that is indeed home of the Knights of the Wrong Table. Here you will find a warm and helpful order of knights ready to be hired to help you any way they can (wait, wouldn't they be mercenaries then? Well, no they are pretty adamant on being called knights). Their services come quite cheap, as the entire point of their order is to help those who have no other options. Honestly, they wind up doing a lot of stuff for free, just because they can't stand to turn away those in need (though one or two members cause quite a racket when they do this). They are here to bring justice, spread peace, defeat evil and generally lend a hand even if the task to rid someone's garden of gophers. If asked why, they would simply say that it is what knights do! However, it doesn't take much digging for one to realize that this odd band of creatures are definitely not knights.


In truth, the Knights of the Wrong Table is a cobbled together group of folk who simply want to help people and also need a place to stay. There is no ceremony or real requirements for joining, all they ask is for you to fill out a form and have the desire to lend a hand. The group was originally started by Vikus and Osryx, a slime and demon who dreamed of becoming knights and bringing hope to those who need it. However, the duo wound up just getting run out of every town they walked into, and no king would even let them past the main gates. So thus they decided to start their own order, one that would turn no one away. If there were those who sought peace and justice, then they would be welcomed with open arms to their group. While they hoped to see great warriors and nobles join their cause, they wound up getting other strays, wanderers, misfits and folk who generally had nowhere else to go. Every member was brought in with pride, and that cobbled order is what stands as the Knights of the Wrong Table today. The name was made a bit later after their formation, as it was what most detractors called them whenever they showed up looking for work. They decided to take the name as their own, wear it as a badge of honor and show the world what they could do. Unfortunately, the name is still pretty much used like an insult to them but they invested too much in advertising and posters to change it. This encapsulates the slight issues the order has been dealing with since their conception, which is no one really wants their help and a lot of folk don't trust them. A strange band of monsters like them raise a lot of eyebrows, and people assume they have some nefarious purpose. The knights just want to be helpful, but such efforts often meet a lot of resistance. Not to mention that the very knights they aspire to be tend to see them as beasts to be slain, and the order is slowly finding that the shining armor is a lot dirtier then legends tell.


Even with detractors and barely any customers, the Knights of the Wrong Table continue their efforts in any way they can. Even if it means showing up to problems they weren't invited to! They will keep working, fighting, advertising and whatever to keep their dream alive. Even if no one hires them, at least they have their strange group to call family and their rickety barn to call home.  


The members of the Knights of the Wrong Table (no real order, you will get it through context):


Osryx Stalvos - A demon born in the Underworld, Osryx always valued those who brought peace, justice and hope. Inspired by his mom, he wanted to be like her and become a helping hero to others, which is why he set his sights on the surface world. The Underworld was in a time of general peace now, so there wasn't much inspiring stuff to be done down there. However, the Underworld and surface world have been at odds for centuries, with neither side trusting the other. Osryx saw this conflict as a challenge for him to overcome and vowed to go to the surface to help bring the two worlds closer together. If a demon could go up there and show the surface what good they could do, then surely these tensions would slowly melt away. Set in his decision (to the dismay of his parents), Osryx ascended to the surface world to start his mission of peace. Sadly, his early efforts just got him run out of towns by angry mobs, and it was during these panicked flights that he ran into Vikus. Sharing the same ideals of justice and compassion, the two vowed to make their own order to fulfill this destiny.


Now Osryx stands as one of the two leaders of the Knights of the Wrong Table (though he is adamant that everyone has equal status in the order but everyone just keeps saying he is the boss). He works to get this order known and to keep his fellow members safe. Osryx is hopeful yet nervous, always painfully aware of all the obstacles in their path. He just wants to do his part in making the world a better place, but can get dismayed on how much grief the order gets for just trying to do that. His kind heart leads to the team helping the desperate and hopeless, but it also tends to waive client fees when he knows customers have little money to spare. His training in the Underworld has made him a good fighter and a decent wielder of flame, but he prefers to keep violence a later resort. That said, if any danger falls upon a fellow teammate, he won't hesitate in defending them. When on missions, he is often paired with Vikus and finds any excuse he can to stay far away from Roderick.   


Osryx regularly writes letters to his parents back home in the Underworld, always happy to tell them his adventures and what good the order has been doing. Often there isn't a lot to really tell, what with the little work, but he often inflates certain details just to give his folks peace of mind. In response, his mom keeps sending him home-forged weapons to help him survive the cruel freezing lands of the surface. Osryx keeps telling her the surface isn't an uninhabitable wasteland and that he doesn't need an army's worth of blades, but she doesn't really listen as she worries like any mother. These weapons usually find their way into Korgin's clutches, who cannot pass up a demon-forged weapon when he sees one just sitting around.


Vikus - They started their life as just any other Slime at the junk heap, eating scraps and collecting whatever cool bits they found. Things changed when Vikus found a discarded book amongst the refuse that was filled with tales of knights, valor and chivalry. Reading such epic stories inspired them to become just like these heroic knights, and thus they embarked on their own valiant quest. Sadly, wearing armor and arriving to "save the day" isn't enough to win the hearts of people, and they were run out of many villages. Their encounter with Osryx led to the formation of the Knights of the Wrong Table, a place where anyone could become a hero. This new order has gotten the Slime excited at all the possibilities of the future, even when the present is quite lacking. Vikus is incredibly optimistic, always finding a good side to everything and opportunity where there is none. The slightest mention of a problem or rumor of dangerous foes gets the Slime quivering with anticipation, as they believe this is the order's next big break. The Slime's eagerness to help and prove the order's worth tends to get the group involved in issues they weren't invited to and tackling challenges they might not be qualified for. When in front of customers or an audience, Vikus talks like how he thinks a knight should talk, always going on about justice, chivalry and honor. He thinks it gives the order some legitimacy, but outsiders just think it is weird.  


Though they can get lost in this daydream, Vikus does know when to lift spirits and when to acknowledge that they are in way too deep. However, their obsession with knights and heroes is what caused them to eagerly recruit Roderick to their team. The Slime is awestruck by this fabled specter of the past, even though the grumpy ghost absolutely loathes them. When out on business, Vikus sticks with Osryx, as the two act as unofficial leaders of the order. If the order needs to address something officially, these two usually go out to deal with.


Selena - A shade from the Underworld who left for reasons no one is really sure about. As far as anyone can tell, she came to the surface world because she wanted to, and her desire to become a knight developed later. Despite her efforts to disguise her true form so she could trick her way into knighthood, she has been thrown out of every castle and court. When hearing of an order accepting of anyone, Selena was eager to join and wound up being the first member to join the duo. Though it is clear she wanted to become knight, her reasons why aren't exactly clear. She seems more content with making mischief and just generally having fun. She is a frequent prankster and will find any loophole she can in orders so she can make more chaos. Efforts to calm down these antics usually backfire, as Selena does not back down or admit wrongdoing. She is usually possessing an armored knight puppet, using it when out on missions or in battle. Though it does possess a pointy foil as a weapon, the puppet also has numerous spikes on its body because she tends to just throw the whole thing around during a fight. She is usually paired with Cobalus, as her abilities allow her to attach to his equipment and tag along whenever he is underwater. Secretly she is terrified of deep waters, but will never admit that to anyone, which is how she wound up with the one member of the team that swims in such environments.


There is also the unspoken question of how old Selena is, as there are worries she is a lot younger than she claims she is. Osryx knows that shades grow extra sets of arms at certain ages but there is no sign of her second pair being even close to emerging. This is a concern because no one likes the idea of sending a child into battle, but since Selena is already a member and adamant in her actions, there isn't much they can do.


Merrill Myron - A wandering dryad that the order encountered while on mission and wound up recruiting. Merrill is a traveler who sought to visit every corner of the globe and see all the wonders it contains. Where she has been before joining the order hasn't been fully said, as the list is simply too long. It seems she has wandered through many places and picked up a wide variety of knowledge. She seems to know a lot about other cultures, customs and locations, which is vital whenever the order visits a new land. She also has an obsession with flora and fauna, a love which she gained from her grandmother. If there is a cool critter to be found, she is the first one there. Her study of such creatures has developed an almost encyclopedic knowledge of them, and what gaps she has are filled in from notes borrowed from her grandma. Merrill is a very excitable plant that is eager to see new places or new creatures, even if such things are incredibly hostile. This doesn't seem to dampen her mood in the slightest, but it can be a distraction when one should be focusing on the flesh eating monstrosity. While she is very warm and happy, her mood can quickly turn sour if someone makes inappropriate note of her desert dryad appearance. Despite her bubbly attitude, she is actually a formidable fighter due to the knowledge and training she gained during her travels. She is resourceful in battle and in regular everyday life, sometimes to an unsettling degree.   


Merrill is often partnered with Korgin, as their eager excitable natures pair well together. Merrill's knowledge in survival and travel helps a lot when working with Korgin, as the fairy isn't fully experienced with the outside world. As one skilled in backpacking, she also tends to carry a lot of his gear during their travels, as he always over packs and brings too many weapons.


Korgin Sprigs - One of the few fairies to actually leave their hidden groves, Korgin grew sick of his life at home and sought greater things. While others may go out into the great unknown in search of glory, fame or purpose, Korgin appears to have left from boredom. He has a bottomless hunger for adventure and action, which seems to be born from his love for games. He adores board games, card games, tabletops and anything that has strategy, action and the chance to be a smug winner. His role playing adventures from the past is what inspired him to go out and get a taste of that live action with real people. This means he is a very eager member of the team who wants to be sent out on every mission even if he isn't qualified. Unfortunately, it seems his games may have skewed his idea on what happens during these "quests," as he is usually expecting great beasts to fell or impossible challenges to face. He usually assumes that some "twist" will occur during the mission, and the job to retrieve someone's lost pet will actually lead to discovering secret army of vampires plotting world domination. This is why he hoards weapons and collects every piece of equipment he can find, that way he can over pack for trips and carry ten swords despite being hired to fix a fence. His love of games also means that any downtime he has will be spent trying to rope others into playing his incredibly complicated board games. And unfortunately there is a lot of downtime.


As a fairy, Korgin is a stickler when it comes to agreements, promises, deals and anything with fine print. According to him, fairies are big on bargains and striking deals, thus it is incredibly important to know exactly what you are giving, receiving or even agreeing to. It may also explain the love for over complicated games and rules, as he seems bent on finding every loophole and following everything to the exact word. As a result, whenever documents need signing or deals are to be made, they are usually run by him, as he is able to locate troublesome phrasing or deception. This is also the reason why he never shakes anyone's hand, and why he freaked out when he learned most species just do that with reckless abandon (do you people even realize what you are agreeing to?! Did you just say "I promise" without double checking your phrasing!? Sure hope you don't have kids because I think you just sold them off with that handshake!). To top it all off, Korgin is tortured by the fact that barely anyone in the outside world knows what fairies look like or how they function. This is why he wears a pair of fake wings, as he is sick and tired of people asking why he doesn't have them (FAIRIES DON'T HAVE WINGS, YOU IDIOTS).


When on mission, Korgin usually works with Merrill. The two get along great, and his keen mind for strategy and puzzle solving helps the duo get out of tough spots. He also is good at catching mistakes or bad deals that the dryad may miss while she is distracted by a cool bug. Since he can fly, he often carries her on his shoulders whenever aerial combat or maneuvering is called for.    


Telnus - A former water elemental whose body was corrupted when their home pond was turned into sewage dump. The constant exposure to this filth has caused their watery form to turn to waste and rot. No matter what they do, they cannot purge this nastiness from their system, as it just seems to churn it out ceaselessly. Needless to say, they are not too happy about it. Telnus is a very dour, miserable being, always certain that fate will screw anyone and everyone over. They are always in a grumpy mood and have a retort for every line thrown at them. They wound up joining the order because they found one of the posters and scoffed at the idea of a group that just lets anyone in. By plopping their noxious polluted body in their headquarters, Telnus thought they would be teaching these naive fools a lesson, but they somehow still let them join. Though Telnus could have easily declined the offer, they still agreed to join under the excuse that "someone has to keep you fools tethered to reality." Compared to the others, Telnus is very pessimistic, a very vocal critic and never trusts the word of customers or outsiders. They believe they are the only one in the order who understands how the world works, and sometimes he actually speaks truth. While everyone is optimistic and occasionally blinded by the idea that there is good in everyone, Telnus understands that there are also people that use do-gooders as a punching bag. Whenever sent out on missions, they do it with a heavy sigh and a "lets get this over with." Despite their moans and mockery, Telnus does not seem in any hurry to leave the order. The others get the idea that a lot of this is a front, and that the polluted elemental cares more about the team then they care to admit. This can be briefly seen whenever things get really serious or whenever a member faces a legitimate problem. Those struggling with depression or dismay may suddenly find the sarcastic pile of filth giving actual sage advice, though they are quick to deny having a care. In battle, Telnus has also used their own body as a trash shield whenever someone is in mortal danger, taking blades, arrows and bolts to face to keep their teammate safe.


Though they grumble, Telnus does get sent off on missions and will be paired with Alvea most of the time. Since they don't take much of this seriously, Telnus has the tendency to slack off and barely put in any effort. The duty driven ant, however, helps keep them in line and makes sure the job gets done. The elemental, in return, makes sure that Alvea doesn't take the job too seriously and is there to remind her that "disarming" foes is not to be taken literally. Their horrid odor also ensures no one uses pheromones or powerful scents to override her senses.  


Alvea - A giant ant who met the order when they came to help her colony. Back then, she was just another worker amongst many, but wound up being the one assigned as guide for the knights while they aided the queen. Her time with them made her curious of their motives and what lay beyond the colony. When the mission came to an end, she wondered if she could go with them and become a knight as well. When they asked permission from the queen, she granted it. Before she left though, the queen also granted her a name, as those who traveled outside the colony needed one. She was given the name "Alvea" and allowed to leave her fellow sisters behind and join this odd order. The other knights had explained their ways and goals before, and it didn't seem all too different from her life in the colony. Take orders, follow orders, perform the task no matter the cost. It turns out, though, this isn't really how the Knights of the Wrong Table functioned. Doing the job assigned to you was indeed wanted, but the idea you had to complete it even if it means giving you own life was not a sentiment the others shared. As an ant, Alvea takes every task and role as the word of the gods, prepared to do whatever it takes to fulfill her duty. She believes that a worker ant is only good when working, thus she is always busying herself with any job she can find. At first, the order was thrilled to have someone skilled in building and repair, but then they became concerned when they found out she worked for days on end with almost no rest. Even when they explained to her that she could take breaks or let someone else do the job, she would insist on doing it herself and that a working ant was a worthy any. When break times were enforced on her, she would sneak off to find other jobs to do. The current struggle of the order is to get her to realize that she is more to them then just a worker, and that it is sometimes good to do fun things or simply nothing at all.


As an ant, Alvea is incredibly strong, able to easily lift crushing weights above her head. Around the headquarters, it is great for moving things around and getting construction done. On the field, she is a one bug wrecking machine, usually grabbing chunks of the environment and crushing foes with it. This can sometimes be a problem when the fight is in town, and she starts grabbing important statues to use as a stone club. Not to mention that the order prefers not to kill when it isn't necessary, and a battle crazed ant can easily rip a person in two. This is part of the reason why she is paired with Telnus, as the weary elemental helps tone down her violence and can use their stench to dampen the stink of blood and fear that drives her into a berserker state. As for Alvea's part, she helps keep Telnus on the job, as her devotion to following the orders of Osryx and Vikus to the letter means they have to tag along lest she go off and do it her own, often bloody, way.   


Cobalus - A sea creature that has found himself exiled from his home and now trapped on land. Cobalus is a Sea Goblin that was once a part of a community deep in the ocean. Amongst the rest of his kind, Cobalus had a family and served as the hunter to feed his young while his mate guarded them. Though life had been going good, an aberration caused the local fish populations to vanish, leaving the Sea Goblins desperate for food. With very little prey to be found, Cobalus spent everything he had to bring what meager food he could find to his family. Desperate to keep his young alive, he refused to eat, making sure their stomachs were filled first. Sadly, his efforts finally took their toll, and Cobalus couldn't handle the hunger pains any longer. Far from his family, with no fish around to eat, he found the carcass of another Sea Goblin and gave into cannibalism. He swore to only eat enough to regain his strength, but his very first bite doomed him. When he returned to the community, the stink of his crime was plain to all and he was condemned. For the sin of cannibalism, he was not only exiled from their reef but was also sentenced to death. Large crustacean enforcers seized him and dragged him from the sea, pulling him away from his beloved family. They hauled him onto the land and stranded him far from the waves, intending for the burning sun and cruel land to serve as executioner. Cobalus would have perished there, had it not been a pair of knights who happened to pass by. An ant and noxious elemental found him struggling for life, as the heat baked him and his gills fought for air. There was the offer to return him to the ocean, but he could not go back. Surely the crustaceans would be waiting for him if he somehow wriggled his way back. So instead, the elemental used what meager water powers they had to draw fluid from the earth and air to soak his gills and keep his hide moist. The ant went off to get a portable water source for the great beast, and so the elemental stayed with him during the wait. At this point, the sea goblin was ready to give up and accept death, but the elemental refused to let him perish. What occurred or was said during these long hours remains a secret to just Cobalus and Telnus, but by the end Cobalus agreed to go with the knights and find a new life with them.


Saved by the order, Cobalus now lives in a salty pond that was dug next to the headquarters. Though he spends most of his time off mission in this water hole, he is not confined to it. A specially constructed water tub with wheels serves as his method of travel, and he also has a water-filled collar that goes around his gills to let him breath when on land. Though he is a sea creature, he is able to tolerate swimming in freshwater with the help of salt cakes he regularly consumes. With his swimming prowess, he takes to the waterways on missions, either for scouting, pulling along boats for travel or being a fast responder to far away emergencies. As a newcomer to the world of dry land, he is rather naive and nervous, not quite knowing how things work. He is a very cautious soul and lacks confidence in his actions, as his previous choices in life led to his exile. He enjoys helping where he can, and tends to think of this service as paying off the debt of his crime. Though Cobalus tries to think positive of his new life, he cannot help but think of his lost family. When left to dwell in his pond for too long, his thoughts often turn sour and he gets depressed. Thoughts of guilt tend to torture him, believing he failed his family and that he should have died for his trespass. Whenever this terrible mood befalls him, Telnus is quick to arrive to talk with him. At times, the two may simply leave the headquarters together to travel the waterways, so that Cobalus can stretch his fins and let his mind dwell on other things. As per usual with Wrong Table regulations, whenever these personal emergencies arise, they are free to do what they need and the order will take care of the rest. Personal health is always top priority.   


When out on mission, Cobalus gets paired with Selena. The shade is able to possess his collar and tub, and thus hitch along without worry of breathing underwater. Her confidence, though sometimes misplaced, and energy helps the cautious sea beast take action, and her carefree ways may get him to ease up on the worrying. However, Selena is still a mischievous shadow and may pull Cobalus into crazy situations without his knowledge. His bulk and ability to spit powerful jets of water help get him out of these tricky scenarios, though it may feel like Selena is relying on him to clean up her mess. Osryx and Vikus step in from time to time to give her a talking to about such things, and she is getting better about pulling these stunts on him.


Alex - A stone construct that was built for labor, Alex spent many decades in this role, working like the rest of their kind to build castles, walls and towns. These men of stone were created for an endless life of work, as they would never tire or require things like food and water. Since they were made for this role, Alex never had any anger or contempt towards their masters, as this was just how life was. They would build the castle, and once that was done, move onto the next one. Moving from project to project, and getting new masters each time allowed Alex to see and learn new things during their years of service. Obviously, all these observations and thoughts were kept to themselves, as their kind were meant to work and not talk. However, one day Alex found their life taking an abrupt turn, when a group of freedom fighters crept into their work site and severed the magical bindings that tied them to their owners. Before, a construct was forced to obey those that were designated as their masters, a rule embedded into them from creation. But this group removed this constraint, allowing the constructs to do as they please and make their own choices.


Though Alex did not find this life of work so bad, they were indeed excited by the chance to get out and do all the things they only heard about before. They left their severed masters and began to wander, looking to experience the world. However, they weren't really good with directions, as they were used to others telling them where to go. Alex wound up getting lost in the wilderness for some time, and began to question if this solo act was going to work out. Freedom was swell, but a little order and direction would be appreciated. When a group approached the wandering statue, they believed this was their chance to join something new. However, these folk were here to reclaim the freed laborer, hoping to reestablish control over them and sell them back to their master. Alex couldn't really put up a fight, since such constructs were forbidden from hurting humans. Thankfully, a strange band of various species arrived and fought off these slavers. When the dust settled, they let Alex go about their business and sought to leave. However, Alex had learned about their order and liked the sound of what they did. To be a knight! That sounded like an incredible thing! Alex always wanted to be one! So Alex happily joined their ranks and became a knight of the Wrong Table.


As a hulking stone construct, Alex is certainly an intimidating sight to behold. Brutish in size, staggering in weight and containing an almost impossible amount of strength, this knight would certainly be a powerhouse if they actually wanted to. However, Alex is a gentle soul who doesn't care much for fighting. Rather, they would happily do heavy lifting when needed and help shoulder any burden that plagues others. In this new world of freedom, Alex is quite curious and loves to ask questions. Due to the glacial speed they move and talk, some outsiders may assume them having a slow simple mind. However, Alex's teammates have learned that this is simply the pace such constructs move, and there is nothing wrong with that. When asked a question, Alex will take a noticeable pause before they answer, which can give the idea that they don't understand or didn't hear you. This is actually because their mind has to properly receive the question then calculate out a response, no matter how complex or easy the question is. They will answer eventually, one just needs to be patient. Alex has a lot of knowledge in things like construction, architecture, city planning and fortifications, it just takes some time for it to come out.


While Alex does enjoy being a knight, saving the day and helping others, there are some other things on their mind. During their years of labor, the construct heard about all these wonderful and strange things whenever their masters or human workers would speak around them. Talk of things like going to the circus, or going sledding or being invited to a ball. Alex isn't fully sure what those things are, but it certainly sounds magical! So as the years went by, they started making a list in their head of all these fantastical things that they wanted to see and do, which is supposedly something humans do too! Now that they are free, they can finally do just that! Alex took the time to write all these dreams onto a list, that way they could keep them in order and check them off as they got done. However, it should be noted it is an extremely long list (actually multiple lists), as it has been compiled over the course of decades. The other knights support Alex in doing these tasks or visiting these places, though it can prove to be a challenge at times. They certainly want the construct to achieve all their dreams, but doing things like "horseback riding" or "ice skating" may be a little difficult to pull off.


When out on mission, Alex is often partnered with Goregok. Their slow, calm pace helps soothe the temperamental suit of armor, and they are patient when dealing with an outburst. It also helps that being made of stone makes them bite-proof. 


The question has been brought up if the name "Alex" is short for "Alexander" or "Alexandra" or any other name. To them, there is no concrete answer. In fact, they like to try out some different names from time to time. Some days it is Alexandra, others Alexander, and sometimes spice it up with an Alexis or Alexandria.        


Goregok - A living suit of armor covered in hungering maws and iron teeth, Goregok was originally a foe of the Wrong Table. Created by a mad wizard, they were meant to be a weapon of vengeance, to devour those who wronged their angry master. After devouring countless livestock and various warriors, the Knights of the Wrong Table arrived to put a stop to the ravenous beast. During the battle, however, Vikus took note of Goregok's actions and realized that the wizard was more at fault for the armor's rage. Goregok was simply following the commands of their master, and was punished whenever they disobeyed. So when the wizard met an untimely, but accidental, end, there was the question of what to do with the chomping armor. The consensus came to spare the creature, but Vikus took it one step further by letting them join the order. The Slime saw a good soul deep within those slavering maws, and believed a chance at knighthood could help bring that out.


While everyone (well almost everyone) was fine with keeping Goregok alive, there was some worry when the armor joined them at base. Though there is no evil wizard to drive them to violence, the armor is quite temperamental and prone to outbursts. All it takes is for something to slightly go wrong or for something to startle the toothy armor for it to fly into a rage and start chewing the furniture. Covered in shredding jaws, Goregok can certainly do a lot of damage. The concern arose that the angry suit of armor may devour their entire headquarters in time, but these worries came to rest when Goregok was paired with Alex. The peaceful stone construct was found to be a perfect match for them, and was well suited to dealing with Goregok's volatile nature. It didn't take long to notice that the suit of armor was much calmer around the statue, and was doing better at controlling their temper. Even then, there are still some things that get it raving and biting, but Alex is always close at hand to bring peace back to the situation.


Though covered in mouths, Goregok cannot talk. They instead communicate in growls, howls and metallic screeches. Efforts have been made to help teach them how to read and write, but this has been postponed due to all the books being chewed in half.


Though Goregok can easily shred metal and flesh in their jaws, they are only deployed in battle when absolutely necessary. The order likes to avoid killing when they can, and anytime the ravenous armor is unleashed it is sure to be a bloodbath.


Reknir - A fire breathing lindworm who joined the order, and even he isn't really sure why. Before, Reknir kept to himself in the wilderness, finding no love in the devouring of livestock or burning of villages. While his friends and family enjoyed a good ol dragon rampage, he never really saw the point. Due to this, his parents began to question his life choices, wondering what proper lindworm would rather sulk in a cave then incinerate the wretched humans in flames of vengeance. Reknir ignored these concerns for as long as he could, until he finally decided to humor his parents. If he just burned one measly village or ate one valiant knight, then they would be happy and leave him alone. Looking for potential targets, he learned of some weird group of "knights" who were stationed out in the middle of nowhere. Believing them rookies and fools, he figured it would be an easy battle. Just turn them all to ash and make his folks proud. Once he got there though, he found that the order had no quarrels with his presence or even tried to pick a fight. As far as he knew, knights were supposed to slay dragons the second they saw one, but these ones were talking to him and even offering him an application form! At first, Reknir refused this offer and slithered back into the wilderness, but he couldn't shake his curiosity. Eventually he returned, in the dark of the night, and agreed to join their ranks on the promise that no one would know of this. Dragons don't like knights, and a dragon who became a knight would certainly be seen as a traitor of the worst degree.


Though a lindworm, Reknir has no real drive for battle and burning, enjoying time in lounging about and basking in the sun. Talk of fame and glory doesn't interest him, and he often just does missions to get the job done. However, he does possess a dragon's rage, and can quickly lose his temper when people prod him. This is when the flames fly, when he becomes annoyed at others or is attacked by a foe. In these cases, he is a powerful fighter and can reduce the battlefield to ash. This is great when said field is filled with undead, and less great when the battle is taking place in town. Reknir is a valuable ally when battling overwhelming odds, but there is no denying that he has certainly caused some problems for their reputation. You can't really save a village when it is burned to the ground. At least he can use these accidents to pretend that he is being all dragon-like to his parents, as they hear tales of a crazed lindworm burning villages to the ground. Though he does cause damage and may not seem the most enthused in doing knightly things, the others can see that he enjoys his time with the order and finds something in helping others out. Even more so when the order comes to the aid of dragons, preferring to listen to their troubles rather then do the usual knight routine of slaying them. Even in these scenarios, Reknir denies affiliation with the order, usually coming up with some fake story to explain his presence.


Not long after joining the order, Reknir was paired with Otis and the two became inseparable. He seems to always have that snail perched on his snout or head, and there is definite worry in his eyes whenever the two have to part. Reknir really enjoys his conversations with the snail, who offers good advice and comforting words to his situation. Though he may crack jokes about ol' "Bite-Size," Reknir has shown he is willing to fight to the death to keep the snail safe. Abandon all hope to those who dare raise a finger against his friend, as this lindworm will unleash an unstoppable fury if this happens. 


Otis - A snail that slowly found their way to the Knights of the Wrong Table and decided to give this whole knight thing a shot. Otis was a later addition to the team, but that was mainly because it took so long for him to crawl to their doorstep. As a snail, he isn't much of a fighter, but he serves as the brains for a lot of things. Otis is quite the wise member of the group, spending a lot of time in silent pondering and meditation. He only really speaks when he has something worth saying, which often makes outsiders think he is slow or cannot talk at all. He is always willing to lend an ear whenever a teammate has a problem, and he usually has solid advice to give afterwards. Even if he cannot fight, Otis helps on the battlefield by being lookout and noticing weaknesses in a foe. Since he is always with Reknir during these scenarios, he works to watch his blind spots and call out incoming attacks. He spends a lot of time with the lindworm, as the two very much enjoy each other's company. Otis also gets along well with Alex, as the two sync up with their slow pace in life. His presence is valued amongst the order, but there is no denying that detractors point towards him when they are mocking the Wrong Table. What good can a snail knight do? Well, it turns out they can do a whole lot. There is more to being a knight than being a warrior, and Otis' wisdom has helped many a soul.


Sir Roderick - The ghost of a once famous knight, Roderick remains even though his legacy has long passed. Decades ago, Sir Roderick was a beloved knight, who slayed many a dragon and fought in countless battles. It was said the heads of all the beasts he slayed could decorate an entire castle, and statues were erected in the towns he saved from dragon fire. As a powerful warrior and inspiring figure, he charged onto the battlefield to lead entire armies to war. Roderick was a well known name, all until one fateful day. Roderick was readying for another fight, as the enemy front slowly inched closer and closer. With his forces waiting for their leader to give the order, Roderick rode forward first to let out a battle cry. It was then a single arrow shot across the field and into his visor, killing him instantly. This abrupt and humiliating death infuriated the proud knight, so much so that his spirit refused to pass on through sheer fury. Roderick arose as a ghost, unable to accept that this pathetic death was how his legacy would end. Sadly, his presence as a spirit did little to preserve what he left behind. The demise of Roderick wound up becoming a punchline to many warriors and knights, easily undermining any reputation he once had. As a spirit, Roderick could do little to defend his name, as ghosts were widely seen as evil beings and discovery of his existence would lead to a prompt eradication. As time marched on, Roderick could only watch as his statues were replaced and his legacy faded into nothing. His name was a joke now, and newer better knights overshadowed his meager tales. Watching all of this filled Roderick with a bitter rage, furious that his life's work was reduced to such a state. Not to mention these young knights were a disgrace to the order, violating tradition and not doing it they way they used to back in his day!


Hatred burned within this spirit, and he soon found another source of anger when he caught wind of an order of "knights" that had no king or any shred of authenticity. Oh now we are just using that word for anything now!? Enraged beyond all reason, Roderick hunted down these supposed "knights" and decided to give them a piece of his mind. He nearly died a second time when he saw the barn they called home and beheld a Slime and demon within! To think! These monstrous freaks tarnishing the integrity of knighthood! This of course led to an incredibly dated rant that none present dare repeat. When he was done, he figured the two savages would flee or attack him, but much to his confusion one of them started celebrating. The sheer excitement of the Slime left him bewildered, especially when it whipped out some old crusty book from who-knows-where. Apparently this sentient pile of snot had read all about Roderick's adventures in some tome it found in the trash (wow, how flattering), and was a huge fan of him. The Slime was so ecstatic to meet their hero, that Roderick was somehow admitted to the order on the spot right then and there. This of course led to more insults and unsavory words, but the Slime wouldn't stop in their enthusiasm. With nowhere really left to go, Roderick at last conceded in staying with the order. At least maybe he could whip them into shape and teach them a thing or two about being knights.      


Though Vikus was the one responsible for getting Roderick to join the team, most of the other members are not thrilled about Roderick's presence. This is because he is an utterly insufferable person who has many awful opinions he is too willing to share. As he likes to point out frequently, the members of the Wrong Table belong to species that true knights are known for killing. Demons and dragons only belong in the world of knighthood so that their heads can be nailed to walls as trophies. As a former knight, he does have insider knowledge and advice to give, one just has to wallow through a whole lot of insults to find it. He's has caused enough ruckus that the order has threatened to revoke his membership, but that really doesn't do much. Even if they kicked him out, he would still just stick around the barn hurling insults. As a ghost, no one can really do anything about him. The one thing they can do, however, is drive him crazy by pairing him with Coat of Arms. The prideful specter cannot deal with the idea that he is saddled with a coat rack, but his yelling and ranting does nothing against a piece of furniture.


Coat of Arms - A coat rack wearing pieces of armor and a helmet, and yet they are a member of the order. No one knows where they came from or how they filled out an application, but one day this coat rack showed up in the barn with a form already sitting in the bin. At first, everyone assumed it a prank, believing it was Selena's doing. However, no one has owned up to dressing up this coat rack or moving it around the headquarters. They can be found standing in various locations, but no one has seen them move. After enough time passed and the mystery remained unsolved, the rest of the knights accepted Coat of Arms as a member and granted all benefits that come with the role. Coat of Arms even has their own room in the barn like everyone else, but the door somehow remains locked and no one has ever seen inside. Since it is their personal room, no one is allowed to invade their private space without permission, so even the most curious members can't sneak a peek. As for their role, there really isn't any job for them. No one can figure out what work to assign a coat rack, and it has been very much established that Coat of Arms does not like being treated like a coat rack. So for the time being, they are just around, which sometimes works out pretty well. When in battle with no weapon in hand, a fellow knight may turn around to find Coat of Arms just sitting there, seemingly offering their own body as a crude club. Other times, fleeing evildoers have tripped over this piece of furniture, giving time for the others to catch them (all while the criminal remains befuddled of where that coat rack even came from). As for how they get there, no one really knows and that answer may never be revealed. For now, Coat of Arms is a valued member of the Knights of the Wrong Table, which unfortunately tends to undermine their legitimacy when outsiders see the knights talk to the piece of furniture.  


Coat of Arms is usually teamed up with Roderick, mainly because no one else knows how to work with a supposedly inanimate object. This pairing also occurs just to tick off that wretched ghost, who really hates the idea that a once proud knight has to be stuck with a piece of furniture. As for as anyone knows, Coat of Arms has no complaints about this. 


-------------------------------------------------------


Honestly, it has been so long since I posted anything about these folk that I bet a big chunk of my followers don't even know who they are. Older followers may be like "hey, we thought you forgot about them" but nope! They are in my head every day, it is just that I don't get around to drawing them when I got other projects or monsters going. But for the longest time I wanted to update some designs and backstories for them all, because I think I did most drawings of them back when I didn't even use color. Those who know them will probably notice some noticeable changes here and there. In truth, the changes occurred a long while back, they are just all finally showing up here.


Despite me not drawing them often, I do mean it when I say I think about this group a whole lot. There was a time I wanted to write stories about them, but not sure if that is really going to happen now. Writing is very much not my forte and I can never get myself to work on it when I got drawing to do! To be fair, if I did bust out a couple stories, people would probably notice the wild tonal shifts between each (and tonal shifts in this description as well). Might be a bit weird to go from "investigating the assassination of a fearmonger to stop a brewing race war" to "we got stranded on an island made of candy!"But oh well, no guarantees of if I will or won't. Maybe I will find a time where I do get the hankering to sit down and write, but til then I will just be tormented by their adventures and antics in my head. 


(Also I feel like even after hours of writing this I still screwed up explaining their personalities. Dang it, this was supposed to be a short entry!)

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