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exploding-man — Remorsefull Dream
Published: 2004-12-21 00:11:00 +0000 UTC; Views: 275; Favourites: 0; Downloads: 10
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Description
I woke up from a dream tonight.I never want this feeling again.
Melancholy remorse.
Painful regret.
Shadows from the past remind me,
my opportunities are lost for good.
No looking back.
Beyond repair.
I can only look forward.
I cannot repeat those mistakes again.
Unmade friends.
Love never had.
Comments: 6
hey now...very very good...except the line "Shadows from the past remind me"...its just a little cliche'...let me guess your dream...its about a girl you had...or almost had...and in the dream you hurt her...one way or another...or she hurt you...let me know if im right...or completely wrong
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Heh, but the cliche' fits. I will watch out for that in the future though.
Oh, and I feel that the point of poetry is for personal meaning. It means to you what it means to you. I could be literal and say exactly what the dream was. But what is the fun in that? Its not good poetry, but I don't wish to ruin it.
Thank you very much for the comment.
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yeah... i've felt that way.. actually it's right on it up until 'unmade friends. love never had'.. yeah
well, this is pretty simple but good.. it could make a better long lyric, but that's just what i think...
i visited your page cause i saw the 'i dare someone to submit a picture of a bag of crack' comment.. lol.. lame!
well, good luck with your future poetry..
peace
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Thanks for the comment.
Like said, its just for the sake of practice. Sooner or later I hope to have some better stuff down.
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true.. well, just keep it around in case you wanna do something more with it.. i have so many of those..
allright! .. *sigh .. my stomach.....
later
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