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fragilefacade — Awkward Lullaby
Published: 2003-09-07 16:48:06 +0000 UTC; Views: 389; Favourites: 1; Downloads: 38
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Description You could be love.
You could be fate.
You could be hurt.
You could be hate.
You could begin to desecrate.
You could catch me since you’re the bait.

I’m forced to feel.
I’m forced to cry.
I’m forced to quit.
I’m forced to try.
I’m forced to urge my life to die.
I’m forced to tell the truth and lie.

You could be next.
You could be true.
You could be peace.
You could undo.
You could alter the crimson hue.
You could be frightening. Something new.

You smile and laugh.
You smile and jeer.
You smile and push.
You smile and cheer.
You smile at me another year.
You smile and fade things from the clear.

You could be blind.
You could foresee.
You could believe.
You could not be.
You could create the secret key.
You could become the end of me.

© Sylwia Wielgosz 2003.
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[ TEXT ]


fragilefacade - The Eighth Of March
Comments: 22

Cloudpow [2007-12-17 22:46:56 +0000 UTC]

Reminds me of a friend I once had. Beautiful.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Dracura [2005-09-30 03:31:45 +0000 UTC]

I went cold and partially numb when I read this. Right about now, this could apply to my life. You truly are amazing.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

hchan [2003-09-20 17:05:16 +0000 UTC]

Ddhh.. ::wants to draw 'cos of this e.E;;::

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Loser69 [2003-09-14 23:11:32 +0000 UTC]

Wow, it's you, accidental stalking exits apparently.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

acidangel [2003-09-13 02:16:08 +0000 UTC]

As I said before, you just keep gettin better

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

fragilefacade In reply to acidangel [2003-09-13 23:24:38 +0000 UTC]

Thank you. ^^

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

theinquisitions [2003-09-11 23:46:55 +0000 UTC]

This is a nine inch nails song. It must be. Same quality and aura. Wicked, mysterious, challenging. Its rather unlike your signature style, a pleasant surprise.

I can guess who it is who was the power.

You have such a gift of words Sylwia

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

fragilefacade In reply to theinquisitions [2003-09-12 00:11:32 +0000 UTC]

Wow. Comparing me to Trent is ... wow. Kim would kill you.

That would be really funny to witness.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

theinquisitions In reply to fragilefacade [2003-09-12 00:19:00 +0000 UTC]

i have a bullet proof jacket and im a swordsman...person thing.

i speak only truths.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

shatteredone [2003-09-10 04:23:24 +0000 UTC]

hmm... *ponders likeness of poem* now i generally am a fan of repetition and its wonderful impact. however i'm not sure it worked for this one. perhaps its just me but it just seems too much repetition and one can get bored... just me though!

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--ant-- [2003-09-08 04:53:14 +0000 UTC]

oooooooooowwww repitetition very nice

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

fragilefacade In reply to --ant-- [2003-09-08 10:57:04 +0000 UTC]

lol. Thanks.

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phaze05 [2003-09-08 00:19:05 +0000 UTC]

na alliteration is when u use the words posesing the same first letter, eg= " which way went Wendy Woodstooper who whipped Willy's willy?"....

yeah i like thw poem, repitition ands to the impact of the message.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

fragilefacade In reply to phaze05 [2003-09-08 10:56:46 +0000 UTC]

Thanks!

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blameshiori [2003-09-07 18:39:01 +0000 UTC]

The repetition (alliteration, was it?) was just perfect for this piece. Great work.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

fragilefacade In reply to blameshiori [2003-09-07 19:22:20 +0000 UTC]

Thanks much. (Haven't a clue.)

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nxoxtxhxixnxg [2003-09-07 18:14:58 +0000 UTC]

this is really good. the rhyming is done in perfect rhythm, not a line out of place. great job!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

fragilefacade In reply to nxoxtxhxixnxg [2003-09-07 19:21:23 +0000 UTC]

Thank you.

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fragilefacade [2003-09-07 17:04:26 +0000 UTC]

Thank you.

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tragicrabbit [2003-09-07 16:55:39 +0000 UTC]

aww.. i hope you feel better this is beautiful.. the flow is so even and the rhyming is perfect. your writing is great, it keeps me inspired

- brittany

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pandachan [2003-09-07 16:53:13 +0000 UTC]

Another very beautiful piece of writing. I love how the poem just flows so well together, and honestly, I simply adore it.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

fragilefacade In reply to pandachan [2003-09-07 17:03:58 +0000 UTC]

Thank you.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0