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Published: 2009-11-29 01:41:09 +0000 UTC; Views: 202; Favourites: 2; Downloads: 4
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~~~~~~~~Sarah's P.O.V.~~~~~~~~"What the hell is this? A note?"
Frankie,
I once read a quote it said, 'In death, there is also life.' I can only hope that with my death, a burden will be lifted off your shoulders and your life will be made better. Don't blame yourself for anything: it's just me, it's just the way I am. Just try to remember the good parts of me…if there ever were any. I love you Frankie.
~Forever remember that kiss~
'Katherine. That's the only person this could be from…what the fuck is she thinking? She's not really gonna kill herself…is she? She can't! I swear to God if she does anything I'm dragging her ass back up from hell to beat her! …crap, I gotta do something, and fucking fast…where could she be…think Sarah…'forever remember that kiss' That's it! 'That kiss', she's gotta mean our first kiss, in the woods…God damn it, Katie why do you have to fall this deep in love, oh whatever. I can bitch at her for that another time. Katie please don't do anything stupid, just hang on till I get there.'
'God fuck it! I need to run faster! I don't have time to be out of shape! Calm down Sarah just take deep breathes. Ok I'm almost there. I got this.'
Little did I know, there was no way I could have prepared myself for what I was about to see, not even if I had 100 years.
I was right, Katie meant the spot where we shared our first kiss, but when I arrived in the woods I didn't just see Katie with a razor or a bottle of booze, that would have been too kind. I saw my best friend, which I would jump off a bridge for, kneeling on the ground, shaking, with a gun pressed tightly against the side of her head. "Katie stop!!! This is bullshit! You don't have to do this!"
"That's all you ever say! That my feelings are bullshit and I need to stop! Well guess what, you can't just stop loving someone! Even now, I want to hate you so bad but I can't! I can't fucking stop loving you!!!!"
I had told myself all the way to the woods that I wouldn't cry, that I would stay strong and not get mushy, but none-the-less my tears flowed freely down my checks. "Katie, that's not what I mean."
"Then what the fuck do you mean Sarah? Or better yet, what do I mean!?!?! Do I mean anything to you? Or did you just come down here so the last words I ever heard were you saying I'm trash!!!!!"
"Katie, just put the gun down and…"
"I don't wanna put it down! I wanna pull the trigger!!!!"
"Fine. Just make sure there's a bullet left over when you're done."
"Wha-what?" Katie's voice was horse and shaky.
"You heard me." I said as I walked up and took the gun from her hand. Then I knelt down and pulled her into a tight hug and God himself couldn't make me let go. "I once read a quote," I smoothed her hair out of her tear-stained face. "it said that just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them too, doesn't mean that they don't love you with all their heart."
I paused and then repeated the quote just in case it didn't get through the first time, even though I was positive it did. "And I'm sorry things didn't work out between us, but I do still love you, as a friend, and I'd take a bullet for you any day."
"I know." Katie sniffled out. "I never blamed you. I just…I'm still in love with you and I don't know how to live without that relationship…I need you, Frankie."
"I'm still here, aren't I? I'm not going anywhere and neither is our relationship. Don't get me wrong, we are just friends, but we are best friends and the closest they come."
"You're not gonna leave me?" Katie spoke in a barely audible voice.
"Never. I will be with you to the end, and you'll get better. Your whole life is not going to be miserable."
"You don't know that."
"Yes I do, cause I'm gonna make sure you get better. And it'll be a long road, but I'll be there every step of the way."
"Thank you." Was all Katie could squeak out before collapsing into uncontrollable sobs, clinging to me like the world would explode if she let go…which I guess was true, in her world anyways…so I just held her, just as tight, trying, and once again failing, to hold back my own tears.
I don't know how long we sat there in the forest holding each other and bawling like babies, but in the end I guess it didn't really matter. Our tears eventually stopped and anything that one of us wasn't sure of or was confused about was straightened out. And what seemed like eons later we were laying side by side in the leaves laughing and talking. I even think I recall a promise or two being made about some guitar lessons and getting the same therapist as Gerard Way…don't know how that one came out…but that doesn't really matter either. What matters is that Katie was alive and the two of us were together, best friends forever.
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Comments: 12
HELLANDHALOS In reply to all4sorrows [2010-01-19 02:17:38 +0000 UTC]
What's with the "......"
And you finally came on DA!!!!!!!!!!!!
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
nhphoenix24 [2009-11-30 13:18:10 +0000 UTC]
I wish deviantart had a like button like facebook.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
HELLANDHALOS In reply to nhphoenix24 [2009-12-01 20:41:03 +0000 UTC]
What'd ya mean 'a button like facebook'?
Like a favorite button?
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
nhphoenix24 In reply to HELLANDHALOS [2009-12-04 13:19:21 +0000 UTC]
Like when somebody posts a status update there's a like button if you don't really feel like actually commenting. just a thumbs up that says nhphoenix24 likes this. You seriously need to go on facebook more.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
HELLANDHALOS In reply to nhphoenix24 [2009-12-05 16:13:58 +0000 UTC]
That is sweet
And the only reason I don't go on facebook is because I don't know how to do anything on there.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
nhphoenix24 In reply to HELLANDHALOS [2009-12-08 13:41:14 +0000 UTC]
I'll teach you next time I'm over
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Shikkyakuha [2009-11-29 12:04:20 +0000 UTC]
katy, your writing's so powerful. i really loved it. it made my heart beat really fast.
lame comment sorry but i cant seem to put it right
basically you're fucking awesome
kay.
p.s
just to amuse you, know that i am currently typing ths under the blankets of my bed, using borrowed (stolen) mother's laptop. at 11 o'clock at night.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
HELLANDHALOS In reply to Shikkyakuha [2009-11-29 14:19:30 +0000 UTC]
Thank you so much Ok you just made me like cry, but they're happy tears....THANK YOU!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Shikkyakuha In reply to HELLANDHALOS [2009-12-22 03:52:00 +0000 UTC]
katy, i am always happy to help.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
HELLANDHALOS In reply to Shikkyakuha [2009-12-23 23:07:25 +0000 UTC]
Yay! And did you read my second note? Tis not a freak out one, promise, it basically just says that I'm sorry for freaking out, I love you, and we can try to stop things together...if you want. Tis up to you
👍: 0 ⏩: 0