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hellostrangeone — The Doctrine
Published: 2010-01-16 00:33:30 +0000 UTC; Views: 98; Favourites: 1; Downloads: 3
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Description
today she asked mewhy
and I couldn't
even tell her
because I didn't
know the reason
on my knees
just waiting
for something
to believe in
(what I wouldn't give
to have
faith
in anything)
so I carve my way
into nothing
without any
wise hand
to mentor me towards
some death
that may even
give a damn
one day;
but not today
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Comments: 7
I see others saying it needs work but I absolutely enjoy the way that you convey such a raw emotion into the context of moving on in life, be it towards death. Very nice work.
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thanks so much. I really appreciate it.
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I know I sound like a broken record, but you've got a knack for sharp, concise writing! 
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these ones aren't lyrics. it was inspired by a conversation with a therapist, and we got into a discussion about faith and God. it's something that's been on my mind lately. I feel like this poem of mine isn't my strongest though.
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interesting context--it does evoke a similar theme to "Living." I still like the piece, but if you do build more, shoot it by so I can see!
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I kinda like it. posibly work on it a bit? it seems like it should say more... I dunno. its kinda late here hehe. never comment half asleep. but I digress. I like it, sad from where I'm standing, because I have faith, but it definitely hits where a lot of people are and were(yes me included) right on the head. nice work=] not bad for late night
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I may expand on it later. Thanks though!
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